| two weeks later|
| Bae Joohyun|

I sit up in my bed moving my hair out of my face. I look around my room seeing the mess on the floor of tissue and covers. I sigh holding my head feeling light headed. The past couple of weeks have not been good for me. After Jackson breaking up with me I have not left my room. I've barely eaten nor used the bathroom nor shower. I know sorry but I haven't had the guts to get our of bed.

Nothing has been good and I shouldn't be tore up about a boy, but Jackson was my first everything. He was the first guy that I've ever loved and put my all into and he just broke up with me. And I shouldn't be those bitches who cry for no reason over a man, but it's different I feel like. Just a few weeks ago we were all lovey dovely, nothing could tear us apart. And despite my mom wanting to break us up she was finally coming around, more expecting that I had a boyfriend.

But I guess her fear came true. The fear of me getting my heart broke came true, and I feel the pain that she was trying to prevent me from feeling, but this is a learning experience I guess despite me blaming solely everything on me making me now sad, it's something I can learn from.

I got up out the bed holding my head and stomach. I closed my eyes as my head was pounding and my stomach growling along with feeling nauseous. I shouldn't do this to myself but this had happened to me before so I guess I'm used to it but I really don't like the feeling that I get from it. I held my head slowly walking to the bathroom where I do my morning business.

Once I was finished I searched through my cabinets looking for some ibuprofen (pain killers) for my headache and once I found it I took two of them drinking some tap water gulping it down. My stomach hurting and growling once more before I slowly walk back out the bathroom. I look around my room spotting my phone.

I was scared to look at my phone. I didn't want to find myself of Jackson, because as soon as I do look at my phone a picture of him kissing me is right there on the lock screen then if I open it, it's a picture of us that we took when I spent the night over his house a few weeks back. And my heart was still hooked to him like a drug that now I'm on withdrawal I don't know what to do. I collect my thoughts before I pick up the phone.

I look at it seeing multiple miss calls and text from Wendy, Joy and Seulgi, some from my other friends and alot from social media and an email. Which I rarely get. Sitting down at my desk, I opened my phone clicking on the email. I opened it seeing it was from pornhub, and I don't even watch that type of shit so who would send it to me.

I read the title. "Fucking my ex before he sees his girlfriend. Hope she doesn't see it." I read out loud disgusted by the name of the content. I opened it tempted. I watched looking closer at the guy who was on the bed laying there.

"Is that.." I covered my mouth knowing who it could possibly be. My body feeling hot as girl walked into frame.

"What are you doing Youngji?" Jackson's voice boomed throughout the room. Tears welling up into my eyes as she crawled on the bed straddling him. "Nothing Jackson, just giving you the time of your life."

I turned off my phone throwing it across the room. I sat their in shock as tears started to fall from my eyes. The pain shooting to my heart. I put my head down on the desk cring hard. Was thus the reason why he fucking was ignoring me? Was it because she was fucking Youngji. The girl he claimed that he hate Because of the shit she did to him, and how he almost beat her up, he was fucking and she recorded it. What and lied and told me that he was doing something else when he was fucking another girl.

I'm so fucking dumb.

"Joohyun?"

I heard my mom call out on the other side of the door. She knocked again before coming in. "Joohyun are you okay?" She asked. I shook my head pointing to my phone that laided on the floor. She walked over picking it up as I wiped my tears that continue to fall. She picked it up walking over to me as I put in the password she looked at the video placing it down as I broke down more. She rubbed my back as I tried to calm down the feeling was so unbearable that everytime I tried to the thought of him breaking up with me plays in my head and now that video. And even though I didn't watch the hour long video it bother me.

He didn't have to lie to me about what he was doing nor did he have to lie and tell me he love me either.

"Joohyun did you decide what you wanted to do? I'm going to earth in a few days."

I sat up holding my head. "I'm going to go with you, I really don't think it's safe for me to stay here. So I'ma go." I tell her she nods leaning down kissing my head. "I love you Joohyun you'll get through this okay. I'ma go fix breakfast for you okay. You wanna come out here?"

"Thanks mom. I'll be out in a few." She nodded. She leaned down once again kissing my head before leaving the room. I laid my head down picking up my phone looking at my lock screen. A stray tear rolling down my face before I turned the phone off closing my eyes.

Hella short next chapter will be long, I promise. Oh and tell me if you like the characters point of view Because I'll try and add it more often because I like writing it.

Secrets Fan Fiction 🏳️‍🌈