Hey Jitterbugs, here is the second Chapter for the week! And it may just be the last one. Two chapters in two Days can you say Holy cow? I can. But my mind is now all jumbled so imma take a day break from this story. Then on Saturday start the next chapter, and also get Axciels and Brydons story updated along with Come To Me since that ones almost done. So i hope yall enjoy! (Again its not edited)> So sorry for any mistakes.

Song:Nickelback- Do this anymore( listened to this whole time). If i made a playlist of what i listened to while writing this story, would anyone care? Just curious.

Dedication:bookcrazi14 ( Your comment on previous chapter oh gosh. Your feelings for Vaughn. Haha.

Well thanks jitterbugs, Tiggermazz

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Chapter Fifteen: Athiss

Athiss slowly shook his head as his hair fell lightly over his eyes. He was glad that he couldn't see his reflection in the mirror that he was now standing in front of. He wasn't sure if he'd be able to handle it. Athiss knew that the tears that he was holding back where about to break free and there was nothing that he could do about it. After all his heart was shattered and like always it will continue to be shattered. It frustrated him that the one causing him all this pain and heartache was the one person that he wanted above all else. Why had his husband thought that doing what he did was the right thing to do?

Does that mean that Athiss himself wasn't pleasing the man? Was this all really his fault in some unknown way. If Athiss could he would make all the pain in his heart go away. He didn't need this, He didn't want this. He was a loyal and trustworthy person was this god's way of punishing him for not being straight? It wasn't his fault he was Gay. He couldn't help who he loved and fell for. Never in his life had Athiss felt like this. That it wasn't okay to be himself. That it was something Taboo to be in a man and man relationship.

Athiss knew that it was just his hurt speaking out. That he didn't really believe all this nonsense that he was thinking. But he couldn't help it. He hurt from head to toe and every part in between. It felt as if his body was ready to fall apart, and there was nothing that he could do to stop it.

Slowly running his tongue over his lip Athiss wondered if he had truly done the right thing by finally telling Vaughn his true feelings. He wasn't sure if giving his husband an ultimatum was a good thing or not. But he couldn't just keep living a lie. Where he pretended that everything was fine. That what Vaughn did for a living wasn't eating him up inside. He just couldn't live with it anymore, and it all came spilling out like it had a will all its own.

Athiss knew that there was a possibility that he would be left behind, because to Vaughn his job was important to him. So important that he was willing to lie and deceive Athiss. Athiss wondered if Vaughn even cared about him at all. No one who says that they love someone so much that they'd do anything for them would have done what Vaughn has. It made Athiss want to curl up and die.

The tears that were silently rolling down his cheeks made Athiss wish that he had someone he could run too, someone who could understand the way he was feeling without them looking at him with a sorrowful expression what Athiss needed was a true friend.

One that would always be there for him through thick and thin. But Athiss knew he had no such person, he was pathetic. He knew that as well. Maybe that was the reason Vaughn did what he did. Maybe it was indeed all of his fault.

Slowly shaking his head Athiss knew that no matter what at the end of this Vaughn would have to make a decision and that made a very sharp life ending pain race through him. Athiss hoped that Vaughn would choose him. But there was a part of him that knew that Vaughn most likely wouldn't chose him. After all Athiss wasn't the most important thing to him. Athiss was nothing but a dirty little secret that Vaughn preferred to keep under wraps.

Athiss knew that he couldn't live as someones secret anymore. Hell he deserves to be happy, to be able to show affection and be shown affection no matter where they were. He didn't like hiding it felt as if he was bound to something that he shouldn't have been.

Taking a few deep breaths Athiss thought bitterly "Had he ever been something important to Vaughn, the man that he loved and wanted to be with until he was a crippled old man?"

Probably not. But that didn't mean that Vaughn meant nothing to him. Vaughn was his sunshine, his sorrow, his heart, his life, his reason for waking up and his reason for living but now all Vaughn represented was heartache, pain, sorrow and his reason for wanting to die. If this is what love is Athiss didn't want anything to do with it. He deserved better. But love wasn't so easy to forget or ignore this Athiss knew from the bottom of his heart.

Athiss slowly shook his head as the tears seemed to come faster and faster as the moments passed. He wished that he could have screamed out yelled out. But he knew that it was all his fault for allowing things to continue on like this for so long. But he was afraid that Vaughn would turn it around on him like he always did.

Everything wrong in their marriage was Athiss fault. But right now Athiss didn't care, Vaughn could believe that all he wanted too. Because Athiss was glad that he finally got everything off of his chest. Even if that meant that he would lose Vaughn forever. It was better to be truthful rather than being fearful of losing the man that he loved.

Sighing softly Athiss made his way from the bathroom as images of Vaughn and Laylia filled his head. How he wished that he could just erase the images, the moans and the look of pleasure from his head, from his heart from every part of him. But he couldn't and that hurt him more than anything.

Was he really not good enough? Could he ever trust Vaughn again, even if he decided to give up being a Porn Star? These were all thoughts that have been plaguing Athiss since the night before. He was happy when the Alcohol seemed to make him forget but now that it was all out of his system all he wanted to do was scream at his husband and tell him to get the fuck out of his sight.

