After what felt like hours I could finally breath again. Ryan stood up from the table to bring me a glass of water and some advil for my head that was killing me by now. I gulped down the pills and the complete glass of water in one breath, turns out crying your eyes out for almost an hour makes you thirsty.

" You wanna go upstairs and rest for a while? " Ryan asked me after I had visibly calmed down. Even though I was feeling extremely drained I wanted to stay there. Staying near Ryan was helping me relax and think clear, which was sort of scaring me too. He was a stranger after all, I didn't know anything about him. " No, I don't wanna sleep, " I replied smiling gratefully at him. He smiled back at me looking relieved now that I wasn't crying anymore. "Alright then let's go sit on the couch instead. It isn't the most comfortable couch but it'll help you relax. " He helped me stand and together we moved to the couch.

I sat down on his brown leather couch and he dragged a chair directly in front of me to sit in. " I'm sorry I bawled in there, I just..... I don't know.... I think I'm going insane, " I sighed. He laughed, " Well then you're welcome to join my club. We are one happy insane family! " He flashed me his oscar-worthy smile. God he was attractive.

"Evelyn? " he suddenly looked at me suspiciously and I froze. Did he know something? Did he recognize me? " Yeah? " I hesitated while deliberately looked around the place, anywhere but into his eyes. " Do you wanna tell me something? You were kinda about to last night but then you passed out and I brought you home. " All the emotions drained from my eyes. I knew where this was going.

" What did I tell you? " I murmured. " Nothing much, you just told me that you were from New York and that your name.. " he stalled in his sentence and I could tell that he was doubting me. I figured Evelyn wasn't the name that I told him last night which explained his weird reaction when I told him my name earlier. I sighed, " I told you that my name was Tiana Sandford last night, didn't I? " His eyes widened at my words. Maybe he hadn't expected me to be so open with it. Truth be told, I was simply tired of lying around and false identities.

Ryan was a stranger, hence he also was a clean slate. I could start over with him and maybe tell him who I really was. " Umm, yeah and that you were a singer. You are not the Tiana Sandford, that hopelessly awesome American singer, are you? " he looked at me weirdly. I laughed at his look and the disbelief in his voice.

" You know who Tiana is? " I asked him curiously. Even after all these years I still couldn't accept the fact that I was famous and that people all over the world recognized me. " Of course I know who Tiana is. She's an impossible singer, man. I'm kind of a fan, you know, " he said, a little embarrassed. I smiled at his awkwardness. Boy, he was cute too. "Hmm, so you like her music, huh? " I teased him, having a little too much fun in embarrassing him. " Yeah.... She's okay, " he said in a dismissive tone, but the way his eyes lit up I could tell that he drew inspiration from her.

I wanted to end the conversation right there but I also wanted to share my problems with someone, for once in my life. And what's better than to pour your heart out to a stranger, right? This was all too much.

" Umm, Ryan, what if I told you that I wasn't bluffing last night, that what I said is true?" Ryan stared at me for a minute, dumbfounded by what I had just said to him. After a long pause he finally snapped out of his trance and started shaking his head, " No way in this world could I be sitting in my living room with the Tiana Sandford....this is surreal. " I smiled, " Yeah you're right, you're not sitting with Tiana, you're sitting with Evelyn, the girl who just cried her hearts out on your shoulder, " I said, a hint of playfulness in my words.

He laughed at my comment and then, to my surprise, he kneeled down near me and looking up at me, a glint of mischief in his eyes, he whispered, " I'm such a great fan of yours Miss Sandford, would you mind giving me your autograph? " That made me laugh. " Shut up, Matthews ! " I pushed him back playfully and he slipped off his heels but then sat down on the floor, his head resting against the chair. " Okay help me get this straight, who is Tiana and who is Evelyn? " Ryan asked me with humouring eyes. I giggled at his expression.

I pulled my legs up on the couch and then took the comforter lying on the other end of the couch and spread it over my legs. Ryan got up from the floor and joined me on the couch. It was still quite early in the morning and the air was crisp and cold. The winters hadn't set in completely yet but it was still cold enough to make me want to cuddle in a blanket all day. I wasn't a winter person. Ryan sat near me. Our knees brushed past each other under the comforter and I felt a tingling sensation at the point of contact. I pulled away a little and cleared my throat softly.

There was something about Ryan that made me want to burn my walls down. I mean I had just told him the truth about my identity, something I had hid from everyone for over 7 years now. His eyes just had something in them that made you confess everything to him. It was too dangerous for me. My brain was telling me to keep my defenses up and not trust this stranger but I just couldn't help myself. Maybe it was just my hang over, messing my thoughts up. Definitely the hangover!

He was staring down at me. His bright blue eyes were searching my green depths and I wanted to dive in those eyes and never come up for air. Lyrics filled my brain instantly and I wanted to write them down before I lost them but I couldn't move. I was paralyzed under his gaze and he felt just the same. My heart wasn't racing instead it was calming down.

He cracked a small smile at me and that did the trick. I snapped out of my trance and looked down at my hands. He cleared his throat, " So, who's Evelyn and who's Tiana? You don't have an alter ego now, do you?" And just like that the awkwardness in the room vanished. I laughed at his statement. " No, I don't have an alter ego. Tiana is.... well... my stage name. It's hard you know, to be in the media's spotlight all the time. My actual name is the only thing that feels like mine now, if you know what I mean.  It's just....you're the first one I've ever told this. " I looked down and fiddled with my ring nervously.

Ryan put a finger under my chin and lifted my face to make me look at him. He then smiled at me reassuringly, " Don't worry Evelyn, I won't tell a soul, cross my heart, " and proceeded to make a cross over his heart. I smiled at his attempt to make me feel better. "Now, you had a very bad day yesterday, I think you should rest for a bit. You wanna go upstairs? " He asked. I shook my head lightly and answered in a meek voice, " I don't wanna be alone. "

I hated being so weak and vulnerable but at that moment that was all I felt. Scared and broken. All my life I had been looking out for myself on my own with no one around to care enough. It had made me accept that I had no one. It was sad, I know, but it's the way it was made to be. I had major trust issues yet I trusted Ryan enough to tell him my biggest secret. Damn his midnight eyes!

"Hey, where'd you go? " Ryan whispered while softly brushing a finger across my cheek, pulling me out of my thoughts. " You don't have to be alone, you can just rest your head on my shoulder like before, I promise I won't disturb you. " I smiled at his cuteness. How is it that he looked like a tough, gorgeous bad boy from the outside, yet talked like a complete cheese ball. Whatever it was, I liked it.

I nodded my head and without saying another word I layed my head on his shoulder again making sure there was still enough space between our bodies. Ryan didn't move and I was grateful for it. I didn't want him to get any wrong ideas out of this. "Don't worry, I won't get any wrong ideas, " He whispered and shifted lightly to get comfortable.

Huh, he reads minds now, too? Meh, whatever.

********

• Author's note •

Feel free to share your thought in the comment but remember to be kind.

QOTD :- What is your worst pet peeve?

For me it is loud chewing, for sure!

Much love

M :)