My mother eyed me sadly while I took another noisy sip of juice from my glass, legs dangling from the armchair.

"All alone, my little bidda," She sighed.

"Ma, I'm alright. I watched some tv, I read... It's fine!" I explained to allay her trepidation.

"Entire day?"

"Entire day," I confirmed.

"Tomorrow we'll leave you in Suganya's house, I'll pick you up while returning. There she'll take care of you." She said it quite resolutely as if it was the safest haven for any 18-year-old during her vacation.

"Maaa!" I protested, clutching at the end of her dupatta as she got up to head towards the kitchen. "I'm okay here na? The maid cooks food, I eat and just hang around. You return by then. Done!" I concluded brightly. I was always approachable to offer a clean solution. I hope my mother was aware of this skill of mine.

She peered from the kitchen with narrowed eyes, "You go hang there, upside down also."

I slumped back, defeated. My mom made up her mind. It was done. Tomorrow was dedicated to sitting jobless in my second cousin's house.

And I thought I could practice riding the bike for sometime tomorrow as well. I was becoming a pro at it. A pro at driving in an abandoned alley with no more vehicles to challenge my redirecting skill.

"Chinnu?" Her voice called out after some time.

"What?" I hollered back.

"There's no turmeric and pudina powder. Will you get it for me now?"

That was not an open-ended question. I pinched a few notes from the cracked china jar in the almirah, pocketing it in my sweats.

"Anything else?" I hollered, strapping my sandals.

She returned, hands grimed with white flour and sized me up in my faded Batman shirt and grey sweats.
"Where do you get these improper clothes?"

I stifled a smile, "You buy them for me."

She mumbled something incoherently for that.

So I proudly took the stairs to get these imperative ingredients. It was late in the evening and the trees cast a dark shadow over the building, giving it a slightly spooky aura. Well, my block did have a reputation of living up to it's rumoured expectations.

But what caught me off guard as I ventured further into the path was that the place seemed kind of ominous, none of the aunties was sitting on the benches, discussing in hushed whispers and giggles while watching their children play. No impromptu cricket matches as well.
Girls my age usually gave guest appearances on a blue moon day for a game of squash, but otherwise, I wasn't surprised about their lack of presence. Only one uncle was fast walking around the building, puffing his chest up
and sweating so profusely that his grey vest was becomingly increasingly wet. It wasn't a pretty sight.

Sweaty uncle paused to smile at me and I nodded, hoping he wouldn't stop for a chit chat.
But to my relief, he rounded the corner, now breaking into a jog.

As I approached the gate, I noticed a few male creatures in the parking. Judging by the lean physique and the dark mousse-like hair, I knew it was Kabir who was nodding silently to his companion.

Facing away from me.

Ugh, I felt like a lump was adamantly stuck in my throat in dread of confronting him. My words weren't exactly poetry and I thought he knew this. Instead, he goes ahead and messages Siya as if I had embezzled him or something.

For a moment, my feet diverted towards him and I realised that I will have to get his attention amidst his male companions' teasing whistles.
Such drama queens they were.

I quickly crossed the road to the little store, by the end of the lane and picked up the two little packets and stuffed it into my pockets. Thank heavens for sweat pants. Most of the desi female attire didn't accommodate practical stuff such as this.

I dodged a few cars quickly which seemed like they were intent on spearheading into my backside.

Only to return to the same spot and find that my target disappeared.

The other boys were still there, noisily bantering among themselves. A few of them even turned in my direction, feeling my gaze on them.

David wasn't there either. For me to ask his friend's whereabouts.

Oh, to hell with it.

I stalked past them with a huff and peered into the pathway of the parking lot.
It was dark and empty. Sweaty uncle took a turn and was jogging, his breaths coming out in loud splutters.

I noticed a flutter of blue on the left and noticed the lone figure silently cutting into the direction of Kabir's block, his frame was masked from my line of sight by the rows of the cars parked on the side.

Aha, it surely is...!I will clear this misunderstanding once and for all.

I approached him, feeling acutely aware of the gut-wrenching butterflies fluttering around in my stomach.

He seemed to have sensed my presence behind him and he turned. Or probably heard my noisy sandals scraping against the ground.

