It was a good thing that Parker was the one driving. My hands were already shaking enough. I didn't need the added stress of driving and not killing us both. 

"It came so soon," I said quietly, looking over at Parker. He was acting calm, but we had both been running around the house yelling a few hours earlier.

It was something that we had wanted for so long. We both wanted this more than anything in the world.

I looked in the backseat at the car seat that was sitting behind the driver's seat. 

"What if she hates us both? Or what if Allie decides that she wants to keep her?" I asked.

"Seb. Allie has made it very clear that she doesn't want kids of her own. She said, and I quote, 'I'm fine with being the cool aunt who goes on vacations all the time,'" 

Allie had agreed to be a surrogate for us. It was surreal. We were having a daughter. With some help from me, we were going to have a baby with features from both of us. I was excited, but also so scared. 

We were both at good places in our careers. I was a therapist for kids. I helped kids who were in worse situations than I was, and I loved doing it. There's really nothing that can compare to knowing that you made a difference in someone's life. Sometimes I get letters from kids I've treated before. Some of them are doing amazing now.

Parker's a science teacher at the same high school he went to. He coaches the swim team, and they're really good. He's even said they're better than his team was. 

We had a nice house. A dog. We were in the perfect place to have a baby, but both of us were still so scared. I for one, was terrified I would make a big mistake that would actually hurt her. 

"We're gonna be parents," I said.

"I'm terrified," Parker said. "We didn't even decide on a name yet!" 

"We can decide after she's born. Speaking of that, you better drive faster! I don't want to exactly miss the birth of our daughter,"

Our daughter. It felt so weird to say. We had been preparing for this moment for months now. There was a painted and decorated nursery in the bedroom down the hall from theirs. We had everything that we were going to need. Everyone told us that we were ready, and I knew that we were ready. But we couldn't really know what to expect. I didn't think any amount of parenting books could prepare us for the real thing.

"I'm already going five miles over the speed limit. Not wanting to get pulled over here,"

I was going crazy the entire time on the way to the hospital. As soon as we parked the car, we were both running inside.

"Allie Adams?" Parker asked the receptionist.

"You guys the dads?" She asked with a raised eyebrow. "Because she made it very clear that nobody except you two are allowed in there,"

"Yep. That's us," Parker confirmed with a nod.

"Room 349," The nurse said, pointing in the direction of the room.

I walked right next to Parker, holding his hand tightly.

He knocked on the door lightly. When there wasn't a reply, he just opened the door. Allie was on her bed, and she looked exhausted.

"You idiots are lucky I love you, because this is worse than hell!" She screamed as soon as she saw us walk in.

***

The sound of a baby crying filled the room. Parker smiled at Allie. "I love you so much," He said.

I looked at the doctor at the end of the bed, who was holding the baby. Our baby.

"She's a perfectly healthy little girl," The doctor said with a smile. She wrapped her in a blanket and handed her to me carefully.

I was so scared to actually hold her. I was scared that I would accidently drop her, or that I would hold her wrong. The nurse was glad to make sure I was doing it right.

Parker was right behind me as we both looked down at her.

And the second I saw her face, I was pretty sure that my heart doubled in size.

She was perfect in every way that a baby could be perfect.

"She looks like you," Parker said quietly from behind me. It was adorable how he was being quiet.

"It looks like she has your nose," I said.

She was just so tiny. Of course all babies were, but you didn't really get just how tiny until you were actually holding one in your arms. She felt so fragile.

"She already fell asleep," Parker said with a small laugh.

We held her for a few minutes before the nurse said she had to give her a quick checkup. I hated to see her go, but she would be back soon. I turned towards Allie.

"We really can't thank you enough," I said. She looked absolutely exhausted, which made sense.

Allie waved her hand. "Go and get some coffee. You guys look worse than I do. And you better not have chosen some sort of ugly name. I'm not having a niece named Bertha or some shit,"

Parker nodded and wrapped an arm around me as we left the room. "We really need to pick a name," He said. "That sounds like it's just a little important,"

I pulled out my phone. "Well we have our list," I said, opening my notes and clicking the list we had made months ago. Not that we had looked at it very much since then.

Parker looked at them. "They're all so great. How are we supposed to just pick one?"

"We have some time. It's not like we need to pick one right this second,"

"We can't just call her her and she!" Parker said. "So we should probably pick a name sooner than later,"

"How about we just get some coffee?" I asked.

"We're going to be living off a lot of that for a while,"

"Oh yeah," I said. "Last night was definitely our last night of quality sleep. Now it's gonna be diaper changes and feeding in the middle of the night,"

I don't think either of us really minded about not getting much sleep.

I ordered us both a coffee and handed one to him. "This all feels like some really weird dream. It just doesn't feel real, y'know?"

He nodded. "Oh yeah. We're literally parents. Like, we're responsible for someone else's life. My mom is gonna freak out when she finds out she missed today,"

I still hadn't talked to my mom. I didn't think about her anymore. She had decided that she didn't want my in her life so, so long ago. The few times she had tried to reach out, I had ignored her. She didn't deserve any of my attention. 

"My dad's gonna be so happy when he finds out she's here. Then he's gonna get in his car and drive here as fast as he can. How about we not tell them for a few more hours? Because once the grandparents come, it's all over,"

"My dad is a grandpa now," I couldn't help but laugh at that. Dad, if you're reading this, I'm sorry.

***

It wasn't long before we were back in Allie's room. Parker was holding the baby while I looked up some names.

"What about Jillian?" I asked.

"It's pretty, but I don't think she's much of a Jill," Parker said.

"Reid?"

"Sounds too much like a last name,"

"Rachel?"

"Seb, we are not naming our daughter after Rachel Berry. We've been over this,"

"Fine," I said. "What about... Evanna?"

He looked up at me, and then down at her. "What does it mean?"

"Young fighter. In English at least,"

Parker stayed silent for a few minutes. "I like that. A lot actually,"

"Me too," I said. "And it can be Eva for short if she wants,"

Parker smiled. "Hey there Evanna,"

I leaned my head on his arm. "I think I might love her a little more than I love you," I said.

Parker dramatically gasped. "I'm offended. But she's also way less annoying than you are so... same,"

I shook my head. "You're ridiculous,"

We were our own little family, and nothing felt as perfect as that.