Outside Cal's apartment complex, Reese and I sat in silence in my dad's station wagon. The keys were in the ignition, but I hadn't turned them, so the engine lay dormant somewhere beneath us. It was just us, the purple, pink and orange sky above us, the crickets chirping in a bush nearby.

Reese was silent for what felt like a century. I kept lending him wary sideways glances, but he never moved from his spot: his head up against the window, eyes watching the sunset, breath fogging his reflection in the glass. I didn't know if I was supposed to say something, because this wasn't anything I'd ever done. I interacted with humans, sure, but no one had ever gotten close enough to see this side of my life. How was I supposed to go about explaining this?

I had this awful feeling that it would be easier if I could actually change. I could just say, "And by the way, I'm a werewolf," and be done with it if that were the case. It wasn't, however, and instead I'd have to go into a lengthy explanation of how I was a werewolf and at the same time was not, and if vampires had trouble understanding it, it was going to be impossibly incomprehensible to a human.

But there were two little puncture holes, shallow but noticeable, in the side of Reese's neck that kept me from backing out.

"You killed him."

Out of all the things I'd thought Reese would say, that hadn't been it. I gave him another glance, but he still hadn't really moved. "Who? Ethan?"

Reese gave a solemn nod.

"Yeah," I replied, tapping my fingers across the steering wheel. "He was going to kill you if I didn't. That's the thing about vampires like him. They always want something in return, and usually it's something violent."

The silence we'd been stuck in before returned, if only for a moment. Then Reese pushed out a heavy sigh, lifting himself from against the window and turning towards me. "How can you say that so easily?"

"Say what so easily?"

"Vampires," Reese clarified, "and all that."

"Oh."

"You're telling me that all the books in my basement—my dad's super weird fetish—isn't a fetish?"

I frowned, directing my gaze out my driver's side window. "Well, it might still be a fetish, Reese. I don't know what turns your dad on."

"Theo, you know what I mean," hissed Reese. I'd thought being funny about it would make it easier, but obviously he wasn't in the joking mood. "Vampires...they're real. That guy you killed was a vampire."

I nodded, turning back towards him. His eyes, a pallid blue nearly identical to his father's, were burning into me, dimmer without sunlight in them. It was more than curiosity for him. It was a necessity. He had questions that needed to be answered, and I was his only hope. "Yes, he was," I muttered. "And so was the girl."

"And so are you?" he cut in.

I scoffed, then stretched my arm out, resting my wrist against the car console between us. Reese just gave me a weird look, his rust-colored hair hanging in sweaty clumps across his forehead. When he didn't seem to get the memo, I cleared my throat and said, "Put two fingers there, Reese. Feel for a pulse."

He hesitated, but did as I asked. "You have one."

I drew my arm back. "Exactly. So, no, I'm not a vampire. I just happen to be rubbing shoulders with them often, recently. Which is what got you in this mess, so I'm sorry about that."

Reese reached a hand up, pinching the skin between his eyebrows. I could imagine the information must have been a lot to handle; no wonder he felt weary. I'd never really had a major epiphany, but I suspected that, for a human, this one was bigger than most. "If you're not a vampire, then what are you?" Reese asked me. He squinted at my forehead all of a sudden, his eyes widening after a moment. "The cut that was there—it's gone. It healed that quickly? Theo—"

"God, Reese," I muttered, sitting back against the seat and resting my eyes. "You don't have to interrogate me; I was going to tell you anyway. I'm a werewolf."

Reese paused for a moment, then groaned and collapsed against the dashboard, banging his head repeatedly against it. He only stopped when I reached over and forced him to. "There's no way. This is a dream. There's no way—none of you exist."

"Well, that's not nice," I said with a frown. "Look, Reese. I'm not going to make you believe me. I can't, really. But the teeth marks on your neck are real. The cut that was on my forehead really did heal in half an hour. The proof is all here. You just have to stop denying it."

"If you're a werewolf," Reese replied after a moment, "then change."

Ah. Somehow, I'd known there was going to be some sort of ridiculous request like that. Even if I could undergo the transformation, I wouldn't exactly be able to do it without a full moon, and certainly not inside of a station wagon.

I raised an eyebrow at him, but the expression on his face was intensely demanding. He really didn't believe me.

This was going to be even harder than I'd thought.

I told him, "See, there's actually a few reasons why I can't do that. One, I physically cannot, even if I wanted to, because I don't have the ability to. Two, even if I could, it's not a full moon for at least another week or so, dumbass. Have you read any folklore at all?"

"No," Reese muttered. "My dad's the lore nerd—wait. What did you say?"

I scowled at him. "You heard what I said. You just replied to me."

"No, no, you said—you said you don't have the ability to?" Reese inquired, and when I nodded, gave me the most dumbfounded look I'd ever seen. I had known this was going to be confusing, but he wasn't even trying. He was making it more complicated than it had to be.

"It's like a disability," I said, trying to be concise. "Like some people are born blind, or deaf, or paralyzed, or something. Just like those people, I was born without the ability to do something: and that's to change into a wolf. It's not that confusing."

For a moment, Reese just blinked at me.

Then, "Let me get this straight. You're a werewolf...without a wolf."

"Yeah, basically."

"What the hell does that make you, then? Just a were-nothing?"

I grinned. It had been the same question Cal had asked the night I'd first met her, that one night that tangled me in a web I couldn't escape from anymore. Not that I wanted to.

Cal. I could still taste her.

"I have everything else," I told him. "The silver vulnerability, the heightened senses, the fast healing. I just can't change. I've never been able to. Enough about me, though—how exactly did Ethan find you?"

Reese's eyes narrowed. "You're changing the subject."

"Evidently."

"Why?"

"Maybe I'm just a little ashamed at how pathetic my entire existence is, Reese. Jesus. Answer the question."

He rolled his eyes at me, and I realized then how easy this conversation had been, even if the topic hadn't been the best. Before, even though I'd enjoyed Reese's company, our conversations had been one-sided, Reese genuinely interested, me just trying to tiptoe around the subjects that would reveal a whole world he knew nothing about. He hadn't known me, really, just the human face I put on.

Now, though, my mask was off, and it was like breathing for the first time in years.

Reese said, "I was raking leaves in my backyard, and then this guy in a cloak comes out of nowhere. He dragged me to his car and tied me up, and I couldn't fight him—he was insanely strong. Next thing I knew, I was here."

"So he must have been watching you for a while," I murmured. "He was just waiting for the right time to pounce."

"But he's gone now, right? So we're safe?"

I jerked the key then, the engine roaring to life. By now, the colors of the sunset had all blended into a dim twilight blue, stars beginning to twinkle to life above our heads. Rolling the window down, I let the night breeze wash over me as my brain turned over my thoughts.

Jardetzky.

For some reason, the name terrified my family. I wanted to believe it was for no reason at all, but after meeting Reese's dad, seeing his eyes again in my dream, I couldn't be sure.

To Reese, I said, "You're safe. I don't know about me."

"What's that supposed to mean, Theo?"

"No one," I began, turning towards him, scrutinizing him, making sure he understood the seriousness of this, "can know about this—about the vampires, about me, about my family. No one, Reese. Not even your parents. Do you understand?"

Reese swallowed, but nodded his head. "Yeah, I got it."

"I'm taking a risk with you alone, Reese," I told him, pressing the gas pedal. "Don't make me regret this."

I glanced at him, his eyes wide, cheeks flushed. I wasn't sure if trusting him was a mistake, but at this point, I didn't have a choice. This was one of the cases where taking risks was safer than staying in my little, closed-off comfort zone.

 I sighed, pulling out of the parking lot and in the direction of Reese's house.