A/N: the brother of Frieza returns with his mother to earth to get revenge on the ones who killed him.

(And yes, that image you see there is what metal cooler looks like in this).

https://youtu.be/CnCQjsoRLro

(Capsule Corporation in West City).

Bulma: hey, Yamcha. Thanks for coming by and picking up the rest of your stuff.

Yamcha: hey, no problem. I mean, didn't have to, you know, throw out most of it...

Bulma: eh, you were dead and it was taking up space.

Oolong: much like your corpse.

Yamcha: ha-ha. Ah, where did you bury me anyway?

Bulma: bury?

In the place when it's always been, Yamcha's corpse was still decaying, with flies around it.

Oolong: so, Bulma. How's the single life treating you?

Bulma: It's been nice, actually. Had a dream about (Y/N) last night...

Yamcha: you slut!

Bulma: we were walking in a park...

Yamcha: you slut!

Bulma: okay, first off, we're not even dating. Second of all, I don't even like him that way.

She said almost as if she was lying. Meanwhile, in the atmosphere of earth, the spaceship that Vegeta took was seen falling in the distance.

Bulma: Third, he's gone in some far away world with Goka and I'll likely never see him again.

The spaceship crash landed in Capsule Corporation.

Vegeta: I'm back, bitches!

A few moments later, Bulma, Yamcha, Puar, and Mrs. Briefs were in front of the spaceship.

Mrs. Briefs: sweetie, roll out the cot! I think we have a visitor!

Vegeta began to exit the spaceship.

Dr. Briefs: Is she colored?

Mrs. Briefs: I'm not sure, I never open my eyes!

Yamcha: hey! You've got a lot of nerve coming back here!

Vegeta: oh, a valet. Neat. I'm not tipping.

Yamcha: don't you remember who I am? We fought when you landed on Earth!

Vegeta: no, I fought Kakarot and (Y/N). Nappa fought everyone else. Well, except for that one scrub who got killed by a Saiba......

She stopped herself and rememberd who Yamcha was and began to laugh hysterically.

Yamcha: oh, yeah!? I dare you to come over here and laugh at me!

Vegeta landed right in front of Yamcha's face.

Vegeta: Ha. Ha. Ha.

Yamcha: yeah, see, now we can laugh together.

He said nervously.

Bulma: okay, seriously, we have enough to clean up without a pool of Yamcha's urine. You, come with me.

Vegeta: what? Why?

Bulma: because you need a shower; I could smell you from East City.

Vegeta started muttering to herself.

Vegeta: ...smell you from East City...

She continued muttering.

Yamcha's mind: yeah, you better run...

(Timeskip).

Vegeta was taking a shower at Bulma's place.

Bulma: hey, I'm setting out some new clothes for you and I'm gonna wash your armor!

Vegeta: fine, but be careful! Those are dry-clean only!

Bulma: whatever!

She puts Vegeta's jumpsuit in the washer.

Vegeta: no, seriously! They lose their elasticity!

Bulma was already gone.

Vegeta: Hello?

Bulma was currently now on the balcony.

Krillin: so, Vegeta's living here now? That's neat.

Yamcha: the woman single-handedly responsible for murdering most of the entire gang is taking a shower in the other room. "Neat" is not the first word that comes to mind.

Bulma: okay, so I just got a look at Vegeta's ass, and besides being surprisingly nice, she's got this weird hole.

Yamcha: well I mean, that's no surprise I guess.

Bulma: no, you idiot! I mean a hole above that one!

Yamcha: ...You mean she's a dude?

Vegeta: Earth Lady! Where's the cleansing powder?

She yelled from inside the shower.

Bulma: we don't have that here. We have soap.

Vegeta: the hell is soap?

Bulma: It's that yellow block there made of animal fat.

Vegeta: that sounds awesome !

She took a bite and then spluttered.

Vegeta: this tastes nothing like what you just said!

Yamcha: okay, I changed my mind, this is pretty neat.

Vegeta: Is that the beta-male?

