I'm back at it again with the fun facts!!!

(I'm just really bored you guys, but whatever, enjoy)

Fun Fact #1: You know how in book three I said I wasn't gonna leave any hints about the final pairing???

I lied :)

I actually DID leave some hints, some were on accident while others were on purpose cuz I figured you guys wouldn't be able to tell 😂 😂 😂

The hints:

- In the "Romance" chapter of my guidebook, I mentioned that I like dark romance. If you know what dark romance is then that should've been A BIG ASS HINT as to who the final dude would be.

I was super unsure about making that statement because a ton of you guys have already commented that Jessie would be so sweet and pure whereas Essan would've been super fucked up, but NOT MANY PEOPLE REALIZED IT SO I WAS SAFE! Loooool, honestly guys, I was certain that someone would've pieced it together and made a comment of it, but nope. You either didn't notice or kept it to yourselves (thank you btw)

There would've been nothing dark about Jessie, Jason is a good and a mostly mentally sane guy, so their relationship would've been cute and sweet, it wouldn't have fit the bill for a dark romance.

- THERE WAS ALSO ANOTHER HUGE HINT IN THAT SAME CHAPTER TOO!!!! At the very end, I told everyone that I would need to put a 'sexual themes' warning for the next few books (this book, then 6, and 7). One person from Quotev actually figured it out (and lemme tell you guys, I was sweating, I was like "oh no, oh no, oh no" but thankfully, not a lot of people read my guidebook so only a few people saw her comment. But anyways, she commented this:

"WHO DESTROYS THE BABEY'S INNOCENCE?!?! I'm ready to fight them!!!! 🔪🔪

Ok but fr tho, I feel like you chose Ethan because it'd make more sense for them to do the ✨forbidden tango✨ in the next book... Jason's JUST getting to CHB in the Lost Hero so that'd be waaaaay too soon for them to do the frick frack unless they're just... hooking up, which is REEEEAAALLY uncharacteristic for the both of them......

So yeah, my bet's on our boy Ethan!!!"

-CuteTrash (from Quotev)

CuteTrash I wanted to applaud you so bad, BUT YOU ALSO MADE ME HELLA NERVOUS WITH YOUR ANALYSIS AND I COULDN'T SAY ANYTHING THAT WOULD GIVE THE ANSWER AWAY SO YEAH

- This third hint was also from the guidebook (wow, I didn't realize it until now but I keep leaving hints in my fucking guidebook asdhfawjhf). This one was an accident... sorta.

Okay, so you know how in chapter "What the Fawk 🙃" from Book Four, I told you guys I finally picked the final dude for our darling Essie? I had two entirely different routes/plans for Jason and Ethan and that I told you that I picked the plan that would torture the couple the most right?

Well in my guidebook chapter "I need guidance... :(" I ACTUALLY POSTED PICS OF THE PLAN TITLES LOLOLOL. My Wattpad readers probably didn't see that because I only posted that chapter in Quotev since it was a Quotev issue I needed help with, so sorry guys :P

But anyways, I was super frustrated with something so I took a screenshot to show everyone the problem. Then I uploaded the pics in Pinterest and that was when I finally realized that I actually had the titles of my plans right there. Oops. But I was sleepy and way too lazy to re-upload another picture so I just went "oh well" and used those pics in my chapter before publishing it :)

But anyways, since I know not everyone reads my guidebook, I'll show everyone one of the pics I'm talking about:

Remember how I kept telling you guys that I picked the most painfullest plan? LOOK AT THE LEFT SIDE!

"Ethan Route (pain, suffering, & psychological mindfuckery)"

"Jason Route (healing, cuteness, & purity)"

😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 Yeah so that was another big ass hint on who the final guy was

I can't think of any more hints, so I think this was all???? There might be more that I just forgot about or had accidentally slipped, so yeah

Fun Fact #2: I remember everyone losing their shit when they found out that Essie's actually 5'7" (170 cm) and being like "THAT'S TOO TALL, I THOUGHT SHE WAS A 5'2" BABEY THIS ENTIRE TIME".

Well guess what guys? While she might be considered tall, she's actually on the short side if you compare her height to the other characters!

I was so bored a couple months ago that I made a list of the characters' heights so here it goes (some of them are canon, but some I had to make up)

These are from tallest to shortest and for my non-American readers, I included centimeters too 😌

1. Frank: 6'3" | 191 cm (tallest babey ever)

2. Ron: 6'3" | 190 cm (another tall baby)

3. Ethan: 6'2" | 189 cm (tall evil baby 🔪🔪🔪)

4. Luke: 6'1" | 187 cm (a tall dead bitch 😔)

5. Sirius: 6'1" | 187 cm (perfect for modeling 💅)

6. Jason: 6'1" | 185 cm

7. Percy: 6'0" | 184 cm

8. Alabaster: 6'0" | 184 cm

9. Reyna: 6'0" | 183 cm (A TALL QUEEN)

10. Bellatrix: 6'0" | 183 cm (coulda gotten a nice modelling career if she wasn't such a fucking psycho smh 😒)

11. Regulus: 5'11" | 181 cm (Sirius probs teased him about his height a lot, lol)

12. Étienne: 5'11" | 180 cm (were you expecting this???)

