Kingdom of Moutan

1st Year of Yingyong, 1472

The same year the war broke out, the King's mother had died and thus the era had been renamed to Fusang, meaning 'mourning'. After the war was lost two years later, the era was renamed to Huian meaning 'gloomy'.

Xiao Jing Feng's reign was now in its twentieth year and observing the five-year custom, the name of the era was changed to Yingyong meaning 'valiance,' making Feiyan wonder if Xiao Jing Feng was trying to tell her something.

Feiyan leaned her head against the column and drew her fur collared cloak closer to her. Staring out into a night blanketed by falling snow, it was almost quiet even though they were in the middle the Grand Chancellor's manor. For once there was an illusion of solitude, though Feiyan knew that it was exactly that and wouldn't last very long.

She sucked in a breath, enjoying the sharp cold.

Snow...

It reminded her of the snow-white demon of her dream, with his beautiful silver hair, his thick pale eyelashes and the alabaster skin of his body that set off the stark ruby eyes in such a startling way. She recalled how even the base of the horns growing back from his forehead were a red that gradually darkened to shiny ebony at their points.

Mine...

She shivered, remembering his deep voice, his touch on her skin, the hot burning gaze that turned her insides upside down, and the fierceness with which he had claimed her over and over again...and yet his touch had seemed heartbreakingly sad, perhaps even desperate.

Eeek...this is no time to get distracted...

It was the turning of the year.

The envoy had selected the twelve men and women who would make the month-long journey to Shobu's capital in the spring and after that, there was only death. The new year, that was normally a time of happiness and celebration had, for almost ten years, become a time of dread, a time for families to bid farewell to the children who had been chosen as sacrifices.

It had become a tradition for those selected to spend their last two months of freedom doing whatever they wanted. Feiyan had heard that Li Molan and Zhu Yunfeng hadn't left the brothel even once since being selected. She snorted her disgust.

Other than women in the brothel, no one would have had those two and they would have died virgins...but after burning the candle at both ends for two months, they might not even have the strength to make the journey. Idiots.

"What kind of weird things are you thinking about?" teased Gen, settling his elbows down on the railing, startling her with the way he had read her mind. "Why are you out here, instead of inside having a drink with the others?" he asked.

He was trying to sound lightly cheerful, but she knew that his heart was slowly breaking. In all the years that they had been together, this was the first time that they would be separated and both of them knew that they would never see each other again...unlike Hajoon who had been chosen as well, she knew that Gen was taking this very hard, but because they were going off to die in Shobu, he knew better than to say anything.

"Since I'm going to die, I want us to do it before I leave," she said abruptly. "I intend to spend the last few weeks in seclusion, so we should do it now."

Gen choked and then laughed, the sound coming out hollow.

"Ugh...You were never very romantic, but I think that's the first time you've said things so bluntly...and so tactlessly," he chuckled, shaking his head.

"Gen..." she whispered, looking down the railing so he wouldn't see the tears that suddenly stung her eyes.

"I'm sorry...I know...I didn't mean that. Of course, I'll stay with you before you leave...Hajoon will want that too," he sighed.

"No...I want it to be just us...Hajoon is coming with me..."

"Yes, but there won't be any opportunities for you to be with alone with him, and it's my way of saying goodbye to him too."

They were silent for a moment.

When Gen had said it, she'd actually balked at the idea. After that frenzied kiss, she and Hajoon hadn't shared any conversations that weren't related to their work. It would be awkward to do this now, but since she had said as much to Gen, it wouldn't be right to leave Hajoon out of it. It was a goodbye for all of them.

She sighed and then nodded her agreement.

"Try not to look so thrilled," Gen said with irony, puffing air out of his nose. He reached out and wrapped a strand of her hair around his fingers, tugging her close to him.

"You know that's not why..." she muttered as he kissed her softly on the forehead and then dragged his lips lower to cover her mouth.

"Fei..." he whispered against her lips.

"No...Not now!" she begged, struggling to control the emotions inside her.

Gen sighed and released her, simply tucking her into his arms as they stared out into the snowy night.

