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Jimin takes a deep breath as soon as he steps outside. He basks in the cool breeze, and the warmth the fading sun casts on his face. After the suffocation in the dance studio, he needed an escape.

All he wants is to escape.

Running his hands haphazardly through his hair, he almost wishes for a cigarette, alcohol, drugs, anything to help him erase her from his memory. A futile effort to forget everything that happened between them, and move on.

But what is it exactly he has to move on from?

And why is it so hard?

By the time you come out to join him, he is already on the other side of the roof, sitting on the edge of a generator. You take a deep breath before going over to him, knowing full well that you may be the last person he wants to see, but that you are perhaps the only one who he can talk to right now. Perhaps he realizes this too, for when you reach his side, mumbling a feeble greeting he hardly flinches as though he expected you to show up beside him.

"Of course," He mutters bitterly, small confirmation to your earlier assumption, but a hurtful one nonetheless. In other circumstances, you might have left, but for some reason, you can't find it within you to leave him alone.

"Way to be discreet," you scoff instead, making sure you're clear that the statement has affected you. The message is received and as Jimin winces, opening his mouth to apologize or defend himself, you aren't really sure which, you hold up your hand, stopping his sentence in its tracks. "There's no need to explain. I get it."

His eyes meet yours for a moment, and you wonder if he wants to say something to you, a growing sentence growing present on his tongue, but in the end, nothing comes and he turns back to the growing sunset. Gathering the courage to sit beside him, you turn to give him a sideways glance, somewhat worried. You and Jimin never particularly clicked, but he was never cold nor unkind to you, rather it seemed as though he were keeping his distance until he was sure you were someone he would be able to trust. It was quite different from the persona he exuberated onscreen, but you cannot blame him for hiding his insecurities. After all, you aren't much different in retrospect.

"Are you okay?" you ask him, his shoulders tensing as soon as the question leaves your mouth. You sense the sudden change in disposition, and quickly explain yourself, hoping you aren't overstepping your boundaries as much as it seems. "You messed up. That doesn't happen."

Jimin chuckles bitterly as he meets your eyes, the dark, near haunted look within them startling you.

"I am human, you know."

His sentence, while said with a lighthearted temperament, holds more weight than either of you realize at the moment. Because of this, and because of your desire to find a way to ease his mind, you discard the possible anomaly, the broken craving for someone within the spotlight to be seen as human. Instead, you smirk, leaning forward and raising one eyebrow his way incredulously.

"Oh come on, if you were human you'd take it easy on me every once in a while."

Jimin's eyes widen at the outlandish joke for a moment, the spontaneity of the phrase becoming more amusing than the joke, and despite his better judgment, his face breaks into a contagious laugh, causing you to smile in turn. A familiar relief and pride that you managed to bring a smile to his face and ease the tension between the two of you exploding within your chest at the joyous sound. And so you laugh with him, finding a comradery with him at that moment, that you did not imagine finding, especially now.

"Ya!" Jimin manages to reprimand between bursts of laughter, nudging you a bit violently, which only inspires more laughter to explode from within your chest. "I'm not that bad!"

"Are you for real?!" You roll your eyes, steeling yourself for another shove, given the weight of your next retort. "Some days you're worse than Hobi!"

Jimin is so stunned by the gall you must have to insult the "Dance Dictator" so eloquently, that he doesn't even consider reprimanding you this time. Instead, he laughs, an unexpected and joyous laugh that arises from his stomach and plays jovially on his vocal cords before being released into the atmosphere where the clouds have begun to turn their own shade of pinks and oranges, the sun disappearing slowly but surely behind the horizon. For everything that is good and plentiful must soon disappear and replenish before it can return as something new, and it might not be something good, but at least it's something new and it brings forth change that no one is willing to accept, but everyone soon needs to experience.

As you catch sight of this natural but glorious phenomenon and are provided an epiphany of sorts, a kind of serenity that puts you at ease and erases the laughter in the air as though it had not existed in the first place. In the back of your mind, you are reminded of him, the way he looks at you, the colors the sun cast on his face as his eyes held yours, prepared and ready to tell you the innermost parts of his soul, if only you would have opened the door.

"Is it because of her?" Jimin looks towards you as you utter the words, and if you're being completely honest, you didn't expect yourself to say them either. However, you do not regret the words, nor do you take them back. You turn to him, your gaze steady and open, ready for any answer he has to give. "My mom."

For a moment, Jimin is speechless, and as he grasps for words of any kind to reply with, you are able to see everything you need to know. You nearly want to chuckle to yourself. He's so easy to read, especially when it comes to his feelings, but perhaps it is not that he's easy, per se. Perhaps he has merely found himself comfortable enough around you to let down his walls. Whatever the reason, you are grateful for it.

"W-what are you talking about?" He stumbles, quickly turning his face from you as though he could sense your profound intuition, or maybe he knows that whatever you could see on his face at this present moment will give away everything his heart is screaming at him to recognize. A truth that perhaps he is not ready to recognize. "I-I don't...it's not...it's not what you think. I just--"

"I saw your discussion, you know." Your interjection wasn't subtle nor was it supposed to be. You don't wish to hear a mumbled excuse, nor do you want him to beat around the bush, as though he were afraid of how you would react. "It wasn't that hard to miss, and I could tell you were bothered by it."

At the reminder, Jimin goes still.