Bulma: no, Krillin just got here!

Vegeta: oh, God, they're breeding! I swear, the only thing I hate more than weaklings is the color pink!

She was heard turning off the shower and getting out before noticing the new set of clothes Bulma left for him.

Vegeta: AAAAAAAAHHHHH!

(Meanwhile, in Space).

Queen Cold's ship was approaching Earth.

Queen Cold: There it is; the home of the brute who dared laid hands on my dear pince.

Cooler: Indeed, mother.

Queen Cold: What a pretty little blue pearl it is. What was it called? Ee-arth?

Cooler: actually, it's pronounced Earth, Mother.

Queen Cold: Really? But there's an "a" in it. I'm just going to keep calling it Ee-arth.

Cooler: It doesn't really matter anyway. Soon, it will have a brand-new name: Trash heap.

(Back to the balcony on Earth).

Vegeta: son of a bitch!

Yamcha: what, still ticked off about the shirt?

Vegeta: no, I'm..... well, yes actually, I'm absolutely livid. But that's not the point! That idiot Kakarot failed! Frieza's Brother is still alive!

(Meanwhile).

Tien and Chiaotzu were in the wilderness.

Tien: Chiaotzu, do you feel that? There are two enormous power levels approaching the planet!

Chiaotzu: yeah, see... Last time this happened, I blew myself up.

Tien: yeah, I was gonna ask you to hold off on that this time.

Meanwhile, with Piccolo destroying some glaciers.

Nail: (see, now we just have to carve out an area, and then we'll start building the... hey, do you feel that?)

Piccolo: Frieza?! NOOOOOOOOOO!

Nail: (okay, I'm right here-- please stop yelling! And Secondly, that doesn't seem to be Frieza)

Piccolo: what makes you say that?

Nail: (well, it's basically far higher than hers last time I remembered feeling it).

Piccolo: any ideas then?

Nail: (relative)?

Piccolo: great, I'd had to deal with daddy just because I hurt his little girl.

He said mockingly.

(With Logan).

Logan: oh you haft to be fucking kidding me. I thought these space lizard mother fuckers were taken care of.

He soon took off. At Gohan's house, He was on the phone with Krillin.

Krillin: oh, God, Gohan, it's him, it's him, it's him, it's him, it's him, it's him, it's him, it's him, it's him, it's him, it's him, it's him!

Gohan: Krillin, you haven't even met Cooler.

Krillin: Gohan, the fact that there's someone far stronger than the person who killed me is horrifying on it's own.

Gohan: Chi-Chi, where's my Saiyan suit?

(At Bulma's place).

Vegeta: woman, where is my Saiyan suit?

(Back to Gohan's).

Chi-Chi: It's under your bed!

Gohan: thank you! (puts on his armor)

(back to Bulma's).

Bulma: It's in the wash!

Vegeta: you bitch!

(Timeskip).

Gohan, Krillin, Vegeta, Yamcha, Tien, and Chiaotzu all flying off and arriving at the spot where Cooler is expected to land.

Vegeta: all right, judging by how quickly his power level is closing in, he should be here in about...

Yamcha: hey, so I need to talk to you about Bulma.

Vegeta: you cannot be serious!

Yamcha: look, we're not dating anymore, but still, she's a really close friend and......

Vegeta: You are actually doing this right now? I'm a chick as well you know!

Yamcha: which means she's getting desperate!

Vegeta: my god, why did she use to date an idiot like you?!

Bulma arrived at the area.

Bulma: hey, guys!

Vegeta: oh, great, and she's here, too! Why don't all you idiots just start showing up?

Krillin: hey, Vegeta!

Vegeta: I was f**king kidding!

Tien and Chiaotzu soon arrived at the area.

Yamcha: Tenshinhan! Chiaotzu!

Tien: huh. Looks like we got here in time. Oh, hey. Vegeta.

Vegeta: what?

Tien: nice shirt.

Vegeta: and there it is! Now all we need is the Namekian and we'll have the whole Potpourri of Pathetic.