13. Lucius: 5'11" | 180 cm (I didn't want to make him six feet cuz he's so 🤮)

14. Ted: 5'10" | 179 cm

15. Andromeda: 5'10" | 179 cm

16. Thalia: 5'10" | 179 cm

17. Remus: 5'10" | 178 cm

18. Draco: 5'10" | 177 cm (his mom's a Black, so he has the tall genes too ig)

19.  Annabeth: 5'9" | 175 cm

20. Narcissa: 5'8" | 172 cm

21. Esmerelda: 5'7" | 170 cm (all the Blacks were tall so I had to make her tall too✨)

22. Leo: 5'6" | 168 cm

23. Piper: 5'5" | 166 cm

24. Harry: 5'5" | 166 cm (I GAVE HIM DANIEL RADCLIFFE'S HEIGHT BECAUSE HE'S SUCH A SHORT KING)

25. Tonks: 5'5" | 165 cm

26. Hermione: 5'4" | 162 cm

27. Nico: 5'3" | 161 cm (OKAY I KEPT SEEING THAT HIS HEIGHT IN HOO WAS 5'6" BUT LIKE.... I KEEP THINKING OF HIM AS A BABEY SO I DEDUCTED SOME INCHES. I GUESS THIS WAS HOW YOU GUYS FELT ABOUT ESSIE'S HEIGHT, WOW) (he can be 5'6" later)

28. Hazel: 5'2" | 157 cm (the height difference between her and Frank tho, awww)

29. Ginny: 5'0" | 153 cm

Fun Fact #3: I WILL BE MAKING A SEPARATE BOOK FOR ONESHOTS AND HEADCANONS, ALL FOR THE ESSIE SERIES!!!!!!

🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳

I also said that I would be making it after this series is over with, but I changed my mind. I'll be making it earlier, as in, sometime around this week maybe? I'll also be posting the 'Essan in couples therapy' oneshot there too!

(Also, uh, I may or may nor include smut 👀 depends on if you guys want it or not. And since I'll be doing some scenes in this series that isn't full on smut, maybe I can write the full smutty scene in the separate book! Idk, just an idea. I've never really written smut before but maybe I can try it out for this series)

I JUST NEED HELP PICKING A NAME FOR THE SEPARATE BOOK! I have these so far, but you're free to suggest your own!

- Oneshots for the Essie Series!

- Essie Galore!

- Church of Essie

- All Hail, Essie

- Our Lord and Savior, Essie

(they get more chaotic the further down you go, lol)

Fun Fact #4: As you all know, Essie started styling her hair in that cute vintage old-hollywood glam curls ever since Silena told her she reminded her of the ingénues of the 1940s. Here are the sort of hairstyles she's been using daily:

(btw, she uses the hair styling spell "Crinus muto" so she can easily style her hair whichever way she wants, meaning she's basically walking around looking like a movie star 💅💅💅)

(Thought that was Ariana Grande for a sec ^)

And lastly.....

Scaramouche! Scaramouche! Will you do the fandago??! THUNDERBOLT AND LIGHTNING, VERY VERY FRIGHTENING ME!

(if you don't get it, that gif is of Eleanor Parker from the movie Scaramouche)

Fun Fact #5: I've already talked about Essie's future job if I ever have her live long enough to reach adulthood, but I've finally narrowed it down!! It's either gonna be

- teacher (maybe a kindergarten or preschool one)

- child therapist (which is ironic since she needs a child therapist rn)

- child protective service investigator

- OR a housewife/stay-at-home mom. I've ranted about this before BUT THIS IS AN ACTUAL REAL JOB! Housewives do fucking everything and they don't even get paid, SO THIS IS VERY MUCH A RESPECTABLE AND REAL JOB. Also, Molly Weasley's a housewife, are you really gonna go up to the Molly Weasley and be like "get a real job, loser" cuz she'll kill you just like she killed Bellatrix Lestrange.

But anyways, I'm leaning more towards the last option because that just seems like something Essie would be very happy to do. Honestly guys, all she wants is to live old enough to get married and have children because she absolutely fucking ADORES CHILDREN. Have you seen her with Nico??!!! Being a mother makes her so happy, so yeah, I think this is something that suits her the most :D She'd probably want three kids. Or four... or five... or seven (Weasley fam 2.0 lol) :D

(I have no idea how many kids they would have if they were to live to adulthood, but it's funny to think about it cuz Ethan can barely handle Nico 😂)

"bUt AutHor HoW wILl ShE gEt MoNeY, SHe'Ll Be FinANciAlLY DePenDEnt On EtHaN"

Sweeties, if you have the power to control people's minds and create illusions, you don't need money. And if you're so worried, then remember that she's the BLACK HEIRESS and the Blacks were considered royalty for a damn reason 😌💅 In addition to that, there's also the drachmas she earned from working in the Underworld, she could just sell those to a museum or whatever

Ethan may be on the way to becoming the best lawyer ever (he's the son of Nemesis, I doubt he'll ever lose a case) and he may be gettin' that dough, but Essie's the sugar mama in the relationship 🤑

Fun Fact #6: This is kinda random, but you know how I'm planning to write an Avengers story with Essie in it? I just found out that Scarlett Johansson, the actress playing Natasha... IS ONLY 5'3"!!! MEANING ESSIE'S 5'7" TALL ASS LITERALLY TOWERS OVER THE BLACK WIDOW OMFG 😂 😂 😂

Fun Fact #7: Surprisingly, I've never done the Nine Alignments thing for my characters before so I'm gonna do them now!

Essie: Chaotic Good (is that any surprise)

According to the Anarcho-Greek Review, the chaotic good is,

"A person who is Chaotic Good is a free-thinking kind spirit who may fight against Evil or simply embrace doing Good. They are, however, as likely as opposed to Law as they are to Evil, and tend to think poorly of police, politicians, and the like. They are opponents of hierarchy in all its forms, and they tend to have a particular love for freedom for themselves and for everyone else.