This morning, he took a car to pick Yen up, as the rest of BTS had been doing throughout the weeks of your training to keep your identity on the down-low and as a form of bonding. It was Jin's suggestion initially, and with BangPD's authorization they had been alternating each week for "pickup duty".

This time, however, Jimin was particularly very lucky for he was offered a moment to speak to Jocelynn on his pickup route. However, the discussion was not a pleasant one, both parties were quite upset with each other and it did not end on a pleasant note either, as you can attest to for Jimin remained completely silent for the duration of the drive.

You have a feeling it has to do with the events of last night, but you cannot recall the reason why. All you know is the tension was high between the two and they hardly spoke once Jocelynn revealed the fact that she was your mother.

"That...that was nothing," Jimin murmurs, nervously fidgeting with his hands in his lap as he stares at the sunset with a determined gaze. You wonder what he's looking for in those clouds, and what they could possibly offer him besides a tale of rebirth and renewal. Or perhaps he is reaching his hand out to grasp an answer, a future where he can find himself happiness.

How long has it been since he's felt happy? True happiness, where you feel as though you are floating in the stars and no one is capable of bringing you down. Somedays, he's wondered if time has tired and nulled the concept of happiness for him, and if he were to find it again, would he even be able to recognize the sensation?

"I just...wish she told me, you know? Then I would have felt less like a fool."

You nod, staring back at the sunset yourself, the pinks and oranges now fading into deep purples and scarlet reds, but as you look at it now, you no longer see a gorgeous canvas. Instead, you see him, just as you see him within everything around you, everything he has touched and everything he has said has engraved itself permanently on your heart to the point where you are unable to even look at the sunset without uttering his name.

"I understand."

Though he has no way of knowing whether she understands or not, he has a feeling she is telling the truth. Something in her voice, and the way she stares at the sun tell him that she isn't lying. And in the back of his mind, he wonders if this is what happened between her and Taehyung. He wonders if this sunset reminds her of him as much as the rain reminds him of Jocelynn.

"But Jimin...what's your relationship with her anyway?" It was simply a question of curiosity, something you had been wondering for a while, but as soon as you meet Jimin's eyes you find you have made an error of some sort.

"Wh-why do you need to know that?!" Jimin manages to sputter between his flushed cheeks and the deafening beat of his heartbeat. You have to restrain yourself from laughing as you see his face, so instead, you turn away, hiding your smile behind your hand in a not-so-subtle gesture. Jimin nearly fumes at the reaction, having half the mind to scold you for the second time that day, but you speak before the insinuation manages to form into a singular thought.

"I probably don't." You lean forward, pulling your legs up to your chest and resting your chin delicately on your knees as though shielding yourself. From what, Jimin does not know. "It feels terrible lying to yourself, trying to excuse your feelings instead of coming to terms with them." You would know, after all, you did it for the longest time, and look where it's gotten you. "I just thought if you came to terms with yours, maybe things would be a bit clearer for you."

"Well, you're wrong," Jimin responds quite decisively, and you look his way, a bit surprised. He's never sounded as fierce as he does right now, almost as though he is upset that you dared to presume his feelings based on the things only you know, not the things lying within his heart. "I'm not confused about anything. She's just...someone I know is all. That's all she is, all she can be."

Perhaps if he hadn't said that last phrase, perhaps if he wasn't so clearly denying something so clear to everyone else besides him, you may have believed him. You may have apologized for getting the wrong idea and would have moved on with the knowledge that he and your mother were acquaintances and nothing more.

However, he did say that phrase.

And so you scoff at his distinction, standing and moving to walk away, and you probably would have made it quite far if he did not stop you, his hand quickly enclosing your wrist and holding you back.

"What? What is it?"

You turn to him, clear annoyance written on your face, and he blinks in mute surprise, quickly letting go of your wrist as though that were the root of your vexation.

"You wouldn't feel like a fool if she were just 'someone you know' now would you?"

At his silence and the look on his face, your heart softens a bit in pity. He really doesn't know what his heart is telling him, or perhaps he is too afraid to accept it given the pain the emotion has given him before. You can understand how pain can destroy the concept of love, turn it into something scary, nearly unable to fathom without you hurting in the end.

But that doesn't mean you have to forget what it feels like.

It doesn't mean you have to give up on it.

"Maybe you care about her more than you thought, have you ever considered that?"

But no matter how hard you want to help him see what's so clearly there, he is the only one who can answer those questions himself. So you pat him softly on the shoulder, giving him a slight smile before heading back inside, the sunset nearly fading entirely behind the horizon and leaving behind a dark starlit sky in its wake, and leaving Jimin behind to his thoughts, a realization now sparking within him and giving birth to the start of a furnace within. One that has not been lit for such a long time. Unknown to him that across the city, Jocelynn sits in her house, staring at the glimmering screen of her phone and at the contact that lies within. A number which she has considered calling time and time again, but never found the courage within herself to do so, and so for the thousandth time, she debates whether she should delete it or call him as he so desperately requested. And for the thousandth time, she finds herself unable to do either, and so she sets the phone down before standing to busy herself with anything that will take her mind off the man who touched her heart in ways she is too afraid to recognize.

And so, the device sits obediently discarded, in front of a lovely photograph of her two beautiful daughters, a name still present on the screen even after she leaves. A name quite plainly entered, but bearing the weight of two broken hearts on its existence.

Park Jimin. 

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sorry this is late, everyone but I've come down with a bit of a cold, so it took me a while to finish this chapter up. however, i hope you enjoy!

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