PLEASE READ THIS AUTHOR'S NOTE FIRST BEFORE PROCEEDING DIRECTLY TO THE STORY—

I apologize for the delay on your part, but I feel the need to say this in advance: What you are about to read concerns sensitive topics that might be triggering to some people. This chapter talks of depression, self-harm, and attempted suicide — comments or remarks that make fun of such subjects will be considered offensive, and I will not hesitate to have them reported to the Wattpad authorities. You have been warned. You may proceed of your own volition, but please understand that I do not intend to trigger nor offend anyone with the plot of this specific oneshot, and I'm sorry if end up doing so.

Enjoy :)

•°•°•°

"Grit your teeth and let it hurt. Don't deny it, don't be overwhelmed by it. It will not last forever."

What does it feel like to drown?

In the water, the feeling is suffocating — Your breath gets caught up in your throat as the airways in your lungs constrict painfully. For fear of the agony that often came along with asphyxiation, no one ever longed for the painful sensations.

But if that were the case, then what was it like to drown in the darkness?

The darkness invokes a feeling much worse than just suffocation, and brings about a sensation much more than just pain.

When you drown in the darkness, you are left in a swirling paradox of emotions. Sometimes, the loneliness can prompt euphoria, though more often than not, what the loneliness results to is depression, rigour, and anguish.

There are also those times, far beyond rare, when drowing solitarily in the endless black allows you a chance to feel absolutely nothing.

Nothing, but the familiar numbness and quiet.

For (F/n), who's had the misfortune of experiencing both types of drowning, it was without a doubt that she would very much prefer the former type over the latter.

While — to others who have never truly felt emotional pain — drowning in the depths of the dangerous darkness seemed slightly more appealing than drowning in the depths of the dangerous waters, it was otherwise for (F/n).

Tragedy has always ruled her lifeless, colourless world — Tormenting her perpetually with the memories that originate from her mournful past. They lurk just around the back of her mind, forbidding her from any form of respite in this dreary life of hers.

At day, she kept her emotionless front active, never letting a word slip out of her mouth unless called by her teacher to speak or asked a question by her classmates. Despite all the opportunities to have spoken out loud, her responses still came occasionally, because often times her silence was enough of an answer to their numerous inquiries.

She would dismiss the mocking stares of the main campus students and pretend she didn't hear her own classmates in 2-D snicker at her and attempt to trip her. She'd act oblivious to the fact that some were feigning friendship with her and yet would, in fact, be the first people to begin backstabbing her once she was out of their sight. She was used to sitting at the back of the class and eating her bento all alone while she watched the rest of her classmates happily chatting away. Her elementary days had made her an outcast — almost untouchable at school.

She was quiet and obedient and perfectly willing to just go along with the flow that everyone began to think she truly was ignorant to their insults.

At night, however, her life was a whole different story altogether. When the once-light blue skies are painted different shades of indigo and dark orange, and when the faintest view of the moon has appeared high above, (F/n) collapses into a sobbing mess on her bed, completely disparate from the calm and composed female teenager she was at school.

The razors and the knives were her only best friends, and there was nobody who could dissever them from her at this point in time.

Because she was already so into the cutting.

And thanks to her long-sleeved shirts and makeup kits, she was able to get away with all of it, until of course, she had landed in the E-Class and met the Ikemen.

Isogai Yuuma was his name — A fairly tall teenage boy who was known throughout the batch for his amiable personality and warm features. His spiked, brown-coloured hair came with an adorable ahoge, and his pale gold orbs went well with his rather pale complexion.

Isogai was passionate and responsible with his work, always paying attention to Koro-sensei's lessons and helping others out with their reviewing. Standing alongside Kataoka as the Male Class Representative, the both of them were in charge of leading the class with patience and a sense of responsibility, something the boy had acquired from his childhood, since he'd come from a rather indigent family and was obligated to take good care of his younger siblings.

