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Lilah listened to tonight's argument with a numbness that had taken twenty-one years to perfect. The fights were a recent, unwelcome change, but they were better than the looming death that had plagued their house for years.

It was hard listening to her mother's coughs because that served as a reminder that the stress of the argument probably wasn't helping.

Standing in the hall, Lilah watched the crack of the door, debating going in. She wasn't sure what she could say or how to intervene. Fate made that choice for her when the door slid open, and her younger brother's tall frame lumbered out then ran.

"Gus?" her mother called, too weak to manage more beyond a whisper. The trembling hand on the doorframe pulled away in time. "Can you find him?"

"No. Let him stew for a little bit," Lilah's father said. "And you're getting worse. So come lie down. I want to get you some more food. You can't stand to lose much more weight."

Rarely called upon, but always eager to be useful, Lilah risked going to the door. When she peered through, the sight of her parents gave her pause.

Her father's blue hair came from a troubled youth—he couldn't change it. The slender, near dead figure in his arms looked like a stranger. It wasn't often Lilah saw them together.

The stark contrast just made it worse—her father's strong, brawny figure, clinging to the delicate body of his dying wife.

"I..." Lilah said, disturbing their calm, "I can make some food."

An audible gasp preceded the hood of the robe going up to cover her mother's stringy, black hair and gaunt face—as if that would block out the sight of the woman's illness.

"I told you to announce yourself a little sooner," her father scolded.

Lilah struggled to respond but could only repeat herself. "I can make something."

"No. No thank you," her mother wheezed. Those words left her winded. "Please find Gus-Gus. He took the news rather hard."

"Attention: new arrivals from stasis," DAWN announced.

The computer didn't often seem imposing. Today, it took all life out of the room.

"Another one?" the frail woman asked her husband. "Aren't they a little frequent?"

Lilah's father kissed the top of the robe and answered, "Don't you think about that, Lee. It'll get you worked up. Come let me feed you."

"And Gus-Gus?"

At her father's sigh, Lilah spoke up finally. "I'll...I'll get him. He can't be far."

"Don't you have work?" her father asked.

She did, but with her mother's condition getting worse each day, she feared going into work only to be called back to a deathbed. No. She wanted to stay home...needed to.

"Go to work after you find Gus. Do you understand?" her father said.

It wasn't like him to be this gruff. He was scared. Lilah wondered if he even noticed how he'd been pushing her and Gus further away to hide that fear of loss.

That might mean things were on the edge. She couldn't leave. She refused to—not with so many things unsaid and so many questions unanswered. A million utterances of I'm sorry needed to come and go. Many of those she'd give, but a few she expected in return. She couldn't leave. Not even for her job.

"I'll...I'll find Gus," Lilah said again.

"And then work?"

Without answering, she bowed her head and walked past him. Gus was a bigger worry. He was taking this all the hardest.

The badge on Lilah's shoulder flashed, and she turned it toward her.

"Shit," she whispered. "Not now." Instead of answering the work request, she walked down the hallway faster and eventually broke into a run.

The computer sounded, "Attention enforcer. Your team needs you."

Maybe, but not as much as her family.

(Continue this excerpt of the first chapter in the book "We Can Go Back" ) Link in the comment →

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