CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

"So, first, I say something I've never done, and if one of you has done it, you drink, and if none of you has, I drink. Then we take turns." Beth explains the rules to her drinking game to Daryl and Andie. "You really don't know this game?"

"I ain't never needed a game to get lit before." He tells her.

"How did you never play this at parties?" Zoe nudges Andie's foot with her own; they're all sitting in a circle in the middle of the living room now.

"I didn't go to parties."

"That's not true." Theo argues.

"My apologies, Mr. Stalker. Please, remind me." The brunette says, staring at the glass in her hand that she hasn't taken a drink out of.

"Alright, smartass." He shoots her a dirty look. "You told me about the blacklight party that Aiden helped Danny throw."

"I wasn't exactly a willing participant. It was in Derek's loft, where I lived." She glances at him, and he shrugs.

"Still went."

"Yes, I left my bedroom to kick Aiden's ass for snaking my keys."

"That's not all that happened though, is it?"

"It was too loud for party games, dumbass. The bass coming out of the speakers just about blew out the windows... God, I hated Halloween."

"But you still dressed up." He smirks. "Or was it just Aiden's body paint?"

Andie rolls her eyes, shaking her head at his attempt to get a rise out of her. She knows he's trying to get under Daryl's skin with the implication. Especially since he's already told them that she used to sleep with Aiden.

"So, should we start?" Zoe asks, seeing Daryl's irritation as Theo grows smug.

"How does sweet little Beth know this game?" Andie asks. "Is there a darker side to you that you've been holding out on us?"

"My friends played." The blonde tells them. "I watched."

"That's not as interesting."

"Okay, I'll start." She looks at Daryl. "I've never...shot a crossbow. So, now you drink."

"Ain't much of a game." He says before drinking; Andie takes her first drink. "Now Zoe goes. We'll go around the circle."

"I don't know. I've never... I've never been on my own before." Zoe says; Andie, Daryl, and Theo all take a drink.

"Daryl..." Beth looks at him.

"I don't know."

"Just say the first thing that pops into your head."

"I've never been out of Georgia."

"You're not missing much." Andie mutters before taking a drink; Daryl's the only one who doesn't.

"It's your turn." Zoe tells her, and she takes a deep breath as she lets her head rest against the wall behind her.

"I've never been a willing participant in a teenage drinking game." She says, and the three closest to her age drink.

"Were you born this big a loser?" Theo asks.

"Probably."

"Alright, well, that's me." He smiles.

"Hold on, let me prepare myself." Andie sits up, crossing her legs as she leans forward.

"For what?" Zoe asks.

"To punch Theo after I take a drink because his five-year-old ass is about to try pissing me off."

"You make it so easy, sweetheart." He chuckles, and she smiles sarcastically as she looks at him, waiting. "I've never...denied my feelings for someone because I was too afraid to let myself be happy."

"Who says I'm not happy?" She questions. "Or that I wasn't? I don't really know where you think you're going with this one, but I'll just give you what you want so we can move on." She takes a drink.

"You two are children." Zoe shakes her head at them. "Beth, please make them move on."

"I've never..." The blonde starts. "...been drunk and did something I regretted."

Daryl's the only one who takes a drink. "I've done a lot of things."

"I've never...dyed my hair." Zoe says, but none of them drink, so she has to. "Mr. Dixon?"

"I've never been on vacation." He says after a second.

"What about camping?" Beth asks, and he shakes his head.

"No, that's just something I had to learn. To hunt."

"Your dad teach you?" She asks, and he nods. Beth, Zoe, and Theo take a drink, and then he looks at Andie.

"You take issue with that?" Andie asks, seeing that he looks confused.

"Didn't you leave Beacon Hills for a while to spend time with your dad? That wasn't like a vacation?"

Her brow furrows. "Hell no, especially not if my grandfather was there. You think I am the way I am because we were a big, happy, functional family?" She questions. "I'm the bastard child of two idiot teenagers who got into his whiskey cabinet."

"Is that why you didn't drink before?" Beth asks. "Because of your grandfather?"

"No." She shakes her head. "I just never had a reason to drink."

Theo clears his throat. "It's your turn." He tells Andie, and she looks at the moonshine in her hand.

"I've never...had a real, healthy relationship." She says. "Go ahead, Theo, poke at that one." She looks at him as his girlfriend takes a drink.

"I've never purposely sabotaged myself when it comes to the people that I love." He says, and she smirks.

"And who have you ever loved?" Andie questions. "I mean, besides yourself."

"Someone really put you in a mood today." He shakes his head. "You're extra bitchy."

"Maybe we should keep going." Zoe says.

Andie downs the rest of the clear liquid in her cup and then chucks the glass at Theo. He catches it, nodding as he looks at her.

"That's real mature." He says, but she only glares in response.

"Beth?" Zoe looks at her. "Take the attention off of them, please."

"I've never..." The blonde starts, thinking about something to say. "...been in jail. I mean, as a prisoner."