That Vaughn had chose, that he already let Athiss go the night he decided to make love to Laylia.

Athiss knew that it was true, but his heart didn't want it to be so. But no matter what happens from this point on, Athiss knew that their life, their marriage and anything else wouldn't be the same anymore.

Biting his lip Athiss slowly made his way into the room. He didnt want to look at Vaughn, he didn't want to see the tears or the pain that may be etched onto his husbands face. What right did Vaughn have to cry? This mess was all his making. So he should have known it would come to this. Unless the ass thought he'd always be able to hide it from Athiss.

Knowing Vaughn and Cheryl, that was probably his thinking. But Athiss wasn't a fool. He has never been and he wouldn't start now. He knew Vaughn would most likely keep up with this act hoping that Athiss would forgive him. But this is something that wouldn't be forgiven. Not for a very long ass time if ever.

After taking a few calming breaths Athiss spoke :"Lets go home Vaughn." Without waiting for a response Athiss exited the room. Just as he was about to turn the corner that went towards the exit he heard "I'm always here for you Athiss!."

"I never would have thought- that well fuck Vaughn the porn star would be hitched." And to someone like you- i mean fuck what is he thinking messing around with those idiots when he has someone like you."

Athiss looked over at Arenik and smiled. It wasn't a forced smile, it wasn't one that needed explaining. It was one hundred percent sincere. The last time Athiss smiled like this he couldn't remember when but it felt good. Maybe just maybe Arenik is the missing piece that Athiss needed. The one thing that made since. He knew that they just met but there was something about the man that made Athiss take notice. And no matter what Athiss didn't want to lose that.

So reaching into his back pocket and pulling out his wallet Athiss handed the man his card. It was always easier than giving a phone number. As Arenik took the card he heard " I will definitely call you. We are friends for life now Athiss, your enemies are mine and vise versa besides if i ever need a patch up job, i now know where i can go.

Athiss shook his head before saying yes Arenik, just try not to get into too much trouble. And with that Athiss walked away from Arenik and away from the building. Just as he crossed the street he heard footsteps behind him. He didnt want to look. hell he didnt even want to be in the same space as the idiot behind him but he had no choice. It was his only way of getting home, and right now going home and sleeping seemed like the right thing to do.

Even if those dreams were most likely to be nightmares. Athiss couldn't help it.

Neither of them said a thing as they entered the car. Athiss didnt look to his left hell he didnt even want to acknowledge the asshole that he called Husband. He just hoped that Vaughn took everything he said seriously, instead of some joke. Because everything he said was the truth and not some fucking joke. It was meant to take seriously and Vaughn taking Athiss seriously was not something of much occurrence.

Just before they turned into the driveway of the house Athiss looked over towards Vaughn, and then all the hurt, pain and heartbreak came spilling out " How could you do this to us Vaughn, is what we had mean anything to you?"

"Why is it always me chasing after you?"

" Why am i so stuck on someone who doesn't even care?"

" Someone who doesn't see me as their equal. I deserve a lot better then some sexed crazied asshole who broke every god damn rule we set in place. And yet here i am again being the one to reach out."

" You know what Vaughn, if i mean so little to you than let me go. Don't continue hurting me, I deserve a whole lot better than this. "

"I deserve love, and to be shown love."

"You better fucking pray Vaughn, that the bitch doesn't end up carrying your child because so help me if she does- well forget it. I bet none of this matters to you anyways, and with that Athiss unbuckled and was about to get out when he felt Vaughn grip his wrist hard before he heard "" What gives you the right Athiss to say i don't care?"

"That i don't love you? That i will let you go? That is never going to happen you are mine and mine alone. I won't let anyone else have you."

Athiss quickly yanked his wrist out of Vaughn's grip before whispering If you cared Vaughn you wouldn't have made love to her. And before your ass says you didn't don't forget i saw the tape the looks you gave, the moans and everything so don't even think of lying to me and don't think you can touch me so carelessly either fucker.

And with that Athiss swung the car door open before storming up the walk. He didn't care how mean he sounded. All he knew was the fucker he called a husband was a fucking prick who needed a lesson in humanity, in not always playing the damn victim. It was Vaughn's turn to know what it feels like to not ever knowing what was going to happen.

As Athiss entered the house he went straight to there room slamming and locking the door before walking over to the dresser and swiping his hand making all the glass tumble to the floor in a loud clash. He didn't care. He needed any pain to take away from his bleeding heart.

Vaughn didn't fucking care. This was all a game to the asshole. Athiss was sick, he was tired and he was just plain done. There was nothing left for him here. Maybe taking that transfer would be best. He could get away from Vaughn, and Vaughn could be free as well to fuck and do whatever the fuck he wanted to do. Athiss wouldn't hold anyone back. But he also knew that if Layila ended up pregnant and Vaughn turned out being the father then vaughn could kiss Athiss ass goodbye for good with no was to fix shit.

Once he calmed down Athiss made his way over to the bed and laid down with his hands bleeding, his heart sore and he just cried into the pillow hoping that when he passed out he would never wake up again because this pain was worse than anything he's had to endure. He wouldn't wish this on his worst enemy.