Link's POV

The next morning, Zelda's dad leaves the house at 7 AM. I can hear the sound of his car door through the open window. Literally two seconds later, Zelda knocks on our door.

"Link, are you awake yet?" she says. "Father has left for work. Are you up?"

"Yeah," I answer groggy and get up from the floor to open the door for her.

Malice is still sleeping. She's curled up in the fluffy white blanket and doesn't even notice it when I almost trip over her on my way to the door.

I turn the lock and open the door. Zelda is already dressed and ready for the day even though it's only 7 in the morning.

"Hey, good morning," she says with a warm smile.

"Mhh," I stretch my back and rub my eyes. "Mornin'."

"How did the night go?" She asks, peeking past me into the room. "Huh? Why is Malice sleeping on the floor?"

I stick with one question at a time. "The night went okay," I say. "She woke up a couple of times to complain about pain but now she's passed out."

"Would be passed out," Malice murmurs from behind me, "if people weren't having a full blown conversation right next to me."

I look over my shoulder. Malice is awake now. As she sits up to stretch, the blanket drops down and her bare torso is no longer covered. Zelda gasps. She looks back and forth between Malice and me to put the pieces together.

"Link?" She sounds suspicious. "Why is Malice wearing nothing but a bra?"

"I'm wearing shorts," Malice corrects her but it doesn't seem to comfort Zelda at all.

It's way too early to be having this conversation but I guess there is no point in avoiding it. I step into the hallway and shut the door behind me to give us some privacy. "We need to talk."

"Link?" Zelda is visibly nervous.

I check both ends of the hallway. "Are we alone in the house?"

Not breaking eye contact, she shakes her head, "The maid."

"Let's go to your room then."

Zelda follows me without a word. I don't mean to make her nervous. She probably thinks I slept with Malice, and even though I didn't, her guess isn't too far off.

We close the door to her room and take a seat on her bed. She waits for me to speak but I have no idea how to tell her what happened last night. I was up all night, thinking about how to tell her, but I came up with absolutely nothing.

Zelda is already so insecure about anything intimate and has worried about me and Malice in the past. If I tell her what Malice did last night, Zelda might never let go of those insecurities. She'll get angry and blame me for it and tell me to leave again.

I don't want to get into a fight again, but there's no point in lying to her. I'm sick of having a relationship where we hide things from each other. She deserves to know.

"Last night..." I begin, still not sure how to actually tell her.

After a few seconds of nothing, she nudges closer. "Last night what?"

"Um..." I shift my body on the bed so we face each other. "Malice took off her shirt."

"I already know that much," Zelda replies. "Why did she do that?"

When I don't answer, she asks, "Did something happen between you two?"

"No," I answer too quickly. I should really think before I talk. I straighten my back and correct myself, "Well I guess something did happen..."

Zelda looks stunned and confused. "Something intimate?"

"Um... I guess, yeah..."

"You guess? It's a yes or no question..." Zelda looks more and more nervous and I feel like I'm walking on thin ice. "Link? Yes or no? Did something intimate happen between you and her?"

"Yes, but it was one-sided," I say. It's too late to back out now. I better just tell her already so she can stop worrying. "Malice tried to sleep with me."

Zelda's cheeks turn red and her jaw clenches. She doesn't say anything though, so I keep going.

"She got on top of me and I guess she wanted to see if I'd stop her or if I'd go along with it. Obviously I stopped her and told her to stay away from me. I even tried to sleep on the floor so we wouldn't have to share the bed, but then she just ended up sleeping next to me on the floor."

"Link..." Zelda's voice is less than a whisper.

"I know this must sucks to hear, but I really tried to keep my distance. I told her over and over to stay away from me. Also, Malice and I already talked about it and I made it clear to her that she can't do stuff like that ever again. She knows she fucked up and she said she won't do it again. So please don't get upset."

"I'm not mad, if that's what you're thinking..."

"Are you sad?" I ask.

She shakes her head. I consider telling her the second part of the story. So far she's been really calm about it and I could just leave it at that. But I'm trying to be more open with her... Even if it's really hard at times like this.

"There's more," I admit.

"Okay," she braces herself and waits for me to speak.

"When your dad walked down the hallway last night, Malice was purposefully making some weird noises when he passed by our door. She was gonna get us caught, so I held her down and covered her mouth, which felt kind of intimate in a really weird and uncomfortable way." Zelda's brows furrow, making me pause. I don't even really know what happened next anyways. I just know Malice got really touchy and I got out of bed as fast as I could.

"And then what?" Zelda asks cautiously.

"Malice put her hand..." I begin, but Zelda's reaction makes me stop myself from saying more. She's covering her mouth in shock and I can't tell if she's hurt or disgusted, and I don't know if she wants me to comfort her or give her space, or if she wants to hear the rest.

Suddenly she falls into my arms, giving me the biggest hug ever. "I'm so sorry," she says to my surprise.

Why is she apologizing to me?

Speechless, I just hug her back. I didn't expect this reaction at all. I thought she might get angry at me or start crying and get insecure again.

