"Ok," said Isalio, and he closed his eyes.

My chest pinched at the quick obedience. He knew I had no idea what I was talking about—I didn't know how Demons took lifeforce, much less how a select few were able to give it back—but I also understood why he didn't want to question it. He had been in control for too long, and controlling this exchange terrified him. So, I continued to feign confidence.

"Imagine you're standing in a river, facing upstream." I always imagined a river when he took my lifeforce, so it seemed like a good starting place. "The water is flowing into you, offering itself to you."

I studied his face to gauge whether I was making any sense. He pinched his eyes shut tighter, face screwed up in concentration. Fuck, he trusted me way too much.

I drew a breath. "Now turn around, so the stream is at your back. As it washes over you, feed it back a little of what it gave you."

He nodded, eyes still shut, muscles tensed with focus. First Guardian, I hoped what I was saying would resonate correctly—and that he wouldn't give too much.

"I'm going to take your hand," I said quietly. "You don't need to change anything. I'm already standing downstream from you, so just let the water keep flowing."

When I brushed the back of his hand, he flinched back, drawing a quick breath. I waited for his breathing to even and his body to relax before interlacing our fingers. His skin burned hot, almost painfully so, but I didn't let go.

"Breathe," I commanded, and I vocalized my breaths so he could follow them. When his pace matched my own, I added, "You're doing great. Now slowly, let it go."

I closed my eyes and entered the stream with him, listening to our mingled breaths...

And then I felt it: a gentle pressure, a coil of electricity passing from his hand into mine. The strength of the incoming flow startled me. My fatigue evaporated like droplets under hot sun, and then bolts of raw energy surged through me. My muscles flared in response, demanding release.

I tugged my hand free from his and forced my eyes open. "Hey, are you ok?"

His eyes opened more slowly, and then he blinked as though facing a bright light. "Yeah, I'm good. How do you feel?"

I felt like I was deep underground, at one with the First Guardian's heartbeat, but at the same time, an utterly new sensation soared inside me, almost as if...

"I feel like I own a piece of the sky."

He raised his eyebrows. "Does that mean it's working?"

Since no electricity graced my fingertips, I decided to try a different method to test our success. I strolled back over to the boulder in the entryway, the one only Guardians could move. Instead of pushing it, I crouched to slip both hands beneath it. My fingers found grooves, so the rock stuck in place. Then I hoisted the giant rock off the ground.

It snapped up—too fast, too easy—and clunked against the ceiling. So, I shifted the boulder to one hand, balancing it there. I watched, bemused, as the boulder much bigger than myself hovered in front of me. Still too easy.

I peered down the long skinny chamber and listened as hard as I could. Even though it was dimly lit, I could see all the way down the passageway, and I could listen much further. No footsteps; no breathing. I drew the boulder closer to me, leaning back to allow space—and then I shoved it as hard as I could. The boulder thundered down the passageway, ricocheting off the walls in echoing thunks.

Well fuck, I hoped the cave had good integrity.

With a wince, I turned back to Isalio. "Yeah. I think it's working."

He stared at me with mouth agape for several seconds before managing a response. "Um, did you just...what the fuck?"

"I told you your lifeforce makes me stronger. But it will take more than that to defeat the Morgabeast."

"Right." He still looked a little dazed. "So what do we do next?"

"We keep practicing."

***

We spent the rest of the day exchanging lifeforce back and forth. Both directions were exhilarating, and my theory continued to prove true—we gave each other more lifeforce than we took. By evening, we were both jittery with power.

At nightfall, a Guardian from the Mantle brought us a tray of food. When he eyed us with suspicion, Isalio retreated to the furthest part of the chamber and slapped the cuff over his wrist once more. The Guardian set down the food at the entry, not taking his eyes off of us.

"Thank you, Brother," I said.

He shrugged. "The Sitaklasa humans brought this food and prepared it for us, so it's them you should thank."

I frowned at the note of bitterness in his voice. "I'll thank them as well."

"Humans are the real heroes."

Still that note of bitterness—and of challenge, as if he expected me to disagree. I had said as much to humans before, but that was clearly not the reputation my group carried here.

"Some humans are heroes," I said, warily, "And some Guardians are heroes, and some Demons are heroes."

His eyes darted to Isalio and then quickly back to me, face screwed up in disgust. "Some Demons."

I sighed, lacking the energy to try to change his mind. Now that the buzz of excitement had dissipated, I suddenly realized how exhausted I was. Though the lifeforce exchange had amplified my powers to unprecedented levels, the process had left me mentally and emotionally drained.

