By Wolfie

~

Hi I'm Anna, or Wolfie as my name says. Growing up in a family where my parents fought many times, it's very hard to come out to them when there are other problems in our household that should be focused on, (and for the fact that my parents are catholic). When I was young I had a best friend, let's call her K. She was also catholic, and was very homophobic, multiple times she's used the words lesbian or gay in negative context, and I would constantly berate myself, and force myself to be straight. With the frustrations and tensions between my parents and the constant hate towards my own sexual orientation, I often had laid in bed for hours, days even.The worst part is that I didn't even know my constant feeling of sadness and numbness was depression. At the age of fourteen my parents finally split it off, my mother took custody of me and my siblings, and I lost contact with my so-called best friend. I moved schools as well, and to my surprise there were lots of nice people, ha, but I couldn't just come out to them just yet. I made some new friends, kept myself busy to block out the negative memories I had with my family and past friends. I've never felt so free in my life, I had a crush on one of my new friends, she was a year younger than me. She's was kind of a scene kid. One day me and my friends were talking about our crushes and that was when I came out as bisexual for the first time. They weren't surprised, one them even said it was kind of obvious. I was happy because they didn't verbally attacked me, or bullied me, or said it was disgusting like K did. Instead they smiled and joked about how much I stared at my crush so much. I finally had the guts to talk to her about how I feel, yeah. She rejected me, well I would say it was a friendzone. But at least we're in good terms. I also had another crush on a guy a year later, and he was older than me, but he was very jerky so I didn't even try. To this day I'm keeping myself busy, and looking forward to the future, I'm not that old lol, I'm only 16. But I'm still waiting for a good time to come out to my mom as bisexual, and more milestones to come.