"...I have eaten....Now don't ask me again!", I replied rolling my eyes at her texts.
I wonder how she never gets tired of asking if I am eating properly or not.

"Haha! Someone's getting fed up of my texts.", Came the instant reply.

"No! You just bother yourself alot! You need to eat more...And spend your time caring for yourself.", I texted back.

I was currently in my office, doing some pending work. However, her text amidst the work, delighted my mood.

My phone buzzed again, "You never fail to make me lose words."

"Good!", I smiled triumphantly, "Nonetheless, what's the little one doing!?"

"Pouting angrily because her dadda left for the office alone.", Came the reply..

I smiled amusedly. How can I forget the tantrum Mahira threw when she saw me in my tuxedo today.
She realized I am going to the office, and so she readily went under the dining table and brought her slippers.
Wearing them, she stretched her hands to me signalling to be picked up.
I picked her up but I and Bela both were confused at her actions unless she said the next words, "Leggo dadda!"
{Let's go dadda.}

God knows how many promises I made so she could stay back. But of course, she was still angry and refused to kiss me goodbye.

I replied to her text, "She must be looking adorable then...Send me her picture.."

And few minutes later, I see some snaps of her.

I know I was questioning these chats earlier, and I have made arrangements for dad to come and talk to her.
Hopefully she doesn't know the secret, I have successfully hid her for six long weeks.

"She's love! I love her...", I replied with the kissing emoji.

"I love it you love her!", My brows furrowed. Her sentence held a deeper meaning to it.

****

"Dad you're trying to insult me!", Bela groaned as dad proceeded to tell her childhood antics.
Just because Mahira resembles her alot.

I sat at one end smiling, hoping that one day, I will be in dad's place and Mahira at Bela's.
When I'll be narrating the stories of my little brat, who was currently tickling my chin, with her little toe, sitting on my lap.

Just then Vyom's phone rang and he excused from us telling it's an important call.

Dad signalled me, and taking Mahira I went in my room.

Now it was just Bela and Dad sitting in the drawing room.
My room was downstairs, meaning opposite the dining room and when silent, the talks there were well audible.

I stood in the doorway, hiding myself when they began their conversation.

"Bela how are you feeling now!?", Dad asked.

"Quite better dad! I no more feel weak and fatigued.", She replied and I undoubtedly hear the smile in her voice.

Few moments later, dad said, "You look happier now...You know...Nothing I saw in past two years. I missed my child like this!"

"Yes dad even I haven't felt this feeling from a long time. May be the illness is getting over."

Silence followed and then dad spoke up, "How are things with Mahir!?......As I see he's staying here."

"Dad...Quite better than they have been since long time. He's glad I am good and so is me. We have moved past what happened.", A smile adorned my face knowing she feels the same as me. And no more holds any anger for me.

I heard dad walking to her, "It must be difficult to hide from Mahir about your treatment.", he said in not so high a voice.

"Dad six transfusions are over and I managed to keep it from Mahir. I know he'll feel bad whenever he comes to know that I hid it from him. It's just that I didn't want him to feel guilty or responsible for something he hasn't done. And knowing Mahir, since it came to my life, he will do anything...."

"You realize how much that man loves you!? Do you!?", Dad asked.

"Yes dad. I won't doubt on that. I never did.", My heart swelled but I was also confused on why dad is talking about me and not her donor.

"What about your donor!? You said he contacted you weeks ago.", Dad asked this time a bit stiff voice.

Silence followed and few seconds later Bela spoke.
"How to tell you dad....!?", Her voice was almost close to a whisper.

"What it is Bela!?", Dad's question made me certain Bela knows!!! She knows I am the donor.

What else it is that makes her wordless about her donor.

My heart thumped loudly in my ribs and I felt a sudden run of anxiety.
As if something is going to hurt me.

"Tell me child!?", Dad nudged her again.

"Dad...I feel really good after talking to him. He seems a genuine person. I mean he tries alot to make me happy. He would just write some sentence in his texts and they would comfort me. He cares for me. He's a bit playful, but he's true. He doesn't judge my life. He loves Mahira alot! He would request for her photos and videos. He adores her. He notices even the tiniest thing about me and would guess my mood by my usage of punctuation. I was troubled that day and losing my mind, I called him. He didn't say anything but didn't ignore my plead for comfort. I feel like something new is making a place in me. He lives my story like it is his. Dad I feel rejuvenated. Reborn. Re-energised."

"Bela...!", Dad's voice trialled off.

