How does it feel to drown?

Does it feel peaceful, as though you were flying? Do you see the animals around you and feel your last breath go as you smile?

Or was it something else? Was it something darker? Does your throat hurt, does your head pound, does everything you believe start to tear apart at the seams?

It felt like Percy Jackson was drowning. It felt like he was lost at seas, submerged under thousands of feet of water, crushed by crashing waves. The floodgates had been opened, and Percy was having a hard time swimming out of them.

He couldn't help but think of Annabeth. Gods, he always seemed to think of her, didn't he? It was always her, it always had been. Seaweed Brain and Wise Girl. Wise Girl and Seaweed Brain.

Even when it had felt like they were going to die, even when it seemed like all hope was lost, their 'always' never seemed to break. So why did it start to tear apart now? They weren't dying, their situation wasn't hopeless.

Or maybe it was. Maybe they were both swimming in the same ocean, but in a different sea. Maybe the currents were growing stronger, and maybe it was just a matter of time before they were swept away.

But then Percys thoughts drifted to Luke. It was hard to stop himself, really. He had been the only human interaction since his time on the boat, and his only source of what was going on in the outside world.

Luke had never looked so defeated before, he had never seemed so broken. Even when he was talking to Percy, he kept his head held high, but there was a sort of brokenness to it. Like he actually cared.

No, that couldn't be true. Luke Castellan cared about nobody but himself. He was lying about camp. He was lying about it all.

Was he?

That was the question Percy had replaying on a loop. He couldn't have been lying, or maybe Percy just didn't want him to be lying. He liked it here, in some odd and messed up way.

He liked Luke, he liked looking into his eyes and feeling the world drift away. He liked everything about Luke, and that was what scared him most.

There were two paths laid out in front of him, and for the first time in a long time, Percy had no one to help him chose.

It wasn't just between Olympus or Kronos, or Good and Bad. It wasn't even between Annabeth and Luke. It was between safe and dangerous.

He wanted to chose safe. He wanted to chose camp, where his friends and family and his life was. But he could only picture it as this big chunk of land, when all he wanted to do was go back to the sea.

You could drown at sea, though. And in a lot of ways, Percy already felt like he was drowning. He was drowning in waves of wondering, washed up by 'what ifs', and caught in currents of questions.

Gods, what was happening to his life? It should have been an easy decision. He should have been able to pick Camp Half Blood, jump in the water, and swim to safety. So then why did he still want to pick Luke?

The clock chimed, and Percy knew it meant it was seven. He slowly stood up, his everything still hurting. He opened the door, blinded by the light.

Percy walked through the halls of the ship, feeling out of place. When he finally made it to the dining hall, he found Luke almost immediately and hurried over. "Hey,"

"Hey Percy," Luke smiled. "I knew you wouldn't jump off the boat. Finally coming around?"

Percy didn't say anything, he just sat down next to Luke in silence. He looked up, eyes locking with Luke's. "Is camp really not coming for me?"

It was the first time Percy had ever really felt like a kid when Luke was around. It was the first time he had ever really felt broken.

"I'm sorry Percy. They aren't,"