Author's note: Think before you comment. Reading persistent death threats, aimed at a character I really care about, really hurts. Frankly, it sometimes make me want to unpublish my whole book.  And if you continue to leave these extreme death threats knowing that it hurts my feelings then you ironically have no right to be acting like you're any better than Mia. Please don't make me feel like shit today :)

---------------------------------

An hour later, I was tucked up in my bed, shoveling spoonful after spoonful of Ben and Jerry ice cream into my mouth. 

I was pathetic. I was acting like a typical heart-broken teenager who had just broken up with their boyfriend. But the plot twist was, we were never even dating in the first place!

 I couldn't exactly blame him for liking Chloe. She was stunning, sexy, popular, and smart. I used to think she was kind too, but I guess I was wrong. 

Kind people don't just giggle when their best friend's crush makes a move on them.

 We had been best friends since kindergarten for crying out loud. I can't believe she would just stab me in the back like that. 

With that depressing thought, I shoved yet another spoonful of ice-cream in my mouth.

The doorbell chimed through the house. I groaned in annoyance and wrapped a blanket around myself. Slowly, I climbed out of bed and down the stairs.

 I opened the door, expecting to see my Mum, but instead May and Chloe, both stood on my doorstep. 

I didn't even hesitate for a second before attempting to slam the door in their faces. 

Unfortunately, May was too quick for me and jammed her foot in the door before it could close.

"Dang it," I muttered as she shoved the door open and marched her way in with Chloe in tow.

 I wasn't mad at May, but she was with the enemy, so I had to make sacrifices. 

"What the hell are you guys doing here?" I mumbled bitterly as I shot Chloe an especially nasty glare.

 "I'm here because you guys need to sort out your issues. Chloe called me in tears because you wouldn't listen to her," May snapped as she shot me an accusation look. 

"You're on her side? Do you know what she fucking did?" I shouted. 

"I'm not on anyone's side, I'm on the side of this is ridiculous and you guys should just talk," May said in exasperation. She stared at us expectantly.

"Talk!" May yelled.

 "Fine," I snapped. I turned to face Chloe and faked a smile. "Chloe, why do you think it's acceptable to stab a friend in the back?" I said arching an eyebrow up at her inquisitively. 

She let out a heavy sigh of annoyance. "I didn't stab you in the back, which you would know if you just shut up for two seconds and let me speak," Chloe snapped angrily. 

I scoffed at her. "Okay fine, I'm listening. I'm actually interested to see what bull crap story you come up with," I said with fake enthusiasm as I flopped down on the sofa.

 Chloe sat down beside me and took a deep breath. "First, thing's first, I don't like Ethan, and he doesn't like me, okay," Chloe snapped. 

"I heard what you guys said, I'm not an idiot Chloe," I laughed cruelly. 

She tugged on the roots of her hair in frustration. "He wasn't saying that to me Mia, he was practicing saying it to you," she spat. 

"That's bull.... wait what?"

 That was not what I was expecting her to say...

"What do you mean..." I asked slowly. 

"He wanted my advice on how to 'woo you' because he thought you were upset with him," she sighed.

 I sat in silence for a long while before finally speaking. "But...But. why did you lie about being sick?" I stuttered weakly, with all anger lost from my tone. 

"Because I didn't want to give his plan away. It was supposed to be a surprise, he was planning a cute little date for you, and I was helping him with what to say..." she explained softly.

"I....er......Well...Shit," I finally said, realizing the extent of how badly I screwed up.

 I looked nervously up at Chloe, and I felt sick to my stomach. 

 I had said such nasty things to her when she was just being a wonderful friend. It was ironic that I had accused her of being a horrible friend when I was the worse one by far.

 I reached out and took her hand in mine. "I'm such an idiot, Chloe, you must hate me. I'm so, so incredibly sorry for the cruel things I said to you. You don't have to forgive me, but I promise I'll make it up to you," I said softly. 

She looked at me straight-faced for a couple of seconds before the corners of her lips stretched up into a smile.

 "Of course, I forgive you, it's not your fault you're an idiot," Chloe said with a cheeky grin.

 I sunk lower on the sofa in embarrassment. "When did I become such a dramatic bitch?" I mumbled. 

"Aww, Mia, you've always been a dramatic bitch," May said, joining in with the teasing. I playfully glared at her and picked up a cushion and threw it at her.