"You don't have to tell me what happened," she says, squeezing me tighter. "I'm sorry that happened to you. Are you okay?"

I think about her question for a second. Then I nod, "I'm okay."

"I'm really proud of you for opening up to me. I know it's not easy." Zelda nuzzles her head between my jaw and my shoulder, her arms wrapped around my back. "I understand how you feel. I'm here for you, just like you've always been there for me."

"It's not that big of a deal," I say. I'm so confused. I thought for sure she'd be mad or disappointed. But instead she's proud of me?

She strokes my back and hugs me as if I'm a kid that fell from the monkey bars and scraped a knee or something.

"Hey, I'm okay," I assure her, comforting her even though she's the one trying to comfort me. "You okay?" I ask worried.

"Nobody should have to go through that, Link. It's awful that you had to experience sexual assault."

Assault? I didn't even think of it like that... Now I feel a bit weird about it...

"I'm glad that you felt comfortable enough to tell me though. Thank you, Link."

"Of course. You're my girlfriend." I pat her back, unsure how to react to this.

She breaks our hug to look at me. "I've been very patient and understanding with Malice, but this is too much, even for her standards. If you'd like, I will talk to her about this and set things right. But if you don't want me to talk to her, I completely understand. Just know that her actions will have consequences."

"It's up to you if you want to talk to her, I don't mind either way. But, Zelda... Malice told me her reasons for why she did it, and I think you should know her reasons too before you take action."

I tell Zelda everything Malice told me last night: that she only did what she did because of her past experience with guys. And that sexual abuse is the reason why Malice didn't feel safe sleeping in the same room as me until she knew I wasn't going to do anything to her.

Zelda is a lot more understanding once she hears the full story and reconsiders speaking to Malice about this. I don't think there's a need as long as this doesn't happen again, and Zelda agrees.

Zelda makes me promise to tell her if Malice ever tries to get close to me like that again and I gladly agree because this conversation went so much better than I thought it would. Maybe being open to her isn't so bad after all.

I'm relieved and way less stressed now. And to be honest, I'm proud of Zelda too for reacting the way she did.

"Thanks for being understanding," I say to her after our conversation.

"You still look upset," Zelda notes.

"I just feel a little guilty is all."

"About what?"

"The whole thing," I say. "I feel like it could've gone differently... I don't know." I shrug and rub my sore neck. "I just feel like I fucked up or something."

Zelda tilts her head, taking a moment to think. "I can assure you that you did not 'fuck up.' I've been where you are though, so I know the feelings of shame, guilt, and confusion that come with it. It's okay to be vulnerable right now, but don't put it all on yourself."

"Why not? I feel like I should've done something to stop it."

"I felt the same way, Link. Healing takes time. It's okay to feel hurt and angry, but it's important to understand that it's not your fault. Assault is about power and control, and the blame does not lie with you."

She gives my hand a gentle squeeze.

"After Karusa assaulted me, I blamed myself and felt a deep sense of shame for 'letting it happen.' The guilt weighed heavily on my shoulders and I can imagine you going through similar emotions right now. However, I want you to know that you needn't carry that weight all alone. I have since learned that there are people in my life who will carry the weight with me." She holds my hand in both of hers and speaks softly, "Let me be that person for you now."

I appreciate her words, and I nod even though I don't completely agree with her. The thing with her and Karusa was way different. It wasn't her fault because she couldn't have stopped him. But me? I'm bigger and stronger than Malice, and I could've easily done something to prevent everything from happening.

"Do you feel at fault for what happened?" Zelda asks me. I nod, avoiding her eyes. "But Malice initiated it, right?"

"Yeah but I can't really blame her for what happened, because she explained why she did it. She had a reason. I didn't."

"So am I understanding this right? You feel inclined to blame yourself because the only other person to blame is Malice, and blaming her feels wrong because it would make you look insensitive to her past experiences?"

She's spot on. "Yeah."

"Link... Consider this," she waits for me to look at her eyes. She looks so understanding and compassionate. "What if nobody is to blame?"

"You don't get it, Zelda. Malice did something last night... something that might be justified on her part but not on mine. It shouldn't have happened. And I didn't stop her because I was scared she'd make more noise and get us caught if I tried to push her off." I shake my head, feeling annoyed at myself. "I just feel shitty for not stopping her immediately, okay?"

Zelda reassures me, "It's not your fault and it's not fully hers either. Malice had her own reasons, and so did you. It shouldn't have happened, but it did. It's unfortunate, but it's not your fault."

"I want to see your point, Zelda, but something about it bothers me."

"And what's that?"

I look away again. "Do you feel that way about Karusa?"

Zelda takes a steady breath and nods, "Sometimes."

"You don't think it's his fault?"

Zelda shrugs. "I used to blame him. And I used to blame myself. Now I try not to blame anyone. There is no point in holding on to all that anger."

"But he still made the decision to go against your consent. So he's at fault," I argue.

"Then Malice is at fault for what she did to you," Zelda says.

"It's not that simple though."

"No, it's not," Zelda agrees. "Because Malice had a reason. She was only protecting herself. And she was scared."

