Hayley was curled on her side when he entered, her broken arm hidden beneath the thin sheet. The concealment mocked him, her bruises dark smudges visible through the cotton, the shape of the cast jutting out at harsh angles. She twitched in her sleep, her IV scrape, scrape, scraping against the fabric, a soft accusation of his failure to her. He lost her in pieces, watching her fade day after day. He allowed that impassable barrier sit between him, let her drown while he festered.

This was his penance.

Anthony knelt beside her and closed his eyes, concentrating on the feel of her shallow breaths brushing over his cheek. He reached for her, lacing their fingers together, something he hadn't done since the day he brought her home from the hospital. She whimpered in her sleep. He worried that his touch hurt until she curled tighter around their joined hands, her shallow breaths brushing ghostly light over his knuckles. Seeing her like this was too much. He felt the box inside him bursting at the seams.

"Don't leave me." His voice broke on a sob. Anthony's shoulders heaved so hard he struggled to keep upright as he clung to her. "Don't leave me, please. I'm sorry. This is my fault. This is my fault. I-I didn't know how to reach you. I left you to deal with this alone. I left you alone. I'm so sorry." He brushed her hair off her forehead with shaking fingers. "Please, please come back to me, baby."

He stayed there, shuddering and shaking, until his knees went numb. Hayley's eyes fluttered open, irises washed out by the overhead fluorescent before they focused on him. The corners of her mouth lifted in a tiny smile. It was the most beautiful thing he ever saw.

"Hi," she said. Her voice was faint like the scrape of tape over cloth but her fingers clutched him tight.

"Hi, sweet," he said, relieved laughter in his words. "I'm so sorry."

"I heard you," Hayley whispered. Her eyes filled, spilling tears across the bridge of her nose. "I heard you calling me back."

He nodded. "It's going to be you and me, the whole way back." He cupped her hand between his. "I won't hide from you anymore. I promise. I won't leave you alone again. I'll be there, all night, all day, and we'll heal, we'll come back from this." When her mouth trembled he leaned in, brushing his lips across hers. "And when you're healed, if you want to try again, I will be there with you every step of the way."

"Try again?" She hiccupped the words but there was a hopeful note, a spark darkening her eyes.

"We lost him," said Anthony. The words made her flinch, the wound still too raw. "But that is not the end for us. We can still be parents. We have this beautiful future still waiting for us. We just have to move forward, even if we start by crawling."

Hayley's eyes flickered, staring past him over his shoulder. For a moment, her expression went slack. Anthony's heart turned over in his chest at that expression. He resisted the urge to turn his head and look but he knew. He knew she saw him. He waited, that tightness strangling his neck in an invisible noose until she shook herself. She inhaled long and deep through her nose. It was an ancient sound, swollen with the weight of this moment between them. When she looked at him, her eyes were deep blue and sad.

"I want to start crawling with you," she said.

Relief flooded through his veins, hotter and richer than sunlight, but the chaplain's words echoed through his thoughts. "Is he gone?"

That stark vulnerability peered back at him. "You believe he's real?"

"You believe he is real, and that is what matters. I don't want him to hurt you anymore," said Anthony.