Y/n started to feel better as the party went on, she slowed down on the drinks (Emily was happy about that), she walked around eating the food of the tables placed around the house. She stopped and was about to take a grape. When Jane came up to the table, Y/n and Jane had a weird relationship, she was a bitch to Y/n so in return Y/n was a bitch to her, but also Jane had done some lovely stuff towards Y/n, but Jane was normally stuck-up to everyone who she believes is lower then herself.

"What Jane?" Y/n asked already getting a headache. Emily kept her eyes on both of them. Y/n isn't below tripping this girl when she isn't looking.

Y/n and Jane talked for a little before Jane started being rude again acting like she is higher than Y/n, and she is, Y/n came from a poor family but she doesn't like people speaking poorly against her family or their status.

"Jane, I am getting a headache with every word you utter" Y/n gave her a sarcastic smile and then walked off to find Sue. Pushing through the large crowd of family and friends. The guests all started to fill into the dinning room, all looking for their name tags, Y/n's name tagged was next to Emily and Jane. "Ben come sit over here" Emily gestured to the seat at the end of the table where her mother would normally sit. "But doesn't your mother sit there" He asked her softly, She nodded "yes but not if she won't come down" Emily laughed a little, but it was a sad thing for her mother to be so sad that she won't even come down for her family.

"Where is my sister i'm beginning to worry" Aunt Lavinia asked, as she leaned over to emily, but not before Emily's mothers voices came down the stairs as she walked a little clumsily and Emily shot Y/n a pointed look. 'What' she mouthed back with an innocent smile, Emily was thinking about how Y/n drank drink after drink, and still wouldn't tell her why. Emily had caught her before that staring off into space. Y/n quickly went to help Sue with the gravy. The seating placement changed as everyone shuffled around to make room and Y/n quickly went into the kitchen to fetch another plate and utensils and placed them in front of Mrs Dickinson "Thank you dear" She gave a smile which she returned as she sat down Emily gripped her hand under the table and out of view from anyone 'are you okay?' Emily mouthed as Austin came in announcing dinner is served placing the turkey in the centre of the table. 'I'm fine' She mouthed back and gave Emily's hand a squeeze.

The sounds of utensils scrapping on plates and muttering of talking filled the room with a sense of calmness, a peace. Y/n still hated Christmas without Mary, but she had to learn to move on, to keep going for her older sister. She needed to find peace in her death. Because Mary wouldn't want her to be lost on the holiday and unhappy. Y/n listened in to the different conversations, Aunt Lavinia felt reborn after her trip. A widow has morning her husband's death. " So Y/n, Sue, How was your trip to boston?" One of the relatives asked, Mrs dickinson must have told them, Sue and Y/n went to boston.  Emily stiffen up against Y/n, She felt it in the way Emily's hand gripped hers "Oh it was wonderful, i met this older woman and she helped me write my music by letting me borrow her piano" Y/n sparked up, even if she didn't leave on the best of intentions, she still had a wonderful time, not matter how much her heart did ache. "Did you meet anyone special?" Again the the husband talk, is that all anyone talks about? "Yes i did, He was very nice and we meet as i worked as one of the maids to the inn i was staying in" Wrong it was actually because i worked on pouring the drinks but detail..details

"Can we see anything in the future?" The women asked already invested in the converation. Emily's jaw tensed as she continued to eat her food.

"No, he was just a friend." Y/n stated clearing any intention others had, it was weird for a beautiful women like Y/n to be unmarried or without a husband, and for her to be with Emily twenty four seven, it was unnatural if you will.

It was stupid for Emily to feel any sort of jealousy at the act of Y/n talking to a guy, and she could imagine that he was very charming and flirtatious when faced with a women as beautiful and intelligent as Y/n, it was stupid expecally when she, herself isn't give her songbird the attention she deserves, but yet would dare to get upset or feel inferior when another man offers her the same amount of attention and more.

She mine. A greedy voice in the back of Emily's head said as she listened to the old lady rant about for its unnatural for women this young to be unmarried, then bring she into the equation. But she's not she stopped being the moment you kissed George, or the moment you started falling for Ben, it happened the exact moment, no matter how far away she was, that's how it happened.

It doesn't matter if it was a poets love, two souls that are the same meeting. two souls that are destined to always fit bo matter how they try to fit it would always work, and society would expect them as one. Never Y/n and Emily, the are always Destinate to be ever changing pieces, they fit only one way but are so hard to pull apart, but yet so easy to break and once you break it once or twice, tiny cracks start breaking it more pulling peace's off slowly. It still happened and it doesn't change that.

