{⚠•Warning Mature Content•⚠}

Yeah, quick disclaimer. You should know this is not how I write my songs if you know me. I tried to capture that feeling and since I have no idea, I tried my level best. Which wasn't really a lot.

I guess I could have done better.
Maybe a joint I shouldn't have toked.
But it makes it better, better, somehow.

I guess I didn't try harder.
My throat feels like it's sore
Rummaging in a desert, and it now hurts.

I guess if I die alone, at least I smiled.

*****

I guess you didn't listen.
For all the f*cks I gave for you.
You snapped me like fine ribbon, and it's been done.

I guess I should've stayed back.

I guess I could, leave it alone, fear of leaving the home of ours.
But f*ck it, you never meant to leave me loved.
I'll slit another vein, wince in the pain
Smoke another blunt and be honest.

I'm dying alone, left never never love.
But hey, at least I smiled.

*****

I light another match, thinking bout you again, thoughts on my mind.
And I've been wondering, been suffering, right now.

Break my heart again. Break it up, smash it up. Like the stars above.

I'll shine better than I ever did with you.
I thought it was love, but all it ended up being was lust.

I'd think it'd be easier, easier somehow.

Hey, hey. My love is a prison, I'll keep you tightly wound.
Someday, you'll know better than to break my heart.
I guess I didn't do much.
But I know how to figure it out.

I know that, this moon, you won't be living in our home.

*****

Get out. F*ck off. F*ck your feelings and the love you never gave.

Crumble, like dust. Sl*t, I ain't gonna let you in.

F*ck you. F*ck you. This never was love.
I guess it was lust.
And I take another toke.

*****

F*ck you. F*ck all the things I ever stood for.

F*ck you. I never wanted you anyway.

F*ck you. F*ck all the times you never locked lips

F*ck that.

F*ck this.......

*****

I take another joint. I smoke the grass all again.
I smoke it up, I whisk it in, like the love which ended in pain.

I loved you. I love you for all that you were. But you changed. And it's time I smile too......