OK, first thing's first: I'm not dead.

Second thing's second: I took a long time to post since I got entangled with another fandom, and I just had to write about one of their almost-canon-but-irritatingly-isn't ships (also gay, don't worry). And that thing took me like a week to write since I was on a trip and I couldn't write often (but I did gain the ability to write during the day! Yeeeeehaw!). Anyway, I also have other things to write about (per requests and my idiotic mind's accepting challenges left and right; also writing another story that I won't publish b/c I haven't gotten the entire plot drafted yet on a timeline - not Komahina btw), so some of the chapters may be delayed.

Third thing's third: Because I love you all (and also because I'm trying to be an AO3 wannabe), I'm doubling the length of the chapters, and possibly, possibly, tripling it. So, yay! Then again, that means that I'll be updating within intervals of one week (I gotta get it edited and beta'd too).

Fourth thing's fourth: Well... you see... uh... I kinda procrastinated over the first week of summer and I didn't exactly plan out the plot step by step as I had for Death's Harvest, so the updates may be even slower than I expect...

Thank you for your cooperation! Feel free to leave comments or votes!

________________________________________________________________________________

The streets of this so-called "Wonderland" was bustling with mystifying creatures that Hajime couldn't quite make out. There were ones with tentacles; ones with fly eyes; ones with multiple eyes- Seriously, what was with these eyes? All Hajime wanted to do was go home, but with Nagito dragging him along the streets like this, he doubted that he would be able to escape his clutch. 

To top it all off, his attire was gaining looks of absurdity from these creatures (or at least he thought it was his clothes; it was better to assume that than any of his other features). Nagito had a tight grip around his wrist as they weaved past crowds and stalls with monsters yelling out the products they sold or the sales price. 

Hajime rubbed a hand over his face, groaning internally as he almost tripped on one of those darned tentacles again. How the hell did he get himself into this mess? Sure, he had done many ridiculous actions in his lifetime (partially thanks to Fuyuhiko and Kazuichi) to get into a truckload of trouble, but all he did to get into this world was simply standing outside of a freaking casino. And then before he knew it, that ominous dealer he had met before bites him in the neck. Like, really? What was he, some sort of vampire? 

Hajime had tried pinching himself multiple times, but to much of his dismay, this was definitely real and not a wild dream of his. 

"Are you hungry?" 

Hajime nearly walked into Nagito when he halted abruptly in front of a store.

"Wha-?"

"Are you hungry?" Nagito repeated again, this time with a bit more volume.

First, this guy shoves a sugar cube - two in fact - down his throat, and now he's asking if Hajime wants anything to eat? Then again, Nagito was being surprisingly polite, and to reject his offer would make Hajime look like a douchebag. But at the same time, all he wanted was to go home, not to a restaurant or whatnot. Heck, he had no idea what food they served.

"I want to go home," Hajime snapped, hoping that Nagito wouldn't mind his rude personality.

"Of course you do. But won't you have a meal with me before you go?" Nagito opened the door, placing a welcoming hand near the darkness, beckoning Hajime to enter.

Hajime hesitated when he stared into the vortex of darkness. Nagito was untrustworthy to the maximum, his eyes half-lidded as a sly smile stretched across his lips. Hajime could be walking into a trap for all he cared.

"No. I said I wanted-" He was cut off by his stomach's growling, and he mentally cursed it for being on cue. 

"See? You sure you don't want to eat?" Nagito's voice dripped with honey, caressing Hajime's mind; luring him in like fish for bait. 

Hajime's breath hitched, and he almost - almost - gave in to the melodic voice of the suspicious white-haired man. 

"Promise me you'll bring me back once this is over," Hajime drawled. His brain was all in for it; had become a prisoner to Nagito's words. But his heart thought otherwise, for it knew that there was something sketchy about the situation and the dealer who had thrown him into it. 

"Promise~" Nagito singsonged while Hajime hesitantly walked through the doorframe.

