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She sat up stretching her arms for sometime before folding the sheets . This head ache was still killing her, she rubbed her forehead as like the pain would vanish if she does and resumed arranging the pillow but stopped after when she noticed it. A small parchment beneath the pillow.

' I'm leaving ' it said.

It hardly took her a second to realize what it actually meant. Annika knew how her father has been these days, he never liked living like this. He wanted more but all he had were three daughters to handle, no fund for his research, no justice for his son's death, lost his wife to jaundice . He never spoke until it was crucially necessary, she understood he was having his bad days and thought he would reach some threshold point and come back , cause that's what families do.

But after seeing this note, the reality hit hard. He left forever. She then saw the tiny twins sleeping on the other bed. Curled to themselves . She was about to burst out crying but rushed to the other room and locked herself before anything. She didn't want to scare them.

She broke down in tears and surrendered to this feeling of misery. What was she going to do now? Even yesterday a few loan sharks had come to seize their house. The girls are too small and she had just joined college. She was too afraid and vulnerable. Veer, then her mother, and now this man. Hell broke for her .

Curling herself to a small thing, she cried pressing her face to the floor. She has no one now. The more she cried the more it ached, her head felt like it would explode for she kept turning positions to overcome it. And suddenly out of nowhere she felt it, her side vision alarmed her , like someone was here. Her body shivered as she looked by that side slowly and for a second, she almost died on seeing it.

Jhanvi her mother, looking completely strange and scary in that attire, wearing a multicolored shirt with black pant. She was grinning wide showing every tooth of hers . Annika wriggled out and dragged herself far from it, as much as she could. When the wall hit from the back, she pressed her legs together and brought it close to her chest and tried hiding between her knees.

Her mother always wore salwars and she never used a bindi this big, Annika was shook, every time she blinked to come out of this , she only saw her coming close and close and close up until she was just a few inches away from her.

' Kill them and die, kill them and die! '

She heard her saying this continuously, that wide smile haunted her like anything . She closed her ears and again moved away from there, her legs didn't help she fell down and dragged herself to hide under the bed. Her muffling sobs got worse when she saw the face again, peeping down to watch her from the other side of the bed.

A- please please!!

' kill them! Die! '

A- please!!

There was no sign of Annika the whole day, the girls were scared until they heard her voice from that room once.

A- I'm tired, I'm going to sleep. Eat your food and do not play outside. No karate classes today so do your homework and play in the house only.

Riya and Riti were two kids who can't stay a second without quarelling. And when Annika wasn't there to control, they went more wild . It all started when Riya tore Riti's drawing note by mistake, well by mistake Riya said but she knew she did it with all vengeance on Riti for not letting her be the player 2 in the video game she played last night.

They ate nothing but bread and jam whole day. Riya banged the door once but there was no answer from Annika. At one point they felt strange as Annika wasn't coming to switch off the TV when it was past their regular screentime duration. Little kids really didn't know what their sister was going through, they ate, played and slept like they were asked to.

Father was always on and off, so they didn't much go eager about him missing. They loved him,but he never really showed a much affection or something. Still, they looked upto him because he was family.

And very soon it was next morning, not so weird as yesterday. Annika was here waking them up , singing those regular phrase while pulling their blankets.

Riya- where's daddy?

A- Dad said he won't stay with us anymore . Weekend is over , time for school now go get ready , quick!

Riti- why?

A- I won't drop you at school if you miss the bus.

This tone is dangerous they knew .

Annika frowned at him confusedly when she saw him standing outside her house, with his bike parked aside.

S- what happened to your phone?

A- you called me?

He looked pissed off.

S- are you in Mars or what , what happened and what were you doing yesterday? I couldn't reach you at all.

The bus had come by then, she dragged the girls without replying to him. And Riti almost tripped over her loose shoe laces.

S- careful Annika, what's the hurry!

Shivaay caught her at the right time and carried her to his bike. He made her stand on it and helped her with the lace. Annika who held Riya with her watched all this quietly.