Y/n and Sue could both see the glance from across the table Emily and Ben were giving each other. Y/n really at this point wanted a hole to swallow her so she could get away from those two. "Is that what happens when you marry your cousin?" Jane asked 

"Maybe i should write a travel book?" Louisa muttered, as she picked at her bread. Aunt lavinia agreed wholeheartedly about writing a travel book "Oh you should, experience everything. Live all your dreams." Aunt lavinia stated, she was a big preacher in doing everything you can and making life worth living "Oh no, i'm just about the money. I'm just about that hustle so.." She trailed off as everyone looked at her, Y/n wanted to smack a hand over her head at the women's statement. 

"Listen girls..girls." Aunt lavinia mostoned for the girl to all look at her "If you want something in the life you just have to reach out a grab it" Aunt lavinia reached out into the open air with both her arms stretched out and grabbed at the air. Mrs dickinson grabbed the jug full of wine and poured it into her cup. 

"Sue you wouldn't go on a cruise after i die would you?" Austin asked in a joking tone 

"Yes cause i would take her" Y/n said jokingly back as she tore a piece of bread in her hands and ate it. Louisa kept saying ideas for different books but then shutting them down cause they sounded boring like a man chasing a whale. Even if the girl was only in it for the money, the girl had a talent in coming up with different ideas byt the hundreds "Lavinia can you pass the cranberry sauce?" Emily asked with her hand extended over the table towards lavinia, She made a noise, before reaching over with a stiffened arm and paced Sue the cranberry sauce to pass to Emily. 

The Widow across the table started asking Sue and Austin about how they should have their wedding soon. "Well, it takes a while to plan a wedding. And we're building our own house." Jane lit up, "So, I guess I'll be having my wedding first, then." She said as she held up her ring finger as it adorned a big ring. Everyone cheered for her as Sue looked Sullen, Jane had to ruin the moment. "Yes, yeah, I'm engaged. That's right. To William Wilkinson. He's a harness manufacturer. We're moving to Southwick." She explained as everyone went to reach for more helpings of food. 

A small moan came from Lavinia as she tried to cover it up " I'm just..." She took a little bit to get out what she was going to say "Really excited your getting Married.." She said softly. Everyone stared at her for a second. "Congratulations Jane" Y/n muttered softly. 

"I just feel so sad.." Everyone turned their attention to Mrs Dickinson "For who mum?" Austin asked, confused by His mum's statement. "For Emily and Y/n..I mean Y/n's met someone..but Emily's still far behind." Mrs Dickinson said in her drunken haze "Mum don't" Emily whispered as she looked from Ben to her Mother and back again "Would it make you feel better if you invited the man Y/n met?" Jane piped up. "No." Emily and Sue both said at the same time, it was quickly but still landed as quite a shock to everyone at the table about how quickly both women protested. Sue sure that was reasonable, But Emily why wouldn't she want her best friend to be happily married. "Why not Emily?" Jane pressed, she knew how to twist a knife to draw blood, and that's what she wanted to do. "Hey Jane, I think you have a bug on your dress?" Before jane could freak out Y/n quickly got it and went to release it outside, It also gave her time to think as well, as the cold air nipped at her skin. She cleared her head quickly before returning she didn't need to anyone to ask question about why she was gone for so long. "It's something about family-" She heard as she opened and shut the front door and walked to her seat. 

"and it's a family with no father...and just a bunch of sister and their mum.. and it starts on Christmas." She voiced the ideas, to be fair it did sound like a good book, "Oh that doesn't sound like a hit." well in Y/n's opinion but not in Janes apparently. "Well yeah but what if one of the sisters dies" Lavinia let out a loud moan causing the whole table to go silent as they all turn to look at her "That's just so sad.." She tried to cover it up "The dinner continued "what is going on with lavinia?" Emily whispered into Y/n's ear, Y/n leaned over to Emily's ear cover her mouth around emily's ear so no one could read her lips "Laviana is getting fingered by the guy next to her...what's his name?..i forgot he hit on me once and i have erased him from my mind" 

"Wait so what's he doing?" Emily asked again as her mind flashed red at what Y/n just said about the guy, Y/n moved her hand to make the motion on Emily's thigh, a memory flashed in her mind of the night after they broke into the college, she felt herself and the room getting hotter, not all her memory and herself wanted to see was Y/n's naked body with her own. She was quickly snapped out if it by Y/n talking "that but in her you know" Emily had heard enough and felt like she was going to gag. 

The dinner quickly finished after that and everyone gathered in the living room to listen to everyone sing and play the piano. Emily was pointed out the different decorations before Y/n walked by taking her hand and emily followed being little pulled along, as Y/n's thumb grazed along her knuckles. Her smile dropped at the unhappy look written all over her lovers face. "You have to stop throwing yourself at him." Y/n said directly A small smile creeped up on Emily's face "what? who?" 

