Part - 18

"The Most Painful Thing In Life Is Losing Yourself In The Process Of Valuing Someone Too Much & Forgetting That You Are Special Too"

(Writer's POV)

"Karthik? Can I ride the bike?" Mithra asks.

"You know to ride?" Karthik asks back in surprise.

"Well, you can teach me, always" she says & bites her lips anticipating for his reply.

"It's getting late, Mithra" he says checking the time on his wrist watch.

"Please, Karthik" she asks cutely. Sighing, he moves back on the bike seat & lets her climb in front of him & take hold of the handlebar. He places his hands on top of her hands so that she won't lose her control in the handlebar.

"You ready" Karthik asks.

"Yep!" she nods excitedly & hits his chin with her head.

"Ow!" he winces.

"OMG! Sorry! Sorry!"

"Keep your head straight" he chides.

"Okay"

"Change the gear" Karthik instructs.

"How?" Mithra asks.

"Ow" Mithra howls in pain when he stamps her foot with his when he tries to change the gear.

"Move your legs" he chides again.

"Why are you so grumpy?" Mithra asks feeling hurt and upset.

"Um... Sorry, baby" Karthik kisses her head.

"Apology accepted" Mithra smiles.

"Shall we go little faster? The road is free?"

"Okay" Karthik agrees & twist his wrist along with Mithra's to increase the speed.

"Baby, I am gonna take my hands now and let you drive on your own. Just keep your hands steady and hold the handle bar firmly, okay?" Karthik tells.

"No. No. I am scared. You keep holding the handlebar with me" Mithra tells worriedly.

"Baby, how you will learn to drive if I kept on controlling the bike?"

"No, Karthik, I am scared of committing an accident."

"Nothing will happen. If you go off track I will handle it. C'mon, it's easy. Just like bicycle." he says & slowly releases his hold from the handlebar.

"No need to grip the handlebar too hard, just easy, okay?" Karthik tells. She nods fully focusing on the road ahead.

"You are doing good, baby." he says & encircles his hands around her waist making her gasp softly. Her loose hair wildly fans against Karthik's face. He nuzzles his nose in her hair & inhales the sweet scent which drives him crazy.

"I love this, Karthik?"

"What?"

"Riding bike at night" Mithra tells.

"I told you to slow down & change the gear when speed breaker comes right?" he asks when she forgot to slow down on the speed breaker resulting in Karthik scooting forward and flushing against Mithra's petite body.

"Okay" Mithra says. "You remember Karthik? You only taught me bicycling, then car driving & now bike."

"If you let me I will teach you much more." No need for Tara's oral sex education at all!

"What else will you teach me?" Mithra asks excitedly.

"Anything you wish to learn" I will teach you how to make love and how to make babies!

"Why you kissed me, Mithra?" Karthik asks her in a husky voice near her ears.

"Uh-huh... I ... actually, when the other couple kissed, I got tempted & wanna experience the feel... you know... the setup... was also so romantic & in an impulse I kissed you." she stammers. "You know Tara corrupted my head with all sorts of kisses & I thought... why not try... umm... I mean..." she really wants to say she kissed him because she wanted to show her love for him but she couldn't pluck the courage yet to openly declare her love to him.

She feels him removing his hands from her waist & moving little back from her as he went silent.

"Karthik?" she calls him. "Are you listening?"

"Yeah, very well... you basically practiced a kiss with me so that you can expertise in kissing and impress your boyfriend right?"

"Uhm...huh... no..." she tilts her head back to look at his face but he orders her to keep her head straight and focusing on riding.

"Why you kissed me back?" she asks him.

"Well, you made a sudden assault on me & was struggling like a deer caught in head light not knowing how to take forward the kiss so I gave you the lead. You know, I just helped you in your kissing practice." he says nonchalantly hiding his pain and disappointment. She is still the same confusing soul. She can't even give me a proper reason for kissing me. Fuck! Now, I feel so used!

Soon they reached their apartment. Karthik lets Mithra to get down first & then he parks the bike & walks silently with her to the elevator.

"Karthik, um... I... that kiss..." Mithra starts again on that topic to explain clearly to him why she kissed him.

"Forget about the kiss. Mithra. That was a mistake, okay?" He says leaning his back on the elevator metal wall and looking above, with his arms crossed over his chest. She stands silently gaping at him.

"You have the apartment key?" Karthik asks.