To many, Isogai was the perfect role model — A model student, a model leader, a model son.

But to both (F/n) and Isogai's best friend, Maehara, he was more than just a 'role model' classmate of theirs. He was family, in (F/n)'s eyes, though she would never admit that out loud. Isogai was like the older brother she never had — the father-figure she never had.

He was her only form of respite in this hell she called 'life', and she treasured him like how he treasured her.

As a matter of fact, he was the one who took her first kiss, and it wasn't even the most pleasant of her days when he had.

In contrast, it was one of the most horrible days of her life — (F/n) had just received word of her mother's untimely passing while she was at school; the person who'd raised her in the best way she knew possible and acted as her pillar of support when she was struggling to keep herself afloat on the water had fallen sick at the hands of breast cancer, an illness that would eventually take her life that fateful day. (F/n) was given permission by Karasuma-sensei to leave school early and head over to her mother's hospital, where she stayed mourning for hours on end.

And even before her mother's sister had made that particular call to inform her about it, (F/n) was already having a bad day. She ended up burning her own hand when she made a mistake while preparing breakfast, and Terasaka had chosen that day to abuse the very same hand by squeezing it painfully tight when she refused to give out what he and his circle of friends would call 'blackmail' — their unfortunate victim being Okano, who was the closest thing to a 'friend' (F/n) had in that class.

She was only protecting her best friend's privacy. What wrongdoing could she possibly deserve by doing just that? Afterward, she had made yet another careless mistake, and this time, it was on her Math test, which she failed in consequence. Karma had offered to tutor her after school that day, but his teases made her reluctant to accept.

Then Nakamura had beaten her in their student-vs-student matches during Phys. Ed period, and that certainly didn't lighten up her mood.

Needless to say, it was a day she would very much like to forget. And somehow, the only person who'd appeared to have taken notice to that was the Ikemen himself.

Prior to her very first actual conversation with Isogai on her second day in Class 3-E, Okano had pulled her aside and told her: "That guy ... I'm telling you, he's one of a kind."

"One of a kind? What do you mean by that, Hinata-chan?" (F/n) had asked, calling her friend by the nickname she requested to go by.

"Well, for one thing, he's a huge gentleman, as I'm sure you would've observed by now," Okano pointed out, "he's extremely polite and likes to stick to the rules, and that's partly 'cause he's our Male Class Rep and all, but it's really in his nature to always do the 'right thing', if you get what I mean."

"Yes, I get what you mean."

"But..." she drawled out. "There was that one time when he broke the rules, which is the reason why he's even a part of this lowly section in the first place despite being a really intelligent guy."

And so, with the much-needed detail, Okano told her about Isogai's family background and reputation. She immediately felt that she could relate to him — her family was poor as heck too, after all, and once when she was younger, she also had no choice but to take up a parttime job to provide additional money for her family.

Since then, (F/n) has harboured an even greater respect for the ikemen, and always made sure to obey his orders. She follows in his footsteps, and sometimes finds enough confidence to step up as their group's leader in certain activities.

Because of him, she discovered a kind of leadership ability in her that she didn't think she had before. She put her altruism to good use and learned to cooperate well with her teammates in spite of her introverted nature.

He was her inspiration, and he stole her heart — but, strangely enough, she didn't want it back. Once or twice, he'd catch her stealing glances at him during class, and she would always fail to fight back the blush that would make its way onto her cheeks.

In her eyes, he was just ... perfect. She decided she wanted to be like him someday.

But how could she? She was far from perfect. As far as she was concerned, she was the epitome of 'failure'. She was highly flawed, on the inside and the outside. She didn't have his courage, or the ease in which he completes whatever is asked of him. She definitely wasn't the sharpest crayon in the box, and she didn't have the wits he had. She looked like a walking trashcan in comparison to his nearly god-like looks. She was weak and as delicate as freaking paper, and he was one of the strongest in the entire class.

