X. too young for so much worry

Mia saw herself and her dead sister in Lizzie and Mika Samuels. She saw herself partially in the eldest Samuels sister. The responsibility she had while still being so young. The things she had to see. And the way she had to stay strong for her sister's sake. Mia never got the chance to protect Paris. She was dead before she could try. But Lizzie had Mika. They were sweet girls. They still had their innocence. Mia hoped they never lost it. Not like she had.

The sickness was still spreading. Rick and the other adults ordered for those who were feeling sick to stay away. Mia followed the rule as best she could. Lizzie and Mika stood by the fences. "Hey guys." The sight of the walkers on the other side made her nauseous.

Mika turned around and smiled. "Hi, Mia!"

Lizzie's back reminded turned. "Hi, Lizzie."

Their eyes met. The younger girl smiled. It barely reached her eyes. Their dad was dead. A walker bite. The sisters watched him die. Mia felt sympathetic. "I heard about what happened with your dad. I'm so sorry, girls."

"Thanks. I guess we need to start getting used to it." Mika replied with a small shrug. She was just a kid. She didn't understand just how hard it would be.

Carol came over. She'd been watching Lizzie who couldn't keep her attention away from the dead creatures. "Lizzie, those are walkers. Nick was a walker. You don't feel bad about that walker dying.  You feel bad about your dad. You loved him and he's gone."

The way she expressed it made Mia grow more sad. But she also understood. Lizzie's obsession with the walkers was disturbing. Scary. Dangerous. The way she couldn't decipher between the living and the dead. But she was only twelve. It was a hard spot to be in.

"Yeah," was all Lizzie said. The words didn't sink in.

The walkers snarled louder. Mia stared at them. Their torn human clothes and human shoes. But they weren't human. Not anymore. She understood that. So she couldn't figure out why Lizzie couldn't.

Carol cut a small group of flowers from the ground. Pretty things plucked from the soil. No longer in tacked. She tucked them behind Lizzie's ear. It made her smile. A real one that time. "There."

Lizzie carefully took back her knife. She tucked it in her waistband.

Again, she was so young. This world would try to destroy her. Mia felt as if it already destroyed her. Girls like Lizzie and Mika needed to know they weren't alone. That even in a cruel world there were people like them. People that understood. "Y'know, Lizzie and Mika. I lost my dad, too."

It gained their attention.

"My whole family, actually. I was twelve." She took a short pause. "My mom died from cancer before everything happened. The rest of us, uh, we were in a car accident. I miss my dad the most every day. It's okay for you to miss yours. It's okay to be sad. He was your father. As long as you keep the memories from before and hold them close,  he'll always be with you girls.  I promise." In a way, Mia was speaking to her old self. The girl who thought it was better to end her life than to continue living it. Maybe it was too late for her but Lizzie and Mika still had a chance.

Lizzie formed another smile. It was small but genuine. "Thanks, Mia."

Mika hugged her waist. Her warmth was that of Paris'. Small body. Thin arms. A warmth that made the toughest of men break. Mia hugged her back and imagined her hugging her sister one last time before the car crash.

Carol's hand brushed against her shoulder. It was brief but Mia saw the sympathy on her face. She smiled at her. She smiled back.

Mia didn't know Patrick like the others had but he was kind. He was funny. Awkward, but he had a good heart. His death dimmed an already dark light in the prison. More people were getting sick. More people were dying. Maggie and the others were digging more and more graves.

A small amount of flowers were grasped in her hands. She watched the adults digging graves for the wrapped up bodies. Patrick's grave held his circle glasses. Maggie stopped when she saw her. "Hi, Mia."

"Hi." She said back almost shy. Her eyes shifted to Patrick's grave. "I just—I wanted to come see him for a minute."

Glenn wiped the sweat from his forehead which only created more dirt. "Of course. Stay as long as you want." He told her.

Mia grinned. She sunk to her knees in front of Patrick's grave, the black circle glasses haunting her. She placed the flowers against the wooden board. As she sat in front of his grave, Mia could almost hear his laugh. See his crooked smile. It was a strange feeling. Again, she barely knew him. But he was kind to her. He didn't judge her. She did miss him.

She felt someone sit beside her and she looked over to see it was Maggie. "Are you okay?" The woman softly asked

"I'm just sad I didn't have enough time to get to know him."

Maggie's kind green eyes stared at her gently. She tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. "He was a good person."