 "Yay, we're all friends again, group hug," May cheered as she pulled us both off the sofa and squeezed the living daylights out of us. I just laughed at May's weirdness.

"Oh my god, Ethan!" I cried as I abruptly pulled away from the hug. 

I had really fucked things up with him. I had said some god, awful nasty things to him. 

"No. No. No," I said as I started to pace around in a panic. I found myself starting to hyperventilate as I tried to remember everything I had said.

 I looked up and saw May and Chloe were watching me with pity.

 "How angry was he when I left?" I cried as I looked over at Chloe in fear. 

"He might have...er...maybe punched a hole in the wall of his house and then locked himself in his room," Chloe rambled out with a nervous laugh. 

"Well, crap. I've ruined everything then, haven't I?" I groaned miserably, as I flopped back down on to the sofa.

 "He was being so incredibly sweet, even when I was acting crazy, and I didn't even listen to him..," I said weakly.

 I then remembered the look on his face when I told him I thought he was like his Dad.

  I can't believe I had said that...

What the fuck was wrong with me? That was beyond heartless.

Chloe sat down next to me and rubbed my back comfortingly. "Just apologize, he'll get over it. I know he will," she said kindly.

 "I don't think he will Chloe...if I were him, I'd never talk to me again," I whispered, as tears started to prick to my eyes. 

I had truly fucked up, big time. 

-----------------------------------------------

It was finally Monday morning, and I had spent the entire weekend alternating between crying into my pillow and spamming Ethan with text messages and voicemails apologizing for how stupid I had acted.

 He hadn't replied or answered to a single one.

At one point, I got so desperate that I even showed up at his house. His mum answered the door with a guilty expression on her face and told me 'he was sick.' We both knew she was lying but I had no other choice but to go back home. 

 All of this confirmed my worse fears - Ethan Blythe was done with me. 

 And I could hardly blame him. I had taken some of his worst insecurities and thrown them back in his face with the sole intention of hurting him. 

Who would forgive someone after they did that to them? I certainly wouldn't. 

Not only had I ruined our friendship, but I had also ruined any potential hope for a romantic relationship with him. 

I had single-handedly sabotaged myself with my own insecurity and paranoia. 

Well done me!

I had a math class with him first period. Tactically, I had decided to show up early in the hope that I would have a chance to talk to him and apologize. As soon as I got into class, I took a seat by the desk he normally sat at. 

The classroom door opened. 

My eyes lit up when I saw Ethan walk in. He paused when he saw me, and his expression changed to become very guarded. He stared right through me as though I wasn't even there and walked over to a seat in the far corner of the room.

  Typical, it was the furthest possible seat away from me. 

I let out a heavy sigh and packed up my stuff before walking across the classroom and taking the seat beside him. He didn't even look up at me as I sat down and seeming very interested in scrolling through his phone.

I cleared my throat awkwardly. "I don't blame you for ignoring me, I'd ignore me too. I just want you to know I'm so, so sorry, Ethan. I promise, I didn't mean any of the horrible things I said to you," I apologized, as I stared at him with desperate eyes. 

He didn't even glance my way and just started humming to himself as though he couldn't hear me. 

Then he delivered the final blow when he fished out his headphones from inside his pocket and put them in his ear. 

I felt a painful sting in my chest at his silent rejection. I know I deserved it, but it didn't make it hurt any less.

Not long after that, I heard the teacher clear her throat, indicating the class was about to start. I looked around and was shocked to see the whole class was full. I hadn't even noticed all the students filtering in slowly over time as I was so focused on Ethan.

It was now thirty minutes into class, and I could barely concentrate for the life of me. I had little to no idea what this class was even about all because of Ethan. I couldn't stare at the board for more than five minutes without taking a glance at him, hoping that he would look my way, but he never did.

 As everyone quietly got on with the textbook, an excellent idea came to mind. 

I knew exactly how to get Ethan to start talking to me again.

"Pssst...Ethan," I whispered.

 He froze slightly and shot me a look of annoyance before he rolled his eyes and focused back on his work. I narrowed my eyes at him before trying again. 

"Ethan," I whispered slightly louder this time as I threw a scrunched-up piece of paper at him. 

I winced as it accidentally hit his face. 

Oops. 