(F/n) knew she didn't deserve someone like Isogai. She knew he was totally out of her league, and even if she did have someone like him in her life, it would only be a matter of time when he would decide to leave little ol' her behind. Why would he even want garbage like her — scarred and broken beyond the point of healing?

But he did want her; he practically told her when he heard her drowned-out cries in the hospital that day.

It turned out Isogai had excused himself from class in his desire to watch over (F/n) upon overhearing her conversation with Karasuma-sensei. Koro-sensei had been tempted to disapprove, believing that she would prefer to be alone for the time being, but the moment he saw the immense worry in Isogai's eyes, he realized that he just couldn't say no. So Isogai followed her to her mother's hospital, and found her crying over a motionless Mrs. (L/n).

The one who used to greet her with hugs and kisses whenever she'd arrive home from school, the one who somehow knew that she was in the mood for pancakes and would proceed to cook them for breakfast, the one who would willingly clean up after the mess she'd leave every time she would cut herself up in the shower — gone, just like that, and (F/n) couldn't believe it.

It can't be ... this was just an insanely lengthy nightmare, right? She would wake up, find herself in her bedroom with her mother smiling brightly at her, and everything would turn out to be fine, right?

But it wasn't a nightmare. It was reality, and there was no waking up to happy mornings with pancakes for breakfast any more.

The only other person who saw her for who she truly was inside was dead, and (F/n) did not possess the power to bring her back to life. If only they had enough money to pay for the operation, or maybe — just maybe — they had consulted the doctor sooner about her mother's odd condition, then it probably wouldn't have had to come to this.

Once again, (F/n) had lost her family. First her grandmother, who she'd come to know and love by the time she was eight years old, had been run over by a ten-wheeler truck whose driver claimed to have not noticed her. Next, her father, a gentle man who wanted nothing to do with the war that he was forced to partake in and had been the cause of his passing. Now, her mother, who was the most beautiful woman (F/n) had ever met ... at that moment, she thought: this was the most cruel trick life had ever played on her, and it's played some pretty cruel tricks.

Her aunt had her own family to take care of and was barely even accommodating. Her grandfather ... well, forget about him taking initiative. Every time (F/n) and her immediate family would pay him a visit, he would voice out his despise on the idea that his son had 'the guts to bear a hideous child' with (F/n)'s mother, so obviously, he was never going to consider taking her into their home.

She was all on her own now.

As (F/n) weeped and wailed her heart out, she felt the presence of someone behind her, watching her every move and hearing her every cry, but she couldn't care less. Her mother's corpse lay right before her, exposed to her very eyes. The morgue was cold, unforgiving; and the knowledge that there were other dead people present inside with her certainly gave her the chills, and yet she refused to give in to her discomfort. She could only make sure she didn't do anything that could be considered disrespect towards the rest of the demised in the morgue — she sympathized with all those who have lost their loved ones too soon. After all, she knew firsthand what it felt like.

(F/n) was too focused on sobbing and on the lifeless body of her mother that she didn't realize Isogai was standing beside her, concern written all over his features. Her mother's skin was pale and her eyes were closed, but in her mind, (F/n) could still see that angelic face and hear that sanguine laugh. The memory was so terrifyingly vivid, she almost thought it was real ... it was so close she could just touch it, and everything would be alright...

And then, all of a sudden, (F/n) felt a kind of warmth in that cold room. Someone was hugging her tight, whispering into her ear. Who was it? She knew she had to tell them that comforting her was useless and they'd get nothing out of it, but she just couldn't bring herself to do so. It felt so warm to be in their embrace ... maybe if she closed her eyes and let herself sink into their grasp—

With all the force she could muster, she pulled back. (F/n) looked up and met the eyes of Isogai Yuuma. He stared at her questioningly, as though wanting to ask her if he did something wrong, but she just gave him a forced smile and said, "There is no reason for you to be here."

