2006

She pulled out her gun and clicked the safety off, aiming it right at his forehead.

"Last chance. You better tell me or I'll blow your head off, mister. Where is the document?"

"No, no, I'll--"

Quivering, he reached into his pocket and she noticed that he'd attempted to reach for the pistol in his waistband.

She jammed her elbow into his side and quickly tackled him down to the ground. "I gave you one chance, shithead."

BAM!

My windows were shut but I could still hear the loud music reverberating below along with the laughter and cheers from the people enjoying themselves.

We always had a new year party in our residency which I seldom joined.

I was in my bedroom absorbed in my diary, books sprawled all over the mattress, when I heard someone outside.

I opened my bedroom door to see Kabir perched at the edge of the sofa.

He noticed me and he looked surprised as his gaze went down...

Oh yikes, I wasn't wearing pants!

I quickly shut the door and leaned against the door, the embarrassment scale was soaring to the ceiling.

"Give this to your mom okay? Carry it carefully on the way back. The halwa is hot," My mother spoke from behind the door, obviously having packed something for the poor boy who was too traumatized to reply.

Why, God! why?

School, on the other hand, was becoming increasingly annoying.

Mrunal-my so-called friend twirled her hair and let out a generous laugh.

I simply looked at the group passively and when Mrunal gestured me to come over, I declined. I knew Mrunal had every physically attractive feature that conformed to adolescent polls which got her more popularity in junior high than when I met her but that did not let me tolerate the fact that she was giggling with a group of boys that I did not get along well with. I mean- boys whose neck I wished to wring with my bare hands one sunny morning.

Correction: I did not get along with almost any of them in that group at all. I simply could not go for the position of Miss popular's bestie because I couldn't tolerate those smug two-faced jocks who wanted to show the world how tough they were.

Most of my classmates of the opposite gender weren't of tolerable nature.

So, I just sat next to my trusty friend Vikram who was currently impressed by the tattoo collection behind my maths textbook. He wasn't one of those boys who just did stuff because he wanted to look cool. So I genuinely preferred his company.

And then there was Kabir who was twinkling among those masculine rodents. Kabir never attempted to be something he isn't. That's in his nature. He's always kind, straight forward and receptive to the other person's feelings. In short, a dreamboat.

As far as the teachings at Siya's convent goes, illicit thoughts about a person from the opposite gender is a sin. My mind seemed to think otherwise, so...

When we met for a Sunday brunch that week, it was Siya who initiated a conversation with Kabir and it was myself and Saloni left to deal with each other all over again. I glanced at the ceramic bowls of Machcher Jhol and the other arrays of fish-based delicacies placed on the table. It wasn't a surprise, considering that my hosts were half-Bengali.

"I went to school that day and had to climb those stairs and everything," Saloni said and I nodded, my mind elsewhere.

Mrs.Jha put down a glass of sherbet before me and I gave her a thankful smile, peering at her oblivious son through the rim of the glass. Well, everyone has had their share of inconspicuous ogling in their life.

Feeling my gaze on him, he looked straight at me. Only when he raised his eyebrows, did I realise that I was pinning him with my gaze and I adjusted myself in my seat and diverted my eyes.

But the question always is: Is he still looking at me? Omigod, is he still looking!

My traitorous eyes honed back on him casually and he was chewing his food slowly, still observing my bizarre manners.

I literally felt at that some point Kabir was going to know that some flowery feelings were blooming in me by some of my weird mannerisms and was going to use it as leverage against me.

Of course, that worry sprung from the day I saw my classmate telling his jock friends how clingy his girl is behind her back. Not that Kabir would ever behave like that sewer rat but still.

I cleared my throat. "Can I have the halwa?" I asked him pointedly and he passed the glass bowl over. Our fingers brushed and I drew in a quick breath, grabbing the bowl. I was behaving like those hopeless heroines in those movies who would combust under the touch of the male counterparts.

I wasn't one of them!

I think.

I looked around warily at the elders before serving myself a miniature portion of the sweet. I hate halwa.

"Seeming a little jittery recently?" Kabir said and he was perfectly audible over the chaotic symphony of voices.

"You know...Very important exam and all this year. Its um, stressful."

He tossed a slice of carrot into his mouth and rested his hands on the table. "Stressed? You?"

I tried to smile. "Yeah, you know...Teachers are a little tough on us," I laughed weakly.

"Hmm.Too bad..."

Not able to take the amused glint in his eyes, I was going to retort when Saloni interrupted us with a fresh scoop of gossip. Saloni continued to talk which didn't quite reach my mind but I nodded for her benefit.

Months flitted by.

I dropped my satchel on the sofa and was welcomed by the sight of my parents happily laughing at the dinner table and my sister working out calculus as if her life depended on it.

"Hey, Chinnu."(little one)My mother smiled affectionately and my dad ruffled my hair.

"Why is this little one so big?"

My sister snickered and I glared at her.

She, however, went back to her studies pretending not to see me.

"Siya isn't it 7 already? You should go."

My mother told her before disappearing into the kitchen.

