chapter nine ;; light show for myself
jungkook's perspective
°☆.。.:*・°☆

[for those of you who are back from me redoing this story, i advise you to read the last chapter again to know what's going on.]

Taehyung and I were currently sat together at a small table for two, voices soft and calm. We were both tired, still trying to get to know each other more, "What job do you have now?" The male sitting across from me asks.

I take a slow sip of my hot coffee of cinnamon with honey and shake my shoulders, not really having an answer. There currently wasn't a job weighing my shoulders down, and it was an embarrassing fact to bare, "I don't have one."

Taehyung quirks an eyebrow and lightly shakes his head, "How do you support a life without making any money?"

I did want to say the truth about why I didn't work, but my boyfriend payed for everything that there was needed, and he even payed for the cup of coffee in my hands. I didn't really do enough of things in the first place to even apply for a job. Nothing really stood out on my resumé, other than good grades and a decent face, but everyone in South Korea was smart, "My parents pay for my stuff." My quiet voice says in a mumble, putting a blanket over the truth.

Taehyung couldn't help but laugh, green bangs falling in his face and brown eyes. It caused an instant uproar in all my systems, ravishing in the sight of something so pure set out in front of me. Everything seemed to slow for just a mere second, paying close attention to what continued for just a little white longer. I took note that the older's smile was enjoyable, causing my eyes to trickle back down to an almost empty and offset coffee cup.

"Everything okay," Taehyung asks, tilting his head to the side and eyes brimming with concern, "I'm sorry if I offended you by laughing."

"Y-You didn't," I instantly respond, watching closely and seeing the worry instantly fading away, as if nothing happened. With a blink of an eye, Taehyung was back to his usual self, "but what made you get into smoking? I mean...you do it so often."

"Besides the mere addiction," he almost sadly begins, leaning forward and slumping down for a more comfortable way of sitting. His thin elbows were heavily situated on the light wood table and face much closer to mine now. Musky smoke and black coffee filled my senses, usually such an unwanted smell wafting into something that seemed almost envious, "I started doing it after a few things happened to me, and it just kind of coped with anxiety, I guess."

There was a distinct depression dropped in, seeping through somewhat yellowed teeth like air. Eyes that easily showed so much emotion, which would normally be hidden behind a blank stare flickered and shadowed, creating some sort of light show for myself to stare at.

I didn't bother to say anymore after that one question, feeling bad for even bringing it up. That's where I drew the line on what to ask and what not to ask, wanting to envelope the older male into some sort of protective shield from everything wrong and bad. He looked extremely...out of it.

We both drank the rest of our coffee in peace, looking at the snow that had begun to fall and at each other again, and slowly, Taehyung's spirit began to change back to normal. There was no awkwardness, and there was no hectic behavior to say something- anything. It was as if we'd known each other for eternity, our souls most likely crossing many paths in lives before this current one.

----

"I can drive you home." Taehyung slowly spoke, turning towards me with a solemn stare that had an attempt to be joyful. That same stare had become almost a normality by now, adapting to all that he was and all that there was to be. Dark brown, sad eyes and a perfect curvature of smooth lips, which had latched with many others.

"Sure..." I whisper, his eyes casting towards the black impala with a fresh layer of bright and cold snow, "but I can help you with wiping the frost of your car too." I offer, smiling softly. A kind way of nature always came with my outset actions, at least I'd been told by old friends. The tan male that stood next to me seemed to be pleased by the idea, saying a quick okay before we both began to walk onto an icy road, "Are you sure that you can drive?" My voice spoke over the crunching of snow covered ice.

"Definitely, as long as it's not clear ice. There might be a few patches but that's no big deal. Other cars are already driving anyways." He reassures, looking over at me while speaking. Taehyung enjoyed eye contact, something that had been learned quite quickly. It was either a habit of staring or a hatred for not enough connection within a simple conversation like this one. Either way, I didn't really mind it when our eyes met for only seconds. It seemed to calm my whole self, once again blaming a feeling like that distinct one on past lives spent in each other's company.

We met with the old and sweet car, also known as Taehyung's prize possession. He put his heart into this distinct piece of machinery, putting in more money than he ever could get back if sold. I'd already been told about how his old garage was practically his home at one point, falling asleep in the leather backseat and not minding at all. I'd been told such a stupid story once asking about a fluffy blanket found in the back, causing a throaty chuckle to emit and a smooth and deep story telling voice sweeping through the car's locked doors while cruising down a barely busy road.

Taehyung opened up the trunk with ease, showcasing two ice scrapers and a tool box. He grabbed the two desired items and carefully handed one to me before slowly closing the door shut, not wanting to disrupt anything within the old car. Without anymore exchanged words, our hands got to work and scraped and chipped away unwanted ice, which would only put Taehyung in harm. Starting at the rear window and working our way towards the front, there was small talk spread over the voices of two people.

"Why did you even get an Impala in the first place? I mean, you could've picked from so many different cars..."