Teary-eyed and heartbroken, (F/n) rushed out of the morgue and rushed to the rooftop. Naturally, the Ikemen chased after her, but she was faster. She stepped out into the area lit only by moonlight and locked the door that Isogai would've used to come on the rooftop with her.

At night, the city remained as busy as ever, with the still-open buildings and the highly populated streets. But (F/n) saw the city in a different light — a cluster of stars and planets that made up a galaxy. The illumination provided by the buildings, the headlights of cars, and the cellphones of commuters represented the stars when viewed from Earth as tiny bright spots in the night sky. The buildings, the cars, and the people themselves represented the planets. As a whole, the city appeared to be a galaxy of lights, especially when seen from afar ... or from a high place like the rooftop where (F/n) was standing on. The sight truly fascinated her.

It was a shame this would be the last time she'd ever be able to marvel over this galaxy.

(F/n) could hear the faint yells of Isogai from behind her, begging for her to unlock the door, but she pretended that she couldn't. There was nobody else on the rooftop — nobody but her, which was of course made things easier for her. Slowly, she walked over to the edge where a barrier stood, lining the perimeter of the rooftop and preventing her from falling to her death. (F/n) had just managed to step onto it when the door slammed open and Isogai ran to her startled form.

"(L/n)-san!" he exclaimed with great distress, "Please—just—wait!"

And wait she did as he stopped before her.

"Please ... whatever it is that you're about to do, don't do it." Isogai pleaded, desperation present in his tone of voice.

"And what is it that you think I'm about to do?" (F/n) countered as she held his gaze.

Without warning, Isogai had grabbed her right arm by the sleeve and lifted it up to unmask her numerous cuts. (F/n)'s eyes went wide with shock, and she tried eminently to pull away from his grip, but he was too strong.

"L–let me go," she begged, "Isogai-san, let me go-!"

"Why, (L/n)-san?" he cut her off, gold eyes glazed with what she could only assume to be anger, but she didn't know if that anger was directed towards her or not. "Why didn't you tell any of us about this?"

"And why should I?" (F/n) retorted, voice cracking. "Even if I did tell you guys about this, you would've just laughed it off and said 'surely you can do better than that'. No, better endure it all by myself than risk sharing with you the tale of my sufferings."

"But isn't that what friends are for, (L/n)-san? We're here to help you, support you, and laugh with you — we would never disregard your feelings like that, (L/n)-san!"

"And how do I know for sure that you won't? For years I've been lied to! People calling themselves my 'friend' and telling me that they would always be there for me no matter what ... but then they discover my flaws and all of a sudden, I'm left eating my lunch alone in a cafeteria filled with happy students!"

"Then pick your own friends, (L/n)-san! If the likes of them don't deserve your kindness, then leave them be. Don't ever stoop down to their level. Try to find someone else who's ... who's ... unique! Someone who relates to you and doesn't care whether you're flawed or not. There's bound to be at least one person like that — that special someone who keeps their promises and would willingly go out of their way just for you."

"But that's the thing, Isogai-san," (F/n) cried, "there's no one like that. No one keeps their promises and goes out of their way just for me."

"How are you so certain? You haven't met everyone yet to know that." Isogai dropped his grip on her hand in preference for gently cupping her face. "I cannot promise you that there won't be any other painful days from here on out, but if you just step off that ledge and come down ... I will do my best to help you, no matter what."

"You are a gentleman, Isogai-san," (F/n) spoke, and when she did, she saw her own breath. The chilly air was freezing her. "but you aren't a knight in shining armor. No matter how hard you try, you will fail in the end. Believe me, everyone else who's been selfless enough to attempt at piecing my broken self back together has ended up in an even more miserable fate than what I'm forever stuck in. Don't do this to yourself."