Mia nodded. "Yeah, he was. I'm happy I met him. I haven't had a friend in a long time."

"I'm your friend."

She grew a half smile. She looked at her again. "Best friend." She nodded.

Maggie smiled back and wrapped an arm around her. Glenn watched them with a smile of his own.

Mia decided she desperately needed a nap. The heaviness throughout the prison weighed on her mind, making her feel exhausted. She'd gotten used to feeling depressed but losing Patrick sparked the feeling again. The terrible feeling of losing someone.

When she passed by Carl's cell, she saw him sitting on his bed. He stared at the gun in his hands, his mouth gaped open slightly. She paused in the doorway. "Planning on using it any time soon?" She voiced.

Carl flinched, feeling startled. He quickly looked up and saw her. To Mia's surprise, he didn't respond with a snarky comment. He only shrugged. "Hopefully not. But probably."

Things between the two of them had gotten slightly better than their first meeting. Carl finally looked her in the eyes without a cold expression and talked to her without his usual snarky remarks. He had lightened up. Mia didn't feel as awkward around him as she did before, but she still was still shy. She wasn't good at making friends. Patrick came to her naturally but Carl, he was complex.

The corner of her lips quirked up. She noticed a stack of new comics on his nightstand. "Did Michonne get you those?"

He looked between her and the comic books. "Oh, uh, yeah. On her last run." He responded.

Mia grabbed one and examined it. She smiled. "The Amazing Spider-Man. A classic."

Carl's eyes widened. "You read comics?"

"My—" she quickly paused. No, she wasn't ready yet. "Someone I was close to did. I would read them only sometimes." She corrected herself. "I'm more of an actual book person."

"Of course you are." He said with an amused scoff. 

Mia furrowed her brows. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Well. . ." Carl started to say and paused, trying to find the right words. "You're a girl. Girl's don't read comics."

"That's very sexist."

"But it's true. I've only ever met one girl who likes reading comics."

She quirked an eyebrow. "And have you ever read an actual book?"

"Sure I have!"

"Books not related to comic books or video games?"

Pause. "Well. . . No, not exactly. But what's the difference? They both have words." Carl grumbled.

Mia breathed a laugh. "They're completely different. Comics are illustrations. Their stories are told through the eyes of superheroes, not real people. Books are clear and precise and thematic. They're an art. Most books are based off of real people and the stories of their lives. They're made to help you gain more knowledge about literature and teach you about the ways of life."

She didn't realize how lost she got in her explanation until she watched a smile grow on Carl's face. She stopped. "I'm a nerd. I know." She mumbled.

He shrugged. "It's not a bad thing. But that was a good explanation. You almost sold me."

She scoffed. "Almost?"

His smile turned into a smirk and Mia rolled her eyes. "You aren't the least bit curious?"

Carl shrugged again. "It would have to be pretty life changing book."

Mia stared into his icy eyes for a minute before grinning. He watched her run out of his cell with narrow eyes. Had he scared her off?

She looked through the stack of books she had on her the bed. She scattered them out and moved her finger around until she found the perfect one. The one she cherished the most. When she ran back to his cell, Carl was still sitting on his bed like he was waiting for her to come back. She handed him her copy of Little Women.

Carl took the book and stood from his bed. "What the hell is this?"

"This is probably one of my favorite books.  It's brilliant and beautiful. I'll make you a deal. I'll read one of your comics if you read this." She negotiated with him.

He gave her a funny look. "Seriously?"

She grinned. "Seriously. It'll be fun."

She watched him tap his fingers against the cover. He stared into her eyes for a whole minute. Then, she smirked. "Okay, deal. But I get to pick the comic."

Mia shrugged. "Fair enough."

She stood to the side and let him look through his collection of comic books. She secretly hoping he didn't give her anything dumb. Another smirk appeared on his face when he eyed a specific one and pulled it off the shelf. "Here."

She took it from his outstretched hand and examined the cover. "V For Vendetta? What's it about?"

"You'll have to read and find out. It's pretty good." Carl disregarded.

She flipped it around. Part of her wanted to back out of the deal. The other part of her knew he'd never let her live it down if she did. "Alright. We have a deal." She stuck out her hand.

The teenage boy stared at her hand for a minute. He suddenly got shy and shook it. "Uh, yeah, deal." He muttered and quickly pulled it away.

Mia pretended that it didn't hurt her feelings. "Well, let's get reading."