A Chaotic Good person faces a few contradictions for being committed to two distinct ideals. Honesty, for example, is generally considered Good, as it allows others to act with the best available information. But deception is often necessary. Some Chaotic Good people will only lie to those in positions of authority."

Ethan: Chaotic Neutral

"Contrary to what most people think, a Chaotic Neutral character is not necessarily selfish. They are simply more concerned with their own freedom—and potentially the freedom of those whom they love—than they are in abstract concepts like Good and Evil.

Some Chaotic Neural characters are in fact committed to Neutrality, believing that it is important to keep all options open for how they might treat people. Some believe that the freedom to act pro-socially or antisocially depending on the situation is just as important as freedom from law."

Alabaster: Chaotic Good

Sirius: Chaotic Good

Étienne: Chaotic Evil

"Chaotic Evil is known, at its extremes, as the alignment of serial killers and raving lunatics of destruction. And, to be sure, it is that. But for every mad bomber destroying people's lives because it's fun and they want to, there are plenty more people who just want to do whatever they want most of the time and sometimes that includes being downright Evil. Chaotic Evil is also the alignment of petty crooks who are pleasant to their friends but shoot people who don't deserve it.

And finally, Chaotic Evil is the alignment of those who are so committed to the destruction of a Lawful system that they will kill innocents to achieve it."

Regulus: Chaotic Neutral

Nico: Chaotic Good

Lou Ellen: True Neutral

"Most people honestly don't care much about this kind of stuff. They obey laws because it's not worth breaking them. They generally dislike Evil but don't mind if their side resorts to it when it comes down to winning or losing a war. They are True Neutral."

Harry: Neutral Good

"Most Good people are, most likely, Neutral Good at heart. They'll use the law to enact as much Good as they can and work outside it or without it when necessary. For some Neutral Good people, in fact, an allegiance to either Chaos or Law is a detriment to the greater goal of promoting Good. Others are less consciously promoting Good but just can't bring themselves to act Evil."

Percy: Chaotic Good

Annabeth: Chaotic Good

Hermione: Lawful Good

"Accidentally presented far too often as the most stodgy or boring alignment, Lawful Good is actually rife with moral complexity. A Lawful Good person in an Evil system is likely to be as much a revolutionist as any Chaotic Good person. It's just that she seeks to replace the Evil system with a Lawful Good system—at which point, her allegiances with any Chaotic Good compatriots are likely to become very strained indeed.

A Lawful Good person in a Neutral or Good society, however, is most likely to be concerned with enforcing the law of the land in a way that will often compete with her desire to do Good. A Lawful Good character, for example, will have no compunction locking up a starving thief caught stealing bread."

Ron: Neutral Good

Fun Fact #8: I never did the personality type test either!!!

Essie: ESFJ | The Provider, conscientious helpers, dedicated to their duties to others

Ethan: INTP | The Logician, cold, quiet and analytical, they enjoy spending time alone

Étienne: INFP | The Healer, imaginative idealists, guided by their own values and beliefs

Alabaster: ENTP | The Visionary, inspired innovators, seeking new solutions to challenging problems

Lou Ellen: ISFJ | The Protector, industrious caretakers, loyal to traditions and institutions

Regulus: INTJ | The Mastermind, analytical problem-solvers, eager to improve systems and processes

Sirius: ENFP | The Champion, people-centered creators, motivated by possibilities and potential

Fun Fact #9: Sorting characters into Hogwarts houses (excluding the actual Hogwarts students of course)

Okay, so I believe that the Sorting Hat sorts students based on their values, not just their personality traits. Take Draco for example, he was sorted into Slytherin. Sure he's ambitious, but is he cunning, self-reliant, etc? Hell nah, dude cried for daddy for a majority of the books and he's not very sneaky if you think about it.

So yeah, I'll be sorting these guys based on their personality and what traits they value.

Ethan: Hufflepuff. HEAR ME OUT YOU GUYS. Hufflepuffs value justice and fairness. HE LITERALLY COMMITTED WAR CRIMES BECAUSE HE WANTED FAIRNESS, EQUALITY, AND JUSTICE, so yes, he is a Hufflepuff. Would he be the most terrifying Hufflepuff ever? Absolutely, but he'd be a Hufflepuff through and through 😌

Nico: Also a Hufflepuff 😂 He's so fucking loyal guys, remember when he learned about Camp Half-Blood and Camp Jupiter??? He had the chance to be a sneaky boi and pass info around, but he's a good boi and kept the secrets 😌 😌 😌

Annabeth: Slytherin. Sure she's smart and all, but I don't think she'd fit in with Ravenclaw since their version of knowledge is kinda... book-smarts. Annabeth's very ambitious, her fatal flaw's literally hubris, she's cunning, adaptable, resourceful, etc.

Percy: This was soooo hard for me, he fits all of them except for Ravenclaw. I decided to go for Hufflepuff instead because of his loyalty to his friends and shit

Étienne: Lololol ngl, if he was sorted, he'd threaten the Sorting Hat to pick Hufflepuff just 'cause Essie's there. But if he DIDN'T threaten the Hat, he'd probably be sorted into Slytherin. This dude is HELLA sneaky ok and cunning, he has no qualms with using his powers on people, he gets what he wants whenever he wants, etc, so we know he values those traits a lot.

Alabaster: Gryffindor. He's confident, courageous, and daring. Dude's not afraid to go against the gods, even after his side's already lost.