"He's a married man, Em. You're embarrassing yourself." Sue and Austin walked up to the two, Austin carrying Sue and his own drink, Sue carrying her sisters, as she passed it off to her, Y/n downed it in a second before walking off a to get another. Her sister was pissed "what did you do?" Sue whispered pulling Emily off with her for a second "I didn't do anything"

"I don't believe you" Sue hissed, her eyes narrowing on the girl, "is this cause of Ben?" Emily's silence spoke volumes. "Stop it Emily. You're hurting her." Sue said, which made Emily frown, she wasn't hurting Y/n was she?? No. She wasn't?? No more then Sue getting married already hurt her. The two women walked back to the group, Y/n had returned and was standing next to Austin. "Isn't it crazy to think next year we'll be spending christmas in our own house?" Austin asked excitedly. Ben appeared to the group. "Thank you for making me stay" He looked at Emily and she looked down at the ground shyly.  "I wouldn't want to spend christmas alone." 

"Why aren't you with your wife?" Y/n stated boldly, she was still mad everyone in the group could tell. "She's traveling at the moment...abroad." Sue smiled into her hand at how bold Y/n was with the question, Y/n raised her eyebrows in surprise. He's lying  

"Traveling. Really?" Emily nodded along. "Let's hope she's not on a cruise with a bunch old lusty spaniards, like aunt Lavinia." Ben laughed as they all looked to see Aunt Lavinia and Ithamar kissing under a mistletoe That she was holding "Oh no no no". Ben said laughing as Emily joined in and Sue being polite. "Hey, i like your cravat." Emily touched Bens upper arm. "Oh thanks, Its my christmas cravat." Austin said standing up prouder "Very cool" 

"I like this guy" Austin exclaimed wrapping an arm over his shoulders "Even though dad gave him my promotion." Austin joked, Ben was quick to speak up "Oh you are welcome to take my place anytime. Those law cases are endless." 

Mrs Dickinson  started to drunkenly sing high pitched, as lavinia and Aunt lavinia started to sing with her, as they slowly started to walk her upstairs, the piano was now unoccupied "Why don't you sing something Sue?" Austin piped up. "oh no i'm not much of a singer" She then slowly turned to Y/n on her right "butt my sister is.." "wha-" Sue nudges her ribs. "Come on for me play something for me?"

"Okay.." Y/n past her drink to her sister "...for Emily" Emily caught Y/n's (Y/E/C) eyes for a brief moment, before she reached the piano and sat down.

Y/n took a breath before playing a few notes. Emily saw her hesitations and took a small step forward, it was small and unnoticeable, except by Sue who watch Emily's movement. She started playing the notes.

When Y/n started singing, Emily felt the room slow, time stop, no one moved and it felt as though no one was breathing.

"Beats fast Colors and promises. How to be brave? How can I love when I'm afraid to fall? But watching you stand alone All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow." Emily thought of everything the two have ever been through the good, the bad, and everything in between.

Emily and Y/n had their fights and most of them petty, but they always came back, no matter what. Emily loved everything about Y/n, the way she talked, her smile, her eyes, her nose, her hands, her lips. Emily could stare at her all the time, she has, she always has, whether Y/n's standing across the room, with Sue and Austin, or in a crowd of a thousand people, she always found Y/n no matter what.

"One step closer, I have died every day waiting for you Darling, don't be afraid I have loved you for a thousand years I'll love you for a thousand more" Emily knew this song was about them, and even if she could be wrong she hoped she wasn't, She didn't want this song to be about anyone else. Emily knew she was messing up, because of Ben. She knew Y/n felt neglected. She knew that. But she also knew that Ben helped her when Y/n was away. He loved her like the way, Y/n loved her, and in Emily's mind there was a huge difference between the two. But the only one similarity was that they both loved Emily maybe in different ways, maybe in the same way.

One thing about Y/n is that no matter what, if she knows that someone would look after Emily, she would let them have her hand. Even if it hurt, she would, because she cares to deeply about the poet to not. Emily never wanted a suitor she was content with her songbird. But she met someone who loved her poems just as much, and she couldn't help but fall for him.

"One step closer, One step closer I have died every day waiting for you Darling, don't be afraid I have loved you for a thousand years I'll love you for a thousand more And all along I believed I would find you Time has brought your heart to me I have loved you for a thousand years I'll love you for a thousand more"

Y/n played the last note on the piano, before the sound of silence was replaced with a wild round of applause. Y/n stood up from the seat and turned around, her E/C eyes met Emily's brown eyes immediately, Sue shouted for her to take a bow. So she took a bow but her eyes never left Emily's. 

----

Everyone all left, Y/n went into Emily's room as she went to see her mother. Sue entered Emily's room "I'll miss you when your gone" Y/n said as Sue laid down in Emily's bed beside her. "I will too, buuttt" Sue streached the but "We will be making you a room, so you can stay with us whenever you like. Austin's idea. He said you can decorate it how ever you want" Y/n's eyes widened "oh my god, are you serious?" Y/n launched herself at Sue and engulfed her in a big hug. The two girls laughed as the fell on the floor. "Even after i marry Austin, You will always be my favourite girl, You know that right?" Y/n nodded as she helped Sue up off the ground and they both laid back on the bed. 

