Review 146 // Alora Sovanna

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Here is a review for 5YNFLWR

My comments will be in bold

Basics and grounding

Alright cool cool, I think I've already given my thoughts on this but I get so many characters it's hard to remember.

Character information





Everything here is pretty good, she seems balanced and pretty well done. The only thing I can really suggest is to add more detail to her personality.

Relationships

Alright, these work but just be sure to add more detail and figure out the parents names. Put the same amount if thought into each significant person in her life and make sure that they help develop her and push her along.

Backstory

Alright the first bit is pretty good and you've done well with describing a mental disorder without making it her main focus. The issue lies in the second part because it suddenly picked up the pace and I got a bit lost. Obviously, in a story it'll be explained better in key plot points but since you threw so much at me at once I was a little lost. So, in short, make sure you explain knew concepts to the reader.

Other

Make sure with her powers that you show her training so it makes sense that she can use them.

Stats

Stats are pretty well balanced no issues here.

Final thoughts
I think this character is pretty good and the concepts are cool. Just make sure you add a couple of things and develop her further and she should be good to go.

*My critiques are simply at your request and to help improve your character. It is not my intention to cause any offence and you, of course, do not have to listen to what I've said. This is all just a bit of fun and I apologise if I have done any kind of damage*

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