With the slightest of creaks, I slowly opened the door. I was greeted with the hum of the ship's engine echoing down a dark hall.

I tensed as I transformed again, readying a small ice knife in one hand after I did. There was no way or reason I'd risk missing with individual shards, and the large shard I'd used to break free was too impractical to use for me. I gave the fading lamp a considering look before closing the door. Again, there was no reason for me to risk anything, this time with being spotted.

Putting one hand on the wall as a guide, I proceeded down the hall. Small creaks and groans in the wood sounded around me along with an occasional fluttering sort of noise outside the ship's hull (maybe bird Pokémon?). They combined with the hum, creating a sound that put my nerves on edge.

My hand soon felt the lip of a corner, and a quick investigation revealed it was a narrow, steep staircase. Up the stairs I went to another hallway where the engine grew quieter. This one way narrower with what I was sure were a couple doors lining it. My hand passed over a door frame as I walked this next hall, though the attached door was closed. While I was tempted to listen at it, I pushed the thought away and continued on.

One last staircase, which I tried to hurry up. Instead of another hall, there was a closed door that barred my way. It, too, was unlocked.

The cool night air hit me in the face when I cracked open the door, fresh and uplifting. I took in a lungful, reveling in it after being cooped up with the stale below-deck air for the past few hours. A flock of Fletchinder flew through the faintly pink-streaked the sky above. I spotted the place where the ship's gangplank would go down, and I decided to just run for it.

"Where do you think you're going, Lotario?"

I had no time to react before a hand grabbed my wrist, pulling me to a stop. I cried out and whirled around, trying to yank myself free. There, of course, stood Rangi. I somehow hadn't heard him come up behind me on the stairs. But there he was, looking disappointed.

"You can't deny your fate," he said.

   My first instinct was to plunge the ice knife into Rangi's hand, so that was what I did. Rangi jerked his hand back, and the knife missed. But he had let go, and the moment he did so, I tried to run. I wasn't able to make it more than a few steps before Rangi cut me off.

"Lotario, I suggest you stop right there," he said.

"Shut up!" I flung a handful of Ice Shards at him, and his eyes widened as he threw his arm up and tried to sidestep them. Two skidded across his arm, and the rest missed.

Rangi ran a finger across one of the scratches my shards inflicted, grimacing. "So you'd raise a hand to your older brother?" he asked, unsheathing Justice. "I suppose we'll be doing this the hard way. Bellum."

The amber patterns pulsed with light before the metal of Justice reacted, stretching and warping until the flat was twice as wide and the length had roughly doubled. The sword was now over half my height and seemed to radiate an energy that made me flinch.

"We don't have to do this. Either give up now, or I'll force you to. You don't want me to hurt you, do you?" he said, easily raising Justice like its weight hadn't changed in the slightest.

"Like you haven't already," I spat. I wasn't just speaking of the pain in my head, but also my heart. I was still saddened that he'd turned on me like this. Some small part of me bore that sick pity for him, which begged me not to hurt or kill him. I couldn't help but stubbornly uphold my resolve to not kill. But my mindset from my days on the streets resurfaced here; I would hurt him if I had to. I wasn't going to let him take me.

Rangi's eyes narrowed. "Very well. I'll try not to hurt you too badly." Brandishing Justice at his side, Rangi swung at me.

I couldn't help but gasp as I made myself fall to the deck to avoid the arc of the elongated blade. I abandoned my knife for two handfuls of Ice Shards, which I promptly hurled at Rangi's legs. Most of the shards hit home, and he gasped as his left leg buckled.

I both loved and hated how good of a shot I'd become.

As Rangi fell, I blindly crawled away from him, just trying to distance myself. I then had some common sense to look up, and I skidded to a halt. Luckily, I stopped before I heatbutted the mast. Another head injury was something I didn't need right now.

"This is pointless, Lotario," Rangi called, and I looked over to where I'd left him. He pulled a shard from his shin and threw it to the deck. Red glittered on icy white in the moonlight.

"That's fine by me!" I replied. "When I'll die is the one thing I'd rather not know." I threw another round of shards.

