17 | Broken Dreaming

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Whenever conversation drifted into silence, Iliana found herself attempting one of two activities.

The first was simple. After shifting into what she suspected to be the center of her cell, she would run her body through a series of exercises. Annoyingly enough, her mind provided memories of Lykos' tips and tricks to maximize effect as she worked. It was determination that kept her moving no matter how strained, stiff, or exhausted her body felt. If she allowed herself to get out of shape because of the circumstances, they would never change. Iliana had to be ready to run, or fight, on a moment's notice.

Occasionally, she would hear Del join her. It was as impossible for her to place how often he worked, just as it was impossible for her to track the passage of time. All Iliana knew was that sometimes, when she paused, she would hear an echo of labored breath from his side of the wall. It was comforting, knowing she wasn't alone, as well as that he must've approved of her passtime if he, too, took part.

The second task was both simpler, and more stressful.

With her fingers gripping a charm so tight it hurt, Iliana would attempt to drop herself into that world of white.

Ever since they'd crossed the border into Reotak, Iliana had found it difficult to follow the charm. The few times she'd almost succeeded, all she'd received was flashes of memory, or feeling. The only bits of memory she'd received Iliana knew must've been Kain's, because she'd recognized familiar folks and sights. The emotions had been harder to identify.

When she grasped the feather, she felt fear, confusion, and guilt. Occasionally there would be a flash of admiration, or worry, but for the most part it was the first three emotions. She got the impression that whomever the feather belonged to was seldom happy, if ever.

The silence charm, her connection to Lykos, always radiated anger, and resignation. Iliana suspected his stay in Reotak had been no better than hers'. That realization had sparked guilt, given her own hand in his current situation. Still, there was nothing she could do about it while imprisoned, so after sending a prayer to Koun for luck, she'd moved on.

Kain's charm, the twin serpents encircling a gem, held a confusing mix of emotions, all of which she found comforting. After all, if he were feeling such emotions, then he must've been alive. Happiness, worry, guilt, impatience, and something hard to identify, they were all things he felt.

The final emotion felt akin to affection. It fluttered through her, leaving her lightheaded and warm. And, for some reason, she was reminded of when she'd first discovered the charm belonged to him. It drew the words of Rhode and Melitta's conversation into her shifting thoughts.

'You like him, right?'

As she'd mused it over, the memory sparked realization over what such a feeling might be. Suddenly feeling like a voyeur, she had quickly moved on from Kain's charm.

The triskele was complicated.

Each emotion that flickered from it felt stronger than any of the other charms. And yet, muted. As if the person it belonged to felt so much, but did their best to shove each of those sensations as deep as they could go. It was an unsettling, yet familiar feeling for her. The most recognizable emotions tended to be worry, irritation, and affection. Uncertainty was also often shifted into the mix, with a worrying intensity. Whomever the charm belonged to, like her, they seemed to feel like they were standing on rapidly shifting ground.

When exhaustion eventually settled on her, it was that charm Iliana held as she drifted into her dreams.

'Give me your hand.'

Each of the people around her were fuzzy, their features looking as if Iliana were peering through an improperly focused spyglass. It made identifying them impossible. Still, she watched them with rapt attention. The scene was unfamiliar, which created a spark of life in her dull hours.

The woman who spoke struck Iliana as beautiful, despite the blurriness. There was a sparkling illuminance to her long, straight locks. They hung to the woman's mid-back, and while the color was muted, Iliana had the distinct impression they were some shade of gold.

The child she spoke to held out their hand. The woman tutted and reached into a box at her side. Iliana drew closer to the scene, peering at the hand. She grimaced. Bloody puncture wounds stained the child's skin in a perfect crescent. They'd been bit by something. A wild animal? A dog?

"What happened?"

Despite the woman's prompt, the child stayed silent. Seemingly reluctant to push them further, the woman slowly went about cleaning, then dressing the wound. The child then cradled their hand as the woman stood and put away her kit.

"I'll ask about finding you different work," she said suddenly. "Watching the hounds is too dangerous for a child of your age. What if one of them were bred improperly? Even Ayo would see the sense in that."

The doubt in her tone gave Iliana the impression the woman didn't believe her own words. Still, she seemed to wear a smile as she knelt before the child, drawing both their hands into her own.

"That sounds good, right? How about the horses? Or the gardens? The gardens would be perfect. No danger in flowers, and I could even teach you the ones I know. It'll be perfect."