At once, a frigid gale of wind blew past him, its bony fingers digging through his skin, seeming to trace circles in his soul. Hajime shuddered involuntarily, his senses depleting due to the muck that surrounded him when he had entered. It was an uncomfortable feeling, having your hearing muffled and your sense of smell blocked. His eyes were drowned in a black substance and a slimy, wet feeling slipped past his skin as he proceeded farther into the tunnel. 

Hajime nearly tripped when the front of his shoes came into contact with the edge of a doorframe. Instinctively, his arm reached outward, pushing open the door and stumbling into the embrace of a warm room. 

Music flowed softly through his ears, placing his nerves at ease. 

"Doesn't it feel nice here?" Nagito spoke from behind him, patting invisible specks of dust off of his suit. 

"Yeah..." Hajime felt himself saying. It truly was a cozy place, better than a fireplace and a steaming cup of hot chocolate on a December night. 

"Why don't you take a seat? I'll order something for us both." Nagito eased Hajime onto one of the countertop stools before sitting next to the brunet. 

"Don't you have to get to the Queen or something?" 

"Huh? Oh, that? Don't worry about it. I have a tendency to be late all the time."

"But-"

"Sh. Eat your food." 

A plate of curry was placed in front of him, its delicious aroma causing Hajime to drool subconsciously.

"Don't worry," Nagito pushed the spoon toward Hajime, "it's not poisoned if you're wondering. See?" He took a bite of his own dish, swallowing it before urging Hajime to do the same.

True, the curry did smell like the same ones he had back home, but a nagging feeling at the back of his mind still didn't accept the fact that there was nothing suspicious about all this.

Screw it, he thought. Hajime took a bite of the curry, shuddering slightly when the flavors burst onto his tongue.

"Delicious, isn't it?" Nagito chuckled, "It's the best one in this world."

Hajime had to agree. It was a matter of seconds before he consumed the entire dish, his stomach satisfied with the meal. 

"Done yet?" A childish voice came from behind the counter as a girl with an orange kimono appeared in front of Hajime. 

"Ah, Hiyoko, thanks for the meal," Nagito said, placing several gemstones in her opened palm.

The girl, as Hajime noted, was actually a fox; a kitsune to be precise. She had fair blonde hair in the shape of a curve, with pale orange ears protruding from her head. Her kimono was dusted with petite white flowers adorning the orange fabric as a light green sash encircled her waist. The kimono wrapped around her body, splitting in the middle at her knees. Her feet wore sandals that were made of pure wood. Her sleeves and the back of her collar were laced with white fluff while a tail with the same shade of orange as her ears wagged behind her. Her smile was hidden behind her elaborate gradient pink to white fan, but Hajime could see mischief dancing in her orange eyes. 

What was most remarkable, however, was the cloverleaf underneath Hiyoko's left eye, right on her cheekbone. Hajime sneaked a glance at Nagito, and surely enough, the albino didn't have one. Hajime opened his mouth to ask, but Hiyoko interrupted with a light voice. 

"You're welcome," Hiyoko muttered, eyeing Hajime from beneath her lashes. "Where's your mark, by the way?"

"My mark? I concealed it with what humans call 'makeup'."

Hiyoko looked doubtfully at Nagito, but averted her eyes when she asked, "Is this the one?"

"Yes."

"Same time tonight?" 

"Yes."

"Very well," Hiyoko closed her hand, turning around and vanishing into the shadows. 

"Thank you again," Nagito dipped his hat slightly, taking Hajime by the wrist again. "I'll see you tonight." 

Hajime followed Nagito to the black vortex again, his mind trying to grasp the point of the conversation.

"Oh, before you go," Hiyoko spoke again right before Nagito stepped into the portal.

"Yes?"

"Are you sure he's the right one? I don't feel much potential..."

Nagito smiled, pushing Hajime into the portal before walking in himself. "Have some faith in me, would you? I'm never wrong."

Hiyoko snorted, and then all was silent. 

"Wha-?" Hajime looked at Nagito for some kind of explanation, but the light had disappeared and he was enveloped in the same oozing darkness as before. Trudging his way out of the portal, Hajime gasped when the cool air of the outside world hit his skin. 

"Come on, Hinata," Nagito stated without any formalities, "time to get going." 

"You promised to take me back home," Hajime growled. 

