SEOKJIN POV.

While he was hugging me so tightly, I played with his hair. He was shaking. I pulled away from him and gently grabbed his face in my hands. His eyes were red, cheeks puffy.

It wasn't him. He's got an image of a strong, smart and independent man who's usually right and who gets what he wants but seeing him like this, like a silhouette of a brolen boy, broke my heart even more. He won't let his emotions appear; he rather cares about other people. Due to what I've heard about him, he's the only person who let people cry on his shoulder and also the one who gives others advices. People see him like someone who'll be always here for them when they will need him but they don't realise he's a human being as well.

I knew a lot about him even though we were together for more than a month. He's nice, very polite, smart, handsome, modesty and he always knows what to do or say. He also gets what he wants. And I love him. I love every little thing about him. His smile or how his eyes shine when he's happy. His voice and how he always makes sure I'm okay. His hands and how he always pulls me closer to him. How dominant he is and how his touch makes me feel tons of feeling what I didn't know they actually exist. In some ways, he simply made me fell in love with him. I was wrong. I thought I won't be able to fall in love with anyone after what happened.

"I'm sorry, this doesn't usually happen to me." he smiled, wipping his tears with a tissue.

"It's okay, Namjoon. Tears make us say what we aren't able to say." I said and grabbed his hand.

We sat down on his couch and he intertwined our fingers together. I looked at him. I knew he wanted to say something but he just sighed loudly. After that, he bit his lower lip and looked at our hands - his famous smirk appeared on his face for a few seconds.

"What are you thinking about, Namjoon?" I asked him.

"I'm thinking about many things, Jin. For example, how easy is to lose someone in a minute? How happiness can disappear by a blink of an eye? How strong we can we be and how pain can change us? How words can hurt someone? Will we be able to find answers on these questions?" he sighed and looked at me.

"What happened, Namjoon?" I asked him again.

"Many people die every single day and many people are born. We should be use to death but somehow, it's still really hard to accept it. My dad-" His voice broke when he said. I was queit, I patiently waited for his answer. 

"He's in the hospital right now. He collapsed at work this morning. They saved him but he hasn't said anyone that he's dying. He has got a brain tumor, it has grown a much bigger and there's no chance of saving him. Sooner or later, he's gonna die." he said and his voice was still shaking.

"Namjoon, I'm-"

"No, don't say anything. Don't pity me. It's okay. It's just... He's my dad. My hero, my inspiration, my everything. He gave me so much and now I'm gonna lose him. I just.. I can't-" he paused and I pulled him closer to me.

"I'm here, Namjoon. Do you hear me? I'm here and I won't leave you alone in this situation. You aren't alone, okay? You aren't alone." I repeated over and over.

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I'm really sorry for being inactive for so long because of a school. I really missed you all. I hope you are all doing okay. I will fix mistakes tomorrow, now I'm really tired for it. Goodnight/Have a nice day. 🌙💕