So Jake and I had hit a rough patch.

We recently went on a Chorus trip. And that's when he started to sort of ignore me. We barely talked. He barely acknowledged me. We planned to spend time together at Sixflags, however he decided to join a different group.

I was...very hurt, when he decided to join a different group. We had planned to hang out, and originally we were in the same group until that fell through and suddenly it was 'Find three other people and that's your group.' What hurt the most was Jake was next to me, and when the was announced someone quickly went 'You and us' to Jake, leaving me, Logan, and Karissa a bit upset, me especially. My friend Josiah joined our group, in a similar situation as I. We were both quite upset at the whole group thing, but in the end, I guess it was okay. Josiah was my moral support and I his. He reassured me a bunch of times on rollercoasters that I wouldn't die. cx We also had a conversation about relationship problems, and turns out his ex, who he is still very much in love with, did the same to him. He felt bad, because he knew the pain.

I guess Jake was jealous of Josiah, but that's honestly on him. He joined a different group. Josiah happened to join mine. But I don't know why he got so jealous, he knows I'm his, he should've been able to tell by how I was so worried when he was ignoring me. I approached Jake about him ignoring me, and he just said I wasn't a problem, and that he could hang out with other people too. But he didn't realize that I could be standing right next to him, and he wouldn't look or speak to me. It was painful

I was...terrified, that I was going to lose Jake. It felt like my old relationship with Joey all over again. I was constantly fretting; and this carried on well after the trip.

He did, save me a seat at dinner on the way home from Atlanta, insisting it was my seat, which gave me hope. But the next few days at school after that were just different. Our silence was loud in my head.

However, everything finally went back to normal on Thursday, which I was insanely happy about. I was terrified. Terrified and lost. <3

He kept telling me I did nothing wrong and that he was just tired, but I still always feel like I'm the problem when anyone stops talking to me.

However, Jakely is still as strong and awkward as ever.

Ily JDB. ❤️ Awkward hugs forever.