The Guardian left, and Isalio and I grabbed the food. I sat down near the middle of the chamber, but he retreated to the furthest part again. I raised an eyebrow at him, but he refused to look at me, so I dug into the meal. A fermented circular flatbread accompanied the stew, and when I soaked it in the broth, each bite was a tangy-savory explosion of flavor.

But a little bitter regret tainted the experience. The Sitaklasa humans must have been accustomed to eating well. By now, the Palace would have turned their town upside down. When this food ran out, at best, they would subsist on rations like I had eaten at the base. At worst...

I didn't want to think about what could happen at worst.

When sated, Isalio set down our bowls and leaned back, propping ourselves on our hands.

"Come here," I requested, patting the ground beside me.

He moved a couple of inches without thinking—then stopped. "Rem...I'm pretty tired. Can we wait until tomorrow to practice more?"

"I'm not talking about lifeforce exchange. I just want you close."

"But I don't—"

The same Guardian who had brought our food reentered, and we both murmured words of gratitude as he took our bowls. He scurried back out without looking at either of us.

Isalio sighed, then turned his focus back to me. "I don't know if I have the energy to..." He checked the entryway once more, then sucked a breath. "To return the favor properly right now."

I rolled my eyes. "I don't have the energy for that, either. When I say I want you close, I'm not implying anything else. I just want you close."

His brows furrowed. "But what for?"

"To be close to you. That's all."

"But why?"

I was too emotionally depleted to fight this battle right now. "Never mind, then. Stay there."

He drew his knees into his chest and wrapped his arms around his legs, looking lost and confused. "I'm sorry. I don't know why I...if you still want me to come, I'll come now, and I won't ask any more questions."

I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose. Fuck, we had made a lot of progress, but we still had so far to go. "Don't be sorry. It's just...when I tell you something I want, it's very, very important to me that you only do that thing if it's what you want, too."

He gave a noncommittal hum, eyes fixed on the ground. "I'm sorry, I'm not very good at—"

"Stop being sorry, please." I sighed. "This is my fault. I need to be more careful."

"Yes...you should definitely be careful around me."

"That's not what I mean."

"Yeah, ok." He tilted his head toward the bed. "Should we sleep?"

I studied him. If he was still suggesting sleeping together, he must not be too upset...but his gaze still had a certain distance to it. "Yes, I think that's a good idea. We both need sleep."

He started toward the bed, but I waited, watching him. When he reached the bed, he turned toward me.

"You coming?"

"Yeah." I stood up, but I didn't follow him yet. "I'll just turn off the lights while you lie down, and then I'll join you."

"If you'd rather sleep alone—"

"No." I blew a breath through my teeth. This lifeforce exchange was making our powers stronger, but it clearly wasn't helping Isalio feel more secure in our relationship—or in himself. That was a much harder endeavor, and it was one I didn't currently have the energy for.

The best I could manage was, "Just stop thinking and go to sleep. Please?"

He jerked his head in a nod and turned back toward the mattress. I started toward the electric lanterns, but as I switched them off, I continued watching him. As he lowered himself down, I gauged the amount of the mattress he chose to occupy, and his position. He lay down on one side of the mattress, close to the middle—then rolled to his side to face away from me.

It could have just been the side he preferred to sleep on, but when I thought back on it, I was pretty sure he usually slept toward me when we were on the same mattress, regardless of which side we were on. Maybe that was my answer, then. Even if he didn't want to deny me, his body language was telling me he needed space.

With a frown, I approached the mattress and settled down on the far side. I rolled out onto my back and interlaced my hands on my stomach. Staring up at the ceiling, I studied the stalactites and ridges as though they might provide an answer to my question.

In so many ways, today had been a success. So why did it feel like a failure?

I turned my head to look at Isalio. Though I knew he was charged with power—overcharged—from behind, I couldn't see that. I just saw the way his silky black locks brushed his collar, how his shirt draped along his lean muscles and cut in toward his narrow waist, how he positioned the leg on top slightly in front of the other as always.

My whole body itched to pull him toward me, to interlace our fingers and warm his back with my chest. I bit my tongue, fisted my hands, and turned my eyes back toward the ceiling.

"Rem?"

The whisper froze me in place, but I stopped myself from turning toward him. "Yeah?"

"We'll try again tomorrow...right?"

I wasn't sure if he was just referring to the lifeforce exchange or to our relationship in general. He had some deep, deep trauma, and every time I tore away one layer, I uncovered another. This would take more than a day to fix—and even though some part of him was clearly desperate to self-sabotage, maybe another part was praying I wouldn't give up on him.

"Yeah," I promised. "We'll try again tomorrow."