Children run through the living room, pushing past fellow pack members as they jump over other children or over the couches. They dodge the adults in the room, laughing as they play a game, the smiles upon their faces are pure. I dodge one of the small boys who runs, quick to get out of the way as the woman showing me around the pack house discusses with me about the territory of Crimson Lock.

"Many of the parents here are warriors or work downtown at Nixon's office," Cecil informs, a girl a little younger than me entering the room, calling after a few of the kids. I recognize her for sure, one of Taylor's pals from school, a golden blond with blue eyes. She's a gossiper, someone known for her looks and backstabbing at the school. No doubt she will talk about me at my old high school, telling them about the so-called slut who married Nixon Maxwell. "A few of the teenagers in the pack help take care of them after school and on the weekends if needed. This is Ivy," Cecil explains, introducing me to a girl I know already does not like me.

"Hi, I'm Lily," I introduce myself, offering her a warm smile as she picks up one of the running children, carrying him on her back now as she slightly glares at me.

"You don't want to be called Mrs. Maxwell or Luna Lily?" She asks, tone holding a sharp aspect that goes unnoticed by Cecil. I already know most of the teenagers in this pack will not like me, but for their parents and the people that protect the pack, I have earned their loyal respect.

"Lily is fine. I'm not big on formality," I respond, Ivy nodding as she takes the small boy out of the room with her, the other children following behind, leaving Cecil and I back to our conversation before. Cecil is kind, the wife of the pack doctor, already liking me as I can tell by the way her smiles are genuine and she introduces me to pack members like an old friend.

"Let me show you where the Lunas do their work. We have an office for you," she informs, motioning for me to follow as we leave the room and head down a new hallway.

"What work usually takes place in the Luna's office?" I ask, looking around the hallway. The dark blue walls paired with the mahogany floors, and the wooden doors lining the hall.

Cecil stops before a larger door than the rest, smiling to me as she pushes it open to reveal a beautiful modern office. Stepping in, a smile stretches across my face, taking in the lavender walls, mahogany floors, modern and large windows on either side of a white marble fireplace. A white, modern desk is placed before a set of white bookshelves, a leather chair fit in some CEO's office placed there, a modern chandelier hanging from the high ceiling, and a small lounge area of white couches with floral pillows.

"Every Luna gets to decorate the office as their own, so if you wish to change the look, you may," Cecil informs as my smile becomes smaller. This is how Lillian decorated her office. I'll hand it to her, she had good taste.

"You know what, I'll keep the look," I reply, looking around as I appreciate how the late Luna decorated the office.

Cecil nods. "Your work usually includes planning pack gatherings or-

"Any pack business that Nixon might do? Territory stuff or treaties?" I ask, hating that I just interrupted Cecil. She's tense when I use Nixon's name, not because I did not say Alpha, but because of what he has done that causes these people to tense. "It's just that gatherings to plan sounds like I don't deserve an office."

Cecil offers me a gentle smile, one that lets me know I will not like what she is going to say. "Traditions, Luna Lily," she begins, "Lunas are for planning social events more than helping do treaties. You involvement with treaties will really only be when Alpha Nixon invites the other Alphas over for the signing and you greet them."

I would like to change that tradition. I take it Alpha Penelope faced much scrutiny as a female Alpha. I take it any female Alpha has faced those haters who try and pin her to a role she was not meant for. "The pack is very nice here," I comment, changing the subject as Cecil nods.

"The pack truly adores you, you know," she states, meeting my gaze. "They see you are a sweet Luna and do care for this pack."

"And I do," I confirm, smiling. "I know being human may put me at a disadvantage to understand your traditions, but I think being human has helped because it's allowed me to see so much of your world," I add, hoping Cecil will spread the news to the pack about how I feel about them.

Within the next three hours I am back at my house, sitting on the side of the bed as I take in a deep breath. Spinning the ring around my finger, I sigh, looking to the window as I see the garden below. I slide my hands to my stomach, thinking of the child within me that will one day look out upon the pack I have seen today. I want this child to appreciate the pack that they were born into, to trust and respect them as the pack will for my child. A boy or a girl...I wonder which one. Names have barely crossed my mind, but I know that if this child will be a girl, I will want her name to be Genevieve. I like the sound of the name, the certain elegance it holds as a name. As for a boy? I have not picked because I do not want to think about the child being a boy. But this is a fifty-fifty chance. One or the other and soon I will find out.