Lou Ellen: Hufflepuff (wow there's a lot of Hufflepuffs here lol). Two of the Hufflepuff traits are tolerance and patience and she's got a shit ton of them if she's able to stay sane while having such chaotic older siblings

Fun Fact #10: I... did not enjoy the Heroes of Olympus series...

Everything about it was a blur to me guys. The only things I remembered were:

- Percabeth in Tartarus

- That really short and horribly written battle with the Seven fighting alongside the gods to defeat the Giants

- The even worse "final battle" against Gaea

- Leo killed himself??? For lOvE??? What??? Whyyyyy

- Octavian dying lmao

- Some Reyna, Nico, and Coach Hedge scenes which were great

- Uhhhhh Percy's nose bleed

- And um............... I literally can't think of any more 💀 💀 💀

When I made the two routes, I had to go find a timeline for HOO and wooooow, I was pretty much like "did this really happen? I can't, for the life of me, remember". HOO WAS HONESTLY SUCH A FUCKING MESS. It was badly written, I'm sorry. It looked like Rick had a more broad idea of how the plot would be and then just winged it from there, unlike with the original PJO series where everything flowed well together and made sense.

There were just sooooo many useless plot points and the characters were butchered and then there was PIPER OMG, PIPER I FUCKING CAN'T WITH THAT GIRL 😩

But anyways, yeah. I did not enjoy HOO and writing for it is gonna be torture... The only thing I'm really looking forward to is the torturous original content I planned out in the Ethan Route 😈 😈 😈

Fun Fact #11: When thinking of ideas for the Ethan Route, I was, for a very brief second, contemplating on giving them a happy and healthy life... but my love for dark romance said "No❤️"

Sorry for those who were hoping for a cute and simple love story, I just can't deliver 😔

Fun Fact #12: The original draft for Étienne was a lot saner and genuinely pure! My idea was to make him a legacy of Trivia instead, where his great great grandma was a daughter of Trivia, making him Essie's great great nephew lol.

He would've had a nicer life too and would've been the genuinely pure and sweet little baby you all thought he was before, you know, I revealed him to be a lunatic. But I tossed that idea into the trashcan because that was boring. Instead, I made him the son of Trivia, and the product of a brief affair which led to the horrible, horrible relationship he has with his family now :)

Fun Fact #13: I GAVE OUT A HINT THAT ÉTIENNE WASN'T TO BE TRUSTED BUT NOBODY NOTICED IT ☹️

I was so sad ☹️

The hint's located in Book Four chapter "A Snake in the Grass". EVEN THE CHAPTER TITLE WAS A HINT ☹️ But anyways, if you remember the ending of the chapter, it was when Étienne was talking to Bernadine, who was telling him to leave Essie alone because she might end up "just like Topsy"

I thought that scene and the chapter title would be a good hint but I think only one person was sus ☹️☹️☹️

Fun Fact #14: Essie has a phone and while she rarely ever texts or makes calls with it, she still uses other apps that don't require her to send out communicative signals in the air to attract monsters (idk what it's called or how to explain it lol)

She has an Instagram! 95% of it is pics of Nico tho, the other 5% is other random shit like selfies, sneaky cute pics she took of Ethan, puppies, etc.

There was one time some old guy slid into her DMs to ask for feet pics and she was like wondering aloud "Why does this guy want pictures of my feet????".

*cue the running footsteps*

"ESSIE NO, WAIT!!!!!!"

Let's just say, Nico and Ethan have never sprinted so fucking fast before in all their lives 💀

(She's an innocent babey when it comes to those sorta things  🥺..... for now tho 🌚)

She's got a Tiktok too but she doesn't post vids or anything, she just browses around for entertainment. She doesn't have a Twitter because she doesn't see a need for it, has a Snapchat where she mostly takes pics of Nico, and she NEARLY got an OnlyFans because the Stolls told her it was an online shopping app and her dumb ass actually believed it until she excitedly told Ethan about how she was going to make an account there and he Shut That Shit Down™ real quick and told her the truth (he nearly strangled the Stolls that day too).

Fun Fact #15: I MADE ESSIE'S FAMILY TREE (the immortal side) FOR FUNSIES! I think I did it right, but here it is:

It's a fucking circle omfg, I'm dying  😂 😂 😂

If the gods were a normal family, these would be their relations to Essie

- Hecate and Regulus are her parents (duh)

- Asteria (Titaness of oracles, prophetic dreams, astrology and necromancy) and Perses (Titan of destruction and peace) are her grandparents

- Coeus (Titan of the North, resolve, and intelligence) and Phoebe (Titaness of bright intellect) are her great grandparents (damn, they shoulda given their brain cells to their great granddaughter tho fr 💀 💀 💀)

- Uranus (Primordial god of the skies and heavens) and Gaea (Primordial goddess of the Earth) are her great great grandparents

- Children of Uranus and Gaea are her great great uncles and aunts

- Astraeus (Titan of stars, planets, and the art of astrology) and Pallas (Titan of battle and warcraft) are her great uncles

- Leto is her great aunt

- Hecate has no siblings, so Essie doesn't have any immortal uncles or aunts

- Apollo and Artemis are her first cousins once removed

- Some of the Olympians (Hestia, Demeter, Hera, Hades, Poseidon, and Hades) are her first cousins twice removed

- The Olympians' children (so Percy, Bianca, Nico, Thalia, Jason, all the Demeter kids etc) are her second cousins once removed

Fun Fact #16: In the last book, I gave you guys a list of reasons as to why I picked Essan, and I should've done the same for why I didn't pick Jessie.

This isn't really a list, but this was my biggest reason as to why I didn't pick Jessie.

