Author's note:

I may have been reading Dream Angst- or in general- Dream SMP Angst during this week- so why not make a Joker angst, huh???

OuO

Don't hate on the characters :<

Btw- Luker (Joker x Lupin) is included in this One-shot. Do not hate on the ship. 

Joker sighed quietly as he sat on his bed. The phantom thief dropped Hacchi at his little ninja village to have a party with his family. Joker didn't want to be a bother, so he politely declined Hacchi's invitation to join. Besides, Joker thought, he was always a bother.

Just last week, Joker and Spade were on a heist together. Joker kept on talking about his day, saying how delicious his Curry was over and over again. 

Joker was going to say how delicious his curry was for the 50th time that hour, when Spade actually snapped. "Joker, can you shut it? I am trying to actually focus, while your just blabbering over nothing!" Spade said. Joker smiled and agreed. But inside, it hurt when Spade asked him to shut up.

The day ago, Joker contacted Shadow, cause he wanted someone to talk too. Hacchi was out once again, buying stuff that day. "Hey Shadow!" Joker began. "If your here to blabber about curry or something, I have no time for it." Shadow said, immediately ending the call. Joker sighed. Does no one want him around anymore? He asked himself.

Joker stared at the wall of his room. His heart, heavier than usual. He tried calling whoever he could... their response was either "we have no time for someone like you" or "I don't want to talk to you today Joker." Others didn't answered. They were busy with a heist or something. But why would no one want to talk with him?

Was it because Joker was the number one phantom thief? 

No, that's not possible.

Was it because he talked about curry all the time?

No, he only talks about curry because he doesn't want anyone to get affected with his personal life and personal problems.

Was it because they hated Joker?

Probably, Joker thought. There were a lot to hate about him. He was messy. He talks about nonsense, and probably they got tired of hearing boring things. Or maybe, they didn't like how Joker beat them in everything kaitou. I mean, Joker was the best in that field. Maybe they were jealous?

No... they aren't like that. Joker thought. 

He decided to get his mind off things as he walked to the living room. TV always keeps his mind off things. 

He turned on the TV as he sat on the couch. So far, there weren't interesting channels.

He scanned through channel after channel when he arrived at a news channel.

The captions read: Kaitou Spade and Kaitou Queen Interview.

Joker turned the volume up to hear the interview... only to have his heart crushed.

The interviewer asked on what was Queen and Spade's opinion on non other than Joker himself.

"Joker, he is annoying! One time, he wouldn't stop talking about curry! It is getting boring and sometimes it is distracting." Spade said.

"I agree with you Spade. Sometimes, I feel like Joker is always busy with his heists that he doesn't pay close attention to how he is making everyone feel. I was on a heist with him 3 weeks ago, and he created his so called "miracle" while getting me stuck on a trap! He didn't even bothered to come back for me." Queen said.

I didn't get to save you Queen, because I had to rush back to the Road Joker to pick up Rose and Lupin from their heist... I promised to help them. Joker thought.

"Joker also breaks most promises he makes with me." Spade said.

Why are they lying?

"I hate him. He is always the best of the best." Queen said.

They are joking.

"I want to tell him in his face that we aren't friends anymore- he can stop his lying to me that he cares about me or Queen or anyone. He only cares about his treasures." Spade said.

It isn't real

"I wish he was gone!!!" Queen yelled.

The room was dark. Too dark. The only light was the little candle in the middle of the room.

Joker sat on the bed. He was holding a picture frame. Everyone he ever cared about was in that picture.

They won't miss you, a voice whispered.

He opened a drawer to his left, as he took out the sharp blade from inside.

The little candle's light flickered on the blade. Joker stared at it.

It won't hurt... right???

Warning: Skip if you aren't comfortable about the topic "self-harm"

Joker placed the blade on his skin. He thought about stopping... But that didn't happen. In one quick movement, Joker created a cut on his left wrist. He watched as the blood started to ooze out. The cut wasn't large, not small. Just right. Joker's eyes beamed as the blood started to drip on his bedsheet.

A wave of relief flooded Joker's mind.

