Hostel Life By AkoOku

I'm not sure what to make of this story or how to describe it. The story itself is entertaining. I got up to chapter 4 in this book. It was easy to read and the chapters flowed well. There were some grammar issues but nothing to distract too much from the overall story. The punctuation was pretty good actually. I mean, this author knows what a dialogue tag is and how to use it. Great verb usage, low amount of adverb, nice.

The book cover was great and so was the graphics. I do have some criticism with regard to the realism of some things. For example, Debbie and Nathan take a tumble down WOODEN stairs and get up like it's no big deal. No broken bones, no broken necks? What? Also, Debbie's zero to sixty penchant for violence is very anime-level extreme, and that does NOT dull with time. In fact, her extreme bouts of emotional outbursts increases with each chapter and some are unclear (i.e. Chapter 4 starts with her 'Disgusted and utterly revolted' but I don't really know...why. Even with that, I was still able to keep on.

So what stopped me? Well, there were two things. 1. I just didn't like Debs enough to want to follow her around. When Nathan dipped, I kinda felt like, "Aww, can't I follow him around instead?" But I waited, thinking he'd come back but he didn't. 2. Each chapter seems to tack on more and more characters and I just didn't connect with them. We meet the dean's daughter, then in the next chapter, she's not there. Hmmm, yet another character comes. It was hard to keep emotionally invested.

In the end, I decided it was okay not to continue because while the story was fun for the most part, I don't really read incest stories and let's face it, Debbie and Nathan were...pretty suspect. I mean, the opening scene has her describing her brother's body as toned, lean and muscular, and not in medical terms. He's in nothing but his boxers (he's 18, she's 16) and he's wrestling her to the ground, where he pins her down, demanding supplication (a common habit of his, apparently). Then she's in the shower in her bedroom, he's outside the shower door (not the bedroom door), she exits with the towel wrapped around her (later on we find out it's her HAIR she's got it wrapped on. What about the rest of her? Unclear) and he's got one of her lace bras on his head as a prank... :-/ Oh...kay. Despite this, I was going to keep on but when Nathan and Debbie got separated, she pined for him, and I was like, MAN this is uncomfortable. So....uncomfortable. So when old characters I'd become interested in left and new ones I didn't know came, it was the perfect time to disengage and I did.

On top of that, it's a bit unclear what the story is about (what Debbie or Nathan wants). The author's talented and I wouldn't mind checking out something else from him/her in the future. I think others might really enjoy this piece though—the punctuation's on point! It reads like a quirky fun story.