The relationship would've happened too quickly in my opinion. The Lost Hero begins and ends in December, and there's a time gap between that book and The Son of Neptune because after the quest to rescue Hera ended, they spent a few months building the Argo II so yeah.

But anyways, the last book of the HOO series, The Blood of Olympus, ended in the summer. August to be more specific.

That means, the entire series of HOO starts in December, then ends on August. That's only eight months, not even a full year. Essie and Jason only met each other twice before HOO and those were very short meetings. In The Lost Hero he's still struggling with his amnesia and because Essie is a decent person unlike Piper, she definitely wouldn't be trying to push him for a relationship at that time (in my Jason Route, I have them get together after TLH where he finally regains his memories but that's still just a little over a month of knowing him  💀).

Also, I had to take in the fact that Essie moving on that quickly was too unrealistic. In the Jason route, Essie literally lost her siblings and the love of her life, she killed countless of innocent people, and she's extremely traumatized after the war. My plan to have Jason "help" her made it even worse to me. Realistically, Essie would need a much muuuuuch longer recovery time to heal from the war, and having her date Jason right after The Lost Hero was just waaaaay too quick. I felt like I was glorifying her issues and making it seem like Jason "fixed" her.

So yeah. This was the biggest reason why I couldn't do Jessie ☹️

Fun Fact #17: Ethan's least favorite movie is Breaking Dawn (both parts) and yes he watched it when he was a kid. I think I mentioned this before in an older book, but before the war, a bunch of girls in the Hermes cabin wanted to have a Twilight marathon and Luke had no choice but to let it happen (he forced everyone else to watch it too so they can suffer with him). He hated it then, but he hates it even more now.

Like... think about it guys...

CAN YOU IMAGINE WATCHING A MOVIE WHERE ONE OF THE ACTRESSES LOOK SO SIMILAR TO YOUR GIRLFRIEND WHEN SHE WAS A CHILD? And that same actresses' character is paired up with some OLDER MAN like what the absolute fuck?!?!?!

Ethan's so disturbed by it, you best believe he's gonna boycott Twilight or some shit  😂 😂 😂

Fun Fact #18: Here's a fun list of songs that describe Essan perfectly  😌

Half of these songs are so fucking crazy, can you tell that I had fun picking them?? 😂

Monsters by All Time Low ft. Demi Lovato & Blackbear

I'm wondering,
why do all the monsters come out at night?
why do we sleep where we want to hide?
why do I run back to you like,
I don't mind if you fuck up my life

Yandere by Jazmin Bean (I'm sorry 😂)

You know I like you
And anyone who gets
In my way, darlin'
Might get a handful of some
Shit, or stay heavy-hearted

If I Killed Someone For You by Alec Benjamin (AM I WRONG THO)

Would you love me more
(Would you love me more)
If I killed someone for you?
Would you hold my hand?
(Would you hold my hand?)
They're the same ones that I used
When I killed someone for you

Cupid by Hurts

Bring my lover to her knees
Pierce her skin and make her fall in love with me
'Cause I swear that I'll make you bleed
If you break my heart when I hold you close to me

Lovesick Girls by Blackpink

Love is slippin' and fallin'
Love is killin' your darlin'
That fearless thrill returns once the pain subsides
Can't hear what you say
I'm happy with this pain
You pity me, but I pity you more for pitying me

Boyfriend by Alphabeat

This boy really drives you mad
And you know that ain't bad, oh yeah
You'll love him till you die

Meant To Be Yours by the Heathers Musical (I LOVE THIS MUSICAL)

Those assholes are the key!
They're keeping you away from me!
They made you blind, messed up your mind
But I can set you free!

If you have any more, pls comment here, I want more songs to listen to lmao

Fun Fact #19: This isn't a fact, but have you guys just... ever wondered what it would be like if the characters from my series ever met their canon selves??? Cuz like... the way I wrote some of canon characters in my books are so fucked up. They're just so much darker compared to their canon selves 😂

First off, Essie would be so sad that there isn't a second version of her :( but hey, there's two Ethans, two Nicos, two dads, two Sirius', and many more!

I'm pretty sure canon!Ethan would be like "wtf??? I have a girlfriend here???" if he found out about Essie. He'd be weirded out, but I wouldn't be surprised if he fell in love with Essie too, she's sweet and lovable like that. But if he ever met yandere!Ethan (we'll stick to calling him that cuz it's funny 😂 and let's face it... he really is one if you think about it  😭), he'd be so fucking horrified. His more darker counterpart literally kidnapped his girlfriend... locked her in a dog cage... gave her so much strife in her life... Canon!Ethan would be very disgusted with his other self, ngl.

Canon!Alabaster is soooo much softer and guilt-ridden after the death of his siblings. He would also be horrified by his darker counterpart if he found out about how the other Alabaster tried to brutally murdered his last living (original) sibling. Canon!Alabaster wouldn't hate Essie at all and would understand that she's innocent in their deaths.

Canon!Nico would be 👁️👄👁️ if he found out about his reincarnated mom. I think he would be lowkey jealous of his other self because he's a lot happier then him. Also, to him, happier!Nico seems a little... bratty when it comes to getting his mom's attention which is amusing but weird 😂 He definitely doesn't like Yandere!Ethan so he'd help the other Nico sabotage him 😆 (that'd be Yandere!Ethan's worst nightmare tho... two Nicos... the horror 😂😂😂)

CANON!SIRIUS WOULD BE SO FUCKING TERRIFIED! He could see the stress lines in uncle!Sirius' face and while he'd like Essie... he'd also be fucking scared of her especially if he found out SHE BASICALLY MIND-CONTROLLED HIM?! Like yeah she did it because she cared, but that's so fucked up! Then there's the fact that she's casual about murder?!?!? His other self looks like he's literally being driven crazy by all this dark shit going on and canon!Sirius would really pity him.

