Bring-bring! Bring-bring!

I'm done with you, phone.

Slowly, my hand swiped at the nightstand, blindly reaching toward my CEB phone. After finding it, I answered the call without checking the caller's identity."Mmm-hmm?"

Smith asked in far too chipper a tone, "And how is our Romance Master-kun today?"

I hung up the phone.

Wait a minute...

Bring-bring! Bring-bring!

... Afternoon?

It was my second time answering. "Argh..."

"you're so rude!" Smith exclaimed with sarcasm. "You should know I went out of my way to make sure you were okay...."

Slowly dragging myself out of bed, I complained, "What a kind gesture.".My eyes glazed over as I yawed loudly. "What are the chances you didn't mean afternoon?" I asked.

"Do you think I would lie to you?"

It would have been nice if she could have seen my face when she said those words.My response was to hang up.

I mumbled as I slowly pulled the sheets from me and stood up. "I hate sleeping in...."

Bring-bring! Bri-!

Following my press of 'answer,' I hung up immediately.Smith's trolling would be dealt with after I took a shower.Even then, I wasn't sure whether I'd handle it.The bathroom was mercifully open when I shuffled in my pink bathrobe and slippers.

I remembered last night by taking a deep breath and letting the warm water wash over me.My expectations were nearly nonexistent; honestly, I'd figured it would be more of a scramble to survive, not me maintaining order.

Running my fingers through my hair to smooth the shampoo on, I thought aloud, "Maybe that was a little dickish.".It should be okay if no one died and they didn't hate me.There was no doubt that Centorea was rattled going to bed, and I will probably check on her later.Nevertheless, Miia seemed to take what I said to heart, reaffirming her love for Kuruso with my words.In regards to Papi...

For some reason, she called me "big brother." I had to ensure she didn't mean it like she did when she called Kuruso "big brother." In her room, during the height of the full moon, she didn't immediately try to jump my bones.

My shower session went longer than expected, mostly stalling to determine how last night's events affected me this morning.Perhaps Kuruso's decision (whatever it was) had already been made so that the matter would be laid to rest.The feeling of refreshment I left the bathroom after drying off was sufficient to get me through the rest of the day.

I was catcalled from down the hall.

Immediately assuming it could not be anyone who lived here, I wondered who it could be.The only person that comes to mind is one.

"Yeah, you're responsible for this stupid bathro- Oh."

After turning around, I saw it wasn't Smith. Her suit was the same as that of the perpetual sunglasses-wearing agent.However, the top was barely considered tasteful due to cleavage showing through the slightly parted opening.The grin on her face was wolfish, and I mean wolfish; her teeth looked like they had been filed into fangs.A single line of stitches was visible in the middle of her face.Her heterochromatic eyes, green and yellow, gleefully looked over at me.The final nail in her coffin was her short, red hair with separate bangs.

The identity of the person wasn't a mystery.

A chuckle emerged from Zombina as she said, "I think I would have remembered getting you something like that."

Until she made fun of me, I thought she was cute.

"Why is some stranger catcalling me?" I sighed, tucking my hands into my fluffy pink pockets.

Despite her toothy grin fading, Zombina kept smiling. "The boss sent me up to see how you were doing; she didn't say you were so cute!"

I mused, scratching at my chin idly. I wasn't in the mood because I had only gotten up 20 minutes ago, was still mentally tired from last night, or was wearing a pink bathrobe. "I'll be down in a minute, so tell Smith-san to stop acting like a clingy girlfriend."

"I'll see you there, Hot Pink," Zombina replied with a wink before heading off.

Nicknames like these are fucking ridiculous.

Since I knew Zombina loved to tease people, I did not take her blatant flirtation seriously. But I was surprised to see her here at all. Could the MON Squad also be here? But what's the point? It isn't like there was an emergency anymore, and there won't be food for them for a few more hours.

It wouldn't take me long to learn, would it?

When I got dressed, I went straight for the living room. Sure enough, Smith was sitting at the table drinking coffee with her legs crossed.

"Pretty late for that, isn't it?" I asked as I noticed Zombina leaning against the wall.

"Certainly not," Smith replied, "and you're one to talk, Waking-Up-At-Two-PM-san."

When I approached the kitchen to grab cereal, I noticed the most important part of the kitchen was missing. "Uh, where's Kuruso-san?" I asked.

As she smirked, Smith replied, "He's off-treating the girls as an apology for turtling up last night. I'll babysit you while they're away, with Zombina-chan here."

As I pulled the milk from the fridge, I drawled, "And you did that totally-necessary act out of the goodness of your heart, right?"

I want to speak with you about last night because I have heard some exciting things about it," she said, confirming my suspicions. "I'm hoping to discuss it with you."

Having thought you might, I sighed, gathering some chocolatey cereal into my bowl and refilling my cup of milk as I sat across from Smith with my arms folded. When Smith raised her eyebrows, I defensively asked, "What?"

"Who separates the cereal and milk?" she asked, puzzled.

"Can you tell me what you wanted to hear about last night?" I muttered bitterly as I munched my cereal, feeling more energetic than usual.

"Aki-kun, I'm impressed with you. Not many would go to such lengths - peacefully, too - to keep three liminals in check during a full moon." She set down her mug and looked me in the eye.

The news you delivered was too shaking for Kuruso-san to do anything, so I had to step into the breach." I gulped milk and wiped my milk mustache. "Eh, I just wanted to ensure no one got hurt."

You have taken your job much more seriously than I expected despite your reasons." Smith smiled, and for once it didn't seem condescending. "Thank you for your hard work."

"Oh, you're just saying it, so you don't have to do as much paperwork," Zombina said, standing to the side.

Smith did not correct her. "On the other hand," Smith murmured, sipping her mug again, "the girls all seemed slightly different this morning. Darling-kun was too distracted to notice, but Centorea-chan seemed distracted."

"Has Kuruso-san given them an answer, then?"

"Kinda; darling-kun is going to date all the girls to help him pick." Classic harem protagonist. "But that's a problem for later. They only told me about you treating them for dinner, but they were awkward when I asked how the rest of the night went." Could you tell me why that happened? You weren't taking advantage of their mental barriers when you were there, did you?"

"No way!" I said, "I'd be an absolute scumbag if I did that."

I agree," Smith said with a nod. "So what was it?" she asked.

As I pondered what to say, not wanting to mislead her, I wasn't sure how to proceed. I couldn't be too vague; otherwise, she would become suspicious. After some consideration, I settled on some truths.

"I called them out on some bullshit to get them to listen," I replied. "The full moon affected them pretty badly, so I took action."

Plus, I was pissed while I did it, so it's probably best to remain silent.

As she idly swirled her almost-empty coffee mug, Smith grunted. "Well, I didn't expect that." She grins with an almost predatory air that makes me uncomfortable. "Hm, maybe I can work this out."

"Eh?" I stammered, voice trembling.

She downed the remaining contents of her mug and stood up in one fluid motion. "Thanks again for all your hard work! I will contact you soon."

She was already almost out the door, Zombina right behind her. "Hold on! wait a fucking minute!" I yelled after her.

She called back, "Language, Romance Master-kun!" They both left, but not before Zombina winked and smirked at me.

I swear to God, Smith.

It seemed like I had the house to myself for a while, and it was likely to be the last time in a long time. Putting aside thoughts of the bane of my existence, I sank into my chair and let out a long, drawn-out sigh. My eyes wandered as I gazed at Papi's beloved Wii U under the TV.

There was nothing in the world I wanted to do more than play some video games at that moment. Everything my new life had thrown at me had been put on hold.

To be continued...