"I know what it is dad. I have experienced it once....", I gulped in. Something unsettled in me.

Her next words were the most unexpected thing, and I almost lost my breath.
"I am in love dad! I am in love again. With the man whose blood is now running in my body."

She paused for a while but then continued, "He made me feel it again dad. I can feel him in me. May be that's because of his blood and I feel like I have never been this close to someone before as I am to him. I want to move on dad, with my donor. I know I should think about Mahir also but I want to be selfish! I want to be with the man who I love unconditionally now."

I gripped the door tight. I felt like I would break here.

It was me who said she could move on. And this time it was not jealousy but something more disastrous.

She doesn't know that man is me.

Still she fell in love with him. A realization as bitter as poison. For her, it is someone else than me.

I lost the track of my doings and slammed the door of my room shut, startling Mahira in the process.
I couldn't hear my love slipping from my hands like that. But it already did...

I slid against the door and landed on the ground.

No matter how strong and sacrificing I wanted to pretend, I am vulnerable when it comes to her.
I shoved my hand in my hair in frustration.
And closed my eyes shut.

I am sorry Bela! You're loving an illusion. An illusion that will break the moment your treatment ends. The man who broke you is the same who is healing you.
Sorry! I will disappoint you again!
You'll be hurt when you'll try to touch the illusion you're loving. As hands will find nothing but air.
Why did I push her hopes so high only to bring them crashing down on earth at the end.
Because she will hate her Mr. Donor the instant she will see my face attached to me.
The face she tried to move on from, will be back to dread your life.

My thoughts broke when I felt a little legs trying to strangle me.

I snapped open my eyes only to find my little one trying to sit on me, by strangling her legs on both my sides.
I eyed her curiously as she made herself comfortable in my lap.
She faced me, and frowned at something.

Before I could realize or read her mind, she brought her hand forward, and wiped my cheek of the tear I never realized I shed.

I gasped at her action.

She brought another hand to my another cheek, repeating the same action.

She then held my T-shirt my her fists and pulled herself up kissing the tip of my nose.

"No dadda! Goo baby don clyy!", Shocked and surprised. That would describe my reaction. She repeated the same sentence Bela says to her when she cries.
{No dadda! Good babies don't cry!}

"You're my princess! Do you know that!?", I asked and she grinned.
Although, she didn't know what 'princess' means, my tone was enough to tell her I was appreciating.

Gathering myself up, and picking her along with me, I stood up with her in my arm. And I would admit the heartbreak I felt just seconds before vanished in thin air.

No matter how much heartache I get from Bela, she herself gave me a healer to everything. The one in my arms.

I went near my couch and played a subtle music on my tablet, keeping it beside us.
But the brat in my hand had other plans. As soon as she got the tablet in the reach of her hand, she started touching everywhere on the screen.

I playfully glared at her only to earn a grin back.
I was familiar to it.
Like her mother she would never allow me to hear my favourite songs. Instead unlike her mother, she liked extra loud music so she could jump on it.
Something she learnt on her trip with Vyom and everyone.

As expected, shrill music of despacito started and her eyes shined.

As gently she climbed on my lap, she slipped ten times rapidly. As soon as her feet touch the floor, she started shaking her waist and twirled her hands in the air!

God! My heart swelled with joy.
My heart danced the same way, my beautiful daughter was dancing before me.
She looks so cute!

I pulled out my phone in order to store this moment forever in my memory.

****

I didn't do it intentionally but something in me, made me avoid Bela.

Was I disappointed in her!?
Was I feeling vulnerable that I can't pull her back to me!?

Because her feelings for her Mr. Donor were as real as they were once for me. I can interpret her words.

Have I really been replaced by the illusion I myself created!?

I shifted in my bed, unable to sleep.
Mahira was with Bela tonight.
And I was now feeling quite lonely.

After trying several failed attempts, I gave up on sleep and picked up myself intending to go the balcony upstairs.

I pulled out a juice can from the refrigerator on my way and went upstairs.
Just when I was passing Bela's bedroom, I heard some shuffling.

I was alert at once.

It's not possible Bela would be awake at this hour of the night. It's past midnight.

I slowly opened the door that wasn't locked as usual.

My eyes fell on Mahira, who was sleeping peacefully on her crib by the side of the bed and then to the empty bed.

Huh!?
Where is she!?

I slowly walked in the room, only to find Bela standing before my mother's portrait.

This portrait was one she kept after she shifted her, because she believed my mother would shower her blessings on Mahira.