Taehyung grins, continuing to scrape off a piece of ice that was being troublesome, "Well, it was the first car that my Grandad ever got. Him and my Grandma would get into so much trouble, sneaking out and getting away with the damn thing."

I couldn't help but feel a warmth spread throughout my entire body, listening to his calmed words. Redness creeped upon a pale face, Taehyung taking notice and laughing slightly, "Shut up, it's just the cold weather." Even though my voice sounded unconvincing, I brought my hand up to my face and tried to rub the pink away, if possible, "You talk about your grandparents a lot." I mention, watching him think slightly before answering.

"Well, yeah, their love story could be a book." Taehyung begins, shrugging his shoulders and not seeming too much about it, "What they had when they were younger is just...I don't know."

"What about your parent's love story?"

"I'd rather not talk about it." He mumbles between barred teeth, quickening his earlier pace and engrossing into a state of working anger. Nonetheless, Taehyung seemed to look peaceful.

----

Heat blasted onto our faces from the car's vents, and I mentally sighed at the comforting feeling, bringing my numb hands up to the grate in order to thaw them out. They were pink on the tops and knuckles, feeling ice cold and numb overall, and even though I was wearing a pair of gloves, thin pieces of cloth did nothing to help.

As we both pull out of the small parking lot, Taehyung stops the car for a moment and takes his hands off of the steering wheel, reaching backwards. He takes ahold of the white fluffy blanket that I had already asked about, placing it on my lap afterwards and going back to driving. The older male didn't say anything afterwards, only continued to drive as if nothing happened.

Me, on the other hand, I took it for everything. My frozen hands unfolded the thick material and draped it across my self. Bringing knees close to my chest, I tightly grip onto the softness, fisting the cloth between my thin fingertips and letting out a satisfactory sound. I instinctively turn my head and place it against the blanket, causing my cheek to squish down.

Taehyung softy grins, glancing towards me then back to the road covered in thick ice, "Where do you live?" He questions once we get a good distance away from the coffeeshop.

"Um," I think, sitting up slightly and looking around the snow covered area surrounding, "turn down that way." My thin finger points at a certain road, Taehyung only responding with a puzzled face but continuing anyways.

"Are you sure that you live over here?"

"Yeah, why," I ask, tilting my head to the side.

"Only really rich people live down here." Taehyung explains, continuing onwards down the road and being careful not to hit any fancy Cadillacs on the way, "Are your parents rich?"

I could've easily explained that my words from earlier were of embarrassment and that my boyfriend paid for a house up here. I could've told him all the truthful things. Subconsciously, there was no doubt that a attempt to act single was pursuing, and maybe I just wanted to get the older's unique attention, make him have all eyes on me and no one else.

"They are," I nod along, looking around and placing my hand onto Taehyung's toned bicep before speaking, "stop here, my house it right there." The older male stops the car with slightly widened eyes, understanding how expensive a place like this would be to live in. Either way, he didn't seem to thankfully have anymore questions about it. I take off the blanket, placing it in the backseat before turning to fully face Taehyung again, surprised by the close proximity that I hadn't taken any notice to at first, "I-I'll, um, see you some other time." My voice had turned into barely a whisper at this point.

Taehyung's lips did seem to quickly pull apart, as if to say something, but nothing came out. I understood that current feeling, wanting to turn away and truly say goodbye but not seeming to have the will. The current scene was some sort of intense staring contest, drawing closer and closer to test who would pull away first between the two. Soft, breathy sounds which smelled of smoke was running across my face, heart pounding with anticipation yet so much guilt.

Our lips did in fact brush, ran together for just a few moments. Everything in my right mind was shouting, screaming at me to stop and pull back now, stay loyal to the person that needs me to be. That's why his soft and pink lips didn't stay on mine, a gut instinct telling me that this was wrong, because it was wrong. I couldn't do anything of that sort, not caring if it would've just been a couple lousy kisses. I had a kind way of nature, after all. Betraying someone in some sense, no matter how much I wanted to do it in that very moment, nothing could bring me to it. Call me goody two shoes, if you wish.

"Sorry," Taehyung almost inaudibly speaks, turning his head away and finding new interest in the houses that lined the other side of the street.

I could only look down at my hands for a second to collect myself. There was no way to cover up what had just occurred, deciding to accept what had happened instead, "No, don't be sorry, i-it's my fault." I glance over to only be met with the back of a head filled with soft brown locks, "Anyways, I'll see you sometime again." Without anymore exchanged words, my thin hands reach out and open up his car door, purposefully going slowly just incase I miss any important words. In the end, there was only a couple more words said from my end, "Be careful with driving, I don't want you getting hurt."

Taehyung nods, finally looking at me again, "Thanks but you should be safe too. Stay warm and be careful if you decide to go out."

"Will do," I kindly smile before closing the heavy door shut, Taehyung's car not driving away until I'm finally inside.

----

i hope that ur ok w me changing the story stilll