"No" she whispers.

"I thought we could let ourselves in without disturbing them" he tells & takes his hand to press the calling switch.

"No, knock the door, if you ring the door bell everyone will wake up" Mithra tells. Karthik nods & knocks the door. No one responds. Karthik knocks again little louder & suddenly Sanjeev opens the door but without noticing that Karthik knocks hard right on Sanjeev's forehead.

"F**k" Sanjeev splutters.

"Don't you have eyes?" Sanjeev asks angrily.

Karthik glares at him before barking him to move aside. Sanjeev shakes his head guessing something is wrong with him. Mithra obliviously laughs at Sanjeev for knocking on his forehead.

"Very funny" Sanjeev chides & hit her head with his knuckles making her cry.

Karthik walks straight to the refrigerator & pulls out a beer bottle. Credits to Sanjeev for bring beer bottles for Mithra's birthday party.

"You want one?" Karthik asks Sanjeev ignoring Mithra.

"Sure, dude" Sanjeev smiles & grabs one chilled bottle from him.

"You okay?" Sanjeev asks Karthik as they both settled on the living room couch.

"Oh yeah, I am grand" Karthik says & takes a huge slug from the bottle.

"Karthik, you are drinking on my birthday" Mithra reminds him. She hates him drinking, that too on her birthday.

"You want some?" Karthik holds out the bottle for her. Mithra shakes her head in negation.

"Stop drinking, Karthik" Mithra pleads him.

"Stop worrying for me, baby. You are not my wife to care for me. You are just a friend. See Sanjeev is also my friend and how nicely he is giving company to me unlike you" Karthik tells patting Sanjeev's shoulders. Mithra's nose flare with anger when he said she was just a friend to him.

"Go sleep, baby" Karthik tells.

"I won't" Mithra tells & sitting on the floor she starts unwrapping her birthday presents one by one.

"Hey, see my gift first" Sanjeev insists. Karthik looks at Sanjeev suspiciously seeing his over enthusiasm. Mithra nods & opens his gift excitedly. Her eyes went wide and her mouth drops down to the floor seeing his gift.

"F**k!!" Karthik spats at Sanjeev.

"What the hell is this?" Mithra asks holding up his precious gift between her thumb and index finger.

"Gift" Sanjeev shrugs.

"That I know." Mithra snaps.

"You will give that as a gift to a girl?" Karthik shouts at him.

"I can't give that gift to a guy, Karthik" he says matter of fact.

"How dare you?" Mithra shouts.

"What?" Sanjeev jumps back on the couch worrying she will rip off his neck.

"Do I look that fat for you to get me 42 sizes Bra? Mine is just 32, you idiot!" Mithra yells at him, dangling a baby pink lazy bra in the air. Karthik closes his eyes mortified.

"This idiotic girl is not shouting at him for getting a pair of bras but for getting the wrong size & without any shame she is openly saying her bra size to him. What I am going to do with her? Oh dear lord please help me"

"Oh I am sorry. I have the bill, I can change it & get the right size bras for you" Sanjeev says disappointed at himself of getting her a wrong sized one.

"No thanks. Go give these big bras to your grandmother" Mithra says & throws the bras at him.

"I don't think my grandma wears bra at the age of 80" Sanjeev wonders holding the strap of the bra. Karthik snatches it from him & throws it away.

"No need to get new one for her & never give any such shitty gift to any one, you idiot" Karthik snarls at him angrily.

"That was not a shitty gift" Mithra jumps in for Sanjeev's defense.

"You just go to your room & sleep" Karthik warns her.

"I want to see all the other gifts, Karthik?" She whines.

"This is panties, this is stockings, this is swim suit, this is rat shit & that's Bullshit. I told you what's in all the gift boxes. Now go to your room" Karthik shouts making her jump a step back & she starts trembling from head to toe.

"Karthik, calm down. Just for fun I gave her that gift. Hey, that's my actual gift for you." he points to a silver wrapped box. "It's a novel. I know you will love it because you are a bookworm" Sanjeev says. Mithra remains silent with her head bowed down.

"Mithra... come here" Karthik calls her gently. She shakes her head & bites her low lips hardly till it hurts her, to stop her sob.

"Mithra... baby... I am sorry; I didn't mean to shout at you" Karthik takes a step towards her but she runs to his room, crying.

"Oh God! I made my baby brat cry on her birthday" He groans.