"Yeah, and I bet you Karusa wasn't scared," I say.

"Perhaps not. But I'm sure he had a reason."

"Doubt it," I shake my head. "He's just sick in his head. Why are you constantly defending him?"

"Link," she remains calm. "I'm not defending Karusa's actions, nor am I defending Malice's actions. All I'm trying to say is that we don't know why Karusa did it. We haven't lived Karusa's life. We haven't experienced what he has experienced. We don't know what happened to him in the past, or what he was thinking when he decided to force himself on me. We don't know why he did what he did."

"Why do you care to know? What difference does it make?"

"Don't you see? Once Malice told you that she was only trying to stay in charge of her body because other guys have abused her in the past, things made a little more sense to you. You understood why she did it, and knowing her reasons helped you process the whole situation. You were able to let go of that anger and confusion and you were able to talk to me about it the very next morning.

"My experience with Karusa was quite a bit different. He never told me why he assaulted me. For months I had to carry that weight by myself. So part of me, while still angry at Karusa, naturally wonders about his reasons. What he did was wrong, yes, but if I had known why he did what he did, perhaps I could have processed it better. Perhaps I could have understood. And maybe I could have opened up about it sooner. I could have healed quicker."

"Does it really make that big of a difference to you?" I ask and she nods.

"Knowing his reasons would give me closure."

"Is that why you texted him? So you could ask him for his reasons?"

"It's possible that that's why I was so drawn to reaching out to him. I actually tried asking him about it that one time when I spoke with him while you were in a coma. Karusa refused to discuss his actions with me though, and I'd be lying if I said I'm not still curious."

I frown. "You're not thinking of reaching out to him again, are you?"

"No," she shakes her head. "I promise you I will not reach out to him again." She meets my eyes and gives me a small smile. "Link, can I ask you something?"

"What?"

"If a girl like Malice, who is terrified of men and protective of her body due to years of physical and sexual abuse, considers Karusa a close friend and even calls him a brother, what does that tell us about him?"

I shrug. I don't care what Malice thinks of Karusa. He is and always will be an asshole. "What are you trying to say?"

"Nothing. It was just a thought," she replies, still sounding supportive and sweet.

She's too good to people. If only she knew about all the things Karusa has said and done to me. She'd probably be scared shitless. She would never go near Karusa again. Maybe she'd finally stop thinking that there's some kind of good person deep down inside of his rotten shell. Even if he treats Malice like a good friend, that doesn't make him a good person. And just because he hasn't assaulted Malice doesn't mean he's redeemed for his assault on Zelda.

Zelda cups my cheek and gives my forehead a kiss. "I'm sorry for bringing up Karusa."

"It's fine," I shrug.

"Would you like to talk more about last night?"

"Nah, I think I'm good," I say. "I'm just glad you're okay. Thanks for being there for me."

"Of course, Link. And again, what happened last night wasn't your fault."

"Okay."

She hesitates, biting her cheek. Then she grabs my hand again. "Are you okay?"

She can tell I'm upset. I feel annoyed and I don't really know why. I guess it's because of Karusa. Just don't like thinking or talking about him. But that's not on Zelda, so I shouldn't let it out on her. She's been nothing but sweet to me. I can count myself lucky to have her as my girlfriend.

This whole thing actually kind of opened my eyes about Zelda's situation. I never really knew what she went through emotionally after the whole thing with Karusa went down. Now I got a little glimpse at how she must have felt back then. Only is Karusa much taller and stronger than Malice, and aggressively forced himself on Zelda while Malice was just teasing me. Karusa physically hurt Zelda too from what she told me. Malice didn't really harm me last night, she just overstepped my boundaries.

What Zelda went through must have been so much scarier... And even though she didn't open up about it for a while, she handled it so much better than I probably would have if I was in her shoes. It's crazy how she's not letting those experiences define her anymore. Instead, she's using them to understand and comfort me. She's incredibly strong and she doesn't even have the slightest idea how far she's come since last year.

I cup her cheeks and pull her in for a kiss. "I love you."

Her smile grows. I smile back at her, feeling more relaxed. I can finally calm down and stop thinking about what happened last night. Talking to Zelda really helped, even if it doesn't come naturally to me. But I want to work on opening up to her more often. I wasn't lying when I told her dad that I'm committed to getting better.

"Shall we get ready for school then?" Zelda suggests.

"Sure, but what about Malice?"

"She'll be staying at the house. She's still in recovery and has nowhere else to go."

"Do you have a plan? What if she gets caught?" I ask.

"She will keep the door locked."

"What if the maid tries to get in to clean or something?"

"I will tell the maid to refrain from entering the guest bedroom for today."

"And your dad?"

"I will speak with him tonight," she tells me determined as she gets up from the bed to grab her stuff. "I will bid him to let Malice stay until she has fully recovered."

Still sitting on the bed, I ask, "And what happens if he says no?"

"I will let you know when it comes to that." She picks up her bookbag, throws it over her shoulder, and stops by the door. She looks back at me with a smile. "You coming?"