My phone rings, only one person I know to be calling. Taking in a deep breath, I pick up my phone, agreeing to the call as I place the device to my ear.

"Hey," I greet, standing up from the side of the bed as I head to the balcony, taking a seat on the lounging chair.

"We're you fucking Gavin?! Is this why your number is in his phone?!"

"Taylor?"

"Were you fucking him?" She snaps, asking the question as my eyes widen. She has Gavin's phone, somehow having either found it or come across my contact since he died.

"No I was not," I answer, every word I speak true. "Gavin was helping me uncover things. This is why he had my number."

"Uncover things like some fetish you never knew you had?" Taylor asks, tone harsh as I roll my eyes.

"Taylor, I warned you that Gavin was in trouble, for you to talk some sense into him, and now he is gone," I inform, pinching the bridge of my nose.

I head her yelling to someone. Probably mom or dad. "You married that prick," Taylor hisses. "You married Nixon Maxwell and have shamed our family."

"There is now our," I snap, refuting her words. "We are broken, Taylor. Our family is shattered. Since when do you give a damn about mending relationships here?" I await her words, words that will cut like a knife as the silence present is causing fear to stir in my heart. "I told you Gavin was trouble...I even warned you that he was in trouble and you hung up and didn't do a thing."

Silence once again as I lean again the brick wall, facing the garden as I see Oliver's house, his room light on. I once was a guest in his house many times, laughing as my youth was just taking shape and I had a new chapter of life awaiting me. Yes, what I live now is also a new chapter, one where Nixon has become a central character to the plot even more than he ever did. The moment that our child arrives, another chapter will begin. But in my innocent youth, before I watched my world burn, I dreamt of college, of majoring in physics and moving to Colorado where I could meet new faces and make new memories.

"Where is he?"

Does Taylor not know that Gavin is dead? That he was shot and his body dragged out. Could I tell her that he is dead? Does she believe that he left her and has moved away? To Taylor, everyone abandons her eventually, that they leave her because of her madness. Do I tell a girl who believes that all people leave her that the man she was sexually involved with is dead by the hands of the man I call my husband? Or do I let her believe that yet another person has left her...

Do I tell the truth or a lie? A year ago I would have told her the truth right away because I was raised to know those moral values. But now, lying is much less harmful...easier than telling the shattering truth to someone so broken already. Taylor isn't a wolf, meaning if she has it in her, she will report him missing or say he was murdered and call me in to testify as I have told her the news. Sure, I am not a wolf either, but if I am called in to testify, then Nixon will become involved and he can just make the investigation come to a close. Nixon could make Gavin disappear just like he did to Adam. Nixon could make the investigation end just like he did to Lillian's. If I tell Taylor...then she will still never know what really happened, for the investigation will be closed the moment it opens.

"Tell me this, Lily," Taylor begins, her words cutting through ice, "did you prick of a husband kill Gavin?"

What do I say?

"No, Taylor, Nixon did not," I reply, the line going dead as she hangs up.

Sliding down the wall and sitting on the balcony floor, I lift my eyes up to the sky, taking in a deep breath. Taylor expects Gavin to be dead, but she cannot know that Nixon killed him. Why? Why did I protect Nixon Maxwell? It would be another name, another reason, for his pack to fear him even more. It would serve another reason to make his pack fear him and be connected with another murder. Did I do it for the pack? Not truly. No, I did it for my child, for my child to not grow up under the roof of a man who may have also killed his ex-beta. Lillian's death is already enough to taint the childhood of this baby I am to raise and keep out of trouble. Sure, it sounds insane, but Nixon cannot have another name in his kill list that causes pack members to distance themselves from my child. I need the pack to raise this child alongside me, to teach it tradition and values that Nixon could have forgotten over time.

Closing my eyes, I take in steady breaths, focusing on calming down as those dark blue eyes flash through my mind. How can I find a sense of justice in lying and keeping Nixon's name less tainted than it already is? How can I allow myself to let Nixon off easy from Gavin's death just because I need this child to be raised by his pack?

I want to say that it is some motherly instinct that aids me believing that this is all justifiable, but in reality, it's not motherly instinct at all. No. Not at all. So what is it? Is it that I believe karma will catch up with Nixon and deal him the justice he deserves? Is it that I somehow believe Nixon will change his ways for the better when this child is born? Or is it that I am just as fucked up as Nixon is?

It's a mixture of all three: the perfect recipe for disaster.