"Chill, dude. As you know she won't take anything to heart. She will come around by tomorrow... I mean today morning." Sanjeev says coolly. Karthik glares at him murderously for giving her that f**king gift & riling up his anger.

"Okay, I get the look. I will shut my mouth & move my ass to where my darling Deeps is sleeping"

"Got to hell" Karthik shouts & Sanjeev runs to the guest room as if his behind was set on fire.

"Hey, stop crying. I said I am sorry, I won't shout at you, ever" Karthik says sitting beside her on the bed, rubbing her head gently.

"Look baby, that's not something to openly dangle in the air and show it to another man and also tell your bra size"

"But I tell you everything. You know my size right?"

"Of course I do. 32", 28", 34" right?" he asks. She nods. "But tell me? Sanjeev & I are one and the same to you?" Karthik asks.

"No" Mithra shakes her realizing her stupidity. "I'm sorry"

"It's okay"

"You know what? You are over possessive of me" Mithra remarks

"You have no idea how possessive I am, baby" he chuckles.

"Why you drank on my birthday, Karthik? You know I don't like you drinking right?" Mithra asks in a hurtful tone.

"It was just beer. I was really tired so... I'm sorry, I won't drink ever on your birthday" Karthik promises.

"Being your friend I can still care for you, Karthik. There is no written rule that only your wife should care for you" she tells softly looking down at her lap.

"Yes." he agrees.

"I liked when you shouted at me. It was a novelty" she tells him smiling.

"Then why you were crying?" Karthik asks.

"I was little scared, you have never shouted at me so..."

"I just don't know what came in me... I lost my temper." he says & she yawns.

"You are tired. You better sleep now, here in bed. I will sleep on the couch"

"Um... it's okay. We can share one bed" Mithra tells hesitantly.

"I have few mails to check & then I will suit myself on the couch. You don't bother." Karthik tells & plants 'good night' kiss on her forehead making her smile as she remembers Tara's wise words "a loving husband with never forget to give his wife a goodnight kiss on her forehead"

"Good night, Karthik" Mithra smiles.

"Good night, baby. Happy birthday once again" He smiles back.

--0--

"Hey" Mithra walks out of the room rubbing her sleepy eyes.

"Good morning, baby" Karthik greets her morning before taking a sip of his coffee.

"Where are our friends?"

"Gone"

"Oh. You did breakfast?" Mithra asks. Karthik nods.

"You had?"

"No, waiting for you." Karthik tells & gestures her to take a seat beside him & she obliges.

"After breakfast, get ready soon. I'll drop you at your house & then I'll go to mine."

"No. I will come with you to your house first. I want to get blessings from aunty & uncle"

"Okay" Karthik nods.

"Karthik... Can I ask you something?"

"Sure" he nods.

"You said in the beach that you were gonna talk something important to your parents... May I know what's it??" She asks softly.

"Um... I..." He hesitates. Then they hear his phone buzzing on the breakfast table.

"Mom!" Karthik answers picking up the phone in his hand and placing it over his left side ear.

"Mom... Please... I am coming... I will be there in 10 minutes... Love you" he says & hangs up. "Mithra, we will talk later. I am in a hurry. Mom is really pissed at me for not coming home last night to meet her"

"Sorry... Because of me, you had to stay the night with me"

"No. It's fine. Just eat your breakfast quickly & come down. I will get the car ready"

"Car? Sanjeev took his car right?"

"Tara left her car for us as Sanjeev dropped her home on his way. She will take back her car when she comes to your party this evening"

"Oh okay. I will come with you."

"No. Eat your breakfast first" he orders pointing to the plate sitting on the dining table in front of Mithra.

"I am not hungry. Thanks"

"Okay come." Karthik sighs & takes her hand.

--0--

"Mithra baby, happy birthday" Karthik's dad Mohan hugs Mithra.

"Thank you, uncle" Mithra smiles & takes his blessings.

"Your dad is mad at you for not giving him the chance to wish you at sharp 12am." Mohan laughs.

"I know he will forgive me" She tells grinning "But trust me uncle I had a great time with Karthik & our friends in the apartment"

"Glad you enjoyed last night"

"Dad, I guess you totally forgot me standing here" Karthik says folding his arms over his chest and shaking his head.

"When you forget me & your mom why should I acknowledge your presence my son?" Mohan asks faking anger.

"Dad. I... I didn't forget you and mom..."

