NAMJOON POV. 

Even that Hoseok's driver gave me a lift back home, I couldn't find the courage to unlock the door and stepped inside of my apartment, seeing him sleeping on a couch while he's been waiting for me, as always. I couldn't look into his eyes, I just couldn't do that. I've realised how much pain he's been through because of me. How much I've hurt him by my selfish behavior, by arguing with him, by never being the best boyfriend. These thoughts were slowly killing me, and yet I couldn't tell it to anyone. 

After twenty minutes of walking around my neighbourhood, I went inside and finally opened the door. To my surprise, the TV was still turned on. I quietly tiptoed inside and found him there. He was sitting on a kitchen counter, drinking a cup of coffee and wearing his favourite loose grey sweatpants and white t-shirt. His hair were still wet from the shower and they weren't blonde anymore, he went back to his natural colour. I liked that. After a few seconds, he turned his gaze on me and I gulped. 

"I'm tired, Namjoon. I'm tired of waiting for you to come home. I can't wait any longer for you, Namjoon. You know I can't. Do you even realise what you've put me through? All this fights, shouting, crying, breaking things and then, reconciliation. All these nights when you've fucked me senseless and told me that you love me, that you're sorry for you've done and how you'll change but nothing has happened. In the morning, you're gone. You go to work two hours earlier just to avoid me. You don't call me or text me during the day, only in the evening when I want to know where you are. You're like a ghost, Namjoon. A ghost, invisible human being, cold and heartless person, whatever you want." he told me and his voice cracked. 

"Baby, I-" 

"No, don't baby me anymore. I don't wanna hear another arguments, Namjoon. You know I'm right." he sighed and placed the cup of coffee on the table next to him, then he stepped closer to me. 

"Look into my eyes, Namjoon. Look into my eyes and tell me you love me. Tell me you want me so stay." he said and looked at me, but I couldn't even open my mouth. It was like I completely lost my voice. 

"Woah, you never cease to amaze me, Kim Namjoon. Have I ever told you that?" he whispered, amused, but I knew he was trying to cover the pain in his voice. He's as transparent as paper - completely unable to hide his feelings and emotions. He turned his back to me and wanted to walk away from me, but I grabbed his wrist to stop him.

"I've already told you-" he opened his mouth but I pulled him closer to me and kissed him. He tried to push me away many times but I was stronger than him and he knew that. 

"Baby please don't leave me." I mumbled between kisses and he moaned, as I moved closer to his neck, where I left a visible mark.

"Please, let me show you how much you mean to me." I whispered and he nodded. 

Without saying anything else, he jumped on me, wrapped his legs around my waist and I carried him to our bedroom. 

____

Good evening, loves. I've got four things to say:
1) I want to apologize for not posting at all! It's been really hard for me to find an inspiration and I've got some other things to do besides writing. I hope you understand it. 
2) Summer is coming so expect a lot of new fanfictions I've got already prepared. (Hope you'll support them just like the others)
3) I want to prepare you for the fact I'm going to release only two other chapters so bring some tissues and popcorn, it's gonna be wild. 
4) I love you all so much, hope you're all doing okay and that you take care of yourself. Have a nice day/night. ❤️❤️❤️