"Do you remember that time...? When Lord Mu had just brought Hajoon back from Keungang and he was still learning Moutan words?"

Feiyan shook with laughter.

"Haruka said you tricked Hajoon into putting the New Year's banner meant for the rice in the storeroom onto the privy because you told him it meant 'please empty' instead of 'always full'. Haruka was so enraged by how disrespectful it was that she caned you and Hajoon hard enough that neither of you could sit properly for a week..." she snickered, laughing until tears filled her eyes.

"Yeah, and we had to empty all the chamber pots in the manor for two months as punishment," Gen snorted. "You forgot that part."

"Well, I wasn't here for that because Father sent me away with his Highness..." her voice trailed off.

"And then we lost the war and both Xing and Haruka left for Shobu," finished Gen.

"Yes...that...was the first year," she faltered, "...when we still thought we had a chance to kill the demon and assassinate Shobu's king."

"Xing was twenty and Haruka had just turned nineteen...even Lord Mu begged her to lie about her age, but she refused."

"She loved Xing. If it meant going with Xing, then she would have chosen what she had chosen...it's why we shouldn't fall in love with each other...Haruka would have become Captain if she had stayed."

Lord Mu never told Feiyan, but neither of them even made it into the maze...the King of Shobu hung their mutilated bodies on the city walls for ten days after they tried to assassinate him...and then fed the remains to wild dogs in front of his whole court...

Gen shuddered, feeling his stomach turn inside out and upside down.

"What?"

"Nothing...Did Lord Mu institute the rule before or after what happened to Xing and Haruka?" Gen asked, giving himself a mental shake.

"Before, but I think he ignored Xing and Haruka because they never allowed it to interfere with their work. If Father had ordered Haruka to put a knife through Xing's heart, she would have done it. She would have killed herself after, but she would still have done it and Xing wouldn't have blamed her for it. Like Father and Moon...That's the kind of relationship they had."

"Huh...so they were that loyal to each other..."

"Good grief Gen, I didn't think you were a romantic," muttered Feiyan, rolling her eyes.

He grinned, green eyes flashing as he looked at her.

"Well now you know my secret..."

She chuckled, but then her mood turned, seeing the answering change in Gen's expression.

"Let's go in," she said quietly.

"What about Hajoon?" he asked, taking her hand again.

She jerked her head to a corner and before Gen could say anything else, Hajoon had separated his tall form from the shadows, a frown marring his handsome face.

"You're hopelessly unaware for a Shadow famed for stealth," Hajoon said to Gen, folding his arms.

Gen laughed at the jab.

"That's not it. I knew it the second you stepped onto the balcony. I was just confirming if Feiyan still wanted you to come with us," Gen said, something like jealously twisting in his bright green eyes.

Hajoon's expression didn't change, but his purple eyes seemed to darken.

"Stop bickering like a married couple," snapped Feiyan, as she stomped away. "It's not getting any earlier..."

Hajoon looked startled, and Gen made a "pffft" sound. Then they both grinned at each other and followed after the person they cared about most.

***

Lying in their arms sometime later, their limbs still entangled, Feiyan tried to memorize the sweet saltiness of their skin, the thick masculine scent of their sweat, and the feel of their damp hair dragging across her as they had undulated together in that hot, desperate mess that had been their earlier lovemaking.

"Fei," whispered Gen, brushing her forehead with his lips. He propped himself on an elbow, but she gripped him tightly as he tried to sit up.

"Not yet...please..." she begged softly.

"Who can resist that request?" murmured Hajoon from the other side. He cuddled closer to her, moulding his thighs to her bottom and pressing the firm muscles of his chest into her shoulder blades. His hand slid across her skin as he caught Gen's arm. "Stay..."

Gen sighed and lay back down on his side, eyes flicking away, but then he groaned in embarrassment, reddening.

"Oh..." Feiyan laughed when she was poked in the stomach by something hard. "Is that why you were trying to escape?"

Her smile was teasing as she put her hands on either side of Gen's face and pulled him closer so that she could kiss him.

He's always been this cute.

She could also feel Hajoon grinning against her ear.