"I may not be a knight in shining armor, (L/n)-san, but like I said: I will do my best to help you no matter what. I don't care if it makes me just as miserable, as you say, because as long as I see that you're happy, I'm happy too." Isogai took to note the way she trembled because of the city's low temperatures, and pressed himself closer to her in an effort to keep her warm. (F/n) noticed this and blushed, but she stood her ground nevertheless.

"I'm not worth your help."

"Everyone is worth everyone's help, as long as it comes from the heart. Please, (L/n)-san. I might not have known your mother personally, but I'm sure she wouldn't have wanted you to do this."

"But my mother's gone, Isogai-san!" (F/n) yelled with tears in her eyes as she recounted in her mind what her mother had once told her: 'Never give in to the currents; strong or weak, you must fight back.' (F/n) remembered how they talked about the sea and all its majesty in such enthusiastic ways, for they both enjoyed the water, and even had numerous books at home about it—until, at least, the day when she nearly drowned at a resort where they once spent their vacation. By 'currents', the (F/n) before believed her mother meant the ocean currents, the beach waves, but the (F/n) now knew there was more to that.

How much meaning does it still hold, now that the person who'd spoken those very words had passed away?

"Even so, (L/n)-san, I believe you must continue living your life the way you have once lived it." Isogai continued despite her previous outburst. "Wasn't there a time from the past when you had lived in such a manner that was carefree and innocent? Maybe you can still recall those times. Weren't they more pleasant than the times of late?"

"Yes ... of course they were ... but that doesn't change my perspective on life, Isogai-san. I cannot return to that blissfully ignorant child I was back then ... that would be unfair to my mother, my father, my grandmother..." (F/n) sniffled. "All of whom have now settled in a place far away from this land of the living."

"And why would it be unfair, (L/n)-san? Shouldn't you be carrying on what's left of their legacy now that they have gone?" Isogai asked of her.

"B–but ... I can't! I'm weak, stupid, and I–I can't even do anything right!" she took once step back from the boy in front of her. "I should not have been born in the first place ... that would've made things better for everyone."

"No, it wouldn't, (L/n)-san," Isogai grabbed her hand once again and gingerly tugged her towards him, away from the rooftop edge. "you shouldn't think of yourself that way. You're just as precious a person as we all are. It's true that you've got your weaknesses and flaws — we all do — but that doesn't make you any less worthy of being alive and well. Please, just ... come down here, (L/n)-san. The E-Class and I have no plans on abandoning you, and Koro-sensei will be greatly displeased if I return to the class with you not in sight."

"Why will he be displeased when he's got one less student to 'take care of'?"

"Because Koro-sensei isn't like that, (L/n)-san. He treasures every single one of his students, and we treasure every single one of our classmates. Don't you believe that, (L/n)-san?"

"I ... don't..." (F/n) insisted, and yet even as the words left her lips, she already knew she was just lying to herself. She could still recall Okano's most friendly of gestures, Kayano's most blithesome of moments, Okuda's most generous of actions ... she could still recall the most beautiful of memories she's ever made with the class, so what reason was there for her to doubt them?

Isogai's expression turned incredibly sad for a second there, but he didn't give up.

"What about Okano-san? She's your best friend, isn't she?" (F/n) knew the Class Rep was tugging at straws, desperate to get her to step off the ledge with him.

"Yes, she is..."

"She wouldn't be happy if she hears that you gave up so easily."

(F/n)'s gaze hardened, and she looked at him distastefully. "If she hears that I gave up so easily...?"

"That's exactly what I said, (L/n)-san." Isogai met her eyes, and though she knew she must not let any reaction show, her face expressed irritation as she found herself unable to read whatever was going on in his mind. Perhaps it was due to the fact that her vision suddenly turned red, and she felt all the unshed anger wash over her in an instant.