The door opened as Emily walk in only expecting to see one body not two when she turned around to climb into bed after taking off her shawel. "Boo, tricked you" Sue jump scared Emily as she got up and went to walk back to Austin's room. "Tell Austin i said thank you" Y/n piped up. 

Emily laid in Sue's place, her leaning on her stomach her arms propping herself up. "Tell Austin thank you for what?" Emily asked curiously "Oh Austin and Sue are building me a room for me to stay in or to live in whenever i like." Emily looked at her confused "I thought we were staying together or we were renovating Austin's room." Y/n's smile dropped "well i thought that You and Ben would be spending all your time together so i would just move in with Sue and try to make some other friends...I don't know meet a guy, preferably another women" Emily looked stunned by the last comment.

"Well i mean that doesn't mean you have to move houses- He won't be- i mean you-" Emily couldn't talk she kept stumbling excuse after excuse "I mean i don't have to leave immediately they just have a room for me so i'm not cramped up in this one" Y/n gestured to the small room. "Or i mean you don't have to leave at all and we can get you another be-?" Emily offered but her rambling was cut off by Y/n's lips on hers "Calm down, babe" Y/n said when she pulled away. 

They needed to talk about what happened today, so Y/n started "So, He's not really married, is he?" Emily smiled and exhaled sharply out her nose. "No the rings a fake" Emily said as she twirled her own ring on her neck, "Did he ask about this?" Y/n tapped the necklace, Emily twirled on her neck. "Yeah, He um also asked about yours and if i was married" Y/n giggled "Why would he ask if you are married?" Y/n asked 

"Um that may be because i wore mine on my wedding finger" Emily responded, Emily could swear she hear Y/n's breath hitch "Why did you take it off?" Y/n said slowly.

"Didn't want you getting the wrong idea? That i married someone else" Y/n sighed

"So the ring is a fake" Y/n confirmed and Emily nodded "Yeah well, the way he looks at you, it better be." Y/n said quietly as her eyes looked up to look into Emily's. She smiled, Y/n knew what love looked like, what it felt like. What it sounded like. And that's was Emily was, she was in love with Ben. And Y/n couldn't stomach that.

"I have to tell you.." Y/n trailed off, as Emily looked at her with nothing but love and admiration. "I never thought i'd have to be jealous of a man stealing your heart" 

"You're Jealous?" Emily asked, there it was the feeling of the room getting hot again. "Maybe" Y/n confessed shyly as she let her eyes move down to the bed. "A little"  A smile crept up on Emily's face. "I guess it was selfish of me to think that everything would stay the same, frozen as soon as Sue got married. That i would be hoping and waiting for you to give me anytime of day like when we were little and Sue just doesn't get married. That we could be how we use to be before we got together.." Emily froze at that. "It was selfish of me to think that we would always be us, in love, together and held together by years of friendship" Tears glistened in Y/n's eyes as she talked. The girl inhaled a breath before exhaling "so..why him?" 

"I guess i'm learning from him" Emily shrugged as she talked she had a massive smile on her face. 

"Learning?" Y/n asked confused, her brows frowned slightly. "Learning what?

"Like, maybe a man and a woman don't have to get married. Maybe there are other possibilities, other ways to share a life." Emily explained, Y/n didn't know what she meant, she was confused, built into the society is the social constructs that a woman marries a man, bores his children, stays in the kitchen and does as he says. "I don't know what you mean." 

"I don't exactly know myself" The silence between the grew "I just feel like i can be honest with him. I can trust that when i speak a word, he hears it. He gets its meaning" Y/n thought for a moment before it came to her

"A poet's definition of love." Emily studied her songbirds face, mapping out everything, ever detail and converting it to memory. "Yeah" She said with a smile, Y/n glides the back of her finger from Emily's cheek to her jaw drawing little patterns as Emily leans into her touch

"And the only person that's ever made me feel that way before..." Emily takes Y/n's hand in her own and kisses her knuckles and then her wrist. "Was you?" Before Y/n could say anything a loud creak echoed through their room. "What was that?" Y/n whispered grabbing on to Emily's arm as the two girls looked alarmed "A ghost?" Y/n asked looking at Emily for the answer

"No it's probably just a goblin" Emily said as she and Y/n shuffled closer together cheek to cheek, held in each others arms to protect themselves from the goblin. They were terrified of them when they were younger. 

The snow came down outside filling the ground with freshly fallen snow that glistens in the sun.

______

Merry late christmas, i was trying to get this out by christmas, but it's a few days late anyway i hope you all had a wonderful christmas 

Question of the day:

I do not have one