Kabir was writing his Board exams that year and my sister was tutoring him in Math, the nerd she is.

"Aw, okay."My sister sighed reluctantly, closing the calculus book and looking at it lovingly while I slumped on the sofa to watch Ben 10.

"Oh, is she gone? "My mother asked a while later.

I stopped rummaging for my snacks when she peeked out and nodded vigorously.

"Arey, I prepared fish curry and Lata loves it. I should've sent some with her, "She lamented.

My dad tipped off my mother about sending messenger number two there. Poor little me.

"Oh god."

I pouted while receiving the Tupperware box from my mother

and putting on my slippers without bothering about my appearance.

My pigtails were all messed and my faded t-shirt owned a little juice stain saying hello.

Mrs.Jha opened the door.

"Shyla beta!"She exclaimed and I smilingly handled the tiffin box.

"Come in, come in!"

And let Kabir see me like this? No thank you!

But to my luck, Kabir and Siya came to the door.

Kabir gave me a once over.

I wanted to dig a hole and live there.

His casual look was too much.

His thick dark locks were a little messed up and he was sporting a dark polo shirt with the first few buttons undone and a pair of khaki shorts.

He didn't smile but his eyes glinted.

Like he was amused.

Oh, just get over it already Shyla!

My sister, however, dragged him back inside telling him that he had a few sums to go.

He groaned in reply.

"So um, aunty I'll get going, "I told her.

I took a deep breath and exhaled as I descended the stairs as I tried to think of Ranbir Kapoor instead, determined for the mission of getting over Kabir Bharadwaj Jha.

But where do people let others decide their life and roll with it? I had finally almost decided to get over that one crush I'd had in my life, hoping that one fine day I'll look back and laugh it off as some silly, immature puppy love that I'd nestled and hopefully even come to have peaceful, brotherly feelings for the boy.

But then, I certainly didn't expect Siya's charitable mouth to intervene in the least.

I was drawing in my room one lazy evening when Siya came up to me with her phone in her hands.

"You have a call."She said handing me the phone.

I dropped my shading pencil on the desk.

"Hello?"

Silence.

"Shreya? "I asked guessing one of my friends who called me often.

But the caller remained mum.

"Sanya?Nishika?Kayal?"

I heard slow steady breathing instead.

I laughed."Vikram, you dick!"

I guessed again. He was big on practical jokes.

"Who's Vikram?"A familiar voice demanded quietly.

"K-Kabir?"

When was the last time Kabir telephoned me? Yeah, last year when he wanted me to draw his biology diagrams.

"Hi."I managed at last.

"Hey, Shyla."

The way my name came out like a caress was just...I sighed inwardly.

"Ya. Um, is there something you want?"

"So I should call you only if I want something?"

"Well not exactly."

"Then?"

I remained silent.

"So I know what you said."He spoke.

"What I said?To whom?"I replied confused.

"Oh don't pretend. You can tell. It's fine."

"I have no idea what you're speaking about, "I confessed and he snorted.

"I'd appreciate it if you had been a little bolder."He said.

My sister came back to my room and I thrust the phone in her hands clumsily.

She took it with a huge grin.

"Ya Kabir?"She looked at me for a second and went out the room chuckling.

"What was Kabir talking about?"I asked my sister later that night.

She turned on the bedside lamp.

"Welllll...Remember the time you told me you had intentions for Kabir you're not supposed to have?"

"You didn't!"I said sitting up shocked.

She kept quiet.

"How could you!"I asked feeling hurt.

I recalled the sceptic way he spoke to me and facepalmed myself.

"Well, he was surprised and he wanted your number."I just stared at her while she continued."And I told him you don't own a cycle, let alone mobile and now I'm generous enough to let you use mine."

She waved her flip phone at my face as if it would completely make up for what she did.

Her phone pinged just then.

"Oh," Siya smirked reading it and turned the phone to me.

"Gnsd Shyla " It read.

I tore my gaze from the screen to see her smirking at me.

"You should thank me, sweetheart. I got your life settled. Now our parents don't have to hunt down a boy for you."

"Listen, you cheesehead!"I spoke sitting up."He spoke to me like a CID officer. And he didn't seem quite thrilled with the fact that I like him. Do you see him jumping with joy?"

Siya rested her face in her palm.

"No, but I don't see him looking repulsed by the idea either."

She grinned."And why is he texting you now?"

As if letting that thought sink, she turned over in bed with her magazine.

I sighed and shuffled next to her.

"Oh, aren't you going to reply to that message?"

Siya's face peeked out of the magazine.

I picked up the phone hesitantly.

"Gud nite K"

The reply was almost immediate.

My sister's smirk was now too big for her face.

"K? Thought you'd come up with a better name ;)"

I read and reread the message.

And what was with that winkey? Kabir never uses emojis.

Someone must've hacked into his phone.

I shut my eyes after switching off the air conditioner.

"I'd appreciate it if you'd been a little bolder."

His words echoed in my head and I fell asleep dreaming of Saloni trapping me in Barbie land.

Miserable.