"I endured the asperity and the solitude for more than half of my life, and you're telling me that I'm giving up too easily?!" she spat in his face. "How dare you! Just because you don't know what it feels like—"

And then their lips collided together in one swift, gentle motion. Stunned, (F/n) could only stand still, eyes wide, as Isogai wrapped a strong arm around her waist and carried her off the ledge where he stood on the ground. Being an inch taller than her, he had to bend down a little bit to have their noses make contact with one another, and a pinkish hue made its way onto her cheeks as she screwed her eyes shut. She lifted one of her arms to tightly grasp his sleeve, fearful of dropping to the floor as her knees began to buckle from underneath her. Her other arm was being held in place by his free hand, and though she persisted on wriggling about, he did not let her go.

The kiss lasted for a few more seconds, before Isogai had to pull away, leaving (F/n) breathless and gasping for air like a fish out of the water. He just took her first kiss without her consent! And yet she didn't do anything to protest against what had just occurred. She just stood there, watching as his eyes darted around the area frantically, landing upon every other thing that wasn't her figure. He was blushing and obviously on the verge of panicking, and (F/n) found it adorable. All the anger from his uncalled-for remarks moments ago had faded away as she realized he was probably just looking for a way to distract her before making his move.

Eventually, after one silent minute between the both of them, (F/n)'s gaze fell upon the ground beneath her feet, still blushing away like crazy. She couldn't come to terms with the fact that he had kissed her just like that, without any warning, and yet it still felt right to her. It felt like he just straightaway handed over the piece of herself that had gone missing long ago, when she was still prey to the veiled terrors of the world. It felt ... good.

Just then, a hand reached out to grab her chin and slowly tilt her head up. (L/n) (F/n) and Isogai Yuuma looked at one another, paying attention to each other's unique features as though it was the first time they'd ever seen each other. (F/n) remained at a loss for words as she stared at him, and he stared right back. For months she'd been trying (and failing) to catch his attention — volunteering to help out after class even if she didn't need to, proclaiming herself as her group's leader despite not having to do so, willingly playing along with Koro-sensei's little 'pranks' — and now, she had it all to herself. His attention was on her, only her, and yet she didn't cower under his gaze like she would cower under others'.

He was special.

"You are special, (L/n)-san, so please ... don't ever throw your life away like that as if it means nothing. We care for you, and we don't want you to feel this way about yourself." Isogai told her reassuringly, the smile on his face screaming complete sincerity. "Tell you what, maybe it'll help if I suggest a few things. If your problem lies with the school 'bullies', as much as possible, try not to let them get to you. They just want to mess with your mind. If you feel that you need our assistance on the matter, don't hesitate to talk to us about it. If your problem lies with your own family, or if you find yourself stuck without any clue on how to keep moving forward following your mother's passing, Koro-sensei and Karasuma-sensei — even Bitch-sensei — are always ready to help you out. Whatever the problem might be, you don't always have to carry the weight of the burden all alone, (L/n)-san. You've got us."

She could feel herself beginning to tear up again.

"Believe me. I myself have learned — during the Sports Festival from earlier this week — that always forcing yourself to face your problems head-on without having any friends to back you up doesn't usually work out so well. Sometimes, you're gonna need the people you trust to offer you the support and advice you need. You need not continue living a life of solitude, (L/n)-san."

And then Isogai paused, as if he was trying to figure out how to proceed with his little speech. He wore a sheepish expression when he then spoke:

"That is ... umm ... if you don't want to live a life of solitude any longer, of course."

With that, (F/n) got on her tippy-toes and pressed an affectionate peck on Isogai's cheek, earning her yet another flustered blush from him.

"I certainly do not, Isogai-kun, which I guess means that I shall be taking your advice to heart." she grinned all teasingly at his stupefied form, before reverting back to her timid self. She dropped her gaze and stared at his shoes, a tiny and — for the first time in a long while — genuine smile claiming her lips. "Thank you ... for never giving up on me, as I once saw myself giving up on life."

She felt him cupping her face in a passionate manner once more as she looked up and he leaned toward her. Now, she knew what was gonna happen — oh no, he was not gonna catch her unawares anymore. She closed her eyes and leaned towards him just as he did...