Nagito's jade eyes seemed to gleam when he looked at Hajime from the corner of his eyes and the same uncomforting vibe that Nagito had radiated when Hajime first met him came back to haunt him. 

"Oh, how naive of you," Nagito laughed darkly, turning around to face Hajime, his eyes turning into slits, "Don't you know anything about this world? Oh, wait. I forgot. You just came here."

"You promised, you piece of filth." A surge of hatred bubbled within his stomach, hot white and blinding. 

"Rule one," Nagito lifted up a finger, which taunted Hajime to the point of having the urge to bite it off, "never trust anyone in this world. Not even if they ensure your safety." 

"Number two," Nagito lifted another finger, "everything, from contracts to warranties, are created and compromised using card games. Yes, I did say I promised, but you never sealed the deal with me."

"How the hell was I supposed to know?! You're the one who tossed me here without a proper explanation!" 

"I'd expected you to catch on fairly quickly. Your actions have lowered my standards for you," Nagito clicked his tongue, his disappointment slicing through Hajime like a butcher knife. 

"I-"

"Maybe Hiyoko was right," Nagito mused, "You're not exactly what I had in mind." 

"What?"

Nagito waved him off, taking him by the wrist again. "Never mind that for now. Just enjoy your stay. It's not like you can do anything to go back to your world anyway." He smiled, baffling Hajime more with his impromptu mood swing. 

"But-"

Nagito placed a finger to his lips, silencing the brunet. Hajime trailed after Nagito, once again helpless to the man who had kidnapped him against his will. As Hajime passed the people (if you can deem them people, that is, despite their traits) of this world, his eyes caught the strange markings on each of their faces, each on the same place as Hiyoko's mark was. There was an abundant amount of diamonds, each filled by a deep black. Almost no one had a cloverleaf similar to Hiyoko's, which piqued Hajime's curiosity. 

Diamonds and clovers, huh? Where had he seen those before? Maybe... on the cards in a deck? So if he went by the order of the suits, it would be diamonds, clubs, hearts, then spades? Thus, Hajime concluded that these symbols represented where the people around him were on the social hierarchy. Diamonds were undoubtedly the peasants or the commoners, whereas clubs were most likely the people who worked under the monarchy. Hearts were probably the nobles and the highest suit could definitely speak for itself.  

"Hey! Hey, you there! With the strange white shirt!" 

Hajime snapped out of his daze, peering over his shoulder. 

"Me?" He pointed at himself, stopping in the center of the street. 

"Yeah, you!" A short man beckoned with his hand, "Come over here."

Don't trust anyone in this world. Nagito had said with unwavering authority. 

"No thanks," Hajime replied hastily, turning back to search the crowd for Nagito. 

"Oh, come on," Hajime stiffened as a meaty hand seized his arm, "How much are you willing to pay for that tie?"

Hajime stared down at the smaller man, his heart pounding in his chest. Where was Nagito when you actually needed him? 

"I-It's not for sale," Hajime attempted to tug his arm from the man, but the grip around his arm tightened to the extent where Hajime felt as if his bone was about to break. Hajime accidentally let his expression falter, exposing a wince at the unrelenting grasp on his limb.  

"Surely, you're willing to sell it for a decent amount of gestunes?" The smaller man prompted, opening his palm. "Eh? What about it? How about 10 gestunes for that?"

"I said, no thank you-"

"Boy," the man darkened his gaze and an ill-disposed aura began to rise out of his pores, "10 gestunes is a generous offer. I suggest you take it before you regret it." His smile leaked with all the evil in the world, his fangs glinting in the sunlight. 

Hajime's breath caught in his throat when the tips of his fingers ran cold due to the poor circulation in his bloodstream. His eyes darted nervously amongst the crowd, hoping that someone would save him from this situation. No one did. 

"I ne-need to go," Hajime laughed in broken intervals, silently praying for Nagito to come. 

"Not until I make a deal with you."

"Excuse me," a pale hand was placed on the man's arm, its nails digging into the flesh, "I believe he said no."

Oh, thank god. Hajime heaved a sigh at the voice of his savior. 