"Shall we punish him, Fei?" he asked, reaching over and placing a hand between her body and Gen's.

"Hey—!" Gen protested, but his green eyes fluttered closed as Hajoon's warm fingers closed over him. "Hey w-wait!"

Hajoon's hair fell over her neck as he leaned over, hand moving skillfully. She felt his breath warm on her face as she lay between them.

Feiyan's eyes became half-lidded as she watched Gen's expression change, and as she felt her own desire curl up in her belly. She tugged Gen's face close again and pushed her tongue along his lower lip, biting him lightly.

He could only make an embarrassed grunt as Hajoon continued to coax him.

"You're so weak to this..." she whispered, trying not to giggle.

"Stop ganging up on me!" Gen retorted, but then he groaned when she reached down around Hajoon's hand and firmly cupped his balls.

"Fei!"

"Shall we stop teasing him then?" asked Hajoon silkily, removing his hand. He leaned back with a smirk.

"Yes, I've got a better idea..." she murmured. Pushing at Gen's chest to give herself more space, she then turned her body and opened her lips to take Gen's cock into her mouth.

Gen gasped and moaned out her name. Despite holding himself back, he was becoming more excited as she pleasured him with her tongue while he unconsciously thrust his hips forward into her mouth.

On the other side, tempted by the lower half of her body, Hajoon hooked one of Feiyan's legs over his shoulder, and dipped his tongue into the folds of her sex, licking and sucking at her sweet spots. Soon, she was trying not to buck her own hips as he teased her with growing insistence. Feeling like she was neglecting Hajoon a bit, Feiyan reached back behind her and stroked his length even while Gen's breathing grew more ragged with her attention.

"Fei...Fei, stop...let go...!" Gen cried out urgently.

She ignored him, swallowing him deeper into her mouth until he hit the back of her throat. His fingers spasmed in her hair while wave upon wave of pleasure crashed down on him and he stiffened with a hoarse cry as his entire body clenched with his orgasm. Only when she felt him release did she let him go, coughing lightly.

"Fei..." Gen breathed, gently wiping her mouth with a thumb and pulling her up to lean against his chest. "Are you alright?"

"Yes..." she nodded as Gen held her up, cuddling her.

"Good," said Hajoon with a smouldering smile. "Now it's your turn..."

Before she could protest, Gen cupped her breasts from behind, stroking at her nipples until they were hard, while Hajoon spread her legs open and nudged his length against her wet entrance. Head tilted to the side, Hajoon watched her face while he teased her with his tip, sliding against her in slow slick motions.

"Hajoon...please..." she whispered, fisting her hands in the sheets as he leisurely tortured her, his eyes wicked.

"Please what...?" Hajoon grinned, purple eyes glinting in the candlelight.

Gen also chuckled, the sound muffled against her neck, as he bit her where it joined her shoulder.

It's wrong. It's wrong to not be able to tell them how much I care about them, she thought as their chuckles filled her with a deep sadness. She closed her eyes to prevent tears from trickling down her face. I'm sorry for pushing you both away.

When she opened them again, she could feel both their gazes on her. There was no blame. No bitterness. Their eyes were filled with nothing but tenderness for her, and she realized that they understood and had forgiven her a long time ago.

"Don't let your mind wander," chided Hajoon gently, leaning forward to kiss her. "Just focus on us. On this..." he said, suddenly plunging his full length into her, causing her to arch her body up with a cry.

Increasing the torrent of sensations roaring up her body, Gen pressed his fingers around where Hajoon had entered, rubbing at her folds and the sensitive nub of flesh hidden there.

Feiyan opened her mouth to scream, but Gen kissed her, swallowing the sound as Hajoon slammed his hips into her again and again, burying himself so deep inside that her vision blurred with each thrust.

She could hear herself crying, but she couldn't tell whether she was sobbing with pleasure or if she was sobbing because her heart was breaking, and they didn't let her try to think about it either as both of them drove her higher and higher until her mind went blank, and she shattered into pieces between them.

The last thing she remembered before she fell asleep was their quiet murmuring and their gentle hands as they cleaned her up and tucked her into bed between them, leaving with her the impression of their warmth.