Chapter 8: Jetfire

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With Wheelie and Simmons on their side, Sam, Mikaela, Leo, Oliver, Barry, Cisco, Kara, and Sara head off to Washington to find an old Transformer who can translate the language of the Primes. They reach to the Smithsonian Air and Space Museum. Simmons looks at the building and with a smile on his face.

"Smithsonian Air and Space Museum. Land of dreams in there. All I ever wanted to be is an astronaut." Simmons said, "Hold those." He rips off his pants and replaces them with khakis, "What? I wear them when I'm in a funk. So does Giambi, Jeter. It's a baseball thing. Okay Watches synchronized, Sharp mind and empty bladder. You get caught, demand an attorney and don't ever say my name." He gives them a pill."Okay take one of these pills. Slip it under your tongue. It's the high-concentrate polymer they put in Oreo cookies. Tricks the polygraph every time. Okay. Now, let's get this show on the road." He pulls out a taser and Leo freaks out.

"Whoa,whoa, no, listen, I can't do this." He said.

"Yes." Simmons answered.

"I'm not some alien bounty hunter, guys. I'm not gonna do this. Guards have guns. I don't want to die."

"Kid. Kid. Kid. Kid, kid, kid." Simmons grabs Leo, "You compromise this mission, you're dead to me. Now look into my eyes and tighten up that sphincter."

Inside the museum, people are leaving the building.

"The museum is now closing." The announcer said.

Leo burst from the bathroom with his pants down.

"Yo, baba! Bad news, bro! Ran out of toilet paper! You got any out here? Please tell me you do?"

"Sir! I suggest you get in there. The museum is closed!" The security guard said.

"Listen, man, I understand that, but as you can see, this is important. All right? Thumper dumper. I got to go. All right."

-"Sir, you are a grown, naked man around children. Pull your pants up and exit building."

"I'm not going anywhere." Leo heads back in the bathroom stall with the guard.

"You got that paper, right, sir? You should be embarrassed. This is a family museum, sir."

Leo readies the taser. "Come on..." He tases the guard in the hand and falls to the ground. Leo gets out of the stall but he tases himself and falls to the guard. Simmons then enters wearing a pilot outfit.

"What is going on here?" he asked before sees them in an awkward position.

"How many times-can you get tased in the nuts before you can't-have-kids? Huh? You know?" Leo asked.

"You are an amateur, man. A rank amateur. We just downed five guards. Five guards. Get your stuff and get out of here. Get out of-"

They meet up with Sam, Mikaela, Oliver, Barry, Cisco, Kara, and, Sara.

"Give me a second here."

"I got to get the tracker, all right?"

Mikaela opens the box and Wheelie comes out.

"Be good." She warns him.

"I'll claustrophobic." He said.

"Look, look. Follow him. Follow him. He knows where he's going... He knows something." Simmons said.

"What?" Sam asked.

"He knows something!"

They quickly follow Simmons and Wheelie.

"You got what I got?" Simmons asked.

"Yeah." Sam said,

They stop in front of a SR-71 Blackbird.

"Blackbird." Oliver said.

Wheelie then transforms into his alt mode, "Ooh, there he is. This guy's a legend, like, like, lkk I'm e the Chairman of the Board! Yo, point the Shard and watch the magic happen.

Sam grabs the last piece of the AllSpark and it goes to the plane. Mikaela and Sara look underneath it. They saw the symbol of the plane.

"Oh, shit. It's a Decepticon!" Mikaela shouts.

"Decepticon? Behind the MiG now!" Simmons shouts.

Everyone took cover behind a MiG-21 fighter plane. The Decepticon begins transforming slowly. His parts begin falling off. He then pulls up his visor. He has a beard and walks with a cane.

"Ah. What sort of hideous mausoleum is this? The elderly Decepticon asked, "Answer me, pawns and knaves! Show yourselves or suffer my infinite wrath! You little spinal-cord-based organisms!" He gets hit by an item in the face, "Oof. Oh, bugger it. Behold the eternal glory of... Jetfire! Prepare for remote system override!"

"I can tell you, this guy did not age well." Wheelie said.

"I don't think he's gonna hurt us." Mikaela said.