I discreetly entered the room when I heard her say, "I kept my promise Maa!"

"What promise!?", The words escaped my lips without thinking twice.

She jumped on hearing me and held her heart tight, "You scared me!!"

"What promise!?", I repeated. My words unintentionally held the hardness I never intended to expose to her.
I reminded myself, I can't be angry at her.

"You can't sleep!?", She clearly avoided my question. Is she hiding something!? Why is she avoiding my eyes!?

I decided to not push it further.
"Yeah...I can't."

"Why!? Had a bad day!?", She asked as if already knowing the answer.

I sighed nodding then leaning on the wall beside my mother's portrait.
One of the most beautiful women I have ever seen. The one who held my sanity. No doubt her death made me depressed. So depressed I crushed my own world..

"Want to talk about it!?", She said and that was what I expected.

"No!", It came out harsher than expected. And I instantly regretted my tone.

Before I could do any mistake, I decided I should leave her room.
I retreated and started to walk away, when she took hold of my hand.

"You're mad at me!?", I heard her.

I turned suddenly to face her.
"Why will I be mad at you...!?", She can't know I heard her conversation with dad.

She didn't answer back. Instead she looked deep in my eyes.
Even I couldn't divert my gaze. Her eyes are captivating.

"It hurts!?", I heard her and that finally made me pull my gaze away.

She knows!?

"What are you talking about!?", I tried to act oblivious.

She chuckled, "When because of the other person, things slip off your hands. Believe me Mahir! No one knows this better than me."

I turned to look at her.

She's right.

"I am getting punished finally. Am I!?", I uttered.

"I don't know.", She shrugged, "It's just that I have found love. For the second time in life. And believe me, I wanted to tell you this."

"Did you even meet him!? You sure he'll not hurt you!? You have any picture of him!?", I asked hoping to loosen her trust in that imaginary man.

"I meet him every second of my day. I am damn sure he won't hurt me. I don't have his picture. Yet he lives deep within my heart.", She smiled warmly.
Her words slashed my heart.

She used to say this for me.

"I am glad.", I forced out the words without looking in her eyes.
Of course I am not!

I pulled my hand out of her hold when I heard her say, "You can sleep here..."

Huh!?
What is she doing!?
Returning my favour!

"Bela...You should stop bothering yourself because of me. It is not right for us to share the same bed, especially when you're having another person in your heart.", I said to her giving a brief glance.

She sighed, "I am not going to lure you into making love to me. Even you can't deny we find comfort in each other. And that's not wrong in any way."

She tugged at my hand and pulled me with her towards her bed, "You don't need to do anything to lure me into making love to you! It's just I am afraid you may regret it later, which has never happened in our case."

"You think quite alot! Just go with the flow. Let life take you wherever it wishes. You'll soon find your shore!", There comes my writer!

"My shore belongs to someone else.", I said lying on the bed, as she settles beside me.

"Hold on to it. You never know. May be life yanks you back to your shore, in some other way!", She replied.

"You are not getting what I am implying!", I said facing her.

She chuckled, "Even you are not!"

****

Today, I was in my office with Vyom packing my stuff, so it could be sent to London and arranged in my office there.

"Believe me Mahir! No one is a bigger fool than you! I can't believe you're the same who pulled me out of the bed, to beat the boy who asked Bela out."

"That was clearly foolish of me!", I remarked while formatting my laptop.

"Seriously! That time you fought for her! Why not now!?", He whined.

"I was an excited teenager then."

"Mahir! You have lost it!"

"Vyom...That time it was them who approached Bela, and clearly she didn't want that. Now, it is her who wants someone else."

"And that someone else is you!", He pointed his finger at me.

"She doesn't know it.", I returned.

"So tell her man!"

"No way!", I turned to face him, "And you are not going to open your mouth!"

He scowled at me.

"Do hell with yourself!", He threw the book in his hand towards me.

I caught it before it could hit my head.
"What the hell Vyom!?"

"This is ridiculous. You are willingly giving her up! And you know what...I will curse myself forever for this. Even if not intentionally, I was the sole reason, you both separated your ways!", His tone held sadness and guilt forcing me to stand up.

"Vyom! Stop blaming yourself!", I held his shoulders, "If not you, there would have been someone else here. The basic problem was my lack of trust in her. I'll have to pay. If we are destined to be together, we'll come eventually. And if not, no matter how many times, we reunite, we'll divorce again!", I reasoned however I knew it's a vague hope I am giving him.