Daryl looks at her, meeting her gaze. "Is that what you think of me?" He questions. It's a fair assessment. Zoe asked for the focus to be pulled from the other two in the room, and Beth's looking right at him.

"I didn't mean anything serious." She tells him. "I just thought, you know, like, the drunk tank. Even my dad got locked up for that back in the day."

"Drink up."

"Actually, Andie needs a refill so she can drink." Theo says, and she shoots him a dirty look.

"Fuck you." The brunette retorts.

"Wait, were you a prison guard before?" Beth asks Daryl.

"No."

"It's your turn again." She tells him, but he's pretty clearly done with this game.

"I'm gonna take a piss." He says as he gets to his feet. He walks to the corner of the room, on the opposite end than they're on, and drops his glass before undoing the button on his jeans.

"You have to be quiet." Beth quickly says, and Andie nods as she looks at Theo.

"Can't hear you! I'm taking a piss!"

"Bad idea." The brunette repeats, and Theo flips her off.

"Daryl, don't talk so loud." Beth says, getting nervous.

"What, are you my chaperone now?" He questions, turning his head to look behind him. He finishes relieving himself and does up his jeans and belt. "Oh, wait. It's my turn, right? I never, uh...never eaten frozen yogurt."

"I stole some once." Andie chuckles. "Tastes better that way."

"Never had a pet pony. Never got nothing from Santa Claus. Never relied on anyone for protection before. Hell, I don't think I've ever relied on anyone for anything!" Daryl continues, and Theo gets to his feet as Zoe makes her way over to Luna, who's starting to sit up.

"Daryl..." Beth shakes her head, feeling bad for offending him.

"Never sung out in front of a big group out in public like everything was fun. Like everything was a big game. I sure as hell never cut my wrists looking for attention!"

"Alright, that's enough." Theo steps in front of his girlfriend as Andie looks over at the blonde. "I get it, she pissed you off. Grow up, asshole."

"Ain't you live for this shit?" He questions as he walks up in front of him. "Pluckin' at people's last nerves, gettin' under their skin."

"You took it too far." He tells him, and then noise outside catches their attention.

"Oh, sounds like our friend out there is trying to call all of his buddies." Daryl turns for the door as the walker snarls and smacks at the wall.

"You're drunk, dumbass. Sit down and shut up."

"Hey, you never shot a crossbow before?" He looks at Beth as he grabs his weapon from where he left it near the front door. "I'm gonna teach you right now."

He tries to get past Theo to get to her, but Andie's between them faster than his drunken mind can register, and she pushes him back a step.

"You're not taking her out there like this." The werewolf says. "You need to calm your ass down right now."

"Calm like you always are?" He questions, looking down at her. "You want me to spend my time on you, right? Let's go bond outside with our friend."

"Daryl—"

"Come on. It's gonna be fun." He grabs her by her arm and drags her toward the door.

"Andie..." Theo's fists clench as he resists the urge to knock Daryl out to sit him down.

"It's fine." She tells him.

Andie shakes free of his hold once they reach the dirt, and he raises his crossbow to put two arrows in the walker that's moving toward them. It's now pinned to a tree as he reloads the bow as quickly as his drunken hands will allow. The brunette looks over to see Theo standing on the porch with Beth right behind him, they're both watching as Daryl goes on his rampage.

"Are you having fun?" Andie questions as he shoots another arrow.

"It's target practice. I'm showing Beth what it looks like to defend yourself."

"You're showing all of us what it looks like to make an ass out of yourself."

"Ain't that what you always do?" Daryl turns to face her. "Vague stories about your life before, shit that don't make no sense. You're not exactly painting a great picture of your family. Or yourself — poor little girl, didn't have nobody to love her. Except the people who sacrifice themselves to save her, just so you can throw it all away on your suicide missions. And talking about boys you did...or didn't do because they were with someone else, not that that always stopped you."

She nods as she looks up at him. "You done yet?"

"Nah, I'm just gettin' started." He starts toward the walker that's still growling where it's stuck to the tree trunk, but a knife whizzes past his head and impales the corpse in the forehead. "What did you do that for? I was having fun."

"Killing them isn't a sport." Andie says as she looks at him. "They were human once. We kill them to survive, nothing else."

"You care about walking corpses, but you can't admit that you give a damn about the people around you?" He questions.

"You think you know me, but you don't know shit." She tells him. "You have no idea what my life was before all this. You don't know why I am the way I am."

"You don't let people know you!"

"And what about you?!" She counters. "Zack tried for months to guess what you did before the world went to shit, but you wouldn't even give him a hint. You wanna judge me, but you're the same. Hell, you're worse! You tell anecdotes about your old life, but you don't let anyone actually know you either. We hear one-off bullshit about your father or about the stupid shit that Merle did. We have him to show us, we don't need stories!"

"The only thing we know about you is the shit Theo says when he's trying to piss you off." He argues. "Don't direct your anger issues at me because the only friend you have in this world is an annoying prick who never shuts up because he's obsessed with your past and the sound of his own damn voice!"