"Oi! What do you think you're doing?!" The man glared upward only to falter. The grip on Hajime's arm loosened, and instantly, the blood rushed back to his fingertips. 

"That's my question," Nagito's voice changed into more of a growl. "I suggest you let go of my subordinate here, or I won't hesitate to break your arm." 

Hajime watched, his relief turning into an immense amount of fear as Nagito's lips curled upward, revealing his fangs. His usual jade eyes turned into the shades of the clouds in a storm, blazing with intense lightning. 

"Piss off," the man spat, desperately trying to mask his fear. 

It was only then that Hajime felt the presence of the deadly monster hidden under the pale skin of the mysterious dealer. With a frail body and a soft voice, Nagito could deceive anyone he wished, making them think that he was a weakling when in truth, he was a rampaging storm, bottled up by a simple cork he could unplug at any given time. 

"Is that how you treat your superiors?" Nagito cocked an eyebrow, his smirk widening. The man whimpered, whimpered, as Nagito's nails dug further into his skin, the flesh around it turning a dark shade of red. 

With his thumb, Nagito rubbed against his left cheekbone, exposing a red cloverleaf. At the appearance of the marking, the man recoiled from Hajime, his eyes now wide with panic.  

"Go," Nagito simply commanded, kicking dust into the man's face before he scrambled to his knees and ran like there was no tomorrow.

"Hey, you okay?" Nagito faced Hajime, taking his arm in his hands. 

Hajime could only stare at Nagito in horror at the counterpart of himself he had shown. He was scared of Nagito. Terrified even. His body was paralyzed and the pain in his arm subsided as he zoned out. What else was Nagito hiding? His split personality made the tiny ball of confidence in Hajime's chest shrivel up.

"We're going to need to put some ice on that," Nagito inspected his arm, then with a gentle tug, he lead Hajime out of the market and into another glistening forest. This one was different, with water droplets suspended in midair, just above their heads. The blue leafed trees were laced with cobwebs that caught the sunlight in their wake, reflecting scattered rainbows into the droplets. And, of course, there were more mushrooms that glowed an incandescent blue and purple. Adorning the bushes next to the pathway were - again - white roses that stood out in the blue. 

Nagito stepped over to a tree, one in which its branches spread out as if to hug the entire forest. The dealer tapped his foot near the base of the tree and miraculously, the ground opened in a small circle, revealing another rabbit hole.

"In you go," Nagito smiled, his hand placed at the mouth of the hole. 

"Where are you taking me?" Hajime asked skeptically while staring into the hole as black as the one before. 

"Too many questions. Don't you trust me?"

"Not since you broke your 'promise' to bring me back to my world."

"Well, I did save you from being a hostage to a sales dealer, so at least repay your debt," Nagito mused.

As much as Hajime didn't want to agree with Nagito, the dealer posed a fairly good point. He had no knowledge of anything in this world, didn't know how it worked, and there was no one he could actually trust to bring him back. He had no choice but to stick with this white-haired man for now.

With a deep breath, Hajime slid down the tunnel, his eyes meeting black the farther he traveled. Surprisingly enough, he could feel air brushing past his skin. The problem was, they were in a tunnel leading underground. How could there possibly be any air underground? Then again, this world was magical, and magic defies all rules of science. 

Hajime landed with a thud in front of a large estate, surrounded by the same blue trees he had seen before he entered the tunnel. They were embellished with the same water drops and cobwebs, with the corresponding white roses at its side. A fountain sat in the middle of the tinted blue lawn, spewing out frozen water. 

Hajime could merely gape at the sight of the mansion that lay before his eyes. 

"That's where I live," Nagito adjusted his hat, then proceeded to help Hajime stand up, "It's pretty large compared to the miniature buildings you've seen, right?"

Hajime nodded, unable to form any words. The mansion was three times as large as the ones he'd seen on television, and instead of electricity, it used flames to light the inside of the house. 

"Let's treat your injury, shall we?" Nagito opened the gate, granting Hajime access to his home. 

"Are all houses like this in Happy Havoc?" Hajime gawked at the elegant double doors lined with gold. 