Canon!Regulus would be very relieved that there wasn't any hell or underworld back in his universe because, um, 10+ years of nonstop torture? No thanks! He'd also be a little concerned by Underworld!Regulus because he just seems so much more darker... And a little messed up in the head too... He does wanna know where he gets his books though 👀

Fun Fact #20: Here's a list of my top five most fucked up characters and my reasons why I place them there.

Alternate title "Top Five Yanderes"

(Warning: My explanations ended up a lot longer then I expected)

Starting from the least dangerous to the most:

Fifth place: Essie

Essie is hella fucking dangerous... BUT she's the least likely to go on a killing spree and she's also super sweet and friendly, which is why I placed her last. She's really only a danger to you if you're a threat to herself or her loved ones. She might use the Mist on you if you're like... a store employee, but that's only to get away with free stuff lol. Other then that, you're fine.

But she could also be a threat to you if you're a loved one. As you've noticed, she's extremely obsessive once you've earned her loyalty (which isn't very hard. She's been psychologically and physically beaten down so much, you literally just have to show her some affection and bam, she's yours). Most of the time, it's a good thing. You're pretty much guaranteed to live a safe life full of luxury (remember how she gave Sirius a legit penthouse???)... but if you're in danger and you don't listen to her, then expect to be mind-controlled.

The only good thing is that she'll feel a little bad while doing it. After she Charmspoke Sirius to leave the country, she felt some guilt for her actions because she knew she had just broken his trust... But then she tried to justify it afterwards to the point that she no longer cared that she had broken his trust, all she cared about was that Sirius was safe and sound. Plus, she literally tortured Crouch Sr (with encouragement from her daddy dearest) because he put Sirius in Azkaban without trial, then she went on to kill his son for putting Cedric and Harry in danger and then torturing him too. Essie is seriously ruthless to those who hurt her loved ones.

But if you're a loved one then count yourself somewhat lucky. She'll be so loving and sweet to you... as long as you obey her. Please, please just obey her, she really doesn't want to force you to do anything against your will.

Another factor that makes her so dangerous is her appearance. Like, seriously, she's so unassuming. People aren't going to look at her and think "oh she's deadly, I should stay away". She looks cute, she looks innocent, she even behaves that way sometimes, which makes people more likely to drop their guards around her and then BAM! You're dead. If she was evil, she could easily be the most predatory thing ever because of how easy it is for her to get people to fall at her feet. But she's NOT evil, so she'll only use this tactic on those she really doesn't like or if she's on a quest that requires her to be ✨sneaky✨

Violence: 6/10 (But she's not gonna go around stabbing people who piss her off, she has patience... with some limits)

Manipulation: 4/10 (Her manipulation's more based on the Mist, and she only uses it to control people when she absolutely needs to)

Willingness to kill: 9/10 (Hurt her or her loved ones in any way then you're dead. Remember the Death Eaters who attacked the Quidditch World Cup? Barty Crouch Jr? She really won't hesitate)

Fourth place: Ethan

This was probably obvious for all of you lol

But you might be wondering why he's only ranked fourth and not, idk second or something. Well that's easy because Ethan, like Essie, still has the ability to care about others (which means everyone else beyond him in this list don't have that ability, or it's strictly only centered around veeeery few people). If you remember, the main reason he joined Kronos was because he wanted the world to be a better place FOR EVERYONE, demigods, minor gods, mortals, etc. He wanted justice for those the Olympians hurt and wronged. This shows that he's not downright cruel, he's just a huge asshole lol.

He's kinda like Essie if you think about it. For Essie, you just gotta be nice to her and she's already attached to you. For Ethan, it's like that... but it takes a lot longer for him to get attached. But once he does get attached... hoo boy... 😅

If you remember from Book One, he was stated to not have any friends since everyone was so scared of him and his abilities. Essie was his only friend. He doesn't even have any family anymore since he ran away from home and his mom's a goddess so Ancient Laws keep her away. That means all this love that he's supposed to be spreading throughout other people are solely pushed onto Essie instead, and that's a lot of love for just one person to handle.

So in other words, he's obsessive. Everyone else to him is literally just Essies and non-Essies ("I treat all Essies and non-Essies equally" lololol). He has some other bonds like his close friendship with Alabaster, but Alabaster is no longer around, so his only close friend is Essie, once again. He's tolerating Nico and is actually lowkey soft on the kid so we'll see how that goes. But other then that, it's all just Essie.

He cannot bare to lose her, so he resorts to kidnapping her to keep her close. He always wants to keep her close, but thankfully that urge has lessened since the war ended... But then the urge returned when he found out about the Fates visiting her and Sirius.

Remember the IM message they had? The second he saw how distraught Essie was about how her uncle's been treating her, Ethan no longer gave a shit about Sirius or the possibility of him being in danger. He even tries to turn her against him by saying shit like "he made you cry, so who cares about him?" and "he doesn't love you anymore". When she said that Sirius 'hated her' his response was basically "then forget him". He didn't even try to reassure her that she was wrong. His main focus was getting Essie back to New York so she would be safe, he did not care if that meant further straining Essie and Sirius' relationship or even Sirius' death. So like Essie, he will do whatever means necessary to keep his loved ones safe.

