CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE:
WHEN LIFE GIVES YOU LEMONS
(episode six: parcel nine)

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HAVEN HAD EVERY INTENTION of avoiding Kie and Sarah, for as long as she was plausibly able to. She didn't show up at the Chateau the next morning like the pogues had planned. Instead, she woke up after her mother left to spend the day with a friend, lying in bed with Rosie cuddled into her side. For a while, she didn't even answer the door when someone came knocking, but at the familiar sound of Pope's voice calling out to her, she slowly got up to answer him. She might've been mad at Kie, but he didn't deserve to be ignored.

And that was how she found herself stuck on a boat with Kiara Carrera and Sarah Cameron.

After several minutes of Pope trying to convince her to spend the day out on the water with him (looking back on it, she should've known when he had the HMS Pogue at his house instead of the Chateau that something strange was happening) she gave in and changed into a simple bikini, throwing on a button-up crop top and a skirt before going on their way. They weren't even driving for five minutes when Pope received a text message, sighing before changing directions.

"Hey, we have to make a slight detour," he said as Haven looked at him questioningly. "John B just texted. He and JJ took my dad's boat out fishing and the engine gave out."

"Alright," she muttered. "It won't take too long to fix, will it?"

"Shouldn't," he shrugged before smiling tensely when she turned to face him. "Depends how much they've messed it up."

"Oh, god, okay."

They sat in silence for a moment before Haven discarded her shirt as the heat began to get uncomfortable. She looked away for just a second and turned back around to unfortunately familiar surroundings; Figure Eight, with Kie's house not far off in the distance.

"Pope..."

"Look, I know you don't want anything to do with her," he sighed before she could berate him. "But she's the best with this sort of stuff. You won't have to be around her for long."

"You promise?"

"I promise, Haven."

Just as he said that, they pulled up at the Carrera jetty. Kie was waiting at the end of it, her smile falling when she noticed the dark-haired girl sitting tensely at Pope's side. Clearly, she hadn't known Haven would be there either.

"Hey, Pope," she greeted as she clambered over the edge of the boat. "Hey, Have..."

Haven just scowled and turned her head in the opposite direction. If she absolutely had to, she'd deal with Kie's presence, but that didn't mean she'd talk to her. She heard both Kie and Pope sigh before the former wandered to the front of the boat, sitting down and also turning away from her. They drove the rest of the way to wherever John B and JJ were in silence.

After what felt like an eternity, Mr Heyward's boat appeared in the distance. They were parked on the outskirts of the marsh, nobody else in sight for miles. Just their luck. Pope pulled up right beside the bigger boat, drifting in place so that Kie could climb over the side.

"You coming?" Haven asked as she went to follow her.

Pope just awkwardly gestured to the wheel. "I gotta park this thing."

"Okay..."

Haven dropped down onto the other deck, eyebrows raising in surprise as she noticed Arden Kim stretched out across a ledge with a pair of sunglasses on and a black bikini showcasing her bump.

"Ard, what are you doing here?" she asked as she made her way over to her, shadow blocking the sun from Arden's line of vision.

"Uh, tanning?" she chuckled nervously, which prompted a confused frown to form on her friend's face. Haven's suspicions were beginning to grow. Arden was acting weirder than usual, and Pope was still yet to leave the HMS Pogue, which Haven noticed was slowly drifting further away. Something was happening...

"What have you done?" she sighed.

"...Remember that prank I pulled on our trig teacher?"

Oh.

Haven's face fell as she thought back to her first few weeks at the Kook Academy. Back when she and Arden were new friends, Arden had done everything she could to break the awkward atmosphere between them. Don't get her wrong, Arden Kim didn't take a lot of things in life seriously, but school was something she'd always made sure to disregard as a waste of time. Because of this, she didn't hesitate to glue (yes, you're reading this right) their trigonometry teacher to his chair just to get a laugh from Haven. The week's suspension and her mother's outraged lecture were well worth it.

At first, Haven didn't understand why Arden was reminding her of this. Then it hit her.

"Arden, you can't glue Kie to the engine for what she did," she hissed and ran after the girl in question.

The engine room was boiling hot as the sun shone relentlessly through the tiny windows. John B and JJ were cramped up by the door as Kie took over their minimal space, kneeling on the ground to take a closer look at the exposed engine. Haven's eyes went wide as she pushed John B aside and grabbed Kie by the arm.

"Wait, don't touch that," she shouted, looking around frantically for any signs of Arden's beloved super glue. Nothing seemed seriously wrong, but who knew what Arden had done. She could be ruthless when she wanted to be.

"What's wrong?" Kie frowned before two loud splashes were heard just outside. "Was that..."

John B and JJ were long gone, cheering as they swam away from Mr Heyward's boat and towards the HMS Pogue. Haven and Kie watched them in confusion before it suddenly clicked. Pope hadn't wanted to spend the day with Haven. It was a ploy to get her and Kie to talk. And if Kie was there, that meant...