"Some of them are, like only two to three. The ones for the nobles are smaller and the commoners' housing is as small as one of those... what does your kind call it? Oh, yeah. An apartment."

"Are you a noble then?"

"I work for the Queen if you forgot. I'm an official." Nagito snapped his fingers together and the idle lanterns at the sides of the corridor burst to life. 

"Then why aren't you going to the palace right now? The Queen did call for you."

"Ah, yes, she did. But she said as soon as possible. It isn't possible for me to answer the call right now." 

Hajime admired Nagito's level of audacity to defy his superiors but said nothing about it. As they continued through the corridor, Hajime began to catch sight of strange things.

"A cup of tea for you?" Nagito offered, placing a teacup in Hajime's hands.

"Wha-?"

A teapot floated in front of the brunet, dipping as it poured the steaming liquid into his cup. Nagito murmured a 'thank you' as the pot filled his own cup, sipping it before tapping his foot on the ground. The doors in front of the duo opened, revealing a luxurious living room filled with antique furniture. 

"Have a seat. I'll get some ice for your injury." Nagito disappeared behind a curtain of crystals, leaving Hajime to the empty room. In the far corner, a grandfather clock ticked softly while a small dustpan and broom - by themselves due to magic, Hajime thought - worked along the walls. 

"Oh, hi," Hajime's gaze fell upon the seat next to him as a white rat scampered toward him. "You live here?"

It was stupid, asking the rat if he lived here. Hajime scoffed at himself for talking to an animal; a rat, nonetheless. 

"Ugh, I'm so stupid. This place is messing with my head."

"No, he can talk, actually." 

Hajime nearly jumped off the couch when Nagito swiftly entered the room, carrying a small cloth filled with ice. With a squeak, the rat ran across the room and up Nagito's shoulder onto the top of his hat. Nagito handed the creature half of a biscuit, which it accepted gratefully.

"He can?"

"Well, of course! It's Happy Havoc. Anything can happen."

"Even a rat talking?"

The white rat let out a loud squeak, its tail waving wildly behind it. It bared its teeth at Hajime, ready to pounce.

"Oh, dear. Now he's offended."

"Offended?"

"He's a white dormouse, not a rat. A rat is inferior to his race."

"Does he have a name then?" Hajime pressed the ice onto his arm, permitting the frigid temperature to cool his skin.

"Kokichi Ouma."

"Why doesn't he talk then, if he has the ability?"

"You see, he could talk. It's just that he's been placed under a curse I'm trying to remove as we speak."

"You remove curses?"

Nagito shrugged. "I'm the Mad Carder. People come to me with their problems, and I solve them. Well, most of them at least. No guarantees. However, there is someone better than me at removing curses, but she's on the other side."

"On the other side?"

"Nevermind that for now. I have to leave or I'll get into trouble."

"Don't tell me to brush it off so easily! I have the right to know things about this world if you're not going to take me back."

"Sh. I'll explain everything later if I have the time. If I don't leave now, Her Majesty will send Mikan to find me, and if she does, you will be found. You wouldn't dare gamble with that risk, would you?"

Hajime stayed silent, his lips drawn in a tight line. Nagito simply chuckled at his soundless reply. 

"That's what I thought. Anyway, make yourself at home! Feel free to explore the place. There aren't any forbidden places or whatnot. It's not a fairytale or anything. Just be informed," Nagito's eyes turned into slits, "you're my guest here. Your privileges extend to such a limit. You're the second person I've given permission to wander around my abode. To flirt with these rules will cost you dearly."

Nagito snapped his fingers and the white suit and hat he wore were replaced by a green coat that fell to his ankles, its sleeves stopping at the elbow to allow a ruffle of light gray fabric to flow down to his wrists. The back of the collar was folded outward and on his shoulders sat white shoulder pads. Inside the coat, Nagito wore a white collared shirt with a red piece of fabric encircling his waist. Instead of a tie, a red piece of frilled cloth descended from the collar to the middle of his chest. His pants were baggy, tucked into high combat boots in which the top was styled like a jester's hat. 

With a tip of his forest green hat, the Mad Carder disappeared in a swirl of poker cards. 