"AAAAAH! CHILDREN, LOOK AWAY! WHAT APPEARS BEFORE YOU IS A SCENE YOU ARE STILL TOO YOUNG TO WITNESS! SPARE YOUR EYES FROM SUCH A SIGHT!" shrieked out a man from (F/n) and Isogai's far right. They both turned their heads to the reason behind the sudden interruption of their kiss, and saw an immensely discomposed Koro-sensei flailing around with his wiggly tentacles. Behind him were the rest of the E-Class, all facepalming in unison at their teacher's crazy antics. Karasuma-sensei and Irina-sensei were also with the still-jittery octopus, and they were evidently agitated by everything that was currently happening.

Though she felt a twinge of embarrassment deep inside, (F/n) could only let out a hearty laugh, straight from the serene waters.

——

Wews, that was a handful. But hey, at least Reader-chan and Yuuma-kun got a happy ending — the second time in a row, with last time being Nagisa-kun's chapter! Ah, the good times.

I would like to dedicate this chapter to Takashi-N, who has been in the sidelines cheering me on for as long as I could remember; to Alaine_Paul_Geronimo, who took the time to proofread this whole chapter for me despite being insanely busy at home; to nkkalxs, who I hope finds enough inspiration to resume in writing; as well as to loeysarang, who I also hope finds all the motivation she needs to continue her book. I highly recommend checking out her profile! Please give her EXO-related books a little bit more love :) I appreciate it, guys. Really, I do ^^

Moving on ... I truly wish that, in spite of all that has happened throughout the whole chapter, it was still an enjoyable read for you guys. I hope I didn't end up writing down anything that may have been offensive, triggering, or just completely out-of-place here, and to all those suffering from self-harm tendencies and suicidal thoughts out there, I have something to tell you:

Don't lose yourself to the heartache.

Sure, you may feel you're better off just giving up, and holding out for any longer is probably gonna make you insanely tired, but try not to think of it like that. Think of all the good that's gonna result from your fighting — from your will to move forward. It may seem pointless now, but if you believe that someday, everything will be alright ... I'm sure that'll do the trick :) Just keep on fighting. If it helps, consult the one person you trust the most about your struggles. You don't have to try and survive life by yourself.

What about all the other people who care for you? There's gotta be at least one other guy who cherishes you genuinely, right? Are you really ready to leave that person behind? Are you ready to give up the feeling of pages on your fingertips, the smell of old books and getting so absorbed in one that you forget the world even exists, a chance at stargazing, the fragrant incense of bakeries, misty mornings by the sea, quiet afternoons spent listening to some classical music, the sound of gentle rain falling upon your windows as you try to fall asleep, drinking hot cocoa by a warm fireplace, the feeling of soft snow on your palms, late-night conversations, long drives out of town ... are you ready to give all that up?

Maybe you haven't experienced all those yet. But if you decide to give up now, you're never gonna get another chance to discover how it feels like to be happy. Are you truly willing to risk that?

I myself have never attempted committing suicide, nor have I made any attempts at self-harm, because I've never found a reason to give up on my life so soon. But that's just me. A few of my friends have once been submerged underwater ... and of course, I wanted to help them. It pains me to see them struggling. Most of them were able to break free from the water's clutches. They resurfaced and found all the more reason to live once they discovered a newfound hope. Some others, however, nearly drowned ... and I don't want that to ever happen again — to anyone. Do you really think you're better off just ... not living? I don't think so.

Please, like I said, don't lose yourself to the heartache. I know it's gonna be hard, but there are people who love you and would be greatly affected if you decide to leave them behind.

Thank you for taking your time to read this chapter — to view this lengthy author's note and, most especially, to live. Thank you for being a part of the Wattpad community, and for being a part of this world :)

Peace out <3

[Word Count (minus Author's notes): 5,251 words | Published: May 16, 2018]