He took the blade again, and created another cut. And another. His left arm filled with cuts. One cut after another, Joker felt his pain go away. He was suddenly snapped back to reality when he realized there were no more space to create cuts on his left arm.

So, he started cutting on his right arm.

A puddle of blood was on the floor, as the candle continued to flicker. Joker laid down on his bed, as the bedsheet soaked up the remaining blood from his cuts.

Joker stared at the ceiling. Thinking what to do now. He knew he had to hide the evidence of his cutting, but he can think of that later.

Joker wanted to feel more pain. He wanted to see more blood ooze out of his own body. He wanted to hurt himself, because he felt hurt. He felt betrayed. He didn't want to hurt his so called friends. It didn't felt right. So, if he can't hurt them, he can hurt himself. He sat up from his bed, as he took the blade again. 

He took of his shoes, as he ripped his pants, so that it now reaches his thighs instead of his ankles.

As he made one swift movement, a new fresh cut was seen on his thigh. It looked way bigger than the cuts on his arms. Joker smiled, a genuine smile. He never felt happy about seeing blood on him. He then made 3 more cuts on both thighs, before putting the blade down for the day.

He stayed in his bed for a while. Until he gathered the energy to stand up. He took his now bloody bedsheet into the wash, as he mopped the floor, removing the now 2 puddles of blood.

He didn't want to tell anyone how he feels, he'll just be a waste of time.

Joker made his way to his treasure room, as he walked down the different aisle of treasures. He didn't bother to bandage his cuts. He liked how some of the blood still drops down to his fingers.

His eyes caught one treasure. He forgot the name of it. But, it was a sword. A pointy sword.

Joker took the sword out of its display. He stared at the pointy edge. He looked at his still bleeding thighs. 

He took the sword, and carefully made a cut on his right thigh. It was a lot deeper, and a lot more longer than the other cuts he made. He watched as a lot of blood dripped out of the wound. Joker smiled. He raised his hand, as he made another similar cut on his left thigh. 

He looked at his arms, to see if he could make another cut. Joker decided to just go over the first cut he made, but with the sword. And that was what he did.

You may proceed to read here:

It has been 4 months. Joker soaked himself in cutting and harming himself. He hasn't stepped outside of the treasure room. Using the sharp edges of different treasures, Joker made one cut after another.

Hacchi tried calling Joker to pick him up, but Joker wouldn't answer. The little ninja thought Joker was busy at first. But in reality, Joker throwed his phone out of the window.

Lupin became worried. He hasn't heard from the famous phantom thief for so long- it ached his heart. He decided one day to find Joker. And that was what he did.

Luckily, Lupin had a tracker on one of Joker's hat. So it wasn't a big problem finding Joker. The problem was getting on the Sky Joker. It was in the air. Not landing anytime soon too.

Lupin rang his phone, as he asked Phoenix for assistance. Phoenix, being worried over Joker agreed too. The duo flew into the night, catching up to the Sky Joker.

Luckily, they made it just in time.

Joker was lying on the floor. He was sitting on a pool of his own blood. The words of his "friends" repeated in his head day after day after day. His vision started to blur, as he spaced in and out. Suddenly, he saw two figures come towards him. He couldn't make it out on who it was. His vision failed him at this time.

Lupin and Phoenix landed on the roof of the Sky Joker. They noticed that the treasure room was the only area of the Sky Joker that had light. So, they went there.

The duo gasped as they saw Joker, lying on the floor. He was still breathing. Swords, to spears, to tiny trinkets were surrounding Joker, all having blood on them. Lupin noticed all the cuts on Joker's skin, as tears started to come out of his eyes. Phoenix gave a worried glance, as he rushed to find the aid kit. Lupin ran to Joker, calling his name. But it seems that Joker fainted.

It has been 2 days, and Joker was still asleep. Lupin and Phoenix hasn't left Joker all by himself. They haven't answered the calls of their friends, not wanting to tell them what was going on. They didn't even knew what was going on to be exact.