Other then that, he's also pretty violent. He has anger issues and I don't think I ever mentioned it before but his fatal flaw is wrath for the same reasons as Luke's. He has no issues with resorting to violence when he's pissed and he has a penchant for vengeance; putting his dad in prison and then pretty much just slaughtering Caleb Warring, a boy who used to bully him when he was younger.

THE MOST SCARIEST THING ABOUT HIM... are his powers. Just think about it! He can literally make horrible things happen to you. Oh you were being racist towards him? Watch out when going down the stairs then, you might trip on air and snap your neck. Hit on his girlfriend? Expect to be violently run over when trying to cross the street. You're a billionaire who exploits from the poor and he just doesn't like you? Expect all your dirty secrets to be exposed, all profits coming to your company to stop, your bank account to go dry, your home to be taken away, etc (I actually approve of this one lmao). His powers are terrifying because he doesn't even need to physically do any of the work for all this to happen. It's all karma/luck manipulation. Even if you knew he was the cause of all of this, there's no way to prove it because his powers are so subtle with no physical manifestation like Essie's, Jason's, and Percy's, etc.

(also, the cool thing about subtle powers is that it saves me the effort of trying to explain how it works cuz I still don't fucking know how 🙃)

Violence: 10/10 (This one is obvious... Only very few people are safe from his wrath)

Manipulation: 3/10 (His manipulative side isn't that strong since it's only just starting to show)

Willingness to kill: 9/10 (Just like previously stated, only very few people are safe from his wrath, so if you're not any of these people, then he'll be willing to kill you if he has to or if you piss him off enough)

Third place: Alabaster

Okay so Alabaster had very heroic reasons to join Kronos' Army too (he wanted to bring justice to his mother and all the other minor gods, wanted all demigods and gods to be treated equally, wanted to end the Olympians' abusive regime, etc), but he's also way too dedicated to his goals...

He's so blinded by it that he was willing to put his siblings in danger. Yeah being on the side of the gods was rough, but he literally manipulated his siblings to follow him to the dark side (lol). He even did that to his 8-9 year old little half-brother Aiden, like who goes up to a child and says "Hey let's go defect from the camp and join the army full of Titans and monsters, this totally won't backfire on us and we'll totally be safe 24/7" 💀 💀

And he's a creep. If you read the scenes about him more closely, he kinda has a brother and sister complex towards all of his little siblings??? Even with Lou Ellen he had those vibes—he hunted her down and tried to kill Basil and the Stolls because they were in his way. His relationship with Essie's so weird too, he tries to manipulate her to join Kronos, berates her opinions, then he goes and protects her from Luke and sets her free, but then gaslights her, and tries to brutally murder her as act of vengeance for his siblings... HE LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED HER SO MUCH THAT HE'S ALL SHE SEES IN HER NIGHTMARES!!!

Remember when Ethan kidnapped Essie? Alabaster told him not to go too far, but Ethan did it anyways and you remember how Alabaster reacted? When he saw his own sister in a cage, he was pissed... but only for a few seconds. After that he was all "okay fine, keep her in there as long as you need to, just make sure she comes here in one piece and shit".

I gave a small hint that he was a stalker too. If you go back to the Book Four chapter "Lovesick Fools" the whole reason Ethan was able to find out where Essie lived was because Alabaster told him (you guys were probably distracted by the kissing scenes tho, so I don't blame you for not noticing it lol). He knows where his little sister lives, he also fucking hunted down his other little sister, so yeah. Again, he's a creep.

HE WAS ALSO IN CHARGE OF THE DEMIGOD ARMY! He trained them! Taught them how to kill and everything! He probably helped plan attacks too so we know he's hella smart and strategic!!!

Violence: 7/10 (He doesn't go around needlessly killing people, but whenever he does, he's fucking brutal about it)

Manipulation: 9/10 (Boy manipulated all of his siblings save for Lou Ellen, but he manipulated Essie the most through threats, gaslighting, passive-aggressiveness, dishonesty, and isolating her from her loved ones—her siblings in this case)

Willingness to kill: 9/10 (Anyone who gets in the way of his goals will be killed by him. The Olympians and those who fight for them, and a more specific example are Basil and the Stolls for getting in the way of him kidnapping his sisters)

Second place: Regulus

If your name isn't Esmerelda Adhafera Black, Sirius Orion Black III or Kreacher, then he does not give a shit about you. The homeless? He'll only care if they're his brother, daughter, or house elf. Starving people? He'll only care if they're his brother, daughter or house elf. You could literally be in danger of being cut in half and the only way to save you is to press an easily accessible button, and Regulus still wouldn't give a shit unless you were Essie, Sirius, or Kreacher. The button could be shoved right into his hands and he'd just go "sucks to be you" and just leave it on the ground before walking away.

Unlike with Ethan who can tolerate a couple of people and still care for them, REGULUS ONLY CARES FOR ESSIE, SIRIUS, AND KREACHER! Yeah he's met Nico and is aware of his connection with Essie and is fond of him, but if he had to pick between Nico and Essie, he would pick Essie in a heartbeat and not feel an ounce of guilt for letting Nico die. He might go, "well, what a shame" but that's it.

"But what about when he defected from the Death Eaters and tried to take down Voldy?! Doesn't that mean he cares about Muggles and Muggle-borns?"

HALF OF THE REASON HE DID THAT WAS FOR ESSIE. He didn't want her to be raised in a war, and he knew she would be in danger if people found out that he went and had a baby with an unknown woman. He can't go around telling people that she's half god either, so people might assume she's not pureblood and have her killed. He could not risk that. The other half was because he knew taking Voldemort down was the right thing to do, because he cared and felt guilty for all the horrible things he did...

