It wasn't all a lie. I do feel better than I did; anything is better than uncertain whether my legs will hold me or collapse. As I walk, though, it feels like my head is swaying back and forth, and I fight to keep a straight path through the halls. Reaching Reyan's door, I knock, hoping he's already in for the night.

The door sweeps open, and Ren's manservant says in a voice as slick as his hair, "My lord regrets to inform you he does not have any further information at this—" Escian's rote words break off, eyes widening. "Prince Astraeus. And Princesse Consort."

He bows, and I wave him up. "I assume my brother is in."

"Yes, my lord. I'll fetch him just now. Please, if you'll take a seat." The man guides us easily to the couch and hurries into Reyan's bedroom. I hide a smile. In another life, born to other parents, Escian would have made a better courtier than Reyan does.

After a moment, Reyan pushes into the living room. "Brother." A bandage covers one side of his head, but other than that, he seems fine. Shoulders relaxing, he sinks into the armchair across from us. "Good to see you alive."

I nod slowly. "You too."

He glances at Riszev beside me.

"We need to talk. We might have a plan."

"Might have a plan?" Reyan leans forward. "Everyone's been waiting for you to wake up so you could reveal the master strategy behind abandoning the wall, and you're telling me you didn't have one?"

My jaw tightens and eyes flick to Escian. "Can you dismiss your servant?"

Reyan scowls but waves his hand. Escian ducks into the bedroom, and I frown. No doubt he can still hear everything from in there. My voice lowers.

"You said it yourself—our men were getting slaughtered. We had no other hope than to put the shield up around the wall."

"That's still not a plan."

"I'm sorry I couldn't think of how to permanently end the siege in the heat of battle." My gaze pins him. "But now we have something. Do you want to hear it or not?"

His lip curls, but he leans back in his seat. "Go on."

I pause. If word of this gets back to the traitor, then all hope is lost. We'll only be throwing our men headfirst into Antium.

"What is it, Aster?"

My arms cross, and I lean back. "I won't speak until your man is out of the room."

He tilts his head, incredulous. "Are you serious?"

"Yes."

"Escian is not a spy."

"I don't care."

He glowers but calls his servant to dismiss him for the night. Escian bows and leaves on quiet feet.

"Now. Are you going to explain?"

My arms uncross, and I lean forward. "We use the escape tunnel and take their leaders in the night. While they're distracted by the loss, you can bring your men in through the part of the wall the Kadranians snuck through. Whoever doesn't scatter will die."

"Take their leaders how, Aster?" He crosses his arms.

My tongue probes the sore in my lip, but my gaze is level. "However we need to."

"You mean tear into their bedchambers like they tore into Selenia's?"

I lean forward. "I mean give them the same mercy they've shown us."

"We're not monsters," he says, teeth gritted.

My mind flashes to the man in the cell. "We're not deserters, either."

His nostrils flare, but his eyes won't meet mine, and as he sits there, silent, his shoulders slowly fall. "I'm not a coward." He fingers his dagger hilt. "But I won't be party to this."

"You won't be. You'll be leading the force through the wall to break their ranks."

He shakes his head. "We can't. We don't have enough men to take some and leave others in case this goes south."

"If this goes south, we die. We take everyone."

"That's a lot to risk on a plan you just pulled out of your back pocket."

"What have your Lieutenants come up with?"

His eyes cut away. "Nothing useable."

"We have to do something now, Reyan. If we don't give it our all, we might as well walk them through the gate."

Fingers playing at his hilt, he says, "Selenia will never sign off on this. She's already ordered an evacuation for the day after tomorrow. Throwing men at the enemy was all well and good when the Ladies felt we had plenty, but—"

"We're not telling Sela."

Riszev's eyes cut to me. "You're not going to tell your Queen?"

I glance at her. "There's a traitor in the court. If we tell Selenia, she'll call an Auditorium—"

"How long were you planning on keeping that to yourself?" Reyan asks.

My face drops into my hands. I look back up at him. "I told you all that something was wrong nearly as soon as I arrived here. Then someone broke Amarris out of the dungeon. The Kadranians impossibly maneuvered their forces behind our surprise attack. On top of all that, someone tried to assassinate Riszev. Just how many things have to go wrong before it doesn't have to be me that tells you there's someone high up orchestrating all this?"