For a moment, the child stayed still, then they slowly nodded agreement. The woman sighed, perhaps relieved, before releasing their hands and standing. "Good, good."

She bustled around the room, digging through a dresser that Iliana hadn't noticed before that moment. In fact, she hadn't bothered to look at the room at all. Until then, it had been as unfocused as the people.

It was expensive. The bed was as large as any nobles, with sheets of the finest fabric. The woman stepped over to a vanity that appeared to be the finest craftsmanship, and dug deep into a surprisingly empty drawer. Despite the price of the room, it appeared she didn't own very man adornments.

The woman spun back around and pressed a silver coin into the child's hand.

"For now, go into town. I got permission, earlier, before you came. Said Rae had asked something of you. Stop by the girl's room and get her agreement. Take her with you, if you need. Either way, get something to eat. Please. And, I'll talk to Ayo while you're gone."

As the child took the silver coin, their hand trembled. Whether it was the pain of their wound, or something else, Iliana could not tell.

They stood, still silent, and walked towards the door. Iliana realized, then, exactly how small the child was. They stood at least two feet shorter than her, with a build that made the woman's insistence on food make a lot more sense. Even Natia was less skin-and-bones than that child. Their buzzed hair was an impossible to decipher color, and their fingers tinier than any child's deserved to be.

Outside the door, the child paused just before it shut, looking back despite their previously apathetic attitude. The woman had returned to her vanity, both hands resting against the wood. She must've thought the child was gone, because her entire body trembled with whatever emotion she'd been suppressing until that moment.

"Umae, watch him, please," the woman prayed. "And me. I don't think we can take much more of this." Her voice grew harsher, unshed tears invading the trembling, yet stony tone. "You marked him, so you should protect him. Otherwise, what point is there in being sea-marked?"

Without a word, the child shut the door.

The dream dropped into blackness, then, suddenly color was again. Only, this memory was one Iliana knew. Awareness dropped away as her dreams claimed her.

"Foolish! What will you do if he breaks off the contract because of this?"

A end table crashed to the ground, glass shattering across the plush carpet. It did nothing to calm Kyril's temper as he grabbed a tea-glass and sent it sailing across the room. Fear strangled her chest, but she simply braced herself. She didn't dare dodge, knowing it would only make things worse. His temper calmed when blood appeared.

And appear it did. The cup caught her temple, sending warm crimson crawling down her cheek. She stumbled back, hand flying to the wound. Kyril paused, his own attention zeroing in on the wound. For a moment, he only stared. Then, he laughed.

A smile so cold it seemed to freeze the room crawled across his lips, and in that moment, he terrified her more than any cup could.

"I've an idea. Come, hopefully the Grand Duke is still here."

Kyril grabbed her hand, dragging Iliana into the hall. She stumbled behind him as they passed staff and hallways. No one paused to look at her. If anything, they purposely looked away. It was easier not to see than it was to help.

Finally, they reached the sitting room. Kyril straightened. With the hand that wasn't bruising her arm, he straightened his tie, and dusted off his blazer. Seemingly satisfied a second later, he knocked on the door. An irritated 'come in' followed the sound.

Fear flashed though her, dragging her feet as Kyril tugged Iliana into the room. He pushed her in front of the Grand Duke. He eyed her like an insect as she stumbled through a greeting curtsy. She shivered, fear shifting into terror as Kyril laid his hands on her shoulders. She could hear the smile in his voice as he spoke.

"We had a talk, and Iliana would like to make her mistake up to you. Wouldn't you, Ana?"

The familiar nickname nearly made her sick. Mara's name clogged her throat. Thankfully, he didn't seem to truly want an answer, as he continued without waiting for her.

"She had the thought. Wouldn't the best way to right her mistake be to let you repay it?"

The Grand Duke tilted his head. His dark eyes slipped to Iliana's stinging forehead, seeming to follow the trail of blood down her cheek. His lips quirked.

"Well, if that's what the child wants."

Kyril waved to a maid. Despite the hidden disgust and guilt in the woman's eyes, she simply curtsied at his request and left the room. Iliana trembled, but his steel grip kept her fear from turning into flight.

"I hope that this will make us even, Your Grace."

Kyril's voice barely registered in her ears. Fear had the words flooding in one, and out the other. She had an idea of what was coming, but she couldn't be right, could she? He couldn't be that cruel.

He was her brother.

