We arrived back at Tiffani's house out of breath and in a frenzy.  Marta opened the door and ushered us in the kitchen where she put out snacks and drinks.  No one said anything about Tiffani, or the night's events so I just chewed in silence, wondering how I'd gotten myself into a situation like this in the first place, and how I was going to get out of it. 

After the plates were empty and the glasses dry we sat, like a pack of survivors from a storm staring into nothing as if waiting for blankets and cups of coffee from a random red cross worker.  I stood from my chair thinking whatever was going on I'd had enough of it, and wanted to get home. The robot girls and Marta gave me a death ray glare and I immediately sat back down in the silence.  Was this deprogramming?  Were the robot girls sending their messages through blue tooth to the queen?  Whatever was happening it all ended in a blink when Tiffani made her way down the stairs.

Immediately all the girls stood up and lined across the bottom like Tiffani was making a party entrance and was truly a blue blooded queen.  And while I admit she had the outfit and walk down, the fact that she had just sent us on a murder proved she wasn't  (Or wait, actually that's exactly what a queen would do, I've seen Game of Thrones!)

She plastered on a smile and all the girls started fidgeting and talking at the same time, forcing her to hold up her hand (which I have to admit, looked like a queen waving) and shutting the whole talking at once thing down.  She stood directly in front of me and snapped her fingers which apparently was secret code for robot Mindi to start talking.

"It's done, we did it.  I mean, yeah, that's what I mean, we did it."

Tiffani rolled her eyes to where Mindi stood.  "And?"

Mindi looked toward the other girls as if someone could jump in who actually had a psychic connection to Tiffani and knew what the hell she was talking about.

"And?  Umm, and she's dead." Mindi muttered in a cautious whisper with her eyes toward the floor.

Before Tiffani could respond Marta could be heard in the kitchen throwing around the plates and letting loose a slew of spanish.  Jesus, Mary, and Joseph were the only words I could understand but I got the drift.  Had I known how to speak spanish I would have marched my butt in there and thrown some plates with her, this was the Twilight Zone and I was never a big fan of that crazy series.

Tiffani remained standing in front of me, making my skin crawl around and search for cover. Apparently we were involved in a game of stare, and I wasn't about to back down.  She crossed her arms across her chest and I did the same, something primal in me was telling me to go full on Housewives and give her hair a yank while another part was screaming to make a run for it.  Finally Mindi's nasally voice broke the silence.

"She tried to bribe us, when she was in the tub!  And she said you were a whore and would bring us down!"  Mindi spoke quick and high pitched and I could imagine dogs taking cover and old people looking out the windows to find the hyena.

Without breaking the stare Tiffani got a smug look on her face and said directly in my face "What was it she offered you?"

I could feel my heart hammering in my ears.  I couldn't remember the story, my mind blanked and for the life of me I couldn't think of anything that would make this serial killer back down until it dawned on me, the one thing someone could offer me that I'd seriously consider taking them up on.

"You."  I answered with all the boldness of a debate team Captain.  "She offered to let us kill you, and take us under her wing without making us work for it."

Tiffani smiled like I just gave her the heart transplant she obviously needed.  "Acceptable, she was better at the game than I imagined.  Where's my prize?"

We all looked at each other while Tiffani seated herself in the plush leather chair, put up her feet and held out her hands.

"Prize?" Mini asked.  "What prize?  Were we supposed to get you a charm too?  I'm so sorry, I didn't know."

Tiffani gave her the look you'd give when you accidentally look in the bowl before flushing after having mexican food.  "I don't want a stupid Pandora charm, do I look homeless to you?  I want the kidney.  Did you bring me the kidney?"

I tried to concentrate on the spinning room and keeping my legs from falling instead of my mouth but something snapped and it opened despite my warning.

"Are you flipping serious?  You wanted the kidney?  We just killed a girl.  We stuck her in an icebath and removed a body part to keep up with some sick fantasy you have about urban legends and being a prom queen with a dollar store sash and you wanted the kidney?"  Spit flew with the words, and even as I said them my hands clenched together.  If they weren't balled into fists I probably could have covered my mouth but this was pure instinct.

The robot girls gasped and collectively backed away from me, leaving me a single sitting duckling in the midst of a giant anaconda with extensions and acrylics.  Tiffani rose from the chair and again walked right in front of me.  Her breath, which smelled amazingly fresh and minty for someone I'd never seen eat, came out in sharp puffs landing on my cheek.

"I understand you're emotional, virgin.  And I'm going to let that slide because despite not getting a prize, I'm happy with the way you whores actually pulled phase one off.  But this is a one time pass.  One.  And it's over.  Disrespect me again and you'll wake up with your anus sewn to your face in a place no one will ever find you except the people I send you to as a disposable blow up toy.  You get that biatch?  Let me know if you don't because this is important."

I took a step backward, shooting pains now present in by butt, and the image of her threat searing itself in my brain.  I nodded, knowing full well she'd make good on her promise.  She had obviously given it some thought, that was no random synaptic response.  And if it was, that was even scarier than thinking it out.

Tiffani grabbed the remote and held it toward the wall, dimming the lights and dropping a screen the size of an imax theatre.  "This is a good night, isn't it girls?  How about some popcorn and we binge last season of Scream Queens?"

The girls squealed and herded themselves on the sofa, were I numbly followed, planning a little revenge of my own.

********************************************
Well Tiffani didn't take too long to show her psycho side. How much more will I take?  Are you staring to believe me now??   Now even binge watching Good Mythical Morning changed this panic slump. Link if your out there answer this question: "How do you kill a crazy Prom Queen wannabe?"