He scowls. A tense, empty moment passes before he says, "I'll gather the men myself then, leave the Lieutenants out of it."

"I'll keep it from my aunt," Riszev says.

"And the priestess?" I check.

She frowns. "Shava is loyal to me."

"And Reyan's manservant is loyal to him. We can't afford any risk of this getting out, Riszev."

"We can not afford to take no risks either. We must make choices. This is one we will not regret."

My jaw tightens. As much as I distrust the woman, Riszev knows her far better, and despite myself... I trust Riszev. "Fine. I'll get the wizards together, but I also need to tell Solus. I'm not going to trust anyone else with the words to get through the wall."

"How do we know Solus isn't the traitor?" Reyan asks.

Old suspicion darts into my mind, but the longer I think, the more it fades. The words from Agraund's letter rise in its place. "Because his first loyalty is to Morineaux." And Uncle trusted him with his life.

I must trust him with my country's.

Riszev twines her hands together. "So it's settled then."

We all pause, and the reality of the situation sinks in. If this doesn't work, we'll be the property of Kadran. And all three of us will probably die.

I swallow and turn to Reyan. "When will your men be ready?"

"I want to give them another day of rest, if we can."

"Tomorrow night, then."

"It'll have to be. Any later than that, and Selenia will empty the castle." I nod, and he stands. "I'll go call off the Lieutenants."

"No, let them talk. Call it off at whatever time you were going to. We don't want to chance anything odd getting back to the traitor."

He frowns but nods, and we all leave. As Riszev and I make it back into our suite, she glances over at me. "Are you going tomorrow?"

I resist the urge to suck on my lip. "Yes."

She slips onto the couch, arms curling over her chest. "You are set on it?"

"Would you hide within your castle walls?" I sit on the other end of the couch.

"No, but—" She looks away. Her voice is soft as she says, "It seems it is not so strange for your people to. If they think it best."

My lips twist, and I can't help but feel she's asking for more reason than her people wanting me to return to Retra. My silence speaks for itself, though.

Her knuckles whiten, but she unfists her hands as she rises, making some ward over her heart. "May Eri keep you and the field of battle praise your name." Expression tightening, she turns and slips into her room. The door closes firmly behind her.

My hand runs through my hair. Unless her goddess can keep me safe from poison, I don't think the odds are looking great. I walk to the bedroom and crawl into bed. Even now, I can feel it dragging my bones. My mind is clearer than it has been in... longer than I care to figure out, but I know I'm sick. The question is whether we'll be out from the terror of the Kadranians before the poison finishes its work.

I pull my covers higher. But maybe Illesiarr is right. Maybe the next few days will continue to feel like slogging through needly mud, and then it'll clear out of my system. I don't feel as bad as I did right after taking each dose. Maybe that means it's fading away. I hope it means it's fading away. I shift until I'm comfortable, half-propped up by pillows.

Ollem comes back in. "This is from the physician, milord." He hands me a sealed note, and confused, I take it.

Prince,

I have examined the substance your servant brought me. I believe that I have identified it, but I regret the results, my boy. If not for all the men in here, I would have sat down to speak to you about it in person. It appears to be Snare's Gift.

I wouldn't have put it together if I hadn't noticed that it reacted with cleansing water, indicating its magical properties. I don't know how someone would have made or procured this, but I have no other option to offer. Unfortunately, that also means there is nothing I can do about its effect on you.

I'm so sorry, my boy.

I can offer you some things to dull the symptoms. You would be comfortable. I would take care of you, Aster.

With great sorrow,
Illesiarr

Dully, I stare at the letter. Somehow, the magic-haters obtained a poison only magic can create. Just like with Mother before her time, I look at my hands and see those of a dead man.

I grit my teeth, folding the note back. I already thought I was dying. This doesn't change anything. I serve my people.

I glance up at Ollem. "If you would, return, 'Thank you. I appreciate the offer, but that won't be necessary.'"

He nods and starts to turn.

"And Ollem?"

He looks at me.

I pause. "Would you add, 'I'm sorry'?"

His brows draw, but he nods. "Of course, milord." He leaves.

It's fitting that something magical is what will kill me. Assuming I don't die tomorrow night, that is.

I close my eyes, afraid and alone. I slide off the mountain of pillows to lie curled up in the blankets. Still, I shiver.

I don't want to die.