S- did she take you anywhere out yesterday?

Riti- no, she slept.

S- really?

Riti nodded, he carried her in his arms again after tying the shoe lace, he himself took her to the bus.

Riya- Annika

Riya streched her arms open insisting her to pick her up after seeing Riti with shivaay. Annika just sighed once and adjusted the school bag which hung around her shoulder before carrying Riya with her.

Riti - do we have Karate today?

A- yes and Riya finish your lunch fully.

Riya- hmm.

A- bye.

S- bye girls !

They stood back and waved their hands when the bus moved.

Annika sat on the couch and said nothing, she acted as if here wasn't here only.

S- your dad?

A- not here.

S- Riti said you slept fully yesterday. What's wrong?

Annika picked the jar but there was no water in it , he went to the kitchen to fetch some.

A- some food too please when you're at it.

He shook his head in disbelief and collected a plate to fill it with something.

S- I shouldn't have come here

There she was, fast asleep already when he came back.

S- really?

Keeping the plate aside, he carried her to the room.

For a few minutes, he stayed there rubbing his thumb over her cheek softly . Deep sleep she was in.

S- you better at least dream of me , you hardly even look at me in real.

He muttered these words casually and moved but she didn't seem to approve though. As her hands ran around his abdomen Annika turned to literally throw herself at him .He was captured under her now.

It was half past noon when she moved a bit and woke up from that sudden deep slumber. His hold was tight around her, one hand caging her waist and the other running under to neck to hold her head securely. Annika couldn't ask for more, she felt protected. She didn't have a blink of sleep last night, and now she was actually surprised by the fact that she slept forgetting all that disaster, with him.

Yesterday was something she'd never even want her enemy to go through. Inside she knew it was all in her head, it's not her mom. But that second, it was terrible and scary. It was torturing her the whole day, she tried to hide inside the bathroom, sat with headsets playing loud songs, nothing seemed to work though. It's beyond what she could handle, she understood.

Doctors can help maybe but then she thought of the girls. She already has enough debt to be cleared . Annika was sure of one thing, to not let her sisters suffer like she did. She pledged to become the parent her father failed to be. To keep them ready for this cruel world. Maybe this sick head is gonna rip her apart but she chose to keep it aside and help the twins first. It didn't mean that she was fearless, she was but there is no choice. She wasn't ready to compromise their life for some random disease she's got in her head.

Shivaay woke up when he couldn't feel her anymore.

S- first day of the week, we both are doing a very good job.

He spoke stretching his arms and sat up next to her. Annika was going to say something but she couldn't when her eyes fell on the mirror behind him. The same figure appeared again, she froze for a second before jumping up close to hug him tight. Shivaay had to press his hand hard on the bed for support as he didn't see this coming. She scooted close as much as possible until she was actually on his lap, with her eyes crushed to shut, she stayed like that burrying her face in his crook.

She pulled his hand which was pressed to the bed and made him hold her . Shivaay was clueless.

S- what happened?

Shivaay felt his neck part aching by then, her grip was that tight. He just rubbed her back continuously while she was in deep search of peace in this embrace cause she knew this is the only place where she'd find it.

Then suddenly it was gone , she made sure by seeing the mirror alone and didn't turn back to confirm.

A- bad demon dream.

She whispered slowly, with her face pasted under his chin still. It tickled him while she spoke.

S- not sure if I'm capable of saving you from demons.

A- you just did.

He tilted his head down and simultaneously, she looked up . That moment gave it to her, the courage to go on. Everything is uncertain and temporary they say, but here if at all annika was sure of anything in life, it was him. He would do anything for her, she knew. She couldn't love him more than this for being her cure. For helping her fight with herself. Both melted in the eyelock and soon she let herself drown in the kiss she demanded. Shivaay came up very soft and delicate with her, he literally handled her like she was some glass doll while she explored him wild enough. He couldn't actually control himself when her palm travelled to reach down his neck.

