My hands are tied.

Figuratively, not literally.

With some of my most trustworthy capos out of commission, we have fallen behind all of our orders. Everything is so wishy-washy. My lieutenants have to carry the extra responsibility to make every delivery, cook and sell. Besides myself, Mateo offered to oversee Gato's branch and to feel around for any waves.

Taking out a monumental familia member like Gato is asking for a rebellion. People are going to think if I can take out a capo--what would stop me from taking them out? Even though I had many problems with the bastard, he has followers. People willing to leave the familia name behind for him.

According to Mateo's reports, Gato's closest friends are slacking off and refusing to work. For being over forty years old, they act more immature than I do. It's fucking embarrassing, and once we're on track with our orders, I won't hesitate to get rid of them, too. They're useless and only cause headaches at this point.

Tonight, two separate shipping are taking place-- one to Diablo's Paraiso and the other to my station in Colombia. I don't have enough to fulfill the entire order, but I'm giving what I can to keep the tides calm. Mika wouldn't care, but I don't want her to think I'm using our relationship as an advantage. Business and pleasure are a tricky slope to tip-toe on.

I sign my signature for a few more paperwork before taking off my glasses and rubbing my eyes. They're stressed, blurry, and a knot forms in my brain. I'm starting to understand why presidents leave the office with gray hair and look as if they aged fifty years. My eyebrows knit together when I hear the door creak open.

Who the hell came into my office without knocking on the door?

My eyes flutter to the entrance, fucking mind-blown at the sight of my stunning girlfriend in a platinum blonde bob. The tips of her hair reach an inch below her heart-shaped jawline and curtain bangs obscure her forehead. On her shoulders is the fluffy white fur coat I brought for her, swallowing them up. The white satin dress has a slit on her left thigh, leaving little to the imagination.

My heart burns with jealousy as my mind goes haywire, thinking about all the men looking at my everything. Especially Luka. First, he took my brother's attention, and now he wants Mika. It's like I've been subconsciously in this game with him. He's using people that matter to me like pawns. Unlike my brother, Mika won't betray me.

It's Mika and I forever.

My heart flips with joy when the backpack slips from her shoulder and her radiating, adorable smile peeks through. Her heels clink against the black marble floors as I hoist myself from the chair, meeting her halfway for a hug. She jumps, wrapping her arms around my neck and kicking her legs up as I spin us around. Her sweet strawberry scent engulfs my nose like the way she's stolen my heart.

"What did I do to deserve a heartwarming hug like this?" I ask, unable to fight the smile forming on my lips.

Mika tightens her arms around my neck. "Just you, being you. I missed you. Like a lot. It's a little embarrassing to admit."

I quickly sneak a kiss on the side of her head. "Is that why you're refusing to let go? So, I don't see how red your face is?"

"Shut up!" Mika playfully retorts, lowering her feet to stand on them, but keeping her hands on my neck. "My face only turns red when I'm wasted. Like really fucking wasted. You should know."

I wiggle my eyebrows. "I do. You were really cute." My hand cradles her chin. "Cuter than usual."

She rolls her eyes. "Stop calling me cute. It ruins my image. I prefer being seen as sexy." Her tongue snakes across her teeth as she tugs on the spaghetti straps on her shoulders down, revealing her bare body little by little.

Taking a deep breath, I watch her tits spill from the strained fabric, elegantly beautiful. The silk dress pools at her legs, leaving Mika in only her lace black thong and fishnets. Never dropping her sultry gaze, she pushes my paperwork off the desk and presses her stomach against it.

"What do you think, Muñeco?" Mika asks, cocking her head. "The only thing left is my fishnets and thong. Rip them. Then there's nothing in the way. Except for your pants, of course." She spins around, hooking her finger on the belt. "But that can be rearranged."

I harshly bite my bottom lip. "You're still cute."

Her eyes narrow. "I'm not trying to be cute. Seriously, I stopped being cute ages ago."

"Who told you that?"

Her heels clink-clank as she rushes over to the backpack and pulls out the hoodie I gave her on the fourth of July. She throws the hoodie over her head and forces her arms out. Mika is honestly all three-- sexy, hot, and cute. She's a rare diamond in this world, full of coal. My gray hoodie ends at her knees, swallowing her up. Can I just bang my head against the wall? My heart is overloading with all her cuteness.

Mika holds onto the shelf as she takes off her heels. "Men. I stopped being 'cute' in their eyes when I turned thirteen, and my body started developing. Apparently, I can still be a kid, but if I have boobs and an ass, suddenly, I'm hot. It's fucking disgusting."

