LOVE IS...

Jack and Diane were two American kids who got married at a very young age, who after a few years of duking it out and struggling to make ends meet decided to call it quits. They lived in a fantasy place where divorce was decided not by the couple themselves, but by a jury of their peers.

When they arrived at the court the rules about divorce were explained to them by the judge who was a Lion named Mustafa.

"You have been together for 35 years, your song has been played for a long time and many people immortalize you. It would be potentially devastating for all who hold you in esteem to find that you have split up. We will assemble a jury of your peers to decide if your reasons for divorce are sufficient to warrant this break up. If we do, you will go your separate ways, and no further literature will ever be written about you. But if we don't find enough reason for you to split up, then you will have to find ways to rekindle your love. During the trial, we will give you potential ideas for rekindling your love. Please take the stand. Diane you may go first. In one hundred words or less, you must tell us your reason for wanting a divorce from Jack."

Diane shook out her long hair and with a frustrated expression dove in. "Well, you see, Jack and I married when we were just sixteen. Things were good while he played football and I was the debutante of the backseat of his car. Now, money is tight. We had to sell the car, and Jack used his football scholarship to get a business degree. He never eats chili dogs anymore and the thrill of living is just gone."

Mustafa growled low, giving Jack and his lawyer a stern expression.

"Jack you may now have one hundred words or less to explain why you want a divorce from Diane."

Jack cleared his throat and shot a venomous glare at Diane. He scratched his head and did his best James Dean impression. "When we first married it was rock and roll, baby. We ran off to the city and got married, but things got iffy right from the start. She's always too tired from her door to door Bible sales, to dribble off her Bobby Brooks anymore. We just couldn't hold on to sixteen, and changes came along too soon and made us women and men. We're just not compatible anymore."

Mustafa leaned back on his throne and stroked his mane thoughtfully.

"These are very serious charges, to be sure. Let's hear what our jury has to say."

The first jury couple stood up. She was a beautiful blonde haired princess, named Buttercup, and he was The Dread Pirate Roberts, named Wesley.

"Did you ever think your lover was dead, and have to resist the advances of an evil prince who only wanted you for your land?" Buttercup asked.

Jack and Diane shook their heads in bemusement.

"How many times have you held your own opinion and just said, As You Wish, to her?" This was Wesley to Jack.

Jack's eyes widened, and then dropped to the floor.

The next couple stood up. He was a young ruffian named Jack Dawson, and she was a social elite named Rose DeWitt Bukater.

Rose pulled her long red hair to the side. "Do you keep the romance alive by taking her on cruises and standing on the bow of the ship and teaching her to fly?"

"Jack," said Jack. "May I call you Jack? Are you willing to throw her up on a floating door in the middle of the icy Atlantic and hang on till you die so that she may live?"

Diane swallowed audibly, staring at her own Jack, wondering what that kind of sacrifice was like.

The next couple came to the front. She had long brown hair wound up in donut shaped buns over her ears and wore a white sheath, while he looked a lot like Indiana Jones.

"My name is Princess Lea. I was just wondering, Diane, have you ever had to rescue your man while he was encased in a carbonite refrigerator? Have you ever given him his space while he flies off to all parts of the galaxy?"

Diane winced, because she'd never even thought of Jack needing some space, let alone being frozen.

Han Solo nodded thoughtfully. "Have either of you thought of using the force?"

Both of them screwed up their lips in bewilderment. It seemed they had not really tried everything available to save their marriage.

The next few couples told of their own sacrifices made to win and keep their spouses against all the odds.

Harry Potter told about stabbing Tom Riddle's journal while facing a treacherous basilisk in order to save his love, Ginny Weasley. Wall-E beeped about the horrible loneliness of living in a trash receptacle for a hundred years before meeting the love of his life, Eve, who still never spoke to him. Forest Gump talked about the many rejections Jenny had inflicted on him before finally leaving him alone to care for their son for the rest of his life, and yet he looked at her now with adoring eyes.

Jack and Diane gave each other furtive glances. Had they ever had to give up anything really for each other? What would they be willing to do to keep the thrill of living flaming brightly as these couples had done? Death had not separated these lovers.

They listened to the next two couples attentively.

"My name is Ally, and I wrote our love story down in a Notebook so that when and if I got Alzheimer's, Noah could read it to me."

"My name is Noah, and it wasn't easy living with an upper-class rich bitch socialite for all those years, but we each gave it our 100 percent, and never looked back."

"My name is Jamie Sullivan and I had leukemia, but I taught Landon how to serve and love and see the bigger picture."

"In return," said Landon, "I made it my life's mission to fill every desire on her bucket list before she died. Now we are together forever. I can't say it was easy, but I can say it is worth it."

"Hi there guys, my name is Henry Roth and I was a total jerk before I met Lucy and determined to love her even with her disabilities. Our life has its ups and downs, too."

Henry's beautiful blonde wife smiled at him sweetly. "Henry keeps our love alive by making every day a first date for us. I can't remember why he does this, but it's so sweet. He really works hard to keep the romance alive."

Now Mustafa asked the jurors to come to the stand so they could discuss their findings. However before a verdict could be reached, Jack grabbed Diane's hand, he knelt on one knee as he looked deeply into her eyes.

"I've never been frozen in carbonite, but I know if I had been, you'd have dressed in your bathing suit and sat at the feet of Jabba the Hutt for me. I just know it."

Diane felt her eyes welling up with tears. "And if I ever forgot how fun it was to run off to the shady trees and let you do as you please, I'm really sorry. I'm not very good at writing, but I'll write our love story in a Notebook too."

Everyone turned to watch them, as they twined their fingers together and each couple recalled moments in their lives when they wanted to throw in the towel too.

Jack leaned in and kissed Diane on the lips gently. "Let's go home, honey." He said and she nodded eagerly.

With fond smiles and some thumbs up, they all exited the courtroom.

The jury began to file out, as Mustafa hit the gavel against the arm of his throne. They passed the next set of jurors coming in, Cinderella's dress swished against the throne and she smiled apologetically.

They all looked up as Jack and Diane held the door for the next plaintiffs.

"Wow, did you see that?" Jack's eyebrows touched the top of his scalp. "I think that was Bella and Edward. I thought they had it going for a thousand years."

Diane looked back. "Yeah, but watching each other eat for that long might be really disgusting."

*****