Rangi raised Justice over his face, and the shards shattered against the blade. "That sounds like a veritable hell to me," he said, standing up. His face was twisted in a surprising amount of pain. I knew my shards hurt, but not that much. "Don't you want to be happy? If you stay, you'll be resigning yourself to that life of ignorance and unhappiness you so hated."

"I can't be happy like that. That's a fact," I said. "And at least I won't be in complete ignorance. I know the truth now."

Rangi frowned, lowering Justice. "Are you sure you know the truth?"

Doubt was quick and fleeting, but I forced it aside. I wasn't going to be deceived by him again. I gritted my teeth. "I'm positive."

Rangi came at me again, circling around to intercept me if I were to run for the gangplank. Round after round of Ice Shards soared at him, but even with an injured leg his movements were both precise and unpredictable. Before I knew it, he was bringing Justice around towards the hand I still had raised. I pulled away, though not before the blade sliced open the back of my hand.

I glimpsed the gash before I felt it, and it was like someone had set fire to it. I wanted to cry out, but Justice was already coming down in a diagonal slash. I back-stepped to avoid the strike and tossed off the remainder of the shards I had on my other hand. I wasn't quick enough, and the shards were straight-up slashed in half.

"Stop it!" Rangi hissed.

I responded by burying a new round of shards in his arm. This time his shout was audible, and my stomach twisted at the odd sense of satisfaction it brought me. Another slash came, and I stumbled back again. My back hit the railing of the deck, saving me from toppling over the edge but not from Justice's wrath.

The tip of the blade scored across my chest from one collarbone to the next, and the wound instantly seemed to set itself aflame as horrible pain burned into my skin. My scream was interrupted when Rangi's hand ensnared my throat, just above where my icicles has sprouted.

I didn't even have time to try and gouge at his arm to free myself, as he acted with frightening speed. Flinging his other hand up, he skillfully flipped Justice around. And with one sharp jab, he drove the pommel straight into my gut.

An animalistic sound left me as the breath was driven from me. It was like I'd been hit with a Mach Punch. Any composure and willpower I'd been trying to keep up was destroyed, and with a shudder I ungracefully vomited onto mine and Rangi's boots. I could hear him stifling a gag himself, and with a forceful yank he threw me to the side where I tumbled to the deck again. Icicles snapped as I landed, tearing new pain into me.

I lay collapsed amongst fragments of shattered ice, clutching my stomach as I coughed and retched, unable to bring myself to move. I couldn't believe how quickly I'd been subdued. At the same time, however, what did I really expect? Even if I hadn't been bashed over the head, there was only so much I could do against a well-trained fighter like Rangi.

"Now do you understand? It was pointless to try and fight me," he said.

Any words I wanted to speak were lost in the gags that unwillingly left me. It was like everything inside me was rebelling all at once, and the world seemed to blur and turn itself upside down in my vision. Part of me wanted to give up and surrender, just so it would hopefully stop. But I couldn't, not when Rangi was standing right over me. I raised a trembling hand to him.

"Gl-Glac—" I coughed, unable to gather up enough breath to finish the spell.

Rangi looked truly angered now as he saw me do this. "Just stop it, Lotario," he warned.

"Glacies Testa!" I choked. The shards began to take form.

Something flashed across Rangi's face as his eyes widened and he flinched back. Fear. "Don't touch me with that ice again!" he cried as Justice came arcing towards my hand. I tried to yank it away, but I was just a bit too slow.

For a moment I didn't feel anything, even though I saw the carnage right before me. This had to be some sort of lie, surely. It couldn't be true, because I couldn't believe what my eyes were showing me. My fingers truly couldn't have been gone.

But then I felt it, and I screamed.

Reflexively, I clutched my hand to my chest, but I wailed again when the fabric of my shirt scraped against the stumps of my fingers. I tried to curl what remained of them into a fist, only to stop when the pain prevented me from even moving them. It was like my hand had been set on fire, though it was so much worse.

For a moment, I gave in. I curled into a ball, not bothering to fight the welling tears and cries that continued to escape me. My mind was blank, only able to process that I was in agony. It took all I had to not black out right then and there. I surely looked like a wounded Pokémon, helpless to my hunter who could end me with a single stab. And as I laid there, a sobbing, choking, drooling mess, I almost wished that he would.