<><>

"You're about nine weeks along," Dr. Morgan informs, holding the folder close to his chest as I nod my head, laying back down in the chair. Nixon sits beside me, hand holding my own as the doctor picks up our child's heartbeat. "In a few months you can come back and find out the sex of your baby." I nod, nervous as I lean my head back and let out a deep breath. I'm only eighteen and here I sit, listening to the heartbeat of my child that will be born into a world I never knew existed until this past year.

"Are there any supplements Lily should be taking or any precautions?" Nixon asks, worried for my health as my heart swells. I'm happy to hear him worried for my health as well as the child's, looking out for his family. Moments like these give me hope for our family.

As the doctor replies to the man I call my husband, I look to the ceiling of the office, focusing on calming down as I squeeze Nixon's hand. "So, I will see you two in a few weeks and catch up," Dr. Morgan states, helping me up from the chair as Nixon thanks the doctor. As the doctor leaves, Nixon stands before me as I still sit, hands cupping my face as I take in a deep breath. A year ago I wanted a Jim and Pam relationship, one beautiful and that you never want to end; however, here I am, in the arms of someone I want to keep a distance from our child. I will have to tighten down on Nixon, to tell him how we will raise our child and that I do not want his morals to infect this child.

"Nervous?" Nixon asks, resting his forehead against mine as I find my palms becoming sweaty.

"Aren't all new parents? Aren't you?" I ask, my legs feeling like jelly as I do not want to stand. "I never wanted to be a mom so young in life, hell, I'm not even legally old enough to drink."

Nixon smiles, a genuine smile as he pulls back, helping me down from the chair. "Yes, I am nervous, Lily, because bringing a child into this world is a huge responsibility, but if I am certain about anything, it's that you will be a fantastic mom and I will love this child," he whispers, kissing my cheek as I find myself feeling a bit of happiness. It's words like these I wish Nixon would always say, always happy and proud as we seem like a perfect couple. A happy couple. "Are you ready to go back home?"

I nod, following Nixon out of the doctor's office with my hand in his. As we walk into the parking lot and Nixon unlocks the Tesla, I hop into the passenger's side. With my seatbelt on and my head resting back, Nixon hops in, driving off as I run a hand stressfully through my hair. "Taylor called me last month," I inform, remembering when my sister called me and asked if Nixon killed Gavin. It's been a month and I didn't think I would ever tell Nixon. "She wanted to know what happened to Gavin."

Nixon pulls into the side of the road, knuckles white as he grasps the wheel. "What did she suspect?" Nixon asks, keeping his voice calm and as try and remain clam rather than tense up and welcome the stress.

"She asked me if you killed him," I inform, meeting his intense stare as I take in a deep breath. "I told her that you did not."

"What did she say?"

"She hung up," I reply, facing Nixon, trying to keep myself at ease as Nixon pinches the bridge of his nose. He tries to steady himself, as if repeating things in his mind to help him calm down and not take it out. "She hasn't called me back," I add, trying to aid Nixon in relaxing.

Nixon nods, looking back to me as I don't see anger in his eyes, but nothing. Just an endless void. "Thank you for telling me," he informs, offering me a small smile as I nod my head. I know ever since news of the pregnancy hit, Nixon has been trying to remain calm, to not have an outcry or yell. He's trying to help me out, to help us out.

"You didn't deserve to know that," I inform, my voice stern. "You don't deserve to know anything like that ever since you killed him. I do not owe you a damn thing."

His hands tighten around the wheel, knuckles as white as snow as I know what I have said and that it means an argument. "I had to get a point across to you," he responds, his choice of words not wise at all.

Looking to Nixon, I hold my head high and find myself biting the inside of my cheek. "You're trying to forget what happened," I begin, Nixon raising an eyebrow. "You're trying to forget and erase the marks that Lillian left in your mind. You killed Gavin, you killed him to, yes, warn me in a fucked up way, but you're also trying to forget what Lillian brought into your life."

"You know nothing about what you're saying," Nixon growls, the tension intensifying as I find my throat run dry. "You know nothing about what that woman did to my world. How she tore apart so much of the dam that kept my demons tame."

"I know you still cannot forget her because no matter how much you try," I snap. "You still have the piano, like some sick trophy to remind you that you 'took out the trash.'"

Fingers wrap around my chin, holding it tight as I maintain eye contact with the beast that threatens to be released.

"Never talk of Lillian again," Nixon states, his voice soft, calm, scaring me at how he has calmed down and stares into my gaze. "She was not the angel that the world wanted to believe she was." That gives him no justification.

