I don't want to earn my living, I want to live.
May I go to the toilet = I'm fucking bored.
I'm not single, I'm just romantically challenged.

The zoo is a pretty safe place to fart.

Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!

Those who say money can't buy happiness are shopping at the wrong places.

People say laughter is the best medicine. Your face must be curing the world.

The only reason I am fat is because a tiny body couldn't store all this personality.
I miss your smile but I miss my own even more.

I'm jealous of my parents, i'll never have a kid as cool as theirs.

Justin Bieber was arrested this morning for using men's toilet.

Life is a mirror and will reflect back to the thinker what he thinks into it.

I like crazy people, especially those who don't see the risk.

I want some one to give me a Loan and then leave me Alone.

I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something.