Meanwhile, Rangi stood over me, staring down. His face was blank except for his widening eyes, which held something I couldn't identify through my tears. He brought a hand to his mouth, which clenched into a knuckle-whitening fist. "Y-you're fortunate that I only got your fingers," he muttered. "Now please surrender, Lotario. P-please. I don't want to hurt you any more."

While the world pulsed before me in dark hues, I could still see the glittering brightness of the ice knife that I'd abandoned laying nearby, just out of my reach. I forced myself to focus on it. While it'd be violent, it was my once chance to end this. And I'd sadly resigned myself to violence.

"N-never, you bastard!" I made a desperate grab for the knife, a last burst of adrenaline numbing the pain and spurring me forwards, and my fingers successfully closed around it. Instead of stopping me, Rangi actually tried to move away. I then pushed myself up and lashed out at him.

This time, it was his reflexes that proved to be too slow.

There was no resistance as the jagged shard plunged into Rangi's gut, none at all. It was like applying excess force to slice a cake. The shard buried itself deep enough that my fist was pressed against his tunic.

Rangi let out a small choke of surprise as I let go and fell to my hands and knees. He put a trembling hand to his stomach, fingers scraping the end of the four inch-long Ice Shard. The pain seemed to register then as his face screwed up. He doubled over, hardly able to stifle a scream. "S-so you... I've..." he muttered numbly. He looked up at me. "I-I should have expected this..."

"What else could've happened?" I said, shaking. "And we could've avoided this! You just had to leave me alone."

"I simply can't do that," Rangi said. "I'd just be letting another monster run free. A-and this proves it, doesn't it? That you're a monster. You're willing to injure and maim, all for extending an existence that might be ended the next day."

My shoulders tensed as I winced. He was right, and yet he wasn't. "I... never said I wasn't," I said grimly, sitting back onto my knees. "But why does me wanting to live warrant me being one?"

Rangi gave me the response I expected. "I could ask the same of you. Why does me wanting to bring some semblance of justice to this world warrant me being one?"

"Because..." I could've said the obvious. "Because we've done nothing wrong." And yeah, some magicians hadn't had to do anything wrong. But like Rangi said, plenty of us had to. I'd never forgotten what I did to Dahlia and Fleet. While what they did was wrong, what I'd done wasn't exactly right either. "Because in our minds, we're justified. What either of us have done isn't right. We're both monsters."

"E-exactly. That is why I'm doing this," Rangi said. "I'm atoning for the sins that us monsters have committed, that we've all committed."

I frowned. "'We've all committed'? I thought you said you only went after magicians," I said cautiously. Somehow, I felt more contempt than I already had. I knew it. He'd already killed Father, so there was no reason why he wouldn't kill those who supported magicians.

To my surprise, the corners of Rangi's mouth lifted into the grimmest of smiles. "And I do only pursue magicians," he said. "Father had been an exception, and Guella would have been as well. After all, you have to dig away the dirt to get to the root of the problem."

I froze. "Then why..." My eyes slowly widened as the realization dawned on me, and my heart sank in horror.

Rangi seemed to know what I was thinking, and he did nothing to refute it. "Sadly, I have another lie that I've been telling you," he said. "But not just to you, to everyone that I've met, for over a decade. You've seemed to figure it out, so... I might as well unveil it, for you."

Then before my eyes, Rangi began to change. Thin stems sprouted from his scalp, and his skin began to lighten, adopting a distinct green tinge. I stared on in shock as leaves sprouted and petals bloomed, which were silvered in the remaining moonlight. Long petals of marigold soon overtook the dark brown strands of his hair, and a vibrant shade of green tinted his skin. He was barely able to straighten back up using Justice as a crutch. A woven cloak of leaves fluttered behind him as he did so.

Rangi... was a Grass magician.

"D-don't worry. I can hardly use a single spell," he said sagely. "I've purposefully never had a competent grasp on my magic. This, I can truthfully say."

I felt like I'd been stabbed then as well, except the pain came from the inside. This lie hurt far more than the others. I clenched my good hand into a fist, confusion and anger welling up in me. "Then why do this?" I demanded. "You know how horrible things are for us!"

