This feeling

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I wanna slash my wrists and then come crying to you, but I can't because I will be ashamed and you will be disappointed and that hurts more than whatever feeling this is.
I try to listen to happy music but it doesn't work now, but I wish it did. I wanted to talk all night with you but you said that you were tired, so I said night.
We talked about nonsense and even though it was just nonsense, it mattered to me.
Some say that they were infinite. I just want to say I wasn't expandable to you.

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