The man drummed his finger tips on the arm of his chair. "It is a start. Which is the first step to any negotiation. In order for me to put your name forward, you'll have to do better." The man flexed his flushed hand for their viewing. "Perhaps I could meet your wife?"

"Of course. I'm sure she would be happy to receive attention from someone so grand," Kyril replied instantly.

"Then it's settled."

When the maid returned, the maid shoved Iliana's hands over the tea-tray. And beneath the Grand Duke's steely gaze, Kyril upended the boiling teapot.

"Iliana, wake up!"

Screaming jolted Iliana awake. It tore through her throat, staining her surroundings in nothing but the sound. Her hands grasped her hair, the pain of her strained locks helping steady her mind.

"Iliana?"

Del's worried voice pierced her mind as the screams dissolved to sobs. They grasped her chest, heaving it with each heavy cry. Phantom pain lanced her hands, and even as reality strangled the dream, she couldn't cast off the pain.

Gods, how it hurt.

"Shh, quiet, you need to be quiet!"

Del's voice was a strangled whisper-shout, and something about it grasped at her mind. As he continued to call her name, voice soothing despite obvious fear, she managed to pull herself into the present. The memory of pain faded, even if the trembling in her body didn't. Still, she managed to control herself enough to slip into silence.

"Are y--"

The tower door slammed open. There was a cacophony of swears, multiple sets of footsteps, and demands in words she didn't know. Del muttered a reply. Whatever he said must've not been satisfactory, because keys jangled, before the screech of an opening door.

"Wait!"

Iliana jolted to her feet. Her head spun as she sprung towards the noise, her hands enclosing the iron bars of her cell.

"It's fine," Del murmured. "Iliana, it's fine."

It wasn't fine.

The angry guard stormed into Del's cell. His entry was followed by a sicking thud, and shouts in Reotakian. The urge to cover her ears struck her as distinct, violent sounds echoed through the dark. Each one dug into her chest, squeezing it uncomfortably tight.

"Stop!"

What was happening? They were attacking him, why? Because he'd shouted?

Because of her?

There was a murmur by a second voice, followed by a noncommittal grunt. The sounds paused, then there was one final, harsh hit, before the cell door slammed shut.

Someone appeared in front of her. She could sense the black in the darkness. Kikin's power rolled off the person in waves. Hands grasped around hers, digging into her skin. She jerked back, but they didn't let go.

"Silence. Understand?"

The thick, accented words dragged something from within her. A song simmered on her lips, every bit of her body urging her to sing it.

It took her entire being to hold it back. As sweet as revenge would be, singing would get her killed.

Get them killed.

The guard released her and stomped back to the door. It slammed shut. They were alone again.

"Del...?"

A cough. Slow shuffling. Then, finally, the clearing of his throat.

"I'm fine. They don't like it if you make noise. Disrupts whatever they're doing upstairs."

His cheerful voice snapped something inside. She felt raw.

It was too much.

Everything was too much.

"I'm sorry."

"It's fine," he said. Then laughed. "Trust me, I learned that lesson the hard way. I should've warned you. Plus, it's half my part. I was shouting."

To wake me. "Won't Zuher be angry?"

Silence.

"It's unlikely," he replied, his chipperness falling away. "He may have ordered a doctor to visit, but that was only because of what he himself inflicted. Zuher couldn't care less how they treat me, as long as I live."

His words left a heavy air she couldn't immediately overcome.

Eventually, Del was the one to break it.

"Iliana. I need you to understand something."

She'd near collapsed against the bars, but his words drew her taut once more. She felt her way to their shared wall.

"The only reason they aren't allowed to kill me, is because it's only fitting an emperor be the one to dispatch a prince.

"You can't care about what they do to me, Iliana, because I will die here. Grasp onto survival, and nothing else, damn what effect it has on me. Okay?"

She didn't reply right away. Because, what did you say to that? Except--

"No."

She thought he might argue, but instead, Del sighed.

"Get more sleep, I have a feeling you'll need it. Likely, this will be reported. You'll be busy soon."




A/N: A lot happened in this chapter! Hope you enjoyed it all.

Any thoughts on either dream? Ideas about the child? Was the story behind her scars what you expected? Better, worse?

How about Del? Do you trust him? Or is Iliana not being cautious enough?

See you next week. It should be the last special week. After that, we'll see how the scheduling goes. If I can get a buffer, I might continue weekly updates. If not, we'll go back to biweekly.

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