"I already told you," Rangi said. "Every day, I heard how abhorrent magicians are. Thieves, murderers, tyrants." He took a slow, shaking breath. "Imagine my shock when I discovered that I was one myself. I didn't know that I was a magician for years. I thought it was some cruel coincidence when I first found out."

That surprised me. How could he have not known? "Nobody told you?" I questioned skeptically, ready to dismiss what he said as more lies.

He shook his head. "My mother never told me that she came from a lineage of Grass magicians. I found out a few weeks after she was murdered, purely by accident." A nervous laugh left him as he ran a bloodied hand through his petals. "One minute I was crying because my heart was hurting, and the next it was because that pain was spreading throughout my entire body. I had no idea what was happening, I-I thought I was dying!"

The panic in his voice was painfully real, and I could almost feel that twinge of pity for him again. All that emotional distress must have triggered that initial transformation.

"Then the next thing I knew, I looked like this..." He twisted his petals in a way that must've been painful. "I-I was horrified. I refused to come out of my room for days afterwards. Father thought I was still grieving, but I was just terrified of what I was. I didn't dare come out again until I figured out how to control my transformations, and even then I didn't want to leave the house because I was afraid that I would transform in public. If somebody saw, if a guard saw..." he trailed off.

"I felt the same way when I rediscovered my magic," I said cautiously. "I was afraid of myself, that I thought I was something horrible."

"Then you must understand. Our existence isn't right," he said. "I've tried to rebuke this, pretend I was a normie and try to live one's life. But you can't forget what's a part of you. I can't forget that I can turn into this... this abomination."

With a rough yank, he ripped off some of his petals. He stared at them in his hand, looking utterly disgusted.

"I also can't ignore the dread that consumes me whenever I'm around what I naturally fear." He tossed the petals to the wind, where they drifted down into the never-ending sky. "Fire, Poison, Flying, Ice..."

   "We all have fears, regardless of whether we're magicians or not," I said.

   "They aren't normal ones. Like being uncomfortable around your partner Pokémon as if you were strangers, even if you had known her for years." Rangi's shoulders started to shake. "Like wanting to hold your baby brother, but you can't bring yourself to for months because you're afraid of him, even if he has no concept of what it means to inflict pain. N-no normal person should be frightened of such things."

   "That doesn't mean you're a monster," I still tried to object.

"But I am, it's in my nature. And as one, I felt that I had to make up for this. I thought I'd embrace what I am but try to save other people from us."

I shook my head. "You didn't have to, you just chose to."

"There was no choosing," Rangi said. "I already was one. We all are."

He was still wrong. "The Noseks chose," I said. "They could've not helped me, left me to die in the snow."

"Of course they would help one of their kind. It's only instinct."

"They didn't know that!" I exclaimed. "They only found out I was a magician hours later, and even then they weren't sure for days until I confirmed it. What monsters would help sick and dying children?"

"Ones that had something to gain," Rangi immediately answered.

That couldn't have been farther from the truth. "What did they have to gain from letting me live?" I asked. "I still didn't trust them at first, and they offered for me to live with them. I only started working for them when I insisted that I repay them, and even then they paid me! They did all of that out of the kindness of their hearts.

   "And my friend Kari also chose." My voice trembled. "H-he wasn't as clear-conscience as the Noseks, yeah. He stole, he hurt people, but he was selfless. He only hurt someone once, and that was to help another person. That was all he wanted to do—help and heal. He could've hurt more, killed even, but he chose not to. He tried to be a good person."

"The normies don't see it as that!" Rangi snapped. "They're right to see us as what we are."

The anger swelled in me again. "You say that like they're above us! What makes you think that they haven't done anything wrong? Those hunters nearly killed you."

"They had a reason to: they were hunting magicians."

"They weren't hunting you. To them, you were just a normal person. If they're not monsters, then why'd they try to kill you and gloat about it?"

Rangi paused at that. "I don't—I was in their way."

I was beyond flabbergasted. How could he stand to defend these people? "In their way? Of what, murdering innocent people? Those magician children had done nothing to you or those hunters, and their grandfather went out of his way to make you Justice because he was so grateful! And you still went and turned him in while letting those hunters go!"

"You say that like they're monsters," Rangi said, looking hesitant.