My heart grips with guilt. "What happened? Y-you know... after your parents died? Where did you go?"

Her happiness crumbles as the green specks in her eyes lose their shine. "Ummm. My father owed this cartel over five million dollars. They came that night to collect the money, or kill him, but I did the job for them. They couldn't risk me talking to the public, so they took me as payment."

I feel horrible complaining about minor circumstances in my life when Mika hadn't gotten a break. It's like every year got worst before they got better. At least, I hope I make Mika's life happier. I don't want to be a burden. I want to be the reason she changes her narrative on this world. 

She plays with the ends of her blonde hair. "I gave eight years of my life to them. Not by choice, but it's not like I had the power to do anything. Either I do what they say or die. Maybe it makes me selfish, but I wanted to live. So, I sold drugs and threatened people with their debts."

"Those fuckers," I mutter softly. "I wish we met earlier. Maybe I could've done something. Protect you. But I promise you will never go through that shit again. After getting rid of Luka, we will focus on eliminating those motherfuckers who stole your childhood. I'll flip the world upside down until I find every single one of them."

The side of Mika's lips tip to a half-smirk. "Thank you."

My eyebrows scrunch up. "For what?"

Mika breathes out, gripping onto her wrist, and shrugs. "For caring. T-this type of relationship is all new to me. I don't fully grasp the concept of love and trust in a committed relationship. It might be a side-effect because of everything I've gone through, but I'm trying. I don't want to be like the rest of the world. I want us to persevere and walk into the light together." 

My heart overdoses with love.

Strolling to Mika with leisurely steps, the bridge of her nose turns bright pink like Rudolph, and I take her face in the palm of my hands. "You don't understand how fucking happy this makes me. I understand it is hard, Mika, but don't make assumptions about me because of the men in your past. I'm the one man that's going to be by your side and treat you right."

For a second, a glossy tint shines in her eyes, but she blinks it away, diverting her gaze to the side. "It's going to rip me to shreds when you hate me."

An unstrain chuckle leaves my lips. "That's where you are wrong, Princesa. There's nothing in the world that can make me hate you."

Mika's gaze drops to the floor. "Sometimes the sanctuary of words isn't enough to combat the nature of things."

"Why do you speak so eerily vague?"

Her lips stretch into a bright smile, but her eyes couldn't help to scream the truth. Pain, torment, agony. Tears sprinkle down her cheeks, and she tries to pull away, but I don't let her. I want her to be vulnerable. My heart ruptures to watch her chest heaving, shaking with soft sniffles. Mika is trying to hold them back, but the dam has collapsed, leaving her drenched.

"A-all my life I've followed with this dark, terrorizing shadow." She pauses, trying to gather her breaths. "It's like I'm cursed. I always lose the people I care about, and I don't want you to follow that pattern. I don't want to lose you. I can't lose you." 

"Princesa," I whisper, stroking soothe circles on the apple of her cheeks. "I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere. The Devil himself is going to have to come out from hiding if they want to divide us."

"You don't understand." She sighs, a tear trailing down her button nose.

"Help me understand, Mika," I reply, trying to refrain from showing any cracks in my voice. Her sniffles are attacking my most sensitive place, and I want to cry with her. For her. She deserves the whole fucking world, yet it seems adamant to tear her down. My heart bleeds for her, smearing my shirt with warm, red blood.

"There's been two other people in my life that I've cared about." She licks her lips, causing them to glisten in the light. "Being a drug mule is surprisingly competitive. If you exposed yourself to the wrong person--they will turn you in if it means their sentence was reduced. Survival of the fittest. It wasn't until I meant the new girl on the block, Riley, that I started seeing the world on a different axis."

She offers me a crooked smile. "Riley was a year younger than me at the time-- thirteen. Riley's parents gave her up as collateral until they were able to pay the cartel back for months of stolen heroin. She was so naive. To think her parents were actually going to come back for her when, in reality, they were high in a ditch somewhere. She was so annoying. Always cheery and happy with all the shit going around us."

I mutter, "D-did she ever reunite with them?"

Her smile disappears into dust. "I think I was so miserable that I wanted everyone to be miserable with me. So, I tracked down her parents and showed her the truth. God, I'm such a bitch. She lost a little of her child-like demeanor after that day. But for some reason, she really liked me and idolized me."

Remorse spreads through her features, causing them to tense up. "She was like a sister I never wanted, but needed. At this point, it's been four long, excruciating years working for them. I couldn't take it anymore. I wanted a way out, and I was determined to find it."