This seemed to get his attention, and he turned around to shoot me a glare. "What?" he whispered angrily. 

"Can I borrow a rubber?" I asked softly.

 I already had a rubber, but I was so desperate for some kind of interaction with him that I was willing to say anything. 

He just let out a heavy sigh before he fished the rubber out of his pencil case and threw it over to my desk. 

"Thanks," I whispered with a smile.

 I inwardly celebrated the fact that I finally managed to get him to say something to me. It wasn't much, but it was a start.

After a couple of minutes, I decided to put my second plan into motion. I tore off a strip of paper from the corner of my book and scribbled down a message before folding it up neatly. I quickly checked the teacher wasn't looking, before chucking it over to Ethan's desk. 

As the paper landed on his desk, he let out a heavy sigh and shot me a very unimpressed look. He tried to ignore it at first, but curiosity must have got the better of him because he picked it and slowly unfolded it.

 I had written 'Do you play soccer? Because you're a keeper.' 

As his eyes read over it, I saw the corner of his lips twitch slightly as though he was fighting the urge to smile.

 I internally squealed, happy that I had finally managed to get him to look somewhat happy. 

He slowly turned to face me with a smile and held up my note, so it was visible. 

Then just like that, his smile dropped from his face, and he quickly and thoroughly ripped up the paper it into tiny shreds. The entire time he did it, he had a completely emotionless look in his eye.

 Well, I'm not going to lie that kind of hurt, but I guess that was only fair. I had metaphorically ripped up his heart with my words.

Not giving up, I ripped another piece of paper out and wrote out my second note. When I was done, I chucked it over to him.

As soon as I threw it, he raised his hand to get the attention of the teacher.

 "Yes, Ethan, is something wrong?" The math teacher asked as she glanced over at him. 

"Yes, there is actually. Mia keeps trying to distract me by throwing notes at me," he said bluntly and loudly, so the whole class could hear.

 I could feel an intense heat rise to my cheek, and I slowly sunk lower in my seat. The teacher made her way over to Ethan and snatched the note from the desk. 

"I'm sure we'd all like to hear what it says," she says as she looked over at me with an evil smirk. 

"I don't think that's necessary, it's private," I stammered out quickly in a panic. 

She ignored me and cleared her throat. "It says, damn if being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged."

 She read it so loudly that I wouldn't be surprised if people in the corridor could hear.

 The whole class burst out into laughter, and at that moment, I wished for death. 

 I turned to look at Ethan, who had the audacity to just innocently go back to his work with a small little smile on his face. 

-------------------------------------

Author's note:

-Chapter 41 all done! Hope you enjoyed watching Mia humiliate herself XD (as per usual) It's always fun to write about lol. 

Now, an important message about what Mia said last chapter...

What Mia said was realistic.  Was it pretty? No, but human emotions aren't always pretty.  In the heat of the moment, a lot of people say cruel things that they later regret. I'm yet to meet someone who hasn't screwed up and said/done something that they later regretted. We all have moments that we aren't proud of, but these moments do not define us as whole, and don't make us undeserving of forgiveness and love. Lashing out when you're hurt is a bad thing to do, but it does not make you a bad person.  So, for future chapters, can we chill out with all the hate-filled attacks at what Mia said. 

 Remember Ethan is far from perfect too, and there's countless examples of things he's done in the name of jealousy and anger that were wrong.  So, I'd appreciate it if you guys would stop putting Ethan on a pedestal and saying Mia doesn't deserve him. Both characters are allowed to make mistakes, not just Ethan. Mia has forgiven Ethan for 6 YEARS worth of teasing/bullying/harassment so just remember this before you're so quick to define her as a bad person who should never be forgiven. 

And if you at any point have left some super long threatening comments, then you yourself are victim to spitting out harsh words in the heat of the moment and you should get the way she acted more than anyone. 

Sorry, for the massive and serious author's note(I hate making them long btw so this is literally giving me anxiety to write) but I had to get this off my chest as I got fairly upset on Thursday morning after I read so many people commenting in a hurtful manner that 'Mia is not worthy of Ethan,' just for a single mistake that she made when she was very upset.  

So long story short, please chill out XD 

On a brighter note, I hope you enjoyed that chapter and thanks for reading!

Next chapter: Monday (6-8PM-UK time)