"Yes, because that's what they are!" I replied.

Rangi's eyes narrowed. "While that may be, not all normies are horrible."

I wanted to scream. How could he be this dense? Had he really disillusioned himself that much? "Are you even listening to yourself right now?" I asked. "Magicians try to do good, and it doesn't matter. Normies can do whatever the hell they want, and it's fine. Why does the few get to excuse the majority with them?"

   "Because it has to!" Rangi snapped. "The law states that—"

   "Forget the law! Take away the law, and what do their actions make them? Monsters. But that doesn't excuse our actions either, the actions we chose," I stated. "We're all monsters, we all have the possibility of being them!" My face fell. "Whether or not we express those capabilities is what makes us monsters. You chose to be one. I chose to be one." I hadn't even realized that until I said it, and it stunned me as much as it did Rangi.

He opened his mouth to respond, but he didn't say a thing. He then lowered his head. I couldn't tell if it was from the pain, or because he couldn't look me in the eye. "But I..." he trailed off. A cough then wracked him. Dark particles sprayed from his mouth, and I could see a trickle of blood beginning to leak from the corner of his mouth.

My anger briefly fractured. "Rangi!" I gasped before I could stop myself. He didn't seem to notice, however.

"No, no, it doesn't make sense..." He continued to shake his head as he spoke. "Dammit, it doesn't... it doesn't, and yet it does. I-I thought... But... All this—" He was hardly making sense now. "Perhaps you're r-right?"

He sounded so uncertain then. But just the fact that he even seemed to consider it was enough to quell my anger and make room for uncertainty of my own.

"Just try to think about it. What is right here? Do you really want to do this?" I asked. Rangi didn't respond, and I was worried about what he'd do. Then he spoke again.

"Do I really want to do this?" he said. I kept my mouth shut. "Wh-what I want... But it isn't... right." He struggled to speak through breaths that became increasingly strained. He finally looked back up, and I was taken aback by the look of sheer horror on his face. His eyes were wide, pupils constructed to near pinpricks as he trembled. He looked as if he was about to be sick. "No, I-I don't want to do this, I never wanted to..!"

I honestly became afraid of him once again. I tried to move away from him, and as I did, the world lurched sickeningly. I hadn't even noticed how unstable I'd become in the past few minutes. Blearily, I saw just how reddened my shirt was since I tried to staunch the bleeding from my hand against it.

"Lotario, st-stop," Rangi said, taking an unsteady step towards me.

I shook my head, refusing to take my eyes off him. "Don't come any closer."

"Che'lu, I-I can try to heal you," Rangi said.

That did make me stop, only out of confusion. "Why'd you call me brother? I thought you said you didn't care about me," I refuted, a bitter edge to my tone.

Rangi winced. "I know. But even though I said I didn't and I told myself I didn't... I always have. I loved showing you the stars and teaching you about them. I couldn't stand it when you were so unhappy. I-I truly wanted to heal you when your finger had been broken, but I was too afraid of myself and what might happen if we were spotted."

   "And you put the law over me?"

   "Yes! I had to!" Rangi cried. "I thought I could work around it, that perhaps having another week or two with you on Verelum would have been enough. But no, i-it wouldn't have, nothing would have." The look on my face was all he needed to know about what I thought of this. Still, he kept trying. "Whether you take that as a lie or not, I don't care. Just let me try."

"With what dirt?" I questioned, humoring him. "I know Grass magicians take nutrients from the soil for their healing."

"I-I've always kept some soil on my person... in case I couldn't access any," Rangi answered.

"Then heal yourself," I muttered.

Rangi shook his head. "I can't. I-I've only ever healed small bruises and scrapes." His hand clenched over his stab wound. "I know I can't heal you completely. But I don't want to heal myself, not when you need it more. I can at least try to do it." He looked at me pleadingly. "Didn't you say trying was all I could do?"

My uncertainty grew. "I don't—"

"Can this be the one good thing you think I've done for you? Please!" he exclaimed.

He looked sincere, so disgustingly earnest. And that didn't stop me from holding out my maimed hand like an idiot. Rangi carefully took it in both his hands, and I fully expected him to do something horrible. Twist it, break it, something. Instead, he spoke.

"Radix Salutem."