Jetfire heads to the doors. He tries to use his rockets. " I command these doors to open! Fire! I said fire! He fires but the rocket backwards. Jetfire then bursts the doors down and walks out.

"Whoa, whoa whoa!" Sam and Simmons both shouted, getting out of the way.

"Oh, bollocks! Damn these worthless parts." Jetfire said.

"Wait a second!" Sam shouts.

"Itchy, wretched rust in my arse! Ah!" Jetfire said as he walked away.

"Oh, the museum is going to be very angry. Very angry. We gotta catch that plane." Simmons shouts.

"Yeah, no kidding." Cisco said.

They chase Jetfire to a plane graveyard. Bumblebee and the Twins follow their vehicle mode. Jetfire begins knocking the wings off of C-130s and a tail off one of them.

"Right I'm on a mission." Jetfire said.

"Wait! Wait! Sam shouts.

"Jetfire!" Barry shouts as well.

Jet looks down at the humans, "What do you want?"

"Look, we just want to talk!" Sam shouts.

"I have no time to talk. I'm on a mission. I'm a mercenary doom-bringer. What planet am I on?"

"Earth."

"Earth? Terrible name for a planet. Might as well call it dirt. Planet dirt. Tell me, is that civil war still going on? Who's winning?"

"The Decepticons." Kara replied.

"Ugh! [Spits] Well, I change sides to the Autobots." Jetfire said.

"What do you mean, change sides?" Sam asked.

"It's a choice. It's an intensely personal decision. So much negativity. Who wants to live a life filled with hate?"

"You mean you don't have to work for those miserable freaking Decepticons?" Wheelie asked.

"If the Decepticons had there way, they'd destroy the whole universe." Jetfire replied.

Wheelie crawls to Mikaela's legs, "I'm changing sides. I'm changing sides, too, warrior goddess. Who's your little Autobot?"

"Aw, you're cute." Mikaela smiled.

"Name's Wheelie. Yeah. Yeah. Say my name, say my name." Wheelie begins humping her leg and Sara snickers at this.

"What are you allowing to happen to your foot just now?" Sam asked Mikaela.

"At least he's faithful, Sam."

"Yeah, well, he's faithful and he's nude and he's perverted." Wheelie keeps humping her leg. "Can you just... can you stop?" Sam kicks Wheelie off Mikaela.

"Ey, what are you doing?" Wheelie asked. He then looks at Sara.

"Sorry, Wheelie. Already got a mate." Sara said.

"That freaking sucks."

"It's just something to think about." Sam said to Jetfire, "I won't argue with... what are you saying?"

"I told you my name is Jetfire!" He shouts to the humans, "So stop judging me!"

"Please calm down." Kara said, "No one's judging you."

"Somebody shit the bed this morning." Wheelie said.

"I have issues of my own, and it started with my mother!" Jetfire said, "My ancestors have been here for centuries. My father, why, he was the first wheel! The first wheel. Do you know what he transformed into?"

"No." Simmons said.

"Nothing! But he did so with honor! Dignity, damn it!" Then there was rumbling from him. His parachutes burst out and he falls to the ground.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" The three boys shouted.

"Oh, bollocks. My boosters are fried. Aww." Jetfire slowly gets up.

"I think we can help each other. You knows things I don't know. I know things you didn't know, I do." Sam said.

"I don't think he knows anything. Honestly, I don't." Leo said in confusion.

Then Sam with a knife starts to draw the symbols.

"I could do this all day." Sam explains, "It comes in waves, these vivid symbols. They're symbols, but they're in my mind. You see, all this is in my mind and Megatron wants what's in my mind. Him and someone called the Fallen."

"The Fallen? I know him." Jetfire snarled, "He left me here to rust. The original Decepticon. He's terrible to work for. It's always apocalypse, chaos, crisis. These transcriptions, they were part of my mission, the Fallen's search. I remember now, the Dagger's Tip, and-and the key."

"Yeah, wait, slow down." Sam stops him, "The Dagger's Tip? The key? What are you talking about?"

"No time explain." Jetfire said as he spots lightning on the symbols.

"Wait, wait-" Simmons shouts.

"What are you doing?!" Cisco shouts.

"Hold on everybody! Stay still or you'll die!" Jetfire uses his hand to create a space bridge and everyone vanishes.

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