S- what are you doing to me...

A- planning to rape you, ready to loose your virginity?

She kissed all over his face while mumbling this, shivaay chuckled immediately.

S- who said I'm still a virgin , last time when I went States to meet mom

She bit his lips hard before he could complete it.

S- ahh annika!

A- you're still too young and naive for all that so stop lying.

S- ok last time I didn't but this time, like I'm actually leaving tomorrow so I'll give it a try.

He smirked saying it while her reactions changed immediately.

A- tomorrow?

S- yes tomorrow, that's what I've been trying to tell you the whole time , you didn't even pick my call.

A- why so sudden ?

S- you know right, mom is upset I didn't choose to study there. I would've convinced her somehow, but she's not even talking to me these days and I, I can't go on like this. I miss her.

It struck her immediately. He's a person with his own emotions and troubles to solve, she shouldn't hold him back for her sake . During school days after every summer she'd have this fear that he wouldn't turn up at class but he did. His parents had so many dreams for him but he refused to stay with them just because of her, he wouldn't admit it but she knew. She had already held him back enough by stealing the days he could've spent with his family.

After seeing how people are always meant to leave one day, annika couldn't help but think he should too. It's not that she didn't trust him, but she understood he's got a life and she shouldn't be selfish about him. Yesterday at a certain point she obeyed the voice and prepared to kill herself to escape the misery. It was Riti's voice from the other side of the door which brought her back to senses.

She wasn't certain of her mind , and suddenly decided to not put this burden on him. If this suffering is meant to be for her, she can't just pull him along. There's no guarantee that it will turn out any less dangerous the next time. Annika made up her mind to live with this but why should he?This isn't right, I should let him go, she thought.

Only if she knew what all he'd do for her.

And just like that , one day she broke up with him.

S- you're sure this will work? I need an upper hand here and I do not want to fail.

L- I've been with him a few times, he'd whisper her name in my ears all night thinking I'm her.

Shivaay didn't say anything further, Leena watched him curiously before initiating again.

L- and, I'm sorry... for not telling you the truth. We were afraid, that something might happen to you.

He walked away but she followed him insisting the same until he said anything.

S- leena I don't remember anything now, I don't even know how she looks after these five years. But in those few hours, when I thought I am still breathing and she...she's not you know how I felt? I died. I always thought I could forgot her one day, yes she's very rude and threw me out of her life like I was nothing to her, but there's never been a proper timeline in my life, no past , present or future. It has always been only her . You say something might happen to me , what if I say I'd die and kill for her? Maybe even she didn't know this or maybe she knew and still she left I don't know but now, today, all I know is I would bring her back. I don't care about what happens to me.

Shivaay left saying this, Leena watched him worriedly. She knew he loved annika but now realized, it was not just love he had for her, it was everything more that just it.

' Die baby,come to me '

Annika pressed her palms to her ears and crawled around the godown to get rid of this voice. It was not just her mom, veer too was here .

Impact happens when trauma overthrows the threshold point. Annika has been through too many of them, and in her case the impact split into impact points leaving her mind just there to suffer the part for each. One, her family's death, her father abandoning them and the other happened when she thought shivaay died .

Her mind turned the second point positive for her, gave her the vision that she was living with him. The former is the counterpart of it though, it's always been the same, nightmare. So she either suffers with her mother's voice or gets into this hallucination of being with shivaay. DID does that to a person according to the impact points. It doesn't occur all the time, but when the brain explodes with stress it can't handle, these characters come out.

' Come to me '

She felt like her ears would bleed soon, it was horrible. Annika struggled over and over but the volume only got high, the visuals were equally scary. Her mother and veer were both dressed in saree , wearing bull crowns, showing their big eyes.She shivered watching their smiles.

When it was unbearable, she thought of nothing else, picked that iron blade lying in the corner and slit her wrist.

Have published  a new book Superstitions, Perspections. It's a short story, do give it a try if possible.

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