Roots sprouted from Rangi's body, thin and pitifully small compared to the roots I'd seen Kari conjure. They snaked into a small leather pouch he had attached to his belt. Whatever amount of soil in there was barely enough as tiny wavering bubbles of light traveled from it and along the roots.

The pulses of pain were small, but they quickly built up into a rapid-fire that I honestly couldn't take right now. I tore my bottom lip to shreds in an attempt to stifle my cries. By the time it was over, I was trembling uncontrollably, and I wanted to throw up again. When I dared to look at the damage, it seemed like the bleeding had stopped, nothing more.

Rangi straightened up and stumbled after that, his back colliding with the railing. "I know that doesn't redeem me, not in the slightest, but I-I still... feel good," he wheezed. He had to catch himself with both hands, which allowed me to see the small streams of blood that were leaking down his front and dripping onto the deck.

I gingerly wrapped my hand in what fabric of my shirt hadn't been stained, almost at a loss for words. But I had to say something, so I spoke the first ones that came to mind. "Thank you... che'lu," I said.

Rangi's face blanked as he looked on in shock. Then he smiled. Although it was the one he wore while he was still lying, it was different. And that difference changed its meaning altogether. This was the first smile I'd seen that I knew reached his eyes, as dull as they were becoming. I knew for a fact that it wasn't fake. He slowly tilted his head back as he gazed up at the fading stars.

"I-it's nearly dawn... Y-you can still s-see alofa tunoa," he noted, his voice shaking far more than before. "I-I suppose I can see... why you th-think it looks like my charm. I wish I'd s-seen it all sooner... for you..." The strength seemed to leave Rangi's body then, as his hands slipped and he began to fall backwards.

My heart staggered, and on instinct I dove for him, crying out his name. I desperately reached out for him. My fingers snagged something, though that thing snapped in an instant, and Rangi toppled off the side of the ship. There was no chance of me being able to stop this. His body plummeted like a stone into the cloud-less sky, trailing browning leaves and marigold petals in its wake. Before I knew it, he was gone.

I lost my grip on the railing and slid to the deck, heart pounding and my eyes wide. All that remained of Rangi's presence was a few stray petals, a puddle of his blood, and his Gracidea pendant, which I clutched in a death grip.

I didn't know how long I sat there, staring at the spot where Rangi last stood. Horrible dread lingered, though I knew it was just Justice. The sword still lay on the deck, looking almost lonely without a wielder. As if it could sense its abandonment, the glowing patterns on the bloodstained sword died, and the blade retracted to its usual size.

For some reason, I found myself reaching for the sword. I guess I just couldn't stand the thought of leaving it behind. After all, I had to leave. The leather-wrapped hilt was still warm when I grabbed it. Using it as a support, I forced myself to my feet.

Numbly, I began walking across the deck, even as I stumbled with nearly every step and fresh tears started dripping down my cheeks. No matter what, I had to get off this ship. Even if I had to crawl, I would.

Mere steps from reaching solid land, my legs gave out. Luckily I fell forwards, and I collapsed onto the cliffside, Justice clattering on the rocky soil beside me. Everything wavered before me, the darkness finally reaching forth to smother me.

I forced my head to turn to the side. My eyes searched the sky and spotted alofa tunoa, finally starting to fade with the coming light. One last thought drifted through my mind.

   If only Rangi had seen it all sooner...

—~*~—

I awoke to a small, cold nose nuzzling my cheek. I opened my eyes, squinting at the light that was seeping through the partially-opened curtains. But me waking up wasn't enough to stop Dew from poking and prodding me with both her nose and paws.

Wait, Dew?

The thick fog hazing my mind parted the moment I realized this. Dew let out a happy squeak. She was out the door before I could say anything, probably to tell whoever was around that I was awake.

I'd been able to open my eyes, but I could do little else then. The fog swimming through my head persisted even as I awoke fully, leaving me woozy. I was uncomfortably warm as well, though I didn't have the strength to move aside the blankets. I groaned as my temples thrummed with pressure and nausea turned my insides. Less than two minutes awake, and I already wanted to vomit. Off to a great start.

My fingers clenched, twisting the sheets in them. The sensation made my stomach flip. I knew the damage, so why did it feel like my fingers were still there?

