"Seriously, what is that smell? I can't imagine where it may have come from..." my mom questioned as she scurried over to the kitchen, the source of the smell. The moment she entered, she frowned. "It's not even warm," she muttered as her hand hovered over the stovetop. She tested the oven, toaster, even the microwave. Nothing. Everything was fine until her pant leg tapped the side of the cabinet and a bit of paint stuck to it. She didn't notice. Well, at least that bought me a little bit of time, but she'd notice when she changed for the night. 

You screwed up. You screwed up. 

She moved back into my room. "I just got you the most BEAUTIFUL dress from the store today-- wait, where is it?" I held my breath. 

"I dunno. I haven't seen it," I muttered.  I didn't even know if she heard me. She shrugged and retreated to her room.

"Well, I'm sure it'll turn up." I sighed. I wasn't caught yet, at least. I pulled out a history book. Well, I did still have homework to do. History work. I flipped through the pages, searching for the page we left off on the day before. When I found it, I sighed and began to read. 

"Transitioning from male to female or female to male used to be vastly frowned upon. People firmly believed that the gender you are born with is your gender for life. They oppressed us all, nearly everyone, and we were even murdered all too often. It was a horrible time. We had to stop it. And thus, we began to genetically modify hundreds of cisgenders, turning them trans. After this, thousands, then millions, and then we reached a billion. As generation after generation inherited the mutation (while the trait originally could not be inherited from a parent, the modification we created could be inherited), the entire world took on a new shape of transgenderism. 

We believe that the cisgenders have been completely removed from this world. Although there may be a few remaining, we will treat them as they treated us." 

I frowned. This passage felt different from the rest of them. It felt more personal, more... biased. I slammed the book shut. I didn't want to read that stuff anymore, or ever again. I packed the book away and collapsed on the bed. 

Every day is fresh hell...

Honestly, the next few hours weren't very clear to me. I think I was drifting in and out of sleep, but it just felt like a constant passing of time. Time passed ridiculously quickly yet not quickly enough. I wanted to see days pass, then months, then years. I wanted the decades to flip by like pages in a book. I wanted the satisfaction of finishing that book and snapping it closed, tossing it across the room and burying under the covers because it took me so long to finish and now it's so very, very late... 

Or I could just close the book early. Yes, I could. I could cruelly rip out every remaining page. I could throw the book away and let it break down in the dirt. Let it be the dirt. It's already useless enough. Maybe it'd be more useful as dirt that could grow flowers and fruits and...

I shook my head again. When I looked up, I saw that the sun had disappeared into the night. My mom hadn't said anything to me or confronted me about the paint or the ashes. The world melted into night, and I melted away too...

------------------

When sun shone through the blinds, I was already gone. I didn't want to talk to anyone or do anything, so I left earlier than I usually did. I also had to leave a quick note on the kitchen counter so my parents wouldn't lose their mind over the fact that I wasn't there. 

There was a tree in an empty area that I found on my way to school one day. I liked to sit under it sometimes before going to school. It was a nice place to collect your thoughts and prepare for the world of school. It used to have girls and boys, but now only girlboys and boygirls. Soon, it would be filled with boys and girls, and the world would be complete. Everything would be correct. I closed my eyes to the rising sun. It shined an orange and red light over my closed eyes, and I smiled. It cracked my lips to do so. I winced. I glanced down at my phone--I had only brought it for the time, I didn't want to be late for school, if possible--to find that the time read 7:15. Twenty minutes to get to school, if I didn't want my first period teacher to scream at me. 

I could ditch... 

There wasn't anything important going on in first period. I could skip it, I thought. I could stay out here under the tree in the sunlight, maybe even fall back asleep. Sleep is the safest place on this horrifying Earth. 

I made a decision. I stayed under the tree. Unethical? Maybe so, but in my defense, school would have been the worst possible thing for me at that moment. I laid down under the tree, letting the sunlight fall over my skin. It was freezing out, but hey, I actually liked it, even though I usually hated cold weather. The sun was higher in the sky by then, and I was grateful for the light it cast. 

I decided I had to get to school for second period, at least. That was gym class. An unfortunate, missable class, but Ruby was in it with me and she'd ask questions if I just didn't show up. She's a smart girl, that one. I think she may be onto me and my secret. I glanced down at the time: 8:15 AM. That meant five minutes until the end of first period. I scrambled up, grabbed my stuff, and began running down the street at full speed, racing the time. I stumbled in front of the school at exactly 8:18. Two minutes till the end of first period, three minutes till second period starts. 

-------------

I ran into the gym right on time, then directly into the locker room. I caught Ruby's eye on the way in, and this time she didn't smile.