"Just kidding. Go see your mom first. She is dying to meet you."

"Where is she?"

"Upstairs. In her room"

"Okay. Mithra, you talk with dad. I will see mom & come"

"Okay, Karthik"

Then Karthik runs upstairs taking two steps at a time so that he can see his sweet mom sooner.

"Mom" Karthik shouts & runs into her room & hugs her. "I missed you so much" Karthik whispers.

"Karthik" Radha sobs hugging her son tightly.

"Mom... You don't look fine... you look so weak. You have lost weight. What's wrong, mom? Aren't you taking care of your health?" Karthik asks holding his mom at arm's length as he scanned her body from head to toe.

"I don't have 10 children to look after me. I have only one but he is also not with me. He is staying for away from me & suffering all alone. Why are you doing this to yourself, Karthik?" Radha asks caressing her son's cheeks. "If you are still mad at us for getting you married forcefully then give us the punishment we deserve but why are you punishing yourself? Karthik, please don't distance yourself from your mom. I can't bear it. Let me in... Let me in baby... Let momma help you. You don't need your momma anymore?" Radha cries placing her head on Karthik's chest.

"Mom... Please. I do need you & dad. I am not punishing you or dad. I am just finding some space for myself. I will be back to you, mom. Real soon I will be back to you." Karthik wraps his hands around his mother's shoulders and caresses her head.

"How long, Karthik?" Radha asks, her tearful eyes full of hope and longing.

"Mom, I pleaded you & dad to come to Singapore with me but you both refused to"

"We will come to Singapore..." Karthik smiles hearing that but his smile drops hearing the next sentence."... but get married, Karthik"

"Mom! You can't bargain in my life" He says & takes a step back releasing her from his hold. "I can't. I can't get married. I am not ready for marriage. I don't know will I ever be ready for that. I don't want that. Please, don't force me"

"Karthik... I am not forcing you. Once your dad and I did that mistake, without caring for our son, we forced you into a marriage you never wanted & pushed you to this stage... So we won't repeat the same mistake again. Now, I am just pleading you... Please, find a nice girl and discover your love in her." She joins her hands together as if worshipping. "Every mother wants their child to be happy so I do. I want to see you happy..."

"Mom... Don't push me to a helpless situation by getting all emotional. I am happy. Trust me, please"

"Don't try to fool your mother. You can't lie to me. Your eyes say everything clearly. How much pain you will carry in your fragile heart?" Radha shouts.

"Radha... Why are you shouting? If he isn't ready for marriage then leave him alone, don't force him... We did that mistake once. Let's not do it again and lose our son once and for all."

"Karthik... I heard everything... I want to..." Mithra starts.

She overheard their entire heated yet emotional conversation. She felt terrible for not realizing the pain she had inflicted on her Karthik by divorcing him. Her one wrong decision not only affected him but also his parents. Even she got hurt with her own decision because she lost her Karthik. Wait! I didn't lose my Karthik yet. I won't lose him. I will win him back. I will ask him to forgive me this moment and I will also ask him to take me back in his life.

"Mithra... You leave... Please" Karthik tells not even looking at her.

"Karthik, answer me? Will you forget everything like a dream & start a new life?" Radha asks eying Mithra through the corner of her eyes.

Karthik looks at his mom helplessly. "Please don't do this to me, mom. Please"

"Karthik... Listen to me once. Please. I am sorry... I... I want to tell..." Mithra pleads as she cries.

"Mithra you just leave the hell out of here" He says gritting his teeth. His heart bleeds seeing his mother in pain and in tears. "Oh God! I am so blinded by my love to see my parents' pain. I hate myself for not thinking about my parents' happiness once."

"Karthik... Please..." Mithra begs for a chance as tears stream down her cheeks uncontrollably. He doesn't hear her words of pleading as his mind failed to process anything.

"Aunty... Please tell Karthik to talk to me once... Please" Mithra begs shaking Radha's hand.

"Karthik... " Radha caress Karthik's cheek. "Sorry... I lost my control. It just hurts me to see you like this. I am sorry I won't force you in anything you don't want to do..."

"I will get married, mom. Choose any girl of your choice for me. I will accept her as my wife" Karthik promises knowing this is the only way to make his parents' happy & then he walks out of the room. Mithra stares at his retreating form in utter shock. She feels like someone has pulled the rug beneath her feet.

... To be continued!!!

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