"Life"?

In each person's concept, these two words have different meanings. For many people, what they call 'life' is always filled with joy and a little sadness, love and happiness are the things that always come to them. Some considers it an empty, undefined space, a Prison that keeps themselves inside. Or someone who was cruelly treated by that 'life' as hell on earth, it made them slowly become desperate, suffering and losing self-control, so what was the result? They decided to end that 'life' as well as accepting to give up all behind to end the wounds that are always gnawing in their minds.

So what about  a cursed girl's life?

Many people think that she's really happy because she always lives in glory and no one dares to touch her, they all think that her 'life' is always full of laughter and love, considering her coldness is  just a playful joke. But , little do they know, that the 'joy' that anyone has got, the 'warm love', 'happiness' that all  of them have is what she has never been through or experienced once.

Yet, it actually has come for her but never been completely enough, and only appeared for a short time in her life then disappeared again and left no trace, no different from a ray lightning in the sky. 

What about those who get jealous of her life? It's Just So Ridiculous! They don't even know what she has gone through and what she has lost!

More precisely, even if she tries to hide her feelings deep inside and says she's fine, she knows she still can't get rid of the fact that the pains are still coming for her like scars can't be faded, they all pierce deep into her heart and soul like sharp blades that she could never draw, tool her control away completely and made her silently let herself sink into a mess, an indefinite, empty and desperate space.

"Everything will be fine soon, my child."

That's all what her uncle - the only relatives of hers now - says when he saw her sad.

She also comforted herself like that...

But, unfortunately, unlike what he said, she knew it, that as she continued to walk on the path of her life - a path of death, full of desolation and lack of love from the others, that means she will have to endure many more harsh times,  pains and suffering, they will never dissipate.

Rather, the 'hapiness' thing for her is just like a white lie, no different from the sharp knives that always wanted to stab he and making her unable to enjoy the short 'life' despite her appearance in this world is just like a deciduos' life.

Indeed, she doesn't feel anything, can't feel the so-called 'love' from people around her whether it's true or not, can't feel anything out there, because the darkness has obscured her vision of the outside world. She has really lost all the faith in everything, always feeling afraid of other people's love but never showed it outside.

"Can't believe in anyone completely."

That's all what she always has in her mind.

The first page of her life, is from here...