A/N: If you don't like Jeremy then this is the chapter for you :P

Also it's real short, but something is better than nothing right? XD

Chapter 5

Kirstie doesn't break up with Jeremy like I thought she would.
     She keeps coming over, only when Kevin's not there and she's told me that 'it's our little secret.' And that hurts a little, it almost makes me feel like she's still dating Jeremy because I'm not the kind of guy she can be seen with, that I'm just the kind of guy she can have sex with and then go home to her ken doll boyfriend.
     Wait... isn't that supposed to be the other way around? The girl is married to the ugly guy and sleeps with the ken doll on the side? But I guess in some cases it's she's married to the jerk and has an affair with the nice guy.
     I am still the nice guy right? I mean I'm here, helping Kirstie when she comes over, most of the time because Jeremy's been mean to her or something. I don't understand why she doesn't just break up with him and come and be with me? I would be so good to her. I would look after her when she was sick, not tell her she was gross and needs to face away from me at all times. Apparently he did that, and then her and I had sex so that she'd feel better about herself.
     It's making me feel worse, like I shouldn't do this, like the next time she comes over I should tell her no, no until she breaks up with Jeremy. And then she could sleep over and I could wake up with her in my arms.
     I could date... but then I'd feel bad. But it could make Kirstie come to her senses and dump Jeremy. But then I'd have to break up with the girl I was dating, and what if I ended up liking her? Or worse what if I broke her heart or something, I couldn't do that. I wouldn't want to break someone's heart, or use them like that. Even if I know it would work. The last time I dated someone Kirstie made it very clear, without actually saying anything to me, that she did not like Alice one little bit. The thing is, I don't think you can call two dates dating right? Cause on that second date we ran into Kirstie at the coffee shop, which is dumb because I don't even like coffee, but Kirstie gave her such a look that Alice didn't want to see me again. And for some reason it didn't even bother me that much.
     I've always liked Kirstie, the first time I met her I thought she was probably one of the most beautiful girls I'd met, and that side smirk, it really got me. And I told her that, I told her that I thought she was beautiful, she told me I was stupid. Am I still stupid for thinking that? No, no I'm not. I'm probably stupid though thinking that she'd leave a guy like Jeremy for a guy like me. He can give her so much more, he has money, he can get her everything she wants, and she wants a lot of shoes, I can't afford to get her shoes like he can.
     I live in a little apartment with Kevin that we can barely afford, Jeremy lives in a big penthouse apartment with Kirstie and their dog that he could afford forever. I know she'd never admit it, but she likes the luxury, she likes the big apartment, she likes the fancy restaurants and the expensive gifts, all the things I cannot possibly afford to get her. But she won't admit that, and I'd never say it to her, it's a really mean thing to say. I'm 99 per cent sure that that's why she's gonna be with him and not me.
     But there has to be something I can do, there has to be, I care about her way too much. I'm damn sure that I care about her more than he does. I wouldn't leave her by herself at a party like he did. Him doing that, is why she came to me, I'm not saying she'd do it again, or that everyone would do what she did when she was in that position, but it's clearly a thing that can happen when you don't pay attention to someone you claim that you care about Jeremy.
     And maybe Jeremy she came to me because she knows that I care about her so much more than you do.
     Also maybe I'm better at sex, I'd never actually thought about it that way until now.

A/N: I can't leave to serious when I'm writing from Avi's POV XD