Phoenix noticed that Lupin had been crying too much- Phoenix didn't like seeing Joker hurt, nor Lupin crying. He hasn't had many conversations with Lupin, but he was willing to be friends with him.

Both boys glanced at Joker, as the Kaitou opened his eyes.

"Joker... what happened?" Lupin asked.

Joker stayed silent.

"It hurts... their words hurt so much." Joker said.

Phoenix wanted to ask questions, but he decided to leave it to Lupin.

"Whose words hurt you, Joker?" Lupin asked, as he sat on the edge of Joker's bed. Phoenix stayed put on the chair he was sitting in.

"I.. don't want to talk about it." Joker said sadly.

Lupin hugged Joker, as Phoenix smiled, leaving the room to give time to the two.

Joker cried on Lupin's shoulder, as Lupin comforted the boy.

While that was happening, Phoenix walked out of the room, as he closed the door. His fhone- wait- what was it called? Oh right, a Phone, Phoenix thought, began to ring. It was Spade. He didn't knew why the boy was calling him. He never calls Phoenix. So he answered the call.

Phoenix - what do you want Spade? You never call me?

Spade - That is not the point- have you seen Joker?

Phoenix fell silent. He knew he shouldn't tell Spade just yet on where they were. He knew that Spade had something to do with why Joker is filled with cuts and wounds. How did the bird knew? Well, he noticed red blood-mark x's on a picture of Spade on the floor where they found Joker. He didn't told Lupin yet. It was only Phoenix who knew.

Phoenix - I don't know. I haven't heard from him for a while

Spade - damn... well, call me when you find him.

Phoenix - yeah, yeah.

Joker dried the tears in his eyes as he looked at Lupin.

"Can you tell me what happened?" Lupin asked. Joker nodded his head as he pointed at a drawer. "There is a flash drive in there..." Joker said as Lupin took out the said flash drive. "I'll see to it. Get some rest Joker." Lupin said. Joker smiled weakly as he laid down on his bed.

Lupin handed the flash drive to Phoenix. "We need to see whatever is in it." Lupin said. Phoenix nodded his head as they both made their way to the living room. Lupin plugged the TV as Phoenix inserted the flash drive.

Only one file was there. A video. An interview of Spade and Queen dating months before. Lupin and Phoenix didn't watched the interview. It didn't seemed important.

They watched the whole interview. Stared in shock and utter betrayal. They both didn't thought that Spade or Queen would say such things. 

The duo argued afterwards, debating whether to tell everyone else. In the end, they both decided to keep it a secret between themselves.

They took the time to help Joker out. Lupin doing that part.

Phoenix created a fake background story on why Joker was gone for the meantime. He continues to go with the other Kaitou's to investigate more of the matter. Who knows, there might be more to the story.

Joker is feeling a bit better. He tend to ask Lupin to cuddle with him in bed. It is because he has terrible nightmares about those awful words his "friends" said. Lupin didn't mind. He loved holding Joker safely in his hands. It made Lupin's heart flutter.

Spade and Queen however, decided to follow Phoenix. Wanting to find out if the bird knew where Joker was. But to no avail. Phoenix was always careful when he visits Lupin and Joker. He wants Joker to make a full recovery before going back to being a phantom thief. 

Shadow was concerned too. But he decided to shrug it off. Thinking that Joker just wanted a break from being a phantom thief.

Joker smiled as Lupin handed him some coffee. "What do you want to do now?" Lupin asked the boy. Joker smiled. "I just want to be here. With you." Joker said.

The End?

Author's note:

Hey everyone! I would put an Author's note in each chapter now!

I hope you guys enjoyed reading this one-shot! I wanted it to be a lot shorter- but that didn't happen hehe-

This one shot could have become a book- but I have to much on my plate at the moment- so one-shot it is :)

You can give out suggestions so I can improve on writing here! <3

Thank you and have a great week!

Just one question-

If Hacchi called Joker to pick him up... and Joker didn't answered (duh)- then what happened to Hacchi? 

I'll let that question sink in-

Btw- credits to @Action_LiveHex for the idears- (sorry if it was kinda late mention T^T)