The dormouse, Hajime's only form of a companion, had left with Nagito. Sighing, Hajime rose from the couch, rubbing the back of his neck. What was he supposed to do now? Nagito had said that he could wander the halls as much as he desired, but he doubted that he wouldn't get lost. 

Exiting the room, Hajime chose a hallway to explore (right, he chose, since it was the least shady in his opinion). For some odd reason, blue butterflies were lined against the walls, and they didn't bother to stay when Hajime stepped on the red rug. 

And-

Oh, hell. 

What the heck was that thing?

Sunlight flooded the room Hajime had discovered, illuminating the silver bars of a staircase. Well, it was technically a staircase, if one could call it so. Actually (Hajime was certainly dumbfounded now; there was no rational justification for this so-called staircase), there were multiple stairs, reaching both upward and downward; left and right. The stairs, per se, were completely mediocre, but what astonished Hajime the most was its formation. There were stairs on both sides of the structure as if one could defy the laws of physics when using them.

And if Hajime stood corrected, it was the only way up and down this mansion. Although he hadn't bothered to explore the other side of the estate, Hajime decided - like the imbecile he was; how did he even get past three years of college, yet high school? - he would endeavor to climb the damned thing.

Hastily, he walked back the other way to the other end of the corridor, checking if the stairs were the only way to ascend and descend the building. To his displeasure, the room at the end of the hallway was the kitchen. The pots and pans were already cooking something delicious, the phantom hands of magic instructing the objects what to do. 

Hajime checked all the other rooms, but most of them were for guests or storage. With a click of his tongue, Hajime returned to the sun-filled room. The brunet could visit the east and west wings of the building, but he couldn't seem to find any passageways that lead there. 

So, like the reasonable person he was, Hajime started off upright on the baffling flight of stairs. It wasn't all that bad, he thought. It was like walking up a normal staircase, despite all the sharp corners along the way. 

It wasn't after five minutes did Hajime notice that he was walking upside down. 

"What the hell?! Wait, what?!" His voice echoed around the isolated area when he saw the other pair of stairs above him facing his direction. Normally, one would see the bottom (the flat part) of the staircase when ascending upward. However, in Hajime's case (his eyes were either deceiving him or the room was casting an illusion), the stairs above him were facing downward. 

"Oh, dear lord," he breathed, sprinting the opposite direction from where he came from. "Who the hell invented this place?!"

Hajime had no clue where he was going even if he was running back to his starting point. Every time he looked up, he would see stairs upside down, all of them seeming to reach to the sky. Every time he looked down, he would see an endless spiral of white and silver, and of course, more stairs. 

Hajime ran up (at least he thought he was traveling up; nothing seemed to make sense anymore at this point), desperately trying to find the floor again. He even jumped off the railing to descend, but the bottom of the structure was nowhere in sight. 

Hajime gave up when he noticed that he was running sideways, however that may have occurred. 

"Stupid stairs, stupid world, stupid Nagito," Hajime groaned as he sat down on one of the steps. "I just want to go home."

He could literally hear Nagito's voice in his head, mocking him about how he expected more of him, and if he couldn't even travel through this simple piece of construction, he was a disappointment. But, what was the point anyway? He had always been a disappointment, a disgrace to society. All boring and normal and average and mediocre and common. He had no talent, no passion, no nothing. He wasn't even sure why Nagito chose him, the lowest of everyone in his world.

There was nothing he could do here, nothing that could benefit Nagito and his friends. He was useless, as much as his friends keep telling him not to call himself. All he had was confidence, but even that couldn't move a building. 

Hajime almost laughed at how ridiculous the situation seemed. He was stuck in a fairytale world, in a Mad Carder's (whatever that title was) mansion, on a flight of stairs. There was no way out and yet, he was hosting himself a pity party. He was such a worthless human being. 

Eh. There was no point in trying anymore. He should just give up.

Laying sideways on his hip, Hajime closed his eyes, allowing the blissful feeling of sleep to consume him. 

________________________________________________________________________________

Didn't reach my goal, but cheers anyway. I'm getting closer at least UwU.