"You want a peek into my brain? You wanna know the beginning of who I am? Huh?" She nods as she stares up into his angry blue eyes. "When I was a kid — not even double-digits — I had my grandfather lean over me, look me in the face, and tell me what a stain I am on the world. I was a child, and I had these hateful words burned into my head. He told me that I was a disgrace to his family and he wished my mother had never had me. He didn't understand how my father, his son, could love the likes of us. He tolerated my existence for his son's sake, but he would never accept me as a part of his family. He would never love me, and given the choice...he'd never lay his eyes on me again if there was any other way... And you wanna know what I did?"

Theo glances behind him as footsteps approach from the house. Merle's walking out onto the porch with Luna close behind, sliding past Zoe as she stares from the doorway. The other two don't notice as they continue to stare each other down.

"I loved him." Andie says, and Daryl's expression softens when his anger subsides enough for his mind to register the tears in her dark eyes. "I sought his approval every day, thinking that I could show him how wrong he was about us. That me and my mother were every bit as good as him and my father. I tried to prove to him that I was worthy of carrying on my father's name, but nothing I did was ever good enough... And then my mother's family was killed in a fire, and he didn't show us a modicum of empathy. Like we deserved to lose so many that we loved. So I became everything he knew I was: a disgrace, a stain. And for years, I didn't let anyone in. Because if my grandfather, my family, my flesh and blood — if he hated me from the moment he learned I existed, then why would anyone ever give a damn about me? So, there you go. Is that what you want to hear, Daryl? You got a peak behind the curtain. Anything you wanna share with the group?" She asks, but he just stands there, too stunned to speak. "No? Didn't think so. You don't know how to make connections any better than I do. You can't let anyone get too close."

"You mean like you do?" He questions. "All the female friends you don't have? All the guys you only let get close enough to sleep in your bed?"

"Are you really still on that?" She asks, the disbelief obvious. "Isaac was abused by his father after his mother and older brother died; he understood what I went through. Aiden had his entire belief system flipped on its head the same as I did; we talked about the people we could become if we let the right people in — and then he died. Brett was a good guy who had something he believed in, and it made him stronger for it; he was teaching me to handle my anger instead of lashing out every time things got too hard. And I knew Theo when we were kids; he was a connection to a part of myself that I lost a long time ago, a piece of me that I wanted back so desperately. Him ending up in my bed was never part of the plan, but we were talking about when we were kids, when we were friends — a time in my life when deciding to trust someone wasn't the scariest thing I could possibly imagine. I could have those guy friends because I could lie to myself and say that it all meant nothing, I didn't have to face that I was trying to heal some part of me that died the day my home burned to the ground. I couldn't do that with the girls in my p—" She scoffs, shaking her head as she turns her back to him.

"You..." A small voice gets their attention, and they all look at Luna. "You're Andie. I remember you from the prison. I was too afraid to talk to you, but...but my papi wanted me to."

"Your dad wanted you to talk to Andie?" Theo glances between the two of them as the girl in question wipes the tears from her cheeks.

"He said he met you once." She tells her, and Andie's nervous gaze meets Merle's for a moment before she returns her attention to the youngest. "He said you could've killed him, but you didn't. You let him live, and he knew that you were a better person than he was. He told me that you were living in a prison, and he told me how to get there. He said that if he ever left and never came back, he wanted me to find you. He said you would keep me safe if he couldn't. He said you were one of the good guys... Do you remember him?"

"I do remember your dad." She walks over and kneels in front of the porch steps, prompting the little girl to move closer. "He could've fought me, but he didn't. He backed down, and he stopped another man from attacking us. He let me save Merle, and we got back to our people to protect them in the prison... Tu papi era un buen hombre." She says, and Luna smiles at her.

"Beth, Zoe, why don't you two take Luna into the bedroom?" Theo suggests. "All three of you should try to get some sleep while we know this place is secure."

"What's the matter, chica?" Merle asks, his eyes on Andie.

"Where's her mother? Was she at the prison?" The brunette asks as she looks up at him, and he shakes his head.

"Martinez didn't have a girl in Woodbury. He just had her."

"I met him one time, for less than sixty seconds... Why would he send his daughter to me?"

"He probably knew he wouldn't survive the Governor, he needed a plan for his little girl once he was gone." He shrugs. "Looks like you saved my life just so I could give you a child."

"Ew. What is wrong with you?" Andie questions, and he starts laughing.

"We should do a perimeter sweep, make sure your screaming match didn't draw any others our way." Theo says, and she nods as she glances at him.

"One of you, both of you — I don't give a shit. Get that glass cleaned up off the floor." She tells the older two. "That little girl is not cutting herself on broken glass soaked in moonshine."

"You got it, mamasita." Merle hums, and she shakes her head at him as she takes her hatchet from Theo's outstretched hand. "Hey, you wanna tell me what happened inside...and out here?"

"Shut up." Daryl grumbles as he shoves past his brother.