I shakily brought my left hand out from under the sheets, and my breath hitched when I saw the stumps of my pinky, ring, and half of my middle fingers enwrapped in bandages. It didn't look right, and not because of the absence of my fingers. The bandages were too pristine and pretty compared to the horror I was staring at last night. Was it last night? I had no clue how long I'd been asleep for, so it could've been days ago for all I knew.

I held my hand to my chest, trying not to grimace. The stumps of my fingers were throbbing, but I was more focused on the pain stabbing me internally.

The door then creaked open, and I glanced up. I didn't completely expect to see who entered the room. It was Iga along with an Audino and the green-haired apothecary owner. Iga's presence confused me less, since it was probably Alan's turn at the store today. But the healer and the Audino... Then again, looking at my hand, it made more sense.

"Good morning, Loto. How are you feeling?" Iga asked.

I dared to try and shift my position so I could see them better, and my stomach rebuked the movement with a queasy lurch. I stifled another groan as I muttered, "Tired, and sick." It was hard to talk then, especially with bile beginning to rise in my throat. I gagged a moment later, and that caused some mild alarm. After being sick into a bucket fetched by the healer and managing to take a few sips of water, I settled back into bed, feeling only marginally better. I couldn't believe there'd still been something in me left to lose.

"You won't be feeling your best for a while," the healer said, giving me a sympathetic look as she pressed the back of her hand to my cheek. A bit of the heat was relieved a moment later when she placed a cool, damp cloth on my forehead. "Ignoring your magic exhaustion, you lost quite a bit of blood, and your injuries were developing an infection. You still have a fever because of it." Her Audino hummed in concurrence.

   "M-my hand still hurts," I whimpered.

   "I could put you back to sleep before I leave," she offered, looking concerned. "My Spore's the reason why you've been asleep for so long. You were in so much pain the first time you awoke that I had to put you back under."

   That was something I definitely didn't remember, and I was glad I couldn't. But I couldn't go back to sleep yet, I had to tell Iga what happened. "No thanks," I declined. "I-it's not that bad."

"Are you sure?" the healer asked. I nodded, and she reluctantly turned to Iga, "Now that he's awake, there isn't as much concern now. You have the medications I gave you as well as those Sleep Powder dosages if he has trouble sleeping. He still seems to be spent from magic overuse, so he needs to rest as much as possible. But if his fever goes back up or something else happens, let me know."

"Of course, thank you yet again," Iga said gratefully. After leaving the room to walk the healer to the front door, Iga returned, this time with Dew in tow. Dew leapt onto the bed and settled herself next to my face. I ran a finger over her fur, faintly smiling. I was relieved to see her again after... three days? That was what the healer had said it was...

Iga sat down on the bed, drawing my attention to her. "I don't like to admit when I'm afraid. But when Alan and I found you, Loto, I truly was afraid," she said grimly. "Just the amount of blood... We thought you were dead."

"W-well, I wasn't," I laughed weakly. "How did you find me? I can only remember passing out once I got off the ship."

"And that was where we found you. Well, Bard did. He tracked yours and Rangi's scents, and it was perhaps an hour after sunrise that we spotted you. I started to bring you back here while Alan searched the ship looking for Rangi. I'm sorry, but he couldn't find your brother. Do you have any idea of where he could have gone?"

Cold, sick guilt churned in me. "I do know." I looked at Iga, fully prepared to face the repercussions of what I'd done. "Off the side of the ship. I-I killed him."

Iga frowned as Dew's ears perked up, her whiskers twitching. "What do you mean?" Iga asked hesitantly.

"It's exactly that," I said. "I killed him. I stabbed him in the gut after he cut off my fingers, a-and he fell overboard..!" My voice cracked as I truly realized what I'd done. I didn't think I'd ever actually kill someone, and after I swore I never would. "I-I killed him." I started to break down, tears welling in my eyes. "I j-just—I stabbed him, and he..." I groaned in disgust for myself.

Iga calmly stroked my hair, and I did my best to not flinch. "Loto, calm down," she soothed. "I'm sure you didn't mean to do it."

I shook my head frantically. "I didn't! I-I swear I didn't! I th-thought he was gonna k-kill me!"