The floor shook as somebody slammed their fists against the hatch leading below the deck. A frantic voice cried out, "John B! Arden! Someone get me out of here!"

"Oh, you're joking," Haven groaned as she leaned down to open the door. Sarah Cameron looked back at her in confusion, her face slick with sweat as she stumbled out into the open air. 

"What are you doing here?"

"What do you think?" she scowled. "We've been tricked.

They hurried over to Kie at the front of the boat, staring in disbelief as John B waved at them and JJ laughed.

"Are you serious?" Sarah screamed.

"Deadly, Saz," Arden called back with a cackle.

"Guys, this isn't funny," Haven grumbled, shooting a glare at Pope before he looked away with a wince. "Get your asses back here now!"

"We can't," John B shook his head. "Not until you three work out your problems."

Kie let out a huff of rage. "I will kill every single one of you."

"You can't kill me," Arden smirked as JJ wrapped a towel around her shoulders. "Not if you want to be jellybean's godmother."

"Oh, fuck that," Haven scoffed. "I'm coming for you, Arden Kim."

"Come on, you can't just leave," Sarah whined as the distance between them grew, forcing the others to shout so they could be heard.

"There's food in the cabin and JJ rolled a blunt," Pope called out. Haven rolled her eyes at him. What did he expect them to do? Sit down and talk about their trauma over some shitty sandwiches?

"Hydroponic!"

"This is ridiculous," Sarah shook her head, kicking off her shoes and stripping out of her shirt and jeans to reveal her swimsuit.

Kie sighed before copying her actions. "Well, I would rather drown than stay here with you, so..."

Haven sat back and watched them with furrowed brows, taking a seat on a nearby chair while Sarah clambered up onto the edge of the boat and dove right into an oyster bed. There was no point, the boat was already too far out of earshot, and there was nothing they could do that would change their minds now. They were stuck with each other, but Sarah hadn't gotten the memo yet.

Suddenly, she let out a scream and disappeared below the surface, reappearing a moment later with a pout. "I got stung by a jellyfish," she wailed, causing Haven to rub her temples in frustration. Just the sound of her voice was going to give her a headache.

"Dramatic."

She tripped her way up the ladder, revealing to Haven and Kie an irritated red wound on her torso. Haven had to admit, it did look like it hurt her a lot, but she couldn't bring herself to sympathise in any way. Neither did Kie, who just rolled her eyes and sat down on the edge of the boat.

"Well, you did swim right into a man-o-war, so I don't know what you thought was going to happen."

Sarah glowered at them. "Thank you for the help."

"Look, neither of us owe you anything," Haven glared as the blonde dropped down onto the deck, clutching at her side as if pressure would do anything to ease the pain. "Your stupid actions had stupid consequences. Deal with it."

Silence. Sarah didn't know what to say, so instead she pouted and turned to Kie. "Hey, Kiara. You know what they say about curing jellyfish stings?"

"No way."

"Haven?"

"Did you not hear me?" she grumbled. "I'm not pissing on you. This isn't FRIENDS."

"Oh, come on—"

"I have a better idea," Kie cut her off suddenly, disappearing inside for a minute before returning with JJ's blunt and a lighter in her hands.

Haven didn't normally smoke weed. In fact, she detested it, and always made sure to let JJ know that whenever he smoked one too many blunts in front of her. Still, she decided to make an exception just this once. There was no way she'd be able to sit through hours on end in Sarah Cameron's presence without being at least a little bit high.

The three girls moved to sit on the ledge Arden had been sun tanning on. The sky was a light shade of pink as morning transitioned into afternoon, bringing with it a cool breeze that was just enough relief from the heat. Sarah was still crying about her injury, but she went quiet as Kie held the blunt in front of her face, saying, "It's for the pain."

"JJ, bless," she sighed, proceeding to watch eagerly as Kie held the lighter at one end of the blunt and perched the other between her lips. She took two long drags, breathing out a mouthful of grey smoke before holding it out to Sarah. However, just as she went to take it, Kie changed her mind and brought it back for another hit. Sarah's eyes narrowed in annoyance while Haven snickered. "Really?"

Eventually, it was Sarah's turn and she took several long drags eagerly. Haven watched her as she immediately coughed it back up, knowing for a fact that Sarah had never touched a blunt in her life until then. "Go easy, okay? It's JJ's friend's Cripple. That stuff hits different." But Sarah ignored her, taking another drag before sighing in relief. It was working, but at what cost?

The hours seemed to slow down as the sky grew dark. Haven had developed a proper headache as Sarah either hacked up a lung as the smoke went down the wrong way or giggled to herself while staring at the sky. It was a nightmare, one Haven would undoubtedly be stuck with overnight considering how much time had passed by since the others left them. Just fucking great.

"Wow," Sarah was mumbling to herself. Suddenly, she threw her arm around Haven's shoulders and giggled again. "Hey, guess what?"

"What?" Haven grumbled as she swatted her away.