...But unfortunately he died and was tortured in the Underworld for 10+ years, so 99% of his kindness kinda just went away thanks to all that 🙂

He's now only focused on Essie and Sirius (and Kreacher too but I haven't written much on that, sorry). He's become so much darker then when he was alive and so much more lonely. There were times where he wanted to KEEP his own daughter with him so she could never leave. He's thought about this several times actually. And another thing, he also approved of Essie using the Mist to force Sirius to leave. He genuinely doesn't understand why his brother was so upset about it either. He encourages Essie to use the Mist to manipulate people because that's what he does too (but with words and cunning rather then superpowers)

I haven't written much about it yet, but back when he was still alive, Regulus was probably an expert manipulator if you think about it. He was not only raised in the cutthroat pureblood society, but he was also raised as a Black, and that couldn't have been an easy life. He was the heir, the future head of the family. They were probably very involved in politics and constantly on the spotlight so of course he had to learn how to read people's emotions and body language, while also learning how to manipulate them. Those are probably necessary life skills to survive in the Black family. I also mentioned that he was teaching himself Legilimency so imagine how much more dangerous he would be if he actually had his wand with him...

Lastly, he was a Death Eater. He didn't just kill people, he tortured, kidnapped, blackmailed, and did all kinds of horrible things to innocent people. Even though he didn't like what he was doing, you can't deny that that sorta stuff did some irreparable damage to his psyche. Plus, like I said, his torture in the Underworld caused him to stop caring about those kind of things...

Violence: 4/10 (He's not destructive, he has some chill)

Manipulation: 100/10 (Bitch is a mastermind when it comes to this. He reads emotions and body language very well, there are just some times where he doesn't understand why a person feels that certain emotion, like the situation with Sirius and the mind-control)

Willingness to kill: 10/10 (He killed Rookwood for insulting baby Essie and discovering her existence. He could've just used a Memory charm, but nooooo he had to kill the dude)

First place: Étienne

Wow what a surprise 😮 You guys totally weren't expecting this, I know. So shocking... 😮

HE IS 100% A SOCIOPATH! HE FITS THE BILL!

- Superficial charm

- Impulsive behavior

- Never apologizes, but when they do, they don't mean it

- Presents themselves as innocent

- Incites emotional chaos

- Devoid of remorse or empathy

- Untruthful and manipulative

SEE WHAT I MEAN??? HE'S A SOCIOPATH WITH TERRIFYING POWERS!!!!

Sociopaths, however, are still able to form close and almost normal relationships that are genuine (that's one of the traits that separate sociopathy from psychopathy). Étienne has been rejected by his entire family and society, it makes him crave love and acceptance. When he came to Hogwarts he followed Essie and Cedric around because they made him feel loved and accepted, but he knew he would scare them off if they knew what he was really like so he kept himself sweet and docile. When it was time for him to leave, he was no longer able to contact Cedric so he's safe. Essie, however made the mistake of promising to see him again so now Étienne's going to continue clinging on to her (but at least she can actually handle him).

He may be as emotional as a fucking baby, but he's sooooo fucking manipulative guys, trust me. Don't underestimate him even when he starts sobbing and begging. Remember when he exposed himself as a crazy babey??? Essie described him as putting on a vulnerable face by making himself seem smaller and all that. HE PURPOSELY DID THAT IN HOPES THAT ESSIE WOULD LET HER GUARD DOWN!!!

He knows what she wants from him and what her limitations with him are. When he attacked Bernadine, she calmly told him not to do that and gave him a sorta lecture on how wrong it was while comforting him when he cried. When he tried to kill Theodore, she was a lot more firmer, using her powers to counter his own and getting Theodore away. So because of that, he knows that she'll put her foot down on him killing someone, but she'll be more lenient if he were to do just a little harm. So that's what he'll do next. He'll hurt people, but not to the point of killing them because he knows murdering innocent people is what's gonna get her to leave.

He's also hella violent as you already know. He terrorized his family. He literally trained himself on how to use the Mist for the sole purpose of hurting them AND HE DIDN'T EVEN UNDERSTAND WHAT THE MIST WAS! He just knew he could do weird shit and went with it! He's scarily smart! And sure he sometimes has magical outbursts because he can't control his powers, but he doesn't even feel guilty about them. The only time he felt bad was when he killed Topsy because Topsy was his main caretaker whenever his father was gone. Other then that, he didn't care who he hurt and he admittedly ENJOYS their pain too! He's a fucking sadist. The other characters either feel a lil remorse or don't care, but he LIKES hurting people and that's the main reason why I put him as number one.

Violence: 10/10 (He's destructive, out of control and just plain deadly)

Manipulation: 10/10 (He's not a master manipulator like Regulus tho, so Regulus still owns that crown)

Willingness to kill: 100/10 (Without a doubt he'll kill people and he doesn't even need a good reason to do it. Even worse, he'll most likely kill while smiling and laughing)

These are just my opinions though 😌, but what do you think? Do you agree with the rankings? Disagree? Wanna add on??

AND THAT'LL BE THE END OF FUN FACTS PART 2!!! I literally tired myself out writing the final fact lmao.

Idk when I'll post the next chapter btw. You guys probably know this, but I like to write ahead. Problem is that I only just finished writing Chapter Ten and that's just... not enough for me? I try to be 15 chapters ahead so I'm really paranoid about this. I don't know when I'll be able to post the next chapter because of this, BUT I'm on my spring break so I have a lot of free time to write out a bunch of chapters, so let's hope I can make a bunch before break ends!