"Then what you did was justified," she said. "If you were afraid for your life, and he was the reason why, then you needed to defend yourself." I was sure she was just saying that for my sake. But it was impossible to calm me down now.

   "N-no, no!" I dissolved into nonsensical babbling, clutching my head as horror and sorrow overcame me once again. "I killed him, I-I killed him!" I gave up on talking and just bawled, Iga and Dew trying to unsuccessfully calm me all the while.

After far too long, I finished crying out all my tears. I was left with a raw, aching throat and reddened eyes. Iga gave me a sympathetic look as I hiccuped pathetically, wiping my eyes on the sheets. Any pride I had then was in shambles, but I didn't care one bit. "Would you like me to leave you alone, Loto?" she asked.

I shook my head again. "No. P-please stay. I have to tell you what happened," I muttered. I pushed myself up into a sitting position in spite of her protests. I just didn't want to be laying down for this.

And so I told her. The retelling came out jumbled and disorganized, some parts hazy because I couldn't remember them that well. Halfway through it became even harder to keep going because I started to choke up again. It went on for a long time.

"I can't believe he would turn on his own kind like that," Iga said afterwards, thoroughly repulsed. Dew seemed to be in agreement, as her fur was fluffed up and her whiskers sparked angrily.

"I-I don't think it was entirely his fault," I said. "Yeah, he could've not chosen to do that, but," I couldn't believe I was saying this, "I can almost see why he would. Constant fear of both yourself and those around you, pressure with no way out of it... A-at least the Far Plains offer some escape compared to Verelum." It wasn't like I forgave him or wasn't angry at his actions, it was just that I understood them.

Iga's frown deepened. "What he did was still horrible. And even if he did see the errors in his thoughts, he ended up paying the price for them." She tried to soften her look when she saw my somber expression. "You said he looked happy before he fell, so I suppose that was the best outcome. He could've died bitter and angry."

And he hadn't. He'd died regretting, and I found myself regretting what I'd done as well. "He could've not died at all," I said, leaning against Iga. She nodded and put her arm around my shoulder. Though the gesture was nice, it didn't make me feel better.

After a while in silence, Iga stood up, though her hand remained on my shoulder. "I know it'll be difficult, but you should try to get some rest," she said. "I've kept you awake for long enough. Are you sure you don't need any Sleep Powder?"

The exhaustion tugging at my mind said no while the pain and discomfort I felt everywhere else fiercely agreed. "I do want it," I muttered, laying back down. It was a relief to not be sitting up anymore. As Iga left, a question struck me. "W-wait, what did you tell Cyryl?"

Iga stopped. "Bandits," she replied plainly. She looked over her shoulder at me. "And it seems that's the story we'll be sticking by. Cyryl doesn't need to know about what truly happened, so don't tell them. Please."

Although I wanted to disagree, I understood. This was something Cyryl didn't need to know about. "I won't," I said. Iga gave me a small smile and left, leaving just me and Dew. I waited for my partner to chastise me for what I'd said, or at least vocally disagree. But she didn't. Her fur flattened as she gave me a look of sympathy as well, and she nuzzled my hand before curling up next to me.

My thoughts wandered as I waited for Iga to return. Rangi's words and final actions... It really had seemed like he cared. But had he really? The pessimist in me fervently denied this while the optimist tried to convince me that he cared. I'd said it myself, his hatred was driven by what he'd heard. He seemed to regret every beat of our fight. In addition to that, he tried to heal me instead of himself, even if he had nothing to gain from it.

And that smile, that last one was so hauntingly genuine.

My fingers clenched as I swallowed hard. Was I actually doing this? Was I admitting that he did care? I closed my eyes. He may have, but I still didn't forgive him.

Someone entered the room again, and I figured it was Iga. The sound of her voice confirmed it. "Loto?" I opened my eyes and looked at her. In one of her hands was a small cloth, and I could see that it was dusted with a blue-green powder. She held the cloth out to me. "Breathe in when you're ready," she said. I did, and the smell of earth and grass filled my nose. Immediately the haze in my mind returned and began to engulf me, pulling me back into sleep.

I'm sorry, Rangi, I thought faintly. For the both of us.