Piccolo: uh, been here the whole time, actually.

Vegeta: oh, what do you want, a medal?

Piccolo: nice shirt.

Vegeta: kiss my ass, green man!

Piccolo: yeah, it's the kind of shirt that really screams..... "gasps" He's coming!

Queen Cold's ship arrived on Earth, flying above the group, and started landing a far distance away from everyone.

Krillin: he's landing over there!

The ship soon started backing up

Piccolo: wait, now he's pulling back!

The ship then moved forward.

Krillin: no, now he's...going back that way...

The ship kept going back and forth.

Krillin: What's he doing?

The ship eventually landing in an area)

Cooler: we can park anywhere we want you know, mother!

Queen Cold: now, son, if this is anything like that jockstrap incident your sister dealt with, we don't want to get boxed in.

(Back over to the group).

Krillin: so has anyone else noticed that there are two power levels around the same strength on that ship?

Vegeta: yeah, it's probably his mom.

Yamcha: he has a mother?!

Piccolo: makes sense. Everyone has a mom... 'Cept me.

Logan: from what I was told, your kind don't have women and your Father was killed by Goka when she was a kid.

Vegeta: ha! Your Father's dead!

Piccolo: so's yours.

Vegeta: ha!

Gohan: so, essentially, we have two opponents of equal strength that my father could only beat after fulfilling an ancient alien prophecy. Does anyone in particular know exactly what they're doing here besides trying not to LOSE IT?

Yamcha completely lost it.

Yamcha: guys, we are so screwed! I don't know what we're gonna do! I mean, this is completely crazy! Why did I come here again? We're going to die! I'm gonna die again! I don't wanna die again! Once was bad enough! Oh, my God...!

Logan: am I gonna have to start bitch slapping this guy like I did Krillin back on Namek?

Krillin: you know, if he weren't doing it, I would.

Vegeta: we don't need Kakarot or anyone else. You have enough badass Saiyan on your team as it is. Now, if you'll excuse me, you can all just sit on your hands while I go up there and take care of business.

Gohan: or, maybe we could hide our power levels, sneak closer to them, survey the situation from up lose, and perhaps catch them by surprise?

Vegeta faced away from Gohan.

Vegeta: y'all are bitches.

Logan: you died to Frieza. What makes you really think you'll fair any better against her much stronger brother?

Vegeta: Because I'm the princess of saiyans, bitch.

Logan: and it's stuff like that which got you killed.

Meanwhile, in a spot near Queen Cold's ship, a person appeared near one of the rocks close to the ship. This individual was a young man named Frostwing ().

Frostwing: ah, finally. After a few attempts, I finally managed to make it to this universe.

He soon heard noises coming from the direction of Queen Cold's ship.

Frostwing: hm?

He peaked his head over the ledge of a rock

Queen Cold: well, son, is this what you were expecting?

Cooler: god, this is droll. We're completely out in the space sticks... There's not even a Space Radio Shack... Much less a Space Best Buy.

(If you're wondering why Cooler isn't malfunctioning, he was built by different mechanics in his system. Why? He's a prick, that's why).

Queen Cold: And wouldn't you know it, no place to buy more RAM!

Cooler: but I won't lie, mother. I'm absolutely ecstatic. While I'll take immense satisfaction in killing the moneky's friends and family. My personal agenda is with the disgusting slimy green dragon. Speaking of which, soldiers, the scavenger hunt will proceed as such: normal human heads are worth one point, Namekian heads are worth twenty, filthy half-Saiyan brats: fifty. And if you find any miserable, odious, insubordinate, full-blooded monkey garbage...you win! Well, off you go!

Queen Cold's Men: Yes, sir!

A couple of Queen Cold's soldiers move out only to get cut down by a mysterious young man who floated down and landed in front Cooler, Queen Cold, and the rest of Queen Cold's men before sheathing his sword.

???: so, how many points are those?

Frostwing: hm, this should be interesting.

A/N: And now they're fucked.