She groans, squeezing her eyes shut. "I was so fucking stupid. Why did I think I could take a whole fucking cartel at fourteen? No amount of help would be able to take them out. I dragged Riley into it when we accidentally murdered one of the capos. We had no choice but to go on with the plan or be killed."

Mika's frame quivers, and I try to ease her, soothe her by tracing my knuckle on the outline of her cheek. "I-I told Eugen-. Diablo, my plan to leave and take Riley with me. He went ballistic. He wanted to be my knight in white satin armor, but he failed to realize I wasn't a princess in damsel. I waited four years for him to do something, and that was more than enough."

I try to keep my touch light, feather-like, but the involvement of Diablo ignited the brewing fire within.

Her dark eyes swarm with sorrow and guilt. "He told them. That motherfucker sold Riley out and got me, too. They... Um- R-raped us. Gang raped us. A power play in their books. It went on for hours. The worst part of it all is I didn't care. I didn't care that those men took my virginity. I cared that they violated Riley and tortured her for what I had done. She dreamed about being a princess in a big shiny castle and finding her prince."

She turns to the side, her lip twitching, hiding her face behind the blonde wig. Silent whimpers leave her lips, causing her to pull away and hide.

Using my finger, I tilt her jaw towards me to meet her broken, raw eyes, tearing me into pieces. She breaks eye contact after a second and tries to conceal.

"Mika, please don't pull away from me. Let me be here for you. You don't have to feel embarrassed. I love you."

Mika shoves into my chest, causing a whirl of air to escape my lips as she cries into my chest. Gripping the back of my shirt, tremors roll through her body as I sniffle, tenderly rubbing her back. Those pieces of shit better watch out because their days are numbered.

"During everything, I zoned out, focusing all my attention on the wall, and I didn't hear her piercing screams. They slit her from her chest to her belly like an animal. I-I senten-ced her to death. T-that's a-ll I'm ever good for. Getting the people I care about killed."

My heart swells with anguish. "I wish I could say something that would make this all go away, but my words would be meaningless. But I ensure you, Mika, I won't rest until we make them pay for taking Riley's life." I press a quick kiss on her head. "It won't make everything better, but it will bring her justice."

Mika nods, removing her hands from around my waist and uses the back of her hand to dry her tears. "I didn't mean to cry. I guess the events still weigh heavily on my conscious."

"Don't you ever feel the need to hide from me," I assure her, fixing her blonde bangs on her forehead. "I won't ever judge you. It's not healthy for you to keep everything bottled inside. Let me be your safe place."

She sniffles, her nose crinkling. "You are."

"I have one question." My throat clogs up as I debate over asking her. She already shared more than ever before. I don't want her to close right back up. "Why do you still work for Diablo if he helped the cartel?"

A menacing laugh falls from her lips. "It's complicated. Our relationship isn't exactly what people consider healthy. I've tried to separate myself from him, but he's always around. I can't seem to get rid of him. It's been like that since I was ten years old."

Unsettling knots entwine in my stomach. "Has it ever been romantic? I mean, Diablo is older than you, isn't he? You talk about Riley and me being naive, but maybe you're too. It explains why he always wants you with him because that's how groomers are."

Another morbid laugh leaves her lips as she shakes her head. "That's ridiculous. Eugene couldn't groom a fucking dog."

I bite my lip. "How old was he when you met him?"

"Twenty," Mika answers the question casually, as if it's something ordinary in the world. She was ten. What does a twenty-year-old have in common with a ten-year-old? Zip. Nothing. Adults don't show any interest in children unless they have an agenda. Whether she knows it or not, she has been groomed one way or another.

I want to protest, to show her the truth, but groom victims struggle with seeing their groomers for what they really are. All I know is I have to limit her contact with Diablo. He's a fucking piece of shit with his claws into her.

Mika uses the sleeve of her hoodie to wipe the mascara mix with tears on her cheeks. "I don't get what's so bizarre about it. It's not like he fucked me when I was underage. He never tried to. I had to be the one to initiate things. He only kissed me once when I was sixteen and we're both wasted. Sounds pretty normal to me. Except for when we tried killing each other."

I scoff, scratching the nape of my neck. "You really don't see it, do you?"

A frown mars her eyebrows. "See wh-?"

"Jefe!" My attention snaps to the creaking door as Mateo strides in with no care for my privacy. Mika turns away from the door, dabbing the tissue on her face. His eyes widen when they land on Mika and he clears his throat. "Sorry, Jefe. I wasn't aware there was company. We need to discuss about the other familia."

