Sheila

Here lies inebriated Sheila

You had your last shot of tequila

Staggered from the bar, hit by a car

The poor EMT had to peel ya

Lynette

 Here lies Lynette

A ravishing brunette

The pit band was jealous

She attracted all the fellas

They killed her with her clarinet

Kate

Here lies Kate

Al fresco dining is how she ate

Someone started to yell

When the air conditioner fell

But by then it was really too late

James

 Here lies James

Was addicted to video games

His wife became bored

Strangled him with the cord

Nintendo is all that she blames