"Would you rather... have — I was imagining you like this just now. It was pretty funny. Would you ima — would you rather... have nipples for eyes or eyes for nipples? Imagine if you get really old and your nipples — Your boobs get saggy, and your nipples, if they were your eyes, you could see if your shoes were untied."

Haven just sighed and clenched her eyes shut. 

"Is this like your first time smoking or something?"

"No..."

"That's it, I'm out," she shook her head, shuffling away from the blonde's side to sit on the other side of the deck. "This is my first time too, but at least I can handle it."

Sarah just pouted before turning to look at the girl remaining at her side. "Hey, Kiara—"

"Oh, my god," Kie snapped. "Enough of the 'hey, Kiara' bullshit."

This was the moment that John B and the others had wanted for them. To finally talk out their problems. Haven wasn't so sure she was ready. Would she ever be, really?

"Why'd you do it?" she asked with so much hurt in her eyes that Haven's own heart panged.

"Why did I do what?"

"We were best friends. You, me, Haven and Arden against the world. We stole beers from your dad's fridge, we watched movies in Arden's home cinema, we cried about boys and girls... And the next thing I know, I'm watching your birthday party happen from instagram."

"It was one party."

Haven couldn't help but scoff, Sarah immediately faltering under her gaze. "It wasn't and we both know it. That party ruined my life."

"Haven—"

"Did you even care? About either of us?"

"Of course I did."

"Why don't I believe you? You let Kie take the blame for the party being busted. Then you stood by and watched as I grieved my dad, and what Kelce did to me. You didn't say anything, not even a frigging 'I'm sorry for your loss.' You just cut us out like we meant nothing to you. But yeah, you definitely cared, Sarah."

"What did we even do?" Kie added on. "I mean, really, what did we do?"

"You liked me," Sarah snapped, causing both girls to fall quiet.

"...What?"

"When people get close to me, I feel trapped, and... I bail. And then I blame them for it. I'm really sorry..."

"No, you're not," both girls turned to look at Haven. She glared at Sarah in disbelief, knuckles white as her fingernails dug into her palms. "I'm sorry, Sarah, but that's such a shitty excuse. I understand feeling trapped, I do. But sometimes, human decency needs to surpass your anxiety."

"I know," she nodded with honesty that Haven really hadn't expected. "And I don't expect you to forgive me straight away, but know that I mean it when I say that I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that to Kie, and I shouldn't have done that to you."

Haven felt the first signs of tears in her eyes. "I didn't expect you to be there for me all the time, but you said nothing. Nothing, Sarah. Do you realise how alone that made me feel?"

"I was a bad friend," she said. "What Kie said yesterday was right. I didn't tell anyone what I saw Kelce do, and I was the reason your dad even came to my house in the first place. And it sounds selfish, I know, but that scared me. I'm sorry."

For once, Haven just wanted to let go. Sarah was close to crying too, hands twitching like she wanted to reach out and cling to Haven for dear life. The high was long gone as truth rang cold.

"Haven, I miss you," she whispered. "I miss both of you. Do you think there's a chance that we could be okay again?"

Haven just stayed quiet, wiping at her eyes as Kie spoke. "Honestly, I don't know."

"Haven?"

Did she want to forgive Sarah? She'd already forgiven Kie. The two definitely needed to talk, but Haven knew she regretted it. Sarah, on the other hand, was a stranger wearing an old friend's face. But beneath the light of the moon, with Sarah's hand finally grabbing onto her's, she longed for her friendship again.

"I don't know either," she admitted, finding sickening satisfaction in the way Sarah's face crumbled. "But I'd like to try."

Nothing else was said after that. Haven's chest wracked with sobs as she retreated inside for a moment, Sarah reaching for the last of the blunt as Kie followed her. If there was any time to get everything out in the open, it was now.

"Haven, I'm sorry," she said after a minute of just standing in the doorway watching her cry. "Really, I am. I shouldn't have used your pain as a way to hurt Sarah. It wasn't fair of me, and I totally betrayed your trust—"

"Yeah, you did," she cut her off as she finally turned to look at her. "Imagine I was in your place. And I told everyone what Sarah did to you just to justify my anger. How would you feel?"

Kie sighed. "I'd be really hurt."

"Well, at least you'd feel a fraction of how I'm feeling right now."

"Have, I want us to be okay." Brown met brown as Kie surged forward to close the gap between them. "I don't want to lose you too."

Haven sighed, that familiar longing back in her chest. She hugged Kie before she could get another word out. "We're okay, Kie. I just need some time. But I promise you, you haven't lost me."

Kie's hands curled around Haven's waist for a moment, shoulders slumping in relief. Then, out of nowhere, she was talking again. "You know, I used to like you, too." Haven pulled away in surprise, causing Kie to chuckle and nod in earnest. "Yeah, I know you used to like me." Haven didn't know what to say, just blinking at her. Kie let out a sigh then, squeezing her arms tight before letting go. "I'm glad you're my friend, Haven."

And with that, she retreated back outside to join Sarah under the stars, leaving Haven alone with her head full and a gaping chasm in her chest.