"Marriage means that we hold no secrets from the other," I comment, pointing out part of the vows we took when we tied the knot. "We promised when we got married."

"You really want to know what kind of demon she was?" Nixon asks, slightly chuckling as he thinks me to be insane. "You really want to know the truth of Lillian Rice, the woman my pack adored and trusted. The woman who tried to burn my world...trust me, Lily, she is part of the past for a reason."

As we arrive home, words not spoken, the garage door slides open and Nixon parks the car. Silence surrounds us as he opens the door for me, helping me out as I look to the doorway where stairs lead up to the first story from the garage basement. A part of me wonders what Lillian did that caused Nixon to react the way he just did. She had an affair and that is all I know. All I know for why he would want to kill her.

"She was insane," he whispers, the words hanging low as the darkness of the garage consumes us. Turning to look at the man I call my husband, he leans again one of his posh cars, hands in his pockets as he looks to the doorway ahead. "She manipulated the pack members to points I never though possible. Sure, I killed her, but it wasn't because of some affair with the Wolf King."

"What was it then?"

"She didn't just have miscarriages," Nixon replies, his answer one that interests me. Gavin told me that the slashes upon her body were for each child that she lost. "She aborted all of our children." I raise an eyebrow. "Lillian couldn't have children, and we found that out after her second miscarriage."

"You said she had abortions," I explain, shaking my head as I become confused.

"She was having an affair with Zion. Each child that she kept and ended up miscarrying had the blood of an Alpha King. She told me that these miscarriages were our children until I decided to do some DNA testing." His eyes meet mine. "She hid four abortions from me, the medical bills and insurance paperwork hidden and kept secret."

"So the children that would have been yours, she aborted and the children that would have been Zion's, they were miscarriages?" I ask, getting this right as Nixon nods his head. Lillian killed the children that she would have with Nixon and wanted to keep the ones she would have with Zion. But he still killed her in the end.

Nixon pushes off from the car, walking over to me as his gaze is gentle, calm almost. As his figure stands tall over me, I tilt my head up to maintain eye contact as he gets ready to talk again. "Lillian was a warrior, she never wanted to rule a kingdom beside Zion. She had no desire to wear a crown, so when I became a suitor for her, in who she would marry, she picked me. She picked me because it meant less responsibilities, but she always loved Zion. She wanted to have him with no strings attached while she was married to me."

"And thus the affair," I comment, Nixon nodding as he walks past me, taking ahold of my hand lightly as I follow him. Up the stairs and through the first floor, we arrive at the stairs, the house silent as it seems dead. As we make it to the hallway, we take a left, heading down the familiar path as his office door lays before us.

Nixon pushes the door open, having me enter first as he follows behind. Walking to a bookshelf, Nixon leaves me before the doorway, grabbing ahold of some wooden box set beside a collection of books filled with history. Taking the box down, he opens it, pulling from it a slender dagger, the end sharp and the hilt decorated with engravings of waves.

"She slept with this under her pillow, a gift from Zion for her duties as a royal guard," he informs, putting the box away as he walks back over to me. Handing me the dagger, I take it, the object light in my hands as I see his eyes darken. "I used it to slit her throat."

The dagger drops from my hands, my skin pale and body frozen as it lands on the wooden floor. My eyes glued to Nixon's, I watch as he walks over to me, pushing a lock of my blond hair behind my ear. Leaning in, his lips graze my ear, fear flooding my soul as I can almost feel him smirking. "The night she was murdered, I had caught her using my penthouse for the affair, telling Zion that she would leave me, that she would perhaps even kill me so they could hair the sick little happily ever after."

Nixon pulls back, hands placed on my waist as he lightly guides me back and against the wall, the shadows of the room consuming is. "The night she planned on killing me, I was ready for her. We were at war that night, only, she didn't know I had been planning that night for weeks. As she came at me, I used sharp movements that landed her at my mercy." My blood boils. "She didn't beg for mercy. No, for warriors do not beg their enemy for anything. She screamed as I clawed her for every child she took from me, and she learned her lesson as I stripped her bare, to show the world the slut that she was. I left that pearl necklace around her blood neck because that was a gift from me when we had our last Christmas together just days before."

I want to vomit as he tells me this, as Nixon shows me the demented mind that worked out this whole murder.

"I hate you," I confess, my eyes watering as Nixon pulls back, a smile spreading across his face.

"You wouldn't be the first."