The classic navy blue printed shirt contrasted his complexion which was actually not something Kabirish but was all the more attractive.

He removed an earplug from his ear and sized up my hesitant half-smiling face and then turned away.

"Kabir?" I called out, shocked that he just stalked away from me.

I glanced around just in case and fell in step beside him.

"What, you don't even what to talk now? I saw the message you sent Siya. Is this really how much you know me?" I half-whispered, just in case someone was in hearing range. "See, I know the way I spoke before my friends was stupid, but I didn't mean to phrase it that way, I mean it happens to everyone, you know--"

Without even as much as a sideward glance, he plugged the other earplug back and fastened his pace.

I wanted to grab his stupid iPod and fling it into the Thames.

"Come on, you can't not want to even talk about this, it's so petty!"

I bit my tongue when his eyes met mine and he nodded, "Petty.Right."

Well, in my defence: I didn't exactly think he would hear me with those stupid earplugs.

"No, not petty, I meant--"
Instinctively, my hands reached for his. 

I expected him to shake his hands from my grip and pelt me with a few unpleasant words before leaving.

But he stood still in his place, half facing away from me.

His hands were warm and firm, and also a little rough from all the sports he played.

Not to gloat or anything, but I had long and slim hands myself but it seemed to be no match for his. The size of his hands swallowed mine effectively.

Then he turned to me and raised an eyebrow.

Oh, right.

I cleared my throat, hoping to make the best use of my opportunity.

"I... Don't know what to say. I know that a lot of things I do looks really bad in your perspective, but honestly, sometimes I really don't know what I want. But..." I sighed. "What you heard from Siya, was a little true. Okay, very true. "

Kabir was silent, and then I realised that I was standing a little too close to him, taking a little of the poor boy's personal space.

I stepped back and slid my fingers away, letting our hands drop back to our sides.

"Uh, and what I told before my friends were, I just babbled because I was embarrassed. And--"

Kabir's eyes sliced into me, " You mean you were embarrassed by me?"

What?

Kabir looked disappointed and was again, walking away in the middle of a conversation.

I caught up quickly, falling behind him, "Can you listen completely? Why would anyone be embarrassed of you? It wasn't that kind of embarrassed! I meant, embarrassed as in... FLUSTERED or even... Shy!"

I stopped only when I realised that we were at the moss-covered, uninhabited backyard that the residents had expected themselves to nurture, but didn't. Why didn't I even notice that we'd curved around the parking till the backyard?

I could still make out his features in the dark as he stepped forward and supported his palm on the wall, somewhat next to me.

He tilted his head a little, eyes twinkling. "So, this is how one gets words out of you?"

I stared at him, not understanding.

"So, you were shy. That was it?"

"Everyone should have a healthy portion of shyness in their system!" I defended myself as much as I should, partially due to the fact that apart from being in a slightly lonely place, Kabir's minty breath was wafting in close proximity.

I looked into his deep brown eyes and then involuntarily, my gaze roved over his face. Okay, must not panic.

"Aren't you going to make me feel better anymore? I'm still angry and upset," Kabir mused.

"But..." I hated my voice for sounding so fragile-"... You're smiling," I pointed out, shifting to my right foot.

"Maybe there's still some grief in my heart.Won't you want to make it better?"

I smiled."So, you want me to explain myself more?"

A corner of his lips quirked up. "Nah, I think you feeling shy is self-explanatory. Of everything."

Okay, what can I say now that wouldn't make this all the more awkward?
"So.....I'm leaving."

He sighed, "I guess you have to leave in the middle of a conversation if you're feeling kind of sh--"

I gave a little kick on his shin. "Does that feel shy?" I asked laughingly.

"I guess not." Kabir sighed, massaging his feet, "Do you always kick boys you like?"

"Hmm," I dived below his arm that supported the wall.

"Only those I really like," I amended.

"Good," He nodded, satisfied. "Hope there aren't too many."

I masked a smile, "Is that you or your jealousy speaking?"

"Everyone should have a healthy portion of jealousy in their system, Shyla."

I nodded, "So I'll be seeing you around."

Without awaiting a response, I turned away, the grin still intact on my face until I got to my house and my mother asked me if I developed some kind of facial paralysis.

Does my smile also not look like a fricking smile?

Come on, now!