"Go ahead," I respond. Mateo's lips pull into a straight line as he harshly glares at Mika. Confusion dwindles in my face until I realize what has his panties in a bunch. "Oh, it's Mika. You're free to say anything in front of both of us. I trust Mika with everything."

Mateo's muscles relax. "Okay. Um- there's been word that Luka is going to attack us again. Soon."

Mika spins on her heel, ripping the blonde wig off her head and untangling the bun on her head. "I know where he's hitting us next. Stadium B."

Mateo's eyebrows pull together as he huffs, "How does he even know about that? It's confidential. Only a small crew of Mortereros knows where it's located."

"I told him," Mika blurt, causing my nerves to spike.

"What the fuck?" Mateo spats, dragging his palm down his clenched face. "Why in hell made you think that was a good idea? We aren't ever going to be able to go back there. Esta de su lado? Jefe, esta jugando con los dos."

(Are you on his side? Boss, she's playing with both of you."

My eyes narrow at my cousin as I respond in a low, aggressive growl. "Excuse me? Watch your tone. This is my woman you're talking to. You treat her with the respect she deserves. I trust Mika, and I'm sure she had a reason. Stay in your fucking place and leave the questions to me." My scorching gaze diminishes as I stare at Mika. "Why did you tell him?"

Mika crosses his arms over her chest. "Because it gives us leverage. If we know he's coming, we will win. Plus, it gives you the opportunity to snoop around his house and find something we can use against him. Unless you want to kill him."

Kill him? If anything, I rather find something that keeps him operating for me. His submission. Control every aspect of our contract and take over the drug world, wiping every other familia out.

I shake my head. "No. Unless it's our last resort."

Mateo groans. "I think we should just kill him. He's worth more for us if he's dead."

I ignore his comment. "How do we go about this? I don't want to send people only for them to get killed. It's stupid."

"You have to!" Mika demands, raising her voice to show authority. "Luka will know something is up if no one is there. It will compromise me. He will realize I'm playing him like a fiddle, and I don't think that's smart."

Mateo scoffs, his nose flaring. "Why? Because you don't want to die? Your life isn't the only important one here."

She rolls her eyes. "Yeah, I know."

A frustrated groan leaves my lips. "Mika, what am I going to do? I don't want to subject the familia to a purposeless battle. I don't want any of them to risk their lives."

Mika's small hand grips mine, swaying it back and forth. "Asiel, this is war. Blood is going to be shed, whether you like it or not. We have to chance to choose our battle and the people. You can send the lower ranks that aren't fully committed. They're worthless if they aren't dedicated to you."

Mateo scratches the top of his brow. "After hearing everything out, I agree with Mika. Send Gato's friends, and we can round up another hundred soldiers to fight Luka. I'll watch over them. Distract him long enough to give you time to find something. Anything."

Mika's expression remains passive. "I'll go with Mateo, too."

My brows jump to my hairline as I squeeze her hand. "What? No. You're not getting anywhere near this mess."

"Asiel," her voice softens, peering up at me. "You don't have to worry about me. I can watch over myself. I'm more worried about you making it through the night. Luka expects you there, and if I'm there, it might give the illusion that you are, too. See, he thinks we're attached to each other."

"He's not wrong," Mateo mutters in his fake cough.

Why do I bother telling Mika no? In all honesty, she doesn't need protection, but it's only human to want to keep the girl I love safe. She's absolutely right, but I fear I might not focus without her by my side. My thoughts are going to be preoccupied with praying she's safe to worry about anything else.

It's going to be fucking impossible, but we're an unstoppable force for a reason.

I sigh, nibbling on my lip. "Okay. Let's do this."

Our baby Asiel!! I felt like we haven't been in his head forever even though we probably haven't been a way for that long...

Do you guys have a favorite POV? Mika or Asiel? Or you can cheat and say both lol!

What do you guys think learning a bit more insights of Diablo's and Mika's relationship? Looks different from outside perspective... or is Asiel reading into it wrong?

Also, I love when Asiel assumes Mika that it's okay to break down in front him like... get a man like that!!!!

Thank you for reading this chapter and I can't wait to read all your comments!

Also if any of you guys make video edits, aesthetic boards, drawings, playlist about Mika, I would love to see them! Tag me!I make some myself but I like to see my readers perspectives of the characters I written.

Don't feel abrogated lol! I'm just